Ian Gallagher: S3 versus S10
Gif by @sickness-health-all-that-shit
Long story short, Ian has been through a lot of shit over the years. Thatās not to say that Mickey hasnāt as well, and itās not to dismiss the way Mickey and the Gallagher siblings have tried to help Ian. For a brief but painful trip down memory lane, please continue...
I was rewatching S3 just for the angst of it all and stumbled upon the scene where Ian is talking to Lip about Mickeyās impending nuptials, back before our quite confident and madly-in-love ginger found out the hard way that love doesnāt always win. In that early phase of his budding relationship with Mickey, Ian didnāt need many reassurances from his hard-to-crack but softening-on-the-inside Southside thug. He knew in his gut that Mickey had feelings for him. And the above S3 scene occurred after that brutal beat down he instigated with Mickey in the abandoned courtyard.
Ian is absolutely convinced (and quite naive) that he and Mickey can somehow overcome the insurmountable forces keeping them apart, as long as they are together. He believes it in his heart of hearts and goes to Mickey, giving it everything he has to stop the wedding.
Mickey canāt give Ian what he wants, and we know why (aka, Terry will kill him). Even Ian knows why, but he believes so much in what they have between them, heās blind and hopeful, and I know he would have stood by Mickey and tried to protect him. But the entire situation DESTROYS Ian, and he enlists in the Army too soon and for all the wrong reasons.
And likely, these events contribute to his bipolar manifesting, along with his failed stint in the Army, which was his dream, even before Mickey came along. And with all that went the boy who saw a world of possibilities, a world that made sense.
Once Ian leaves the Army, he falls into a topsy-turvy world under the influence of his reckless mother. He essentially prostitues himself and uses illegal substances to self-medicate. His bipolar disorder goes undiagnosed and untreated. Thank fuck Mickey realizes he canāt live without Ian, and knowing heās somewhat responsible for whatās happened, goes to find him. We are given (almost) two beautiful and gut-wrenching seasons of Ian and Mickey reconnecting. Eventually, Mickey (and the Gallagher siblings) recognize that Ian is sick and try to get him help.
Enter Sammi and Monica (and BTS drama, broken contracts, and reshoots), but regardless, we see Ian begin to doubt that he is worthy of Mickeyās love and that he fears destroying his boyfriendās life, rather than enriching it, though Mickey knows better. So much so, Ian breaks up with Mickey, and we all die.
Mickey gets ripped away from him (no need to debate that here - itās awful all around), and Ian (miraculously) starts to find his way, including a career he loves, a few other dudes heās lukewarm about, and eventually has the opportunity to escape to Mexico with Mickey and have all the time in the world together, which has never been afforded to them. But Ian doesnāt go.
Maybe itās fear of his MI going unchecked, and he doesnāt want to hold Mickey back. Maybe itās not wanting to give up the stability he thinks heās finally achieved. Maybe heāll miss his family too much. Maybe heās just being selfish. Or a combination of all of the above. Truth be told, I wanted to see the eternally optimistic Ian from S3 emerge and make a run towards felices para siempre with Mickey, but that Ian was long gone.
Season 8 happens, Monica dies, Trevor sucks, and Ianās life unravels. In his darkest hour, Mickey is there for him again, having sacrificed the freedom that Ian was so happy to see him achieve when he successfully crossed the border.
Mickey gave up everything for Ian. Again! Again?!? Does he deserve it? Plenty of people say no, though Mickey could give two shits - he loves his man. But the pressure! Oh, the pressure! Living in a tiny cell together, probably not dealing with their own shit, nor their unresolved relationship issues. At least not very well.
And to top it all off, Ian finds out that heās getting released first - another turn of events he probably figures he doesnāt deserve and is willing to forfeit for Mickeyās sake.
Iām rambling now, and too lazy to recap some of the S10 foolishness, but I do want to point out how vulnerable and open Ian has tried to be with Mickey this season. I hate that he broke Mickeyās heart at the courthouse and that him checking on Mickeyās feelings came across as insensitive and a slap in the face. I believe he meant well, and I can understand why he is where he is, so far from that boy with all the love in his heart and dreams for something better - for him and Mickey - after everything that life (and the show) has thrown at them.
S3 Ian was shocked, shocked at this turn of events. He really believed he could convince Mickey to stay with him.
Well, S10 Ian, itās time to go get your man! š
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