god striking me down

blake kathryn
i don't do bad sauce passes
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
tumblr dot com
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DEAR READER
Cosmic Funnies
One Nice Bug Per Day
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
No title available

Kiana Khansmith
AnasAbdin
we're not kids anymore.
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
d e v o n
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

@theartofmadeline
Keni
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seen from Singapore

seen from United Kingdom
seen from Brunei

seen from Singapore

seen from Malaysia
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seen from Saudi Arabia

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@shaved-for-nothing
god striking me down
me: wow things are actually going really well for once!
the crippling anxiety, waiting in the corner:
REMEMBER SKIP-IT FROM THE 90āS
my weapon of choice duringĀ school yardĀ fightsĀ
Judge magazine, 1921
this has been a mood for nearly 100 years now
What secret will you take to your grave?
In Dutch, when you boil an egg and then place it into cold water to make it easier to peel an egg, itās called āto scareā the eggs.
One day when I was about 6 or 7, my mom asked me to āscareā the eggs. So, little joker I was, lifted the lid of the pan and yelled āBOOO!ā
My mom cracked up and has been telling this story ever since, for over 20 years. Sheās come to love the story and still truly thinks that I wanted to really āscareā the eggs. Truth is I knew what āscaring an eggā meant and only wanted to make her laugh because she was in a sad place and time back then.
Itās made her laugh for over 20 fucking years, that means itās the best joke Iāve ever pulled off and Iād die before Iād let her find out I was just kidding.
This is the sweetest thing.
you fucks better start using colored text everywhere like youāre a school girl who just got a pack of glitter pens for her 12th birthday
Or a pen with multiple colors
*click* *click* *click* *click* *click* *click* *click* *cliiiiiiiick*
on all levels except physical Iām already retired and living in a cozy cottage where I grow plums in my garden
me when my mom says weāre getting mcdonalds
Jesus Christ what is happening
weāre going to mcdonalds
Big ADHD mood
me: thinks abt c*ddling for 2 minutes me @ myself: shut the hell up u arenāt in a John green novel. grow up and move on.