the sun is up; the sky is blue

just a little southern lady livin' her Rocky Mountain dreams

[shemayest]

I haven’t updated my tumblr in EONS. 

Life has been insane lately. The last 2 months of the school year were a total whirlwind and I somehow came out alive and well. I decided to keep teaching another year or two and reassess what I want later. For now, the trade off of free summers and holidays was too good to give up. We are also going through some changes in leadership at my school, so I think that it could be a really awesome thing. 

I took some students camping in Page, AZ at the end of May and it was incredible (see: photo of me hanging at Horsehoe Bend). They spent the entire spring semester learning about types of energy, reading The Emerald Mile, studying hydroelectric dams and the Glen Canyon Dam - so, we took them to see the Dam, hang out on Lake Powell, visit Antelope Canyon and Horseshoe Bend. It was such a cool experience!! Totally what school and learning should be like - if school was like that year round, I may not be reconsidering my career path.

Summer officially began and we have been floating on the ~*bOaT*~ aka raft with a fly fishing frame that can be taken off. We are little whitewater N00bs and it rules. We spent our first weekend of summer floating 10 miles of the Rio Grande and camping in the National Forest. 2 of Kemper’s best childhood friends from Denver met us there with their boat as well. It was insanely beautiful and there is just something so rejuvenating for the soul about sleeping outside and not showering and being in the dirt and looking at the stars. It was the most perfect way to kick off the season. 

I am feelin’ GOOD, folks. 

[shemayest]

Sometimes you gotta take a break from your actual job and do a little bit of work for your online course on HTML/CSS coding. 

Happy Women’s Day, y’all <3

[shemayest]

Wild Geese by Mary Oliver

You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting   over and over announcing your place in the family of things.

[shemayest]

SO MUCH SNOW. and so much skiing.  This winter, we don’t have to sit in hours of I-70 traffic to go skiing. In fact, we only have to drive 30 minutes! And there is never any traffic - hallelujah! So, I spend a crap-ton of money back in October and bought plethora of ski gear and decided this was the year I became a skier (officially!) and not just someone who goes once a year and is terrified all day and falls down 100 times and has no idea what I am doing. Dare I say, I have gotten pretty good! It is great because winter can be so hard to stay active. I love exercising outdoors in the summer by hiking and biking and whatnot, but in the winter I feel like a poopy slug because all of the snow (and frigid temps) make those activities less fun/really difficult. Now I have found an activity that I literally daydream about all week long and spend as much time as possible on my weekend doing. Which is pretty neat and fulfilling. 

Living if the mountains is the best ever and I seriously have no desire to return to Denver, like, ever. 

Off to grade 43 more research papers. XOXO GUYZ 

[jaclynnicolee]

[shemayest]

I die. Every single time. Joey4eva.

[shemayest]

November 1st (and 2nd!): I am beyond thankful for the unconditional love and support and joy I receive from being with these TWO wonderful gentlemen. Even when I feel like giving up and throwing in the towel or falling victim to defeat and negativity, these two pull me through and lift me up and give me more grace than a girl could ask for. I'm one lucky lady. #november #aMonthOfThankfulness #itshouldbeeverymonth #butlifeishardsometimes #remindersareneeded

[delta-breezes]

[shemayest]

Since Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays and since I really need a boost of morale right now through some dark days, I decided to (jumped on the less common band wagon) make it A Month of Thankfulness. 

Every day (hopefully...) I will photograph and talk about one thing I am especially thankful for. Today’s post is on my Instagram and Facebook but still need to link it to here and will do so shortly. I encourage anyone and everyone to join me in this month of remembering all the things we have in this life to grateful for! 

[robinshoots-blog]

Happy Halloween Week! 

Photography: Robin Roemer 

Makeup: Ashley Gomila 

Hair: Wendy Diaz

[gracehelbig]

eeeeeeee

[shemayest]

Grace is to me what Beyonce is to everyone else. 

[nickcarnera-deactivated20180325]

[shemayest]

I am PRETTY READY for this. 

El Nino, we’re waiting. 

Love, everyone in Colorado 

[shemayest]

The last 2-3 weeks have been exceptionally difficult. I have been in a pretty dark place and I mostly find that my job is the root of it. Which is just unacceptable. Because I have one little old life to live... and jobs are gonna suck sometimes and they won’t always be what fills me up and brings me job. So while I spend some time going inward and rethinking exactly what it is I want to spend my time doing and if that means a career change or not, I also just need to spend some time going inward, period. I am a very reflective person but I am also a ball of denial sometimes. I literally curl up in a ball and just hope everything goes away while I passively wait and watch. This is a ridiculous habit! I have control over how I react, interact, and think about myself and my life. Even when my insides feel icky and I don’t feel the desire to do things I normally enjoy, I get out of bed and I go and do and I handle it. Life doesn’t slow down and wait, even for illness (whether physical or emotional) and that is so scary and beautiful. I have to keep moving. SO. While I turned down a (albeit freezing cold) mountain bike ride (something I truly love and makes me feel alive... but sometimes that is just too hard.) with Kemp this morning, and opted instead for a cold morning walk with my dog and some yummy mid-morning Yoga with Adriene. I stumbled upon her on a yoga blog as a recommendation for home practice videos and I. LOVE. HER. She is so funny and adorable and dorky and thoughtful and her practices leave me smiling all through my savasana.  I am also joining the gym around the corner that has a mixture of “rec center”-esque classes like spinning, zumba, pilates, etc. and I have decided I am going to write and exercise my way back to endorphin-induced bliss.  Because I am stuck. I feel stuck and blah and I don’t know what else to do and the other parts of my life are so beautiful and fulfilling that I can’t let them continue to be affected by the one thing that is dragging me down. I can’t make a change in my job right now and I can’t change any of the parts of it that are overwhelming and frustrating, so instead I change my habits and hope that I continue to make it through and stay afloat. 

Those of you that have been through something similar, any tips or suggestions? 

[shemayest]

I have hardcore teacher burn out lately and it is a constant struggle to drag myself to work every morning. As soon as Monday begins, I am watching the clock for Friday and trying to wade through the bullshit each new day brings.  I have nothing but negative things to say about the profession. It terrifies me that this is where I am after only 2.5 years in the job and only 3 months at this new school. 

I just feel so. worn. out. and frustrated. and negative. and when people ask me how my new school is and how my year is going so far it is so incredibly difficult to smile through my teeth and tell them things are fine and good and I love my job!  Don’t get me wrong... I do really like my students! As always. Because hanging with teenagers is (mostly) fun and funny and enjoyable and sometimes I may even actually teach them some concept that they understand and will also forget in a year (like I did). It’s all the other things that come with it. It’s the lack of professional treatment by superiors and larger district bodies. It is the lack of value of my time and resources. It is the disrespect I feel when I have to answer to rules that feel de-humanizing and infantilizing. It is the constant and utter lack of TIME to get ANY.THING. done. and the lack of financial compensation (or hope for future financial compensation) for the time put in. I know there are perks that my job offers that other jobs don’t like vacation on holidays and summers “off” and whatever else. I know that I am so blessed and lucky to HAVE a job that pays enough to put food in my belly and roof over my head and [cute] clothes on my back.  But, I just don’t know how much longer I am going to last. Anyone have recommendations? Support? Advice? Other career/job ideas for me? 

[shemayest]

It was a day of triumph! I net and released a catch (along with tied all my flies) completely on my own. #itsthelittlethings #falldayontheriver #flyfishing

[shemayest]

Game changer.

[shemayest]

Went for a "fall drive" this weekend up near Silverton to see Clear Lake. It was so lovely and relaxing and beautiful and I'm feeling all the grateful and #blessed feels. How is this where I live now? (Technically an hour away but ...like, what???) 

 Also, Saturday is Kemper's birthday and it was such a busy week that I half forgot to order his present and now have to express ship it and worst gf award goes to me! Except not really because 1 million of his bffs are coming to town and staying at our house. So, also best gf award!! GIVE ME ALL THE AWARDS FOR ALL THE STUFF. K bye :)

[shemayest]

Every Sunday the past few weeks I have eaten breakfast and then ventured outside with my coffee to read in our hammock for an hour or two. Sometimes I fall asleep. Sometimes I just relax and watch the dog play in the grass. And it feels so, so good.

[shemayest]

That awkward moment...

when you have gained a teeny bit of weight (more like just softened.. a lot) and all your pants and favorite shirts are a leeeeeettlee bit too tight/awkward fitting but you don’t want to buy new ones because you are convinced they will fit better soon.....! And also, too poor. I NEED SOMEONE TO AWARD ME A SHOPPING SPREE for more adult tshirts and a few pairs of pants. plz and thx.  time to go work out. I am starting Blogilates’ Cassey Ho’s “New Beginners Calendar” workouts this week. I SUCK at working out in the morning. So my goal is to do two morning work outs a week and 2 evening workouts.  Has anyone ever done her videos before? What did you think? I need FITSPIRATION/Motivation.... :-/ HELP MY THIGHS AND BUTT AND HIPS WON’T STOP GROWING Whyyyyyyy does my stupid metabolism have to change now? #turning26 #feckyou

[shemayest]

Breakfast scramble and football. Eventually, I will grade some papers and prep for the week...but for now the couch and this book (The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri) are calling my sleepy Sunday name.