[frogdealer]

why are 20 yr olds so sad Are u guys ok

[sharkboykdn]

No

[bangedupprincess-deactivated202]

Help m e

[we-kant-even]

[izandai]

I wonder what the proportion is of people who reblog this because they get the reference to ancient greek philosophy versus people who reblog it because it looks a lot like your standard shitpost.

[kirkfanatic]

BEHOLD, A MEME!

[wizardshark]

This is the most accurate portrayal of Diogenes ever because of that shit eating grin on his face

[beanabouttown]

[getsawaycar]

lowkey can’t wait for there to be an especially dramatic episode of brooklyn nine nine where andy sambergs character gets shot and everyone dubs mmm whatcha say over the scene and we come full circle

[thefunnydeepandrandom]

Bold of you to assume that B99 won’t do it themselves

[parsonkenny101-deactivated20161]

[achillesvevo-deactivated2020090]

[yamitamiko]

me, holding a pizza box and shouting: SUE!

customer walks up

me: sue?

customer opens the box, frowns, and sticks her finger in the pizza: i didn’t order pepperoni

me, with a voice devoid of any emotion: ……. sue?

customer: oh! no i’m (name)!

the actual sue, materializing at my elbow: is that a pizza for sue?

me: would you like some free breadsticks to eat while we remake you pizza? another customer touched it

‘another customer’ sheepishly mumbles sorry

sue, who has clearly worked with the public: you take as long as you need to, honey

[tinyhipsterboy]

me, shouting at the top of my lungs: ICED VENTI VANILLA LATTE FOR JENNIFER

male customer standing right in front of me turns to look

me: jennifer? iced vanilla latte?

customer says nothing, takes the drink, shoves straw in, takes a long sip

customer: i wanted this hot. i ordered a small hot decaf skinny vanilla latte.

me: are you jennifer?

customer: no, i’m daniel

[pg-chan]

Some people wonder why people fight wars, but I have no trouble imagining reasons for people to just haul off on each other. 

[sherlockravenclaw]

Facebook is now pirate friendly. Reblog to scour fer mateys

[fuglyselfie]

if i sweat I'd simply use deodorant

[fuglyselfie]

rip to people on public transport but I'm different

[marxistbarbie-deactivated202109]

Guys I love my new job so much my boss is so nice we have paid breaks and can eat and drink off the menu free all day it’s iconic

[marxistbarbie-deactivated202109]

inch resting how i work for a lil independent coffee shop that isn’t a huge corporate chain and my boss is the actual owner and he like works with us doing the same shit we do, pays all his staff the london living wage (which is more than the legal minimum wage), gives us paid breaks, provides lunch and drinks all day, uses entirely fair trade + ethically sourced ingredients and still runs a super profitable business which opened two additional shops this year. it’s almost like it’s a total blatant lie that huge companies like amazon and walmart would be committing fiscal suicide if they started treating their staff like actual human beings 

[dekoi2501post]

[dangerbooze]

OH MY GOD

[zionthepansexual]

[lochnessmonsterofficial]

[maliciousindungeon]

okay, i got real fucked up last week and ordered a fuck ton of webkinz, which i thought was a mistake, until the first ones arrived and pud decided she absolutely fucking loved them

at first i just put em on her to see what shed do, which was nothing, so i decided to just leave her alone in my room for a bit. when i came back in later, she was doing this and i dead ass started crying

[maliciousindungeon]

UPDATE: another one came :'^)

[mothman-slamp]

[poseidont]

a concept: future jake and amy having a kid BUT amy goes into labour on halloween and jake has to figure out if amy is cheating him out of the heist or if he’s actually about to have a kid

[dizzybunnies]

bold of you to assume she didnt plan to get pregnant exactly 9 months before halloween so that its actually both

[mrgaretcarter]

bold of you to assume it wasnt jake who planned to get her pregnant exactly 9 months before so she’d be thrown off by contractions

[mrgaretcarter]

bold of all of us to assume Holt didn’t pick an exact date to compliment them both so they’d have validation horniness so that jake AND amy were in disadvantage during the heist

[disregardcanon]

Holt: your heteronormative lifestyle choices will bring about your demise

[loafed-beans-deactivated2020082]

I know many of you out there are feeling a bit down. Have a crow to Wouldn’t it be Nice by the Beach Boys to lift your mood.

[thedoctorknits]

He stops and looks both ways?!?

[bettsplendens]

You wanna know what makes this better?

Crows normally walk. This one seems to have both legs working, so he’s not hopping out of necessity, he’s doing it for fun. Corvids can sometimes be seen doing things like this for no evident reason other than enjoyment.

[jcgreen72]

This is my new favorite post

[dovewithscales]

I can’t ever not reblog.

[finofilipino]

[eltigrechico]

V i e w s       f r o m      3 0 3 8

[elecmon]

so my little brother is 14 years old, and is turning 15 tomorrow

his birthday is 4/20

he has no idea why all our cousins (and myself) giggle at birthday parties when i say im going to blaze it(the cake candles). even his friends are in on this they showed up 3 years ago to his party and they go “Hahaha hey pedro happy 420″ and he replied “Yea thanks thats my birthday” to which they all apparently silently simultaneously agreed to not tell him anything and are also waiting for him to figure it out on his own

He’s a freshman in high school this year and has SOMEHOW still managed to not figure this out. I wonder how he will be told tomorrow  

[elecmon]

@ anybody and everybody wondering, just came home and told him happy birthday and he took his xbox headphones off and just looked at me in the most legitimate serious face ive ever seen and said

“Did you know its national weed day?????”

[elecmon]

happy 16th birthday/national weed day jr

[elecmon]

Happy 18th birthday little dude, you are now a little man

[elecmon]

Happy 19th birthday Jr, people make this post an annual tradition apparently lmfaaooo

[elecmon]

[asknightwing]

We all better live till then to celebrate this kids insane birthday

[ddrvbiblgigb]

[garfield-baybee]

Reblog to have something good happen at 1:42 tomorrow

[blue-skies-are-alright]

I really need this…

[queensxxyycv-deactivated2024092]

please

[m-apple]

Please.

[tastefullyoffensive]

[oncesingingalways]

Quality. Content.

[buddhabrot]

the only post i care about