LEBENSMÜDE.

between me and you, i've been thinking about the future and, between me and you, i think i'm losing it now. — stefan köhler. — thirty four. — human. — brewer. — german. — part time dad.

[shutupstef]

michael-krestt‌:

As much as Michael enjoys living in Norway, he doubts he’ll ever grow accustomed to the cold. Even Emily is less energetic in such weather and tends to cry or throw a fit when she’s too cold. These days, they tend to stay in the forever warm and cozy bookstore that he owns. Michael organizing shelves and whatnot while Emily kept herself busy with coloring books or flipping through colorful magazines. Since the days are slow, he normally ends up sitting at the desk with his little girl in his lap while she does her ‘job’ of littering the desk with crude, yet cute, drawings of poorly proportioned stick animals of unnatural colors.

When the bell to the door of the shop rings, Michael looks up from the green drawing of what could be a giraffe or a horse, looking over at the newcomer. “Good evening. If you need some assistance, I’ll be with you shortly.”

The bookstore was great shelter from the cold outside, and a good excuse to get Ida out of the house before she started one of her classic temper tantrums normally stirred up from boredom. Hoping that Michael would have his daughter with him today, Stefan and Ida had practically run through the cold to the door in hopes to catch them. Coming inside, he shed his jacket in the warmth, giving Michael an easy smile. “Hey, just us. Thought we’d come stop by before grabbing dinner. What are you guys up to?”

[dailychrisevans]

Before We Go (2014) dir. Chris Evans

[shutupstef]

francescatorres‌:

“It’s overly hyped.” In her opinion, caffeine beverages were better from local cafes than a franchise. “You’re not missing out on much. I actually like the fact that Kingsholm doesn’t house any of that. It’s for the best.” She shook her head, “Nope. Disgusting with my taste buds.” Her brows arched at his comment, “Wow really? Just the other day I mentioned that I consider a local as someone who’s either born and bred or been in a place for more than four years. My assumption then is entirely wrong for this place.” She understood that it was a small town, with only very little to see. However, she was a Silver and she knew that Kingsholm brought more to the table. “I can last.” she stated with confidence. “I’ve been through worse.” It was a vague response, but she wasn’t lying. As the heiress of a notorious cartel, they’ve done things in terrible conditions that she’d experienced and seen them all. “Although, I’m more of an island girl—the cold never bothered me anyway.” she joked in a sing-song tone as she referenced the Frozen franchise. 

Tucking his lips together tightly, he began to nod slowly, as if absorbing her opinion on the spot. At least in Kingsholm, he always went to the same little cafe on the corner opposite the Brewery. The loyalty system here was more important than some big corporation. He laughed gently at her assumption, “Four years, huh? Guess that marginalizes me. Wish it felt like it.” He tucked his hands in his pockets then. Of course, in some ways, Kingsholm did feel like home to him. But in other ways... he still felt like the outsider. He had Vera to blame for that. “Oh no, not you too.” Stefan shot her a look, then started to laugh. There was no doubt that when that movie had dropped, it had been the only thing he’d had to listen to his daughter scream from the living room for months. “Well... We’re sort of an island. A big one, sharing with Sweden and Finland, a bit connected to the mainland but... you know. If you try hard to think about it that way, then you might settle faster. Just don’t be expecting any 38 degree days with margaritas on the beach, and you’re set.”

[shutupstef]

noahkohler‌:

“Dammit,” Noah hissed, shaking his head and straightened up after the failed attempt at pocketing the ball. “You know what I hate about this game?” He asked rhetorically, walking a few steps as he spoke to the person on the other side of the Pool table. “Nothing. It requires steady precision, an eye for detail and flawless strategy. Which is why I’m pissed as hell because Im quite obviously off.” He sighed. “So, then tell me. Do you also like to wallow in your troubles with a loud club and a good drink? Or are you one of the lucky ones just here for fun?” He smiled at them.

Initially, they’d started a casual meeting about the Brewery between the two of them to sort out some things earlier in the afternoon. But like always, as the sun went down, the brothers had ended up sat at a bar, four beers in, with that being the only way to settle an argument. Now, Stefan was on his phone, trying not to overhear the god-awful pickup lines spewing out of Noah like a fountain at some girl across the pool table. Finally, though, he didn’t have to anymore, as she suddenly looked up, pointed out that her boyfriend had arrived, and practically dropped Noah like a hot kranksy. Stefan wasn’t about to laugh, it was a pretty shitty thing to happen considering Noah had been at this for the better part of a half hour, but he also wasn’t feeling considerably sorry for his brother either. Looking up from his texts finally, his brows quirked. “Sounds like you have more than one skill you need to refine at the moment.”

[shutupstef]

rasmushedqvist‌:

It was late evening and a somber, quiet chatter was echoing through the open space area Rasmus had walked into out of pure boredom, as well as wanting to scout for the usual hotspots around town. Although he tried to keep his identity lowkey, whether it’d be his face or any other trait that could somehow rat him out through past mishappenings, he found it useless to spend all his time off work rolling his thumbs and praying for further income to land down his lap. Thus, when his eyes had spotted a convenient dartboard at the opposite side of the room his head hadn’t spared a minute to cook up an idea.

Nothing unusually tricky, but perhaps a little unfair as he was already set to cheat his way through the challenge he was about to propose to the person next to him. Why? Well, he was now playing with his own mentally crafted darts that rested between his fingers; ones easy for him to steer as long as he kept his mood at a neutral. It would leave him a clear advantage, and hopefully a win on top of it. “Hey, you!” Rasmus spoke up, waving to grab their attention. “Up for a game of dart for a twenty? Might as well make it interesting and I’m bored.”

Looking up from his paperwork at the small island table he’d been sitting at, second beer half-empty and not a whole lot being done, Stefan listened to the guy’s challenge. Giving out a gentle laugh, Stefan already welcomed defeat. “It’s been a long time since I’ve played with one of those.” He said, looking over at the dartboard and giving a small shake of his head. “You’re only going to be even more bored playing with me, I’m no stiff competition.”

[shutupstef]

bentenilsson‌:

Bente laughed at his question. “Well, I wouldn’t quite call them rascals. But, yeah. I have 4 brothers and they’re all inside with clients. Waiting for me to make a decision,” she shrugged. “They definitely used to be rascals, though. When we were younger. But working at a law firm has a way of taming people.”

“Four?!” He scoffed, “Poor you, wedged between all the boys.” Stefan chuckled, not able to relate to the fact. Squinting at her for a moment, he wondered if it was appropriate to ask. If it wasn’t, maybe she wouldn’t have mentioned it. “What kind of decision?”

[shutupstef]

viviansandvik‌:

She shrugs. “At my core I’m a scientist. I know certain things are true if only because it’d be scientifically impossible if they did. That’s my head talking. But there are some things I wish were true — like mermaids or Atlantis or something like that. I know logically they can’t be true, but then I can also create and bend certain existing facts to make them plausible. Hence, self inflicted a bit.” It’s a long winded explanation and by the end of it she feels as if she’s lost track of what they’d originally been talking about. “Mhmm! That’s the prison. Though I think last I heard it’s really hard to get tickets for the tours. Oh yeah? I loved science as well. Wasn’t big on math but because of the relation I had to take it. Wasn’t big on English. History was nice but a lot of it’s really depressing.”

He listened and breathed a gust of a laugh through his nose when she mentioned mermaids and Atlantis. “Yeah, well, you’re not the only one. My daughter would probably be on board with that too.” He smiled. “So you’re a scientist? Count me feeling kind of inadequate.” Stefan laughed, having only ever gone to vocational training for carpentry, giving up on business school long ago. “Oh yeah, I can understand that. Although European history is pretty rich, as they say, so I guess I didn’t mind some of it. I liked chemistry though. Almost blew me and my brother’s eyebrows off when I was fifteen just playing around with that stuff. Guess it makes sense why I went into brewing. Less explosions, but... A good result product.”

[shutupstef]

matiasxbelmonte‌:

“That’s nowhere crazy. Serial killers have fascinated humanity for centuries I’d say, they’re a real threat and one that doesn’t function between empathic laws. Or some might, but who’s to say.” By the end of the day, Matías had probably always found humans to be more terrifying than ghosts, perhaps so because of his mother’s profession and the type of people he had seen about his father’s job. One helped people heal, protected them even or wished to leave in peace – they held no quarrels with the living and most times they didn’t even know themselves to be dead. But it was a fear of the unknown and of superstition that made horror movies popular. “Have you ever noticed that most horror movies that involve real killers tend to be men attacking women? Ouch. Or thirty year old pretending to be horny teenagers. Kind of a narrow scene.” Matís knew this little peace of theirs wouldn’t last beyond either getting their orders ready, but he certainly enjoyed it while it was allowed to last. Who knew when both would be able to look the other’s way again? 

Matías had a habit of leaving Stefan behind in conversations. Not that he minded much, it just spoke volumes on the other guy’s intelligence. It just proved that he could understand what Vera saw in Matías, the both of them seemed to be on completely different planes than him. “Eh, well that’s true, not sure I can name very many Hollywood killer women. I did like that one with Charlize Theron though... I can’t remember what it’s called...” He frowned, trying to think but giving up after a moment when nothing came to him. “Of course, das Frau ohne Gesicht or you know... Heilbronner Phantom was a pretty cool case. A lady killer without a face, that’s... you have to admit, that’s pretty original.”

[elenaalvar-deactivated20200112]

[asher-bouchard-blog]

— featuring ; @shutupstef

[shutupstef]

gretalarsen‌:

Looking towards the screen, she narrowed her eyes in thought. “Hmm… I think about… 10 times at least. I know it’s been on every Halloween marathon. So I must’ve seen it a lot of times.” She looked back at him as she spoke. His question about whether or not she’d come with someone functioned as a reminder to check if her friends had arrived yet. Her eyes quickly skimmed the hall, her gaze lingering on the entrance for a couple seconds. Going to answer his question, she looked back at him with a soft smile. “A couple of my childhood friends are coming. Are you?” 

“Ten times, wow...” Stefan rose his eyebrows in shock, not having prepared for that kind of answer. Frankly, he didn’t really watch a lot of movies. He wasn’t a movie buff, per se. His ex had been though, so a lot of his movie knowledge had been because of her for a time. “Ah, makes sense. I didn’t come last year... actually, I don’t think I came the year before that either. I don’t remember when I last came since I’ve been here, maybe three years ago? Four?” He shrugged it off though, because it didn’t really matter in the end. “Oh, that’s nice. Nice that you all still keep in contact. No... No, I’m just... Well, it’s actually kind of pathetic, I’m not sure I want to admit why I’m here.”

[shutupstef]

avavaldes‌:

To imagine how entangled withe Köhler and Valdes family and ever imagining the separation like this happening was something Ava never dawned in her years to experience. But, it happened. Just like countless amount of misfortunes happened for the sisters. Regardless, she knew what went down between the pairing from having spent endless amount of time with her sister. The most Ava could do was be cordial with her nieces’s father. In a way, they were still family and bonded by Ida’s appearance in each one of their lives. She wondered what Stefan had been doing beside the Brewery, which she learned about from running into Noah nearly a month ago, but after that, it was wandering thoughts and figured it didn’t kill her to talk to him briefly before the movies start. “Man, I guess it happens sometimes. But, ssshh, don’t tell anyone, I got a reputation to withhold at work,” her tone naturally danced into a joke, a shrug lifting toward her ears. “Every once in a moment, I turn a corner and I see a kid with their mothers phone, fingers tapping away at the screen as if it’s their only source of distraction or happiness. I can only imagine how future generations will grow up. We used to run outside and appreciate those jungle gyms. Now? I swear I hardly see kids on them.”

Stefan gave a long and heavy sigh, looking out at the crowds of couples, kids, and families. He nodded slowly, agreeing with her that it was definitely a different era now and in some ways, it was terrifying to watch. “It’s all different now then when we were kids, that’s for sure.” He admitted, hands on his pockets, trying to not look as if they were in some deep and heavy conversation, should anybody see them together. “Ida loves her Netflix, but thank god I can’t afford an iPad.” He didn’t dare mention the fact that he knew Vera had one though, or that Ida practically had her own everything at her mother’s house, even an Instagram presence which he highly disapproved of but could argue forever with Vera who refused to relent. “Maybe one day the Internet will go dark and we won't have anything but the jungle gyms left.”

[shutupstef]

francescatorres‌:

“Starbucks. They make a profit out of it when autumn arrives.” replied Francesca with a sigh. Nothing like conscious capitalism from the siren logo corporation. “Every year it still amazes me people would invest in that…crap.” For a lack of a better word, it was simply that when it came to her taste buds. “Well that’s good to hear. At least it’s making progress every year. I can tell that the community of Kingsholm seem to enjoy it, children especially.” At his assumption, she nodded to confirm and said, “Yup, I’ve been here for two months actually. I was definitely curious to see how Halloween’s like in Norway. Not as intense as it is in America, but I prefer it that way.” 

“Ah. I see... I’ve never been there. I used to see them back home in München, though.” He admitted with a frown, wondering where the closest one might be to them here. Perhaps in Oslo, or a bigger city than Kingsholm, anyway. If the town had one, he didn’t know about it. “Not a fan, then?” He chuckled, assuming by her description of the drink. “Two months, huh? You’re practically a local now. Though, most new people discover in the first six weeks whether or not this part of the world is for them. Especially during the winter. Do you think you’ll last?”

[shutupstef]

matiasxbelmonte‌:

Matías arched a brow as he listened in on Stefan’s answer, scoffing softly as heard that overly familiar part of being a skeptic. Perhaps one of few things he had shared with Vera. Not being someone who could relate to romantic matters, he had mostly stayed on the sidelines when it came to their relationship, watching a written fairytale go up in flames in a matter of months and placed his sympathies where they mattered. That, being Vera. However, that didn’t necessarily mean had to stop caring just because the two had ventured their own ways. “You don’t have to believe something to enjoy it. Natalie is all into fantasy, but that doesn’t mean she believes dragons are real. She just enjoys it for what it is.” Being a skeptic had never stopped Matías from enjoying movies, although that could be the reason he preferred thrillers above horror – one more real than the other. “But what about horror movies without supernatural elements to them? I know a few of them to exist.” 

The was such an artist’s reply, Stefan wanted to punch him. Not really, not in the way he might want to punch someone he actually hated, but in the way he often would head-lock Noah and rub his knuckles into his skull until he begged for mercy. Matías was pensive, and he was a deep-thinker. Two things Stefan didn’t really consider himself to be, he was very literal, stupid even. Or so he believed. Give him the materials and he could build a home, but ask him to dream up something unusual and he wouldn’t even get beyond the first Once upon a time. “Well, sure. I like serial killers. I mean, that might make me sound like a crazy person, but it’s more believable to me than something crawling out of a TV screen or a haunted house. Psycho... The Shining... this stuff, I like.”

[shutupstef]

portermaduro‌:

“It’s awful,” he mumbled in disgust, instantly putting his own cup down as far away as possible. It must’ve been the spice adding a horrifying kick to the pumpkin mixture which made Porter want to gag and never try anything new ever again. “I am with you on that motion. I’ll leave the new crazes for the young kids. Heaven knows they found the excuse to ruin the purpose of Tide Pods. Anyway, not point but an example,” he shrugged it off, even waving a hand before hues darted toward the screaming and the jumping. He didn’t have an initial response but kids were all over the grounds tonight, coming left and right for snacks for the upcoming list of films soon to be broadcasted. “And for a quick second, I thought I was going to be the odd man out for thinking like such and still showing up to these nights.” Well, he visited before he dipped and dashed.

Stefan laughed, though over a spoon of pumpkin soup so he had to contain it to something cordial. Kids were and always would be stupid, it seemed. He felt like by now it was just a right of passage most had to go through. “Yeah, well... there’s got to be a few of us old guys around to make sure the wise stories get told. Otherwise, how are we going to pass on our wisdom?” He joked, making himself comfortable at the tabletop. “Anyway, I figured Noah might want a ride home. Plus, not that I’m looking to run into them but... if Ida escapes her mom’s clutches for two seconds, I’m hoping it might be to see me. A guy can hope.”

[shutupstef]

francescatorres‌:

Francesca wasn’t one for festivities, let alone a movie marathon. However, she was in a completely new setting that it didn’t hurt to get involved.  Looking at the array of treats that the event had to offer, this definitely worked out in her favour since she totally had a sweet tooth. Before she could pick up what she wanted, a voice interrupted her thoughts as she glanced over and listened. “The pumpkin spice latte is all the craze world wide, but at the same time it’s also considered basic.” Reaching for a cupcake, she munched on it and nodded in agreement, “Not a fan of drinking pumpkin to begin with, so you’re not the only one who isn’t a fan.” Pointing in the direction of the theatre, Frankie chuckled softly and added, “Same. I only came here to see what the hype is about. Although, I find it cute how this town comes together. Does this usually happen every year?”  

“Is it? I haven’t really heard of it until, I think, maybe last year? Even then, I don’t remember where it was. Maybe online.” Stefan thought to himself, frowning at the fact. He also hadn’t realised he’d called it the wrong thing until just now when she talked about it. He cursed his English silently. Smiling though when she talked about the town coming together, Stefan gave a gentle laugh. “From what I’ve seen since I moved here, it’s getting bigger and bigger every year. I wouldn’t say the whole of Kingsholm is involved but... they’re trying to make it an event for everyone, I think.” He told her, stirring his soup around. “New to town then? You sure picked a good time.”

[shutupstef]

nina-valdes‌:

“What, you don’t totally like, a pumpkin spiced latte? That’s like, crazy,” Nina attempted her best impression of preppy teenager girl, before flashing a grin at him. “I mean — they’re trying to add pumpkin into everything nowadays, that, I can definitely pass on,” She commented, before a brow raised at Stefan’s comment, although he didn’t really give her time to say anything before he continued, laughing slightly when he finished. “Hey, I wasn’t going to question your manliness whether you like scary movies or not,” She said, holding her hands up in mock defeat. “But, you still came to the movie marathon anyway. Did you come here with a…friend or something? Since I think Vera has Ida tonight.”

Stefan made a face at Nina, one that said he not only found the impersonation hilarious but also hilariously awful. Trying not to laugh too much, he shook his head and went back to his soup. “Oh good, okay, I just... Because I just wanted to make that known.” He told her with a grin. Glancing over the crowd in the hall, he sighed. “Would that be a surprise? I do have friends, you know. A few, anyway.” He mocked back. “But no, I figured I’d offer to be my brother’s designated driver. Surely he and his friends will get up to something he needs a ride home from at some point. As for V... That’s kind of the real reason I’m sitting over here instead of watching the movies. So what’s your excuse? Same thing?” He teased.

[shutupstef]

avavaldes‌:

A voice all too familiar rang in her ears causing Ava to sigh softly before diverting her hues toward her sister’s ex as brows tightly furrowed. Racking the back of her mind in attempt to wonder when was the last time she saw him or even spoken to him. Point was mute as she remained silent listening toward each of his words. “I don’t know. No one is ever too old for new crazes, at least how I feel. But if that’s how you feel,” she finally spoke up in a calm state, a careless shrug rolling off her shoulders. Hues forcefully pulling themselves to the screaming and the jumping, her mouth corners twisted downward. “Really?” She spoke, stunned. There wasn’t much Ava felt like she knew about Stefan.  “I don’t know… The Conjuring jump scares still surprise me each time I watch it. The young kids are braver than me because they didn’t even flinch last year. Anyway, that’s the movie expectation only though.”

While Stefan never really made it a point to entangle himself in Valdes affairs anymore ( even though once upon a time, he’d been very proactive about getting her family to like him ) he wasn’t the type to completely turn a blind eye should he ever happen across Ava or Nina, or worse, one of their parents. He was friendly, cordial even, or so Stefan liked to think. Of course, the hint of a busted lip from last weekend with one of Vera’s ex friends told a different story, but hopefully Ava hadn’t heard about that just yet. “Sounds like you’re letting yourself got soft,” He tried to make for a gentle joke, hoping not to piss her off by any measure. Especially when he knew Vera was in the vicinity somewhere, likely ready to assault him should he even look at Ava wrong. “I’m finding that kids aren’t so sensitive these days. They grew up with the Internet and TV, violence and jump scares are like a joke to some of them. It’s crazy, if you ask me.”