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[sickdogz]

hi everyone! my name is moth and this is my chronic illness blog for things that are a bit too personal for main. you can ask for my main if we are buddies 🫶. i use xe/xyr and i am an adult!

i'm diagnosed with narcolepsy and other things however the narcolepsy will probably be what i blog about most! if you have any questions my dms and askbox are open as long as you're respectful about it.

url is a reference to the song sick dogs by hey, nothing. give it a listen^_^

[illi-tism]

does anyone else’s moral ocd manifest in the form of you scrutinizing the way that YOU feel about pieces of media, e.g. you really enjoyed something but you see other people saying they disliked it for reasons x and y, and you suddenly feel you have to justify to YOURSELF in your own head WHY you liked it and WHY it’s okay that you liked it and yet still feeling like for some reason your opinion and their opinion can’t coexist because you simply MUST be wrong and therefore a bad person and also stupid. or is it just me

[aesungaia]

Everyone's Friend

[comstelic]

denial

[lapi5lazuli]

thoughts that make you feel like a bad person

[aesungaia]

[fagstaynight]

no sir, i’m not plural. sir, it is a mystical technique taught to me by my ancient forefathers to protect me against psychic invaders. my mind has been splintered and compartmentalized in order to confound any and all supernatural perversion. any other suggested cause is purely hearsay. i must reiterate, sir, it is only by coincidence that one of my many facets seems to resemble this gentleman “David Strider” you seem utterly convinced I’m familiar with. Surely, it must be the will of some divine providence that smiles upon the both of us.

[sickdogz]

thinking about the time i had some kind of infection (ear infection or something) where i had to get medication every day or whatever but it was in pills and i physically couldn't swallow pills (i was probably 10 at the oldest) so my mom would break the pill open and tip it over my mouth and i'd somehow swallow the powder inside very quickly so i didn't taste it (or something adjacent) (doctor said this was fine) but one morning my stepdad tried to do it and somehow broke the pill wrong and got the medicinal powder all over my face and in my eyes and what did get in my mouth tasted terrible and i almost choked on it. Most medically competent stepdad moment

[crazysodomite]

guy who only experienced torture: this reminds me of the torture i went through

guy who only experienced torture: i don't like this because it's too unlike the torture

guy who only experienced torture: i'm afraid of not being tortured

[feluka]

guy with depression: idk stories about time loops just kinda really resonate with me haha idk why

[feluka]

guy with depression: it's so sad when they're doing the same thing over and over again insisting this time it'll be different. it sure would suck if time loops were real!

[sickdogz]

my brain is genuinely fascinating in the kind of scenarios it can construct. in the fun way and also in the way that i just imagined a universe in which i write something about lovelace dealing with a knee pain flare up and it being cute minlace or whatever and then someone in the comments of the fic and/or wolf 359 fandom as a whole gets upset with me for improper betrayal of disability and/or the writing being vague and the pain not being connected to a specific disability or condition and/or fetishizing disability and therefore i'm being ableist somehow to which i would sit there and post "i don't know what condition she has other than Vague Knee Issues because my doctor won't tell me what's wrong with My knee and that's where this idea came from. if you have ideas and want to diagnose me though then go ahead" and that's where my mind stopped. This is such a nothing post. anyway my knee hurt bad the other day and i miss lovelace and i should write about it

[sickdogz]

i'm probably some kind of plural but i don't quite know how to talk about it and i have a biiiiig assignment due soon so let's just focus on that for now

[natalieironside]

Due to my weird childhood and my weird brain, I have this very unhelpful compulsion to conceal Everything I do from Everyone. I Cannot be observed performing any action, no matter how mundane. My nervous system is convinced I'm gonna, like, Get In Trouble for eating food at dinnertime or sleeping in my bed at bedtime.

I've taken to asking myself, "Okay does this task actually require subterfuge or am I stealing a balloon on Free Balloon Day"

[natalieironside]

I see from the notes that we're all havin a normal one 👍

[scramratz]

[wizardarchetypes]

OCD is just coming up with insane fanfiction about yourself in your own head and getting really really scared even though you literally just made it up. you're making breakfast and your brain is like "okay I headcanon that I secretly want to run someone over with a car and that I have colon cancer." and you're like ohhh my goooddd that could be true [3 hour panic attack]

[nullapophenia]

(this is a piece about disability, and always being too tired or in pain to do anything, no matter how badly you want it. looking on at the people and things you love and just not being able to join in, a perpetual "maybe tomorrow". i will almost never be able to do anything beyond a certain threshold, and neither will so many others.)

[sickdogz]

sometimes hera is like my own personal Truman show