three goblins in a trenchcoat

aaron • late 20s • he/him

[blackshvck]

the idea that every summer will be as hot if not hotter than this for the rest of my life is unbearable i need to (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) murder an oil executive

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

hearing anything about the nolan odyssey is so funny. it's like "they cut the extremely important and infamous nobody scene" "the cyclops is a giant puppet that they put in an actual historical cave + gave circe animatronics for her pig transformation instead of cgi" "they dumped plastic skeletons in an environmentally protected location they were not supposed to be in" "they recreated ancient greek instruments in order to have an accurate score" "all of odysseus's agency is basically gone" "anne hathaway actually learned how to weave ancient looms" "the women in this movie are treated like shit" "they actually buried actors alive to get those underworld shots" "did you see what the fuck zendaya was fucking wearing holy shit you can't DO THAT, MA'AM" "what do you mean there was a legitimate epic the musical reference" "NOT A SINGLE FUCKING GREEK WAS CAST IN THIS MOVIE"

like did nolan have two guys standing at his side at all times whispering ideas in his ear and one told the truth and the other told lies and they didnt tell him which was which until they wrapped production cause

[mistress-light]

Titanic (1997) • Deleted scenes 'The Gymnasium'

[grimmghosts]

every business owner at my local city council meetings ever like

[quinn-of-aebradore]

I love City Council of Darkness cause you have Brennan being like “I have absolutely no way to honor you guys succeeding there because of how insane you proceeded to act” and then ten minutes later he shows up with something equally insane but then it swings back around to Zac saying “I don’t read. I get mad that the letters don’t do other things,” which causes Brennan to make this face;

Like the Intrepid Heroes are On Some Shit no matter what campaign they’re in, but I swear to god, the coterie has unlocked a new level of unhinged in them. There is no straight man in this party. Every single one of them is doing loop-de-loops in a Bingo-Dingo bus around this town but also none of them are at the wheel and the buses are diving headfirst off the starwalk into the quarry.

[quantummoonjune]

hot new reaction image just dropped

[cyphir-spacerobot]

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

[asymptotic-rage]

Imagine being Tyler.

Your bosses are super toxic. They pay for your grandpa to leave his terrible housing. They tell you to work 17 hours a day. They immediately give you a promotion. You've never seen them in the daytime and they think lunch happens at 8pm.

[exhaustedlyqueer]

Their one friend who's always wearing a denim vest with no shirt and suddenly has a horse following him around at all times has a weird vendetta against you for seemingly no reason

[ifyouknowmeirlgoaway]

They've given you two antique Rolexes.

[not-a-smartass-just-a-nerd]

you are not allowed to cry. their hot, french friend points out that you need to wear a tie. at one point, they ask you to spend several hours driving multiple buses to an empty lot. you will never not be wearing a tie ever again.

[azalea-blooming]

you drink blood straight from one of their hands and it gets you so high you punch through a brick wall. immediately after this, they have you escort patty babcock (21 year old college student they have been obsessed with for months and ordered two food trucks for) to them for a meeting. when they dismiss you, you’re still so high that you jump thirty feet straight on the air and sprint out a window.

[ohmovie]

What can I do? The only thing I'm good for is getting caught. - But you never let that stop you before. And if that's not a true hero, then I don't know what is.

FRED JONES & DAPHNE BLAKE Scooby-Doo│2002

[clownboybebop]

*street shot of zohran mamdani clad in nasty lil suit and hard hat* five months ago i was elected mayor of new york city. in that time, we have managed to COMPLETELY defeat the Staten Island Minotaur at no additional cost to the new york taxpayer

[kingcho]

Put this in the comments but it needs to be said here too. I am so mad D20 did unsleeping city before Mamdani was mayor. Can you fucking imagine.

[atlantidea]

THE OTHER BENNET SISTER (2026)

[woodsdyke]

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

[bioloyg]

HJ having almost negative rizz, MECHANICALLY, is maybe the funniest shit. Because it means his unsettling weirdo vampire swag is what won LaVonte over. That vampiric intensity and hunger. LaVonte looked at that and went, “forever sounds cool, let me do the talking though.”

And they were roommates

[philcollinsenjoyer]

explained to an 8 year old that once a fruit is ripe you only have so much time until it rots so you have to eat it soon and she said so i'll never be able to keep it perfect like this forever? no and there are about a million pieces of art for you unrelatedly

[dont-tell-my-mom-im-here]

"If you want to do ceramics I will build around your ceramics room" was kind of a crazy gay line to be followed by "I just really thought that clown would be my girlfriend"

[jabberwick]

IM NOT A PERVERT!!!!!!!! Darkness Man bc im already rewatching CCOD

[paverics]

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

[paverics]

comedians can only dream of writing something this funny