self-editing for fiction writers
Showing vs Telling
Do you have any narrative summary, or are you bouncing from scene to scene without pausing for breath?
Characterization & Exposition
What information do your readers need in order to understand your story? At what point in the story do they need to know it?
How are you getting this info across to your readers? Is it all at once through a writer-to-reader lecture?
If exposition comes out through dialogue, is it through dialogue your characters would actually speak even if your readers didn’t have to know the information? In other words, does the dialogue exist only to put the information across?
Point of View
Look at your descriptions. Can you tell how your viewpoint character feels about what you’re describing?
Proportion
Look at descriptions. Are the details you give the ones your viewpoint character would notice?
Reread your first fifty pages, paying attention to what you spend your time on. Are the characters you develop most fully important to the ending? Do you use the locations you develop in detail later in the story? Do any of the characters play a surprising role in the ending? Could readers guess this from the amount of time you spend on them?
Dialogue
Can you get rid of some of your speaker attributions entirely? Try replacing some with beats.
How often have you paragrapher your dialogue?Try paragraphing a little more often.
See How it Sounds
Read your dialogue aloud. At some point, read aloud every word you write.
Be on the lookout for places where you are tempted to change the wording.
How well do your characters understand each other? Do they ever mislead on another? Any outright lies?
Interior Monologue
First, how much interior monologue do you have? If you seem to have a lot, check to see whether some is actually dialogue description in disguise. Are you using interior monologue to show things that should be told?
Do you have thinker attributions you should get rid of (by recasting into 3rd person, by setting the interior monologue off in its own paragraph or in italics, or by simply dropping the attribution)
Do your mechanics match your narrative distance?(Thinker attributions, italics, first person when your narrative is in third?)
Easy Beats
How many beats do you have? How often do you interrupt your dialogue?
What are your beats describing? Familiar every day actions, such as dialling a telephone or buying groceries? How often do you repeat a beat? Are your characters always looking out of windows or lighting cigarettes?
Do your beats help illuminate your characters? Are they individual or general actions anyone might do under just about any circumstances?
Do your beats fit the rhythm of your dialogue? Read it aloud and find out
Breaking up is easy to do
Look for white space. How much is there? Do you have paragraphs that go on as much as a page in length?
Do you have scenes with NO longer paragraphs? Remember what you’re after is the right balance.
Have your characters made little speeches to one another?
If you’re writing a novel, are all your scenes or chapters exactly the same length? -> brief scenes or chapters can give you more control over your story. They can add to your story’s tension. Longer chapters can give it a more leisurely feels. If scene or chapter length remains steady while the tension of the story varies considerably, your are passing up the chance to reinforce the tension.
Once is usually enough
Reread your manuscript, keeping in mind what you are trying to do with each paragraph–what character point you’re trying to establish, what sort of mood you’re trying to create, what background you’re trying to suggest. In how many different ways are you accomplishing each of these ends?
If more than one way, try reading the passage without the weakest approach and see if it itsn’t more effective.
How about on a chapter level? Do you have more than one chapter that accomplishes the same thing?
Is there a plot device or stylistic effect you are particularly pleased with? How often do you use it?
Keep on the lookout for unintentional word repeats. The more striking a word or phrase is, the more jarring it will be if repeated
Sophistication
How many -ing and as phrases do you write? The only ones that count are the ones that place a bit of action in a subordinate clause
How about -ly adverbs?
Do you have a lot of short sentences, both within your dialogue and within your description and narration? Try stringing some of them together with commas
