hello im out of the mental hospital will hit yall with some stories soon
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Janaina Medeiros
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if i look back, i am lost
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@sincerely-zc
hello im out of the mental hospital will hit yall with some stories soon
Never talk about love or alcohol to a bartender. They’ll make you feel like you’ve never really experienced either. Because there’s a liquor for every sort of love. And I guess I should’ve realized it wouldn’t work. When you told me that rum makes you sick, and I can’t stomach bourbon.
Z 2/12/16 (via theonewhodevourswords)
When I undress in front of the mirror my eyes always drift towards the scar that disturbs the otherwise unblemished skin of my upper thigh, too straight to be natural. Absentmindedly I let my fingers trace its slightly puckered outline. Some days, it still looks red and angry as if it wasn’t months ago but yesterday. I still remember the clinical calm as I searched for an object sharp enough. I still remember the exact pressure it took and the color that ran while I watched. And I still remember (I won’t ever forget) the look on your face as I stripped off my clothes forgetting that it wasn’t months ago but yesterday.
Z 2/13/16
no, it’s not pretty
(via theonewhodevourswords)
i was never as strong as i was when i met you. i was never as weak as i was when you left.
reasons why loving you was wrong #11
I just want to say that i love your poetry ♡
aw thank you💘
i wrote too many poems about the last boy i loved, and i think my inspiration walked out when he did.
reasons why loving you was wrong #10
break my heart. lets build a love story, so i can rewrite it as a tragedy. break me down. make me love like i havent been able to in years. give me something to write about, so i can be real, interesting, something else, someone meaningful.
z.c.
Dear January, It is a new year, but I still awake with one sock missing. It is like my feet have been sifting all moments crumbled in my terrain of fear. I still have to put on an alarm to remind me to take my meds, but no longer one begging me to leave my bed. And I thought I would cry yesterday, but instead you slipped me back into a laugh, my mind had already displaced. January, I finally know what comes next; provided I still have breath, and my clumsiness, and my overly chatty imagination, and this gem of self-help: Fear is neither a vein nor a thread, it is an inhale - breathe and watch as you blow it away.
Dear January // Wendy Perez (via willfulwendywonders)
we met in the winter, i adored you. through the winter, you adored me. i fell in love with you by the spring, but i didn’t tell you through the spring. soon summer came, and i loved you through the summer, and i told you in july. you said you loved me too, but by the fall you didnt love me anymore. we met in the winter, and it’s the winter again. i’ve loved you through 4 seasons but you could only love me for 1.
z.c.
Meet Me On The 50 Yard Line
late night phone call from a friend asking me to join him to lay down in the middle of the football field and just think it’s the only place on campus this quiet the only place the light doesn’t block the stars so we sat arms crossed around our knees we didn’t talk much soaked in the emptiness the stadium seemed so big then but, we owned it it was electric I could have ran up to the top bleacher, thrown my hands in the air, yelled and screamed I didn’t though instead I laid down on the grass wishing I’d sink into the ground we stumbled up the stairs to the press box shared a smoke and a conversation talked about how alone we felt talked about how fucked up we we’re we laughed, we smiled our cigarettes burned out and we hugged, calling it night he went right and I went left we haven’t talked about it since the world stopped for me at three in the morning on that field and I’ll go back there one day and see if it happens again
holy shit this is amazing
you taught me that i could be attached to something i never had. now i write about us, to keep us alive, as if i miss you… like there ever really was an ‘us’. we’re just a beginning that never saw the light of day… we’re a so close yet so far, an almost but not quite. we are only what we could’ve been.
unrequited // theseareallmywords (via theseareallmywords)
your initials are still carved into my arms and legs and i want to let him kiss my scars but i dont want to feel someone else’s lips on a place that i claimed to be yours. i can still feel the way my skin has healed and anyone can see your name when i wear shorts but i cant let anyone touch me the way you did. i cant let anyone touch my scars the way i do. and i know you want to see me again, but i cant let you see what i did to myself because of you.
z.c.
i forgot how to love back in 9th grade, back when me and my girlfriend both wanted to die more than we wanted eachother to live.
-z.c.
im kind of manipulative. very manipulative, actually. i know how to get what i want; who i want. i mean, i got you back, didnt i?
reasons why loving you was wrong #7 (via sincerely-zc)
I enjoyed this piece so much I wanted to keep it going👇
“im kind of manipulative. very manipulative, actually. i know how to get what i want; who i want. i mean, i got your back, didnt i?” Held you down when the current got to rough didn’t I? Kinda feel like I got you and you got me type love. An eye for an eye I’ll wait for you type of love. I’ve seen you slowly lose yourself, that depression dug deep. I help build your confidence back up I’m kinda manipulative. A stutter in her walk had runway appeal which was very manipulative . Unless communication never voiced its opinion then nothing was never mentioned. I got your back didn’t? I Never put one before you but gossip played and laid with your conscience For our story dressed itself in nonsense As you became easy to manipulate.
(via bjhendo)
i am a scorpio. the stars say a scorpio is most compatible with a cancer. my boyfriend is a scorpio. and im in love with a cancer.
reasons why loving you was wrong #9
i am recovering. i am taking my ocean filled lungs & replacing them with star filled eyes. i am putting a bandaid on my scars & taking control. i am recovering. i am okay.
(via sincerely-zc)