riddle me this batman. are you mad at me
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@sirenyor
riddle me this batman. are you mad at me
remembering you have organs inside of you is so sickening like man i do NOT need to be fully aware of the fact that like. my appendix is just IN there. doing fuck all
jinxed myself with this one bc my appendix decided Brother, Iām Going To Start Doing Something (Today) and now itās gotta come out
You got what you wanted
booty shorts that say this on the ass
Tomorrow is pride month give queer ppl good things
Like a million dollars
there needs to be an easier way to convey the idea of "it's absolutely fine that you don't like this thing I like, and I don't even necessarily disagree with your reasons for disliking it, but I am sick to death of hearing your negative opinions about it."
op what you just said is 1000% perfect thatās exactly how you say it
do you ever think about those friend-for-an-hour strangers that you only met because you ended up in a weird situation with them?
thats growth
white people go like āis anyone going to redesign this nonhuman evil character as a poc?ā and not wait for an answer
white people go āis anyone going to redesign this nonhuman good character as a white person?ā and not wait for an answer
white people can rb but please do not clown
white people really cant give a shit abt anyone but themselves unless held at gunpoint or smth huh?
āwhat about the poor little white kids just trying to have fun?ā what about the poor little kids of color made to feel unsafe and unwelcome in a space that was supposed to be fun?
āwhy canāt poc just make their own redesigns and we can keep these onesā why cant you realize that your actions have consequences and that you should maybe try to not enforce racist stereotypes??
like ofc its ideal to have VARIETY among both villains AND protagonists, its when your characters look like this
that the issue arises
scratch ācanā, white people are encouraged to reblog
Disabled children deserve to see themselves in every genre, in every setting, not as the victim, not as a morality pet, not as a reminder of horror, of tragedy, but as a character, weāre allowed to be characters
itās sometimes hard to believe rasputin was real. like thereās no non-fucked up part of rasputinās existence
did he do something problematic i thought he was just russiaās greatest love machine
basic (true) story: fanatical russian monk who has almost never shaved or washed and smells like goats shows up at the russian capital with a creepy look on his beardy face and everyone just assumes heās a prophet or a saint because heās got a cult following that believes he can cure illnesses. his stans are sexually obsessed with him and he gets just a fuckton of russian pussy wherever he goes cause apparently he can cure his true believers of illness with god-given dick magic. russiaās queen has him come stay at the palace and sets him up in luxury because she thinks he can cure her sonās haemophilia with the power of russian goat jesus, and they (allegedly) become lovers, probably, ācause she craves that unwashed goat-scented dick like the rest of his cult which she nowĀ (allegedly) belongs to.Ā
then the worst assassins in the history of assassinations try to assassinate him, because all of russia is slutshaming the queenĀ he has too much power over the royal family and itās helping revolutionaries turn people against the royals. so these idiots have him round for tea and cakes which are poisoned with cyanide, but he is magically unaffected by poison they get the dose wrong and he doesnāt die, and then he drinks three glasses of wine, which are also poisoned, and he doesnāt die, so they tell him to look at a crucifix and shoot him in the chest with a revolver when he isnāt looking, and he doesnāt die, but they think heās dead so one of them dresses in his clothes and gets driven to his apartment to make it look like heās gone home to hide the crime, and when they come back he gets up and attacks them, so they stab him in the side with a knife, and he doesnāt die, and then he frees himself and runs outside, so they shoot him a few times more, including in the forehead, and they wrap his body up and chuck him in the icy river, and he doesnāt go into the water, so his body is found on the ice the next day. and get thisā¦. he diedā¦. of hypothermia.
additionally, everyone who wasnt in the party of getting rid of rasputin was pretty bummed out when they found him and his miracle dick dead the next day and there was a pretty bangin funeral of which the royal family themselves attended. however after the tsar was overthrown a few month later they exhumed his body and burned it because the new leadership was very adamant about making sure there were no ties left to honor the old monarchy. however this dudes body had never been properly prepped for a cremation which meant that under the extreme heat his tendons and ligaments began to retract and shrink causing his dead body to move and twitch around as if still animate. according to some testimony his body actually sat up straight on the pyre, and at least one spectator fired a gun at the body and another may have allegedly died of shock.
op was right. thereās no non-fucked up part of this dudeās existence. even his second funeral was fucked
Iām still reeling over the fact when I went with my friend to a renaissance fair, there was a lady who was handing out samples. My friend took a bite of it and all I heard was
āMy lord thatās soapā
| Thatāsā¦. not how that works
This woman deserves an oscar
same energy
Transcript:
Person in scrubs: This was a conversation I had while working at a retail pharmacy.
Person in scrubs: Hi maāam, how can I help you today?
Customer: [rude, sounding bored] I need to refill my birth control.
Scrubs: Sure, let me check on that. Hm, it looks like youāre a little early. Did the doctor change the way youāre taking it?
Customer: [snidely] No, he told me exactly how to take it and thatās exactly how Iām taking it.
Scrubs: Okay, why donāt you tell me how youāre taking it, and Iāll make sure we wrote the correct directions the first time.
Customer: [rudely] I take one every morning at 8 AM, and so does my boyfriend.
Scrubs: [long pause, blinking] What?
I am shrieking with laughter but only because if I donāt laugh I will burst into tears.Ā
i'm ready
you put that back in your mouth we're on a prophesy boycott untill shit get sorted or untill people start prophesying something more pleasant
me in five years when i still donāt have my life together: