Snowflakes that Stay on my Nose and Eyelashes
@mustardtan , guess who your Secret Santa is? Merry ChrismasI tried my hand at fic writing which I know is everyone’s least favorite words to hear but I promise I’ve written things before. You asked for fluff and Kuon slipping through the cracks of Ren, so I thought this was a good mix! It’s 4000 words of hidden meanings. I hope you enjoy!
They let the president host another Grateful Party, which in retrospect wasn’t the brightest idea. Sure, every star with merit was there and the food was lavish, but snake.
It was going so well, it was almost midnight and most of the guests were dancing merrily amongst themselves while others were thanked or greeted warmly. Ren had just reached Kyoko at the food table when they heard a high pitched wail somewhere close to the live reindeer. The president brought his pet snake against many protests, but the man had knitted the thing a sweater, dammit, it was going to happen. The snake, Sir Cornelius Slitherton, was supposed to remain around the president’s neck, and he did so for most of the night, thoroughly terrifying the guests. Apparently, that plan didn’t work because one shriek turned into a collective scream and scramble of feet.
Ren and Kyoko looked on in complete horror as Sir Slitherton made his way to the deer attached to a red sleigh. The animals bucked against their restraints and took off, fake Santa and several small children in tow. They broke free from their golden ties and ran into the crowd, who was also running. Spooked deer are not a force to be reckoned with. Santa was relieved that the sleigh stopped moving but the kids were mortified, not from the movement or the snake, but the fake antlers slipping from the “reindeer’s” ears. Meanwhile, the president could be spotted running after the snake, crouched down and singing something in Arabic.
Some of the staff were able to put themselves together enough to direct the flailing crowd to the doors, effectively turning mass running in random directions to mass running in a singular direction. The deer bolted out the doors along with the spooked guests. Just as the president caught the reptile, triumphantly at that, the guests had all cleared out, leaving nothing but turned over tables, discarded food, confetti, some deer excretions, and a flabbergasted Kyoko and Ren. The two actors remained glued to their spot, having been a ways away from the action. Kyoko is the first one to move, walking forward to pick up some trash. Ren moves next, taking the trash from her hands. He looks sternly at her and says, “It’s your birthday Mogami-san, there are others to clean up.”
Kyoko points at the clock, the minute hand not quite at the ten.
"It’s not my birthday yet,” she says and proceeds to bend down for some trampled napkins.
He sighs and says in resignation, “Fine, but the second the clock strikes twelve, I’m taking you home.”
She nods and returns to work. The Daruma couple were planning on coming later, stating that they’re old and can’t handle that much wild. It’s a good thing they didn’t come earlier, she thinks.
Ren’s beside her silently working as well. In the background they hear Sebastian with a crate trying to take Sir Slitherton away from the president. The president argues that "Noodles” didn’t do anything wrong, and that “he was just curious!”
The two actors chuckle to themselves eavesdropping on the heated debate. Maria comes up soon and joins Sebastian in the great snake debacle, being the voice of the team and yelling passionately.
The two had hardly made a dent in the mess when a large chime vibrates through the ballroom, with balloons dropping from the ceiling. Ren looks to Kyoko and she takes that as her cue to get up. They wade through the sea of balloons until they reach the president who muses over how he “forgot about that.”
Needless to say, the president was also shocked to see that Kyoko and Ren were still there.
He hands ‘Noodles’ over to Sebastian quickly and gives Kyoko a tight hug. It’s warm and fatherly, something she dreamt about, but never thought she’d have. When he pulls away, he’s quick to apologize.
“Oh, Kyoko dear, I’m so sorry I ruined your party. You’re eighteen, an adult now! What a horrible way to start it off. It should be filled with love and joy.”
Despite the recent events, she looks up with a genuine smile. It warms his heart.
“Don’t worry, it still is full of love. You’re still here, aren’t you?” She thinks he tears up a bit, but can’t really tell when Maria slams into her, full throttle, with a hug.
“You’ve got me too, big sis!”, she yells excitedly. With tears welling up, Kyoko looks down fondly at the girl.
Ren stands in the background, knowing now what he’s grateful for.
Eventually the party parts, saying their goodbyes and one promise for another party to make up for “this disaster.” She laughs and waves the president off, claiming that one is enough to last a year.
Ren presents an arm to her, suggesting that he wants her to take hold of it. His face is insisting enough and the president is no doubt watching intently, so she takes hold with only a blush in protest. The two walk like that to the door, Ren leaning down only slightly so Kyoko wouldn’t have to walk on her toes. When they’re close enough to the door to see out of it, Kyoko’s eyes go wide and she takes off towards it, leaving Ren in the dust. She makes it there in record time considering the heels she’s wearing and aggressively pushes on the glass to open it. She steps outside in wonder, looking animatedly and the glistening flakes floating down. She takes one step, and then two more, and looks back for Ren, grin splitting her face in two. It’s the most beautiful thing he thinks he’s ever seen.
"Did you know it was supposed to snow?!”
Her joys resembles her as a child. The comparison makes him smile.
“I drove here in it,” he responds. This grabs her attention.
“You did what?” She’s upset now.
“I drove here in the snow,” he says defiantly, “And we’re driving home”
“No, we’re not! It’s too dangerous!”
She’s probably right and he knows it, there’s at least two inches on the ground, but he’s stubborn and overconfident and obnoxious. So he continues, “Yes we are. It’s too far.”
“Not if we cut through the park.”
“Your shoes?” He’s smug, he’s’ sure he’s got her on this one.
He’s disappointed when he sees her digs through her bag and present another, more comfortable pair. He gives in with a sigh once again that night.
He kneels down to the ground, one hand extending to her foot.
“Let me help with those shoes.”
She triumphantly raises her foot off the ground and hands him her second pair. He slides them off and Kyoko is too proud to be embarrassed by this. He sees her temporary distraction as an opportunity and scoops up some snow and tosses it at her. It hits her right on the arm of her coat, no damage done, but she looks scandalized. He smirks right at her before running out towards the street.
“What are you going to do about it, Mogami?” He shouts, far out from her but still in firing range.
She immediately bends down and grabs some snow and starts running, packing it into a tight snowball on her way to him.
“You’re petty!” She shouts back as she throws it at him. It hits him square in the back and he lurches forward from the force. He goes down for more only to be greeted with more snow at the back of his head. He turns around and she right behind him with about five more snow balls in her arms. He sees his defeat so he breaks out into a sprint down the sidewalk.
He may have long legs that give him speed, but Kyoko’s got aim. He’s hit from behind almost every two seconds, which would usually be unpleasant, but he can feel her smile every time he yelps out, over exaggeratedly. He deems the cold worth it.
He’s losing bad, if he’s counting correctly it’s 21-1, but he’s trying his best. Every now and then he tries to get handfuls of snow while he’s running, but fails to get the haphazard balls within five feet of her. Then he spots a little pile of snow ahead of him, and he gets this devious idea. He runs harder towards it and with both arms, engulfs the whole pile. He turns around and she’s mildly panicked, although still up for a fight. The two are still, glaring at each other in a frozen standoff. Kyoko’s moves first, hurling one of her snowballs in stock. It hits Ren in the shoulder, but it doesn’t deter him from his task. He runs awkwardly towards Kyoko with a heap of snow in his arms. Kyoko tries to stop him with a few more feeble snowballs, but he plows on unaffected. She realizes her impending icy doom when he nears and she tries to run around him. He leans over and tries to throw the pile at her in passing. The snow is heavy, though, and it throws his balance off completely, causing him to drop to the ground.
When Kyoko turns to look at him, he’s face down in the snow. The sight gets her and she can’t help but to full out laugh. His face may be cold and wet, and he may have lost, but her voice is melodic and her gasps for air are cute. He looks up and he feels blessed. Her dress is moving rhythmically with her laughter and her face is flushed red and her smile, her smile is going to kill him tonight.
Then her laughter dies down and it’s her turn to be enamored. He’s on his elbows now, gazing up at her with a sheepish smile, his cheeks are rosy while his hair is dripping a combination of water and packs of snow. He’s adorable like this and she wants to remember this image forever. She holds out her hand as a peace offering, “Truce?”.
He takes it firmly, needing all the help possible to drag him off the sidewalk and replies with a solid truce in return.
The two stand side by side, falling into step with one another. The snow is finer now, looking more like sparkly dust raining down. It’s peaceful, the white noise of snow softly hitting other snow. Somehow, the snow isolates both actors from the world. The city is changed under its white blanket. It’s quiet and calm. The only distinguishing sound is the soft crunch of two pairs of feet in the snow. It comforts Kyoko, reminding her that she will never be alone on her birthday ever again. A light smile tugs at the corners of her lips and when she peers over, she sees that he too is content.
The park entrance is ahead of them, tall trees standing out amongst the skyscrapers. They don’t say anything as they approach it, continuing to listen to their soft breaths, slow and steady. They turn in sync when the time comes and admire a different scenery. The trees are frosted and the snow is untouched. Ren spots a bench and suggests they sit down for a break.
There’s a bench nearby, overlooking the park. Ren takes the lead to brush the powder off the seat. Kyoko plops down, feet tired from long use. It’s a relief to say the least, and Ren seems to be having similar thoughts. They look out at the landscape, not focusing on anything in particular, just absorbing their surroundings.
“I got you a gift, you know,” he says, still watching the snow fall. "It’s still in my car, I was planning on giving it to you after the party.”
"You didn’t have to do that,” she protests. She thinks back to all the presents he’s gotten her, all expensive, all meaningful. She doesn’t consider her gifts to him as good as hers, regardless of how he actually feels.
He turns to her, face only about a half a foot away from hers. His voice smooth as the snow on the ground, he tells her, “I wanted to, you deserve it.”
He holds her gaze for a few more seconds before returning it to the terrain. She still looks at him though, his face focused and introspective. She watches him as he muses, “I’ll have to give it to you some other time, now.”
They both know that may not be for sometime now. She’s busy with her Momiji role and he’s just plain booked. She looks out once more.
"I wish I had taken the role for ‘A Lotus in the Mud”, he says to the wind. He misses her. Misses her acting, her ideas, her excitement, just her.
She’s taken aback by his statement. “Why?” She questions. “I thought you had other jobs.”
He picks the answer he thinks she’ll appreciate the most.
“I miss getting to watch you act,” he answers truthfully.
“Me?” She asks. “There are much more talented actors than me on set, though.”
He gazes at her again. “I doubt it Mogami-san.” He’s a little saddened by her low self esteem.
“You’re the best out of all of us.”
“T-that surely can’t be true!” She stammers out, “What about you or Moko-san or-”
“I mean it,” He cuts her off, he notices a stray flake fall unto her lashes and he has to hold himself back from brushing it off.
“You’re smart and impassioned, your acting is always a surprise and a joy to watch. You have the most heart in all of acting.”
Her mouth opens and shuts like a fish out of water. There are so many ways to respond to this, she doesn’t know which one to pick. Maybe gratitude is the best option. It would fit with the theme of the Grateful Party, right? And he’s been so kind, and he’s taught her so much, and he’s just been there for her over the past year and-
She doesn’t get to say anything because he’s already standing up, extending his hand as an offering to pull her up. She’s dodged a bullet, she knows, but she still feels guilty for not responding. Now that she thinks about it, she didn’t thank him at the party. The snake beat her to it. His hand is still in front of her, though, so she’s dragged away from the thought as she herself is dragged up.
The Daruma isn’t far from here, maybe a five minute walk. Physically it’s as quiet as before, but mentally there’s as much commotion as the party. She’s got to think of a way to thank him, and all those things he said, did he mean it? Why? How? There’s not that much special about her right? She’s just a plain girl right? But he didn’t make it seem like that.
The Daruma is too close for her to come up with neither solutions nor conclusions. When they’re at the door, Ren is ready to exchange goodbyes.
"I guess this is it, then,” he says, waving to the door.
She doesn’t know what she was expecting, but this did not cross her mind.
“No,” she says, “come inside and get warmed up at least. Your apartment is 5 miles from here.”
He doesn’t really feel like protesting, he hasn’t won one fight tonight and he can’t feel his toes at all. Dress socks can only do so much. He accepts and walk in behind her.
The couple is there to greet them. They heard about the party, the snow, and Ren was supposed to take her home anyways, and they worry like parents. So when they see them walk in they immediately perk up and rush to Kyoko. There’s a long stream of “Happy birthday” and “What does it feel like to be an adult?” and of course there are gifts. They get her a long, beautiful dress, to which they add, “for your debut!” It’s enough to make her cry. Once again, Ren is in the background, just content to watch.
It dies down after Kyoko gives them a hug and thanks them. The couple takes notice to Ren standing a good few feet from the scene. They head over to him and thank him for bringing Kyoko home safely. He’s says that she’s always welcome and prepares to brace the cold again. But it doesn’t happen. The couple offers him the spare room. It’s less of an offering and more of an insistence, with the threat of rejection being held against him. He decides he likes these two.
The couple offers to set the room up and hands them some hot chocolate. Ren learns that Kyoko likes hers with tiny marshmallows while she learns that he puts a candy cane in his. Both finds the other’s style adorable. There’s still some sparkle left in her eyes from her dress and she can’t help but think about how lucky she’s been over the past few years. Ren has the same idea, only he voices it out loud.
"You’ve got a lot of people who love you.”
Her voice is the softest he thinks he’s ever heard when she responds with a simple, “I know.”
The hot chocolate runs out sooner than initially anticipated, their cheeks are still touched by the cold when they hit the bottoms of their mugs. Their time together is almost over. Kyoko puts the cups in the sink and leads him up the stairs where the rooms are.
It hits her that their night is coming to an end during their assent, Kyoko stalls on the final step up. She turns, finally face to face with Ren as he too stops, and leans in to kiss his frosty left cheek. Her lips were as chilly as the surface of his skin, but neither seemed to notice. Instead, an intense warmth shakes them to their core. She’s wearing a blush, she knows that warmth, that she thinks the rosy color from the cold is hiding. She disregards the other warmth, hoping he will too. His lips are slightly parted, gasp forgotten halfway through when her lips leave his face. She doesn’t look up at him just yet, unsure which reaction she fears most.
“I-I didn’t get the chance to thank you.” He remains silent, and she’s still not ready to see him. Her eyes remain on her hands.
“You’ve done so much for me, guiding and supporting me, an-and I don’t think I’ve ever properly thanked you for that.”
He’s still quiet, which is a third option she hadn’t considered. She’s improvising now, deviating from her planned script, there’s nothing left in it but the scene is still going. Her hand nervously reaches for Rosa, playing with its edges and searching for guidance. “It might not be much- I know it’s not much but, I, I’ll make it up to you one day when I can call myself Japan’s actress and when we stand on equal ground.” It’s bold she knows, but she always has been bold. Maybe now she’s bold enough to face him once more.
Her chin is the first to go up, with her eyes following shortly. They latch onto his eyes first, so full of something Kyoko can’t quite place. Admiration, fondness, love. Those are the easy ones to describe - But there’s something else too, a glimmer, that shines underneath. Maybe it’s determination, or a challenge, or maybe it’s hope. She almost can’t handle it.
Then she sees his hand, unhinging hers from its tether, and next she sees the curl of his lips on their way to meet what was retrieved. Now she really can’t handle it.
Her face burns more so than before, but this time there’s no evidence of the winter weather to hide behind. She can’t hide how this affects her. His lips are pressed to her hand, and it’s too much, she thinks, yet she finds herself trying to suppress a smile. He’s looking right at her eyes, ready for when she looks back at his. He’s got a smile on her hand and she feels it in more ways than one. And like that she feels his gaze, waiting for hers. She finds herself complying. He holds everything for a short moment, and she thinks she finally gets him, all of him, parts of him that no one else does. His conflict, his pain, and his desire to resolve it.
Her chest swells with pride and honor and a familiar feeling. He made himself vulnerable to her, he trusts that she understood, and he trusts that it will stay with her. And most importantly, he’s trusting her with him, something he doesn’t trust even himself with.
He lowers her hand and says with her full attention, “I look forward to that.”
His thumb draws long, sweeping circles on the top of her hand, and she knows he’s not done. He’s trying to be careful, he wants to make sure she’s listening with every fiber of her being. She is.
“Although, I have a feeling that day is coming soon.”
She knows what he wants, and deep down she knows that’s what she wants too. It’s overwhelming, and she just nods once in response, in idle agreement. She continues up the stairs and to her room, showing him his just next door before she enters hers. She lays down, staring up blankly at the ceiling, just feeling with no energy for denial.
And just like the gentle gust outside blows the snow, her heart guides a renewed concept back into her mind.
I’m going to tell him soon.
And across the thin walls, the same thought echoes through a man.