Hot take of the night: Taiyang’s natural understanding of people, his new job as an instructor at Signal (constant exposure to teen-aged Huntsmen in training shenanigans) and his demonstrated prankster tendencies (see also: Qrow taking on the Beacon initiation day in a skirt) meant that he was perfectly molded to be the silly-yet-responsible father to the girls while they were growing up.
Qrow’s unlimited Annoying Younger Brother energy, his devotion to his nieces, his fascination with every piece of ridiculous nonsense mass produced for the tot-to-tween ages in Vale (because he and Raven had so little growing up, and Tai, Yang says she’s going to die if she doesn’t get her own Combat Barbie c’mon, Sara down the street has one…) and his complete willingness for any fun idea the girls came up with made him just the absolute best adult a pair of rambunctious girls could have had supervising them during their high energy kid years.
Tai took one look at the treehouse (a silly plank setup leaning against a ‘tree’ he’d rip out in favor of something more sturdy, like an oak) and decided his babies deserved the tallest treehouse ever. Qrow came back from a month long spying mission to find a new treehouse in the backyard that had three rooms, a smaller wooden house in it so the dolls could also have their own treehouse, and shingles on the roof.
Ruby and Yang had every doll, hair tie, pair of roller skates, nerf guns, action figure and pastry their little hearts ever desired while in the presence of their uncle. Qrow had a credit card with access to Ozpin’s bank account for spying missions and a huntsman’s salary. He used the salary to help Tai pay the mortgage, and the credit card for the huge toy car with an actual running motor he bought for Yang when she turned ten. Tai had a heart attack when Yang and Ruby drove off in it for the first time shouting about being highway robber barons. Qrow wasn’t quite sure that was the exact term for his own childhood, but hey, the girls were having fun. And no one had actually put live weapons in their hands yet. Besides, every kid in Patch wanted to be a huntsman or huntress when they were ten, all of the long-suffering adults played along until most of them found other career paths and got tired of waving toy weapons around. “Tai, they aren’t going to actually rob anyone, and didn’t you go along with your ‘rescue’ last week when the Goldberry boys down the street ‘saved’ you from the other ten year old “Grimm”?”
Every year Yang and Ruby had the best costumes in the entire school for Halloween. Their camping trips with Tai and occasionally Qrow were epic. Birthday parties had the best homemade decorations anyone in their friends had ever seen, and their dad and uncle always gave the most… interesting advice when it came to dealing with friends-turned-schoolyard-enemies.
And the one summer when Jesse from down the street taunted Yang that his ten speed bicycle could most definitely outrace her “girls’ bike” with the yellow paint and the blue streaming ribbons at the handles? Well, it took Qrow, Tai, an emergency package rush from Atlas as a favor from a Specialist friend who Absolutely Should Have Know Better, and the entire night before the Greatest Middle School Race Patch had ever seen to get their plan together. But when Yang started peddling in front of all her family, friends, classmates, and fellow villagers from Patch the next morning…
The flames shooting out the back were also a nice touch. Qrow made a mental note though to remind Jimmy next time he saw him that special request of this nature were meant for twelve year olds.
These two men threw themselves into parenting, and their very particular skill sets meant that Yang and Ruby had the best childhoods growing up.