Dr. bullshit

I post a lot throughout the day I'm not a bot I just think ideas at the speed of light

[slightlyneurotica]

until I make a proper intro post, here is a list of media I write/talk about:

disco elysium, fear and hunger, death stranding 2, Rick and Morty, brawl stars, valorant, borderlands (1,2, pre sequel, and tales), outlast trials

also because I did unfortunately add R&M to this list, quick disclaimer I do NOT ship or condone rickorty.

[slightlyneurotica]

more of my shit posting My Little Trials: Friendship is MK

my watermark doesn't appear on the rarity + lilya one but. I did make it. I just forgor

[slightlyneurotica]

My Little Trials: Friendship is MK

might make more idk drop ideas

[drpenisflargus]

Why does Easterman walk like this dude switching his hips and shit

[slightlyneurotica]

how good was coyles blowjob that easterman gave him a new trial, a new outfit, AND his own expop/bitch.

how does he do it.

[slightlyneurotica]

would you rather

get head from the Biter

or

give head to the Berserker

decisions, decisions...

get head from the biter

give head to the berserker

AOUHHHHH WHATEVER EASTERMAN WANTS ME TO DO AOUGHHH 😫😫😫😫

Remaining time: 5 days 9 hours

[slightlyneurotica]

leather daddy kim kitsuragi and latex bitch harry du bois, stay with me now.

[slightlyneurotica]

they say the heavier the burdens of the man, the heavier the balls..........

[slightlyneurotica]

'whoops, all Neil Vana headcanons' (SFW+NSFW)

CW: some slight DS2 plot spoilers, smut, minor angst for fun,

NOTES:

I tried, I really tried, to do a Sam/Higgs/Neil headcanon list, but then I just blanked on Sam + Higgs, so therefore, whoops all Neil Vana.

I really like Neil Vana.

SFW ~

struggles to open up about his emotions and overall feelings, if something bothers him he won't tell you unless you really coax it out of him.

brooder. in his own head a lot, and hardly ever starts casual conversation on purpose, but that doesn't mean he isn't a fan of casual conversation, talk to this man please he has things to say he just wants you to say things first.

big fan of stray animals, cats, dogs, doesn't matter. if he sees a stray, and he has a bottle of water on him and there's something that can be used as a dish nearby, he makes sure he spares a little for the strays. ..and also does attempt to pet them as well.

I think on a scale of 1-10 of alcohol tolerance where 1 is a "one drink = one drunk" and 10 is a stonewall where you can't even tell someone drank in the first place, Neil is a solid 4. do not let his demeanor fool you!!!! give this man a beer and a half, and he will spill his guts..........at the karaoke machine.

in a hypothetical perfect world where he raised Lou somehow, he's absolutely the type to read a bedtime story to her and find himself interested in the story himself. Lou could've fallen asleep by the fourth page of the book, and depending on the story itself i think Neil would read on beside her just to see what happens, finish the book, and then tuck her in again and go to bed himself.

also I do think he'd watch Sesame Street with her. I think he would have a certain fondness for Cookie Monster. his cookie related antics make Neil smile.

I think he smells like pine, or cedar. something woody, probably with hints of vanilla and some form of musk. a very heavy scent, for man with heavy burdens.

I don't think he's a Michelin star cook by any means, but I think he's a pretty damn good cook. it's the Mediterranean in him.

he's probably not a fan of flashing white light, reminds him of smuggling still-mothers across checkpoints and having guards flash their flashlights in his eyes to see if he's intoxicated. those checkpoints alone haunt him, but the lights don't help either.

doesn't like making new friends, he thinks it's hard to get them and harder to maintain them. especially when he has to lie about what he does for a living, and why he goes on "work trips" so often, and comes back so tired and numb.

probably does yoga in his living room. not like a routine he does everyday, but every once in a while you could probably find him doing some stretches

big on button ups, I think even in his casual time he finds comfort in wearing a button up.

NSFW ~

okay this is my favorite part.

switch, with a preference to service top. he loves to receive, but it just feels so good to be able to give you what you need, he gets off on you getting off on him.

grabber, his hands are somewhere on you and they grab. your hair, your chin, your wrists, thighs, ankles, whatever. he's grabbing them.

I think it's a clean tossup between precision/sloppiness for him. it really does depend on the situation, but he's a lot more precise on a good day, and a lot more sloppy on his not so good days, (like coming home from a snuggling run).

while I don't think he has a size kink, I also don't think he can't appreciate if there's a size difference between you two. whether you're bigger than him, or he's bigger than you, it definitely does something to him. but he will NEVER admit that

big into you being on your back on his aforementioned good days. loves to see your face twisted in ecstacy at his own doing. but on this also aforementioned not-so-good days, it's a rough on your stomach day, doesn't want you to see the relief he gets on being so rough in the first place, doesn't want you to ask what's got him so rough.

sit on his face. it doesn't matter what's in your pants, dick or pussy, saddle up on this man's face and let him do his thing with his tongue.

he can be a tease he can be a very MEAN tease. do with that what you will, but just know he can tease for very long periods of time on a good day.

big on kissing during, any part of you will do, he just likes a little kiss kiss 🥺 but he does prefer your lips, your neck, and on your lower pelvis.

with what I said about him being a tease earlier, I think dirty talk can vary. sometimes it can be phrases:

"Try not to squirm." / "What did I say about running?" / "Can you take this or not?"

"Doing well, amore mio. Doing good."

"Sembri perfetto, assolutamente perfetto."

"So good to me."

To simple words, or commands:

"Good."

"C'mon.."

"Shit.."

"Ah, fuck!"

"Enough."

Overall if you ask me, I think he's more vocal in a grunting/moan sense than a speaking sense.

He does moan and grunt though. A lot. Big grunter, mild moaner.

stamina-wise, I think he can go at a minimum two rounds at a maximum I'll be generous and say four, but be KIND to this man he is tired and carries big sadnesses.........

while I think he'd prefer to cum on you rather than in you, he does enjoy the feeling of cumming inside. but somehow I think he'd find more intimacy finishing on your stomach, ass, face, etc. don't ask me why, I don't know, I just feel.

aftercare is pretty good, I think he gets you a nice glass of water, a little towel, and lets you drink and calm down while he cleans you up.

but his favorite form of aftercare is the cuddling aspect. he LOOOUUUVES to be held. loves it. his head, in the nape of your neck, while you rub his back and hold him close?? nut.

I think if he proposed a safe word it would just be "stop." If you say stop during sex, he's stopping, he's checking in, and he's reassuring you he loves you. 🤷🤷🤷 what can I say, he is not the most creative man

[slightlyneurotica]

thinking of a handsome jack who is the type to have you say on his lap, toying with your dick/pussy passively while on a call...

does not acknowledge your cries beyond shushing them and 'apologizing' to whoever is on the other end, and once the call is finished, wipes your secretions off of his fingers and onto your thigh and tells you to run along..

idk tho 👀