-~-

[slinkysoup]

The old things are closing their spines

A time of growth is opening its ends

All of my love and duration is bookmarked

A sense of new is a rain on weathered asphalt

I want everything at once with no linearity

But each hour can be embraced with what could be

[slinkysoup]

I am a creature of secrets

Seduced by the freedom

To kiss you in my mind only

[slinkysoup]

You don’t know and I can’t tell you.

A hundred invented scenarios construct a universe where we are safe together

My tangential fabric craves to destroy itself

[slinkysoup]

The horizon is always there We will never see Around the corner Into the mind Explore the heart In any tangible way

[slinkysoup]

If the things in my heart were written plainly across my chest I wouldn't go anywhere I drove for hours and I couldn't escape you I came home to your arms but they were distant I can't stand the thought of eternity Half my life is enveloped in falsity Outrunning the fear, paralyzed by night Maybe tomorrow I'll see you and it won't hurt Maybe I can watch her touch your shoulder and I'll feel happiness for you Maybe in a week I won't want her to be everything you don't want her to be But today, plainly I want to be several people at once.

[slinkysoup]

It's not you and it never was Regrets forming on the tip of my tongue Slipping away back into the shadows Catching my coat at the corners when the wind blows

[slinkysoup]

You're as far away as the mountain peaks But I can see you so clearly after a rain Stormy mind cloudy heart but still every time you bring color to my cheeks

[slinkysoup]

It's still there in the way you move The reason why I fell in love with you

[slinkysoup]

My mouth tastes like metal I think I saw it in your eyes too The nausea Do you wish I had insisted? Because I wish you would have kissed me At least one last time to let me know That I'm just a character in your own dramatic show Screaming now at the stage ahead Take back all the words you've said

[slinkysoup]

You blame me for my depth I blame you for your shallow reasons My tides have tendencies and yours are managed by the afternoon breeze

[slinkysoup]

A handful of almosts Too late too sorry too much indecision The door is closed now don't come back to me In late July I felt the warm air touch my heart In places I had forgotten about It's February now and the cold has gone on for too long Here we are staring at our shoes we put on for the rain The salt from the air obstructs our ability to say all the things we should have in October Instead we pressed our bodies close and wished for things to be different With hysteria I laugh at the end of beginnings Holding onto another December when I felt safe I'm almost strong enough And it was almost soon enough I'm almost about to lose my sun

[slinkysoup]

The key to my undoing Is locked in your eyes when you look to the side Carrying the brink of the world on your eyelashes Your fingertips I can't stop staring It's making my brain unravel I was happier before I heard you call my name 1:30 under the neon lights last call for drinks I don't know where I am in my own universe Lost between the sun and some other galaxy

[slinkysoup]

It's the constant summer Until the torrential rains Passing us onto a newer phase Defensive dressing I would rather have the vulnerability Your hand on my thigh Warm whispers at night Please answer the phone The pillows can't mimic your solstice and There's been too much evening mist

[slinkysoup]

Those things always creep in Permeate the pores and Remind you Redesign your Moods and affectations Soft beautiful voices Singing slightly off key Expecting something That's a little more

[slinkysoup]

I'm obsessed with the wanting for what is not Craving the words from your lips you will never say I'm perpetually watching to see if the fight will come if you can't take it any longer how I feel underneath your fingernails I'm drowned in the disappointment of loves that set out to sea and never return Forgotten and replaced by the rhythm of the tide I want to look and see it in your eyes I want to wake up one day and be sick of my own compromise

[slinkysoup]

Most of who you are exists only in my imagination Like a dream from adolescence where you felt that one feeling that you just keep chasing You touch my arm and the illusion shatters Two consciousnesses on the verge of isolation strained from The pull of our confused hearts That probably have it all wrong

[slinkysoup]

With everything there is change But your green eyes stay the same