Slow Burn

BloodySarcastic on AO3

[trainstationgoodbye]

Challengers (2024) dir. Luca Guadagnino

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

[thewitchway]

I AM GOING TO LET YOU IN ON A LITTLE SECRET

"When are you going to update this fic?" is pressue.

"Omg I've reread this SO many times it lives in my head permanently you have rearranged my brain!!" is FOOD.

"I am LIVING for this fic I can't WAIT to know what happens next!" is MOTIVATION.

Especially today when Ao3 is full of of the CRAZIEST bots* leaving the weirdest non-comments you can imagine, I PROMISE that leaving a COMMENT will help your author. They will have the feedback and the love and the encouragement that they need to continue.

*I literally had a comment that said I was more interesting than people thought I was.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

villain going to the goon shelter to pick out a new henchman

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

this energetic and diabolical boy was rescued from a goon hoarding situation… he loves pulling levers, gloating, and turning cranks with great abandon. prefers to be the only goon. needs an active lair with plenty of enrichment.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

now this fella comes with some baggage. his previous villain was going to have put down when he refused to perform unsedated human vivisection as a form of torture. one of our agents intercepted the execution and brought him to the goon shelter. would thrive in an environment of G or PG-rated villainry.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

on the other hand, if you’re looking for something a little more… advanced… then this fine lady over here would make a great challenge for an experienced villain able to set firm boundaries. she will NOT be released to first-time villains; proof of prior henchpeople must be demonstrated before adoption approval. high prey drive. under no circumstances should she be left alone with children or small animals. must sign waiver releasing the goon shelter from responsibility if her behavior is deemed excessively depraved.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

These two are pair-bonded and may only be adopted together. Up for anything, they are fiercely loyal to their employer provided their needs are met and they are permitted to hold hands. They look alarmingly similar to one another but it is undeterminable whether they are close blood relatives or lovers who choose to dress and style themselves in identical ways. Habit of finishing each other’s sentences with rhyming couplets; we have not attempted to train this out of them. Will answer to whatever names or titles you give them so long as they are complimentary and/or rhyme.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

Will you help this goon find his forevil lair? He’s been returned to the goon shelter six times now but we refuse to give up on him. A vile little rat of a man, he’d be the perfect accomplice to someone willing to overlook his unfortunate heterosexuality. If gay-coding is not your style and you don’t expect it from a henchman, please consider giving this little guy a good home in your dastardly schemes.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

This guy is not your typical goon. He was rescued from a high-kill shelter after being deemed unfit for henching. His deep baritone voice, his darkly handsome good looks, and his flair for the dramatic have made prospective employers pass over him time and time again, making him the longest resident of the goon shelter. But don’t judge a book by its cover—while his appearance and demeanor suggest “villain”, his real passion is taking orders and faithfully serving a master. If you’re secure in your villainry and not prone to jealousy, he may just be what it takes to turn your base into a lair.

[slow-burn]

This is a fucking boring World Cup final.

[fawn-under-stars]

fox ryland !!!!!!!

[adv3nturelust]

May all of you find jobs and careers to support yourselves, your families, your pets, and may you never spend a single night dreading going to work the next day. May your jobs be fulfilling, safe, rewarding, prosperous, and healthy for you and your goals.

[whatacockpillockjames]

[whatacockpillockjames]

[whatacockpillockjames]

[slow-burn]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Top Gear (UK) RPF, James May’s Shed Load of Ideas Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James May/Sarah Frater/Sim Oakley Additional Tags: Painful Sex, Menopause, Perimenopause, Menopause Sex, Soft, Polyamory, Established Relationship, Cunnilingus, Vaginal Fingering, Prostate Massage, Blended Orgasms, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Lube, Frottage, Intercrural Sex, Extended Foreplay, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Body Positivity, belly love, Threesome - F/M/M Summary: Sim reached out to squeeze James’s hand at the sight of her and James turned from the vision of Woman to the vision of Man and sighed at his great good fortune. 

[jellyfilledeyes]

"Waa why aren't fandoms fun anymore" because you keep policing people's headcanons, make fun of cosplayers,make fun of selfshipers, make fun of beginner artists and just make fun of people for having fun 😐

[luluxa]

[luluxa]

we’re definitely dating

a company piece to this one 

[luluxa]

7:00 AM

[slow-burn]

Having something really terrifying like multiple shaking, sweating hypoglycaemic events per night that keep you from sleeping with no diagnosis to explain them and then having doctors show zero concern or interest beyond ordering blood tests that will take a week to schedule and a week to hear back about is seriously dehumanising.

I also don’t feel like they believe me? They keep trying to insist I’m hyperglycaemic, even asking me questions repeatedly one after the other in increasingly incredulous tones trying to convince me I’m wrong. But the symptoms don’t fit.

And agin, they don’t actually give a toss.

[unheardoracle]

I love characters who are like "I'm a terrible person" but when you look closer it's more like

"I adapted to survive something and now I don't know how to stop being that version of myself."

[theehorsepusssy]