Hear me out! Tav brought a statue of Astarion to the camp but Astarion does not recognize himself in it and does not understand why their leader spent 5000 gold on a random stone man. Meanwhile the party is betting on how long it will take Astarion to guess whose statue it is.
"He's not... he's not gonna figure it out anytime soon, is he?"
"Sshhh!"
Shadowheart shushed Karlach with an angry frown and a single finger thrown to her lips.
The two of them - along with your other companions observed the scene unfolding on the other side of the camp. Right where a delivery had just been made - and quite an uncommon one.
A giant stone statue, depicting... Astarion - and almost fully nude at that.
You couldn't resist when the offer had been made to you at the carnival at the outskirts of Baldur’s Gate. 5000 gold had felt like nothing for the punchline you had been about to make with having a statue be made of the one companion that couldn't remember what he himself looked like.
And Astarion, upon discovering Tav's most recent purchase, had started to throw a temper tantrum immediately, almost fainting when he had heard the paid sum out of your mouth.
The vampire had worked himself into an outright frenzy, screaming, hissing, gesticulating towards the statue, then back to you, then to the skies. Meanwhile all you could do anymore was biting your lip to stop yourself from bursting into the biggest laughing fit of your life.
The rest of the group kept observing from a safe distance.
"Istik", Lae'zel mumbled under her breath. But even the sober githyanki could barely hide a smile.
Shadowheart shushed her as well. Wyll had just been silently shaking his head for the last couple of minutes. Shadowheart had started taking bets on how long it would take the oblivious vampire to realise the cruel trick that was being played on him. Karlach, being way too optimistic, had already lost some coin to the cleric with their estimate of a few minutes.
Only Gale who had been busy this far with some of his thousand books had missed the whole spectacle so far. Just now had the wizard realised that something was going down. He eyed the fighting trio of you Astarion and stone Astarion and then the group of bystanders, trying to decipher the situation. When he couldn't make any logical sense of any of it he went over to the small onlooking group. "I appear to have missed something? What is-"
Shadowheart hissed at him to shut up, causing Gale to flinch back with a hurt facial expression. Wyll though wasn't impressed by the cleric and enlightened his friend: "It looks like our clever leader Tav has taken up the offer of getting a stone statue of Astarion for a bargain of 5000 gold without telling anyone. And now we're betting how long it's going to take him to realise it's him."
Shadowheart stared the Blade of Frontiers down. Wyll merely shrugged his shoulders. He'd faced more fearsome creatures than the cleric aplenty.
Gale just blinked several times at him, letting the words settle. Then a grin spread on the wizard's face. "I bet 100 gold it's gonna take him at least until the end of the day."
Shadowheart's furious expression lightened noticeably and she stretched out her hand to Gale. They shook on the bet. Then everyone turned back to the two Astarion's and you to continue watching the scene.
"Why in the nine hells would you get a statue of some random guy - he isn't that... Well, he is quite handsome!" Astarion yelled at you while you had to hide your face in your hands desperately trying to pull yourself together.
The vampire didn't let up: "Well, if only it had been me, then I would have understood, darling, who wouldn't want that as a piece of decor, but-"
That was it, you broke. Hysterical laughter started shaking you, up to the point where you doubled over and could barely breathe between laughing and crying from laughing.
The vampire meanwhile went through the whole spectrum of emotions known under the sun in a matter of seconds. Angered, confused, flustered. And then finally something in the elf’s brain clicked together.
He stared at the statue then at you, back to the statue and suddenly his hands wandered over his own face as if to grasp it's lines and shapes.
"You...," he started and stopped. Through your tears you were sure you could see the vampire's pointy ears turn bright pink. "That IS me!"
You were barely able to nod as another fit of laughter shook you. Astarion’s mouth opened several times but no sound came out. A rare occasion to the see the sassy rogue so void of words.
Meanwhile, a bunch of moans could be heard from the other side of camp where Shadowheart collected her won gold from the others.)
"Why would you-", Astarion began and his expression was barely readable while your laughter slowly died down and you were able to kneel back on your feet.
"Didn't you say it yourself? He's quite handsome, isn't he? Now you get to see for yourself again."
Astarion pointed an angry finger at you about to throw another fit but then his eyes fell on the statue again. Now with knowing what it was and what it meant it shut him up immediately.
He took a few steps closer to get a better look. His anger at you momentarily forgotten as he gazed upon his own image for the first time in over 200 years.
I can't stop thinking about Astarion with a Druid!Tav who is lounging around in their wild cat shape but he is completely unaware...
g/n Tav!reader, could be read platonically and romantically
Astarion wouldn't think twice about you being missing from camp first thing in the morning. If you weren't out sourcing some breakfast, you would be down at the river bathing - nothing out of the ordinary.
What was out of the ordinary, however, was the cat that was lounging around on a rock in the sun beside his tent.
He just stood watching it for a moment, eyes narrowing as it opened its eyes and looked back at him, having the audacity to roll over to sit up and stare at him, head cocked a little, ears twitching.
It wasn't that Astarion didn't like cats, they were rather adorable little creatures, but having one trying to make his way into his tent slowly but surely wasn't his idea of the perfect bed mate.
He would eventually break away from it, sitting outside to enjoy the sun himself while packing up his stuff for the day.
When the cat hopped down and rubbed up his back, he couldn't help but jump - the quiet minx. He would bare his fangs a little, hissing at the cat as if in a warning but failing to deter it. It's tail instead quirking up as if amused.
"You're lucky I have already eaten," he would warn pointedly, narrowing his eyes.
He would hold his arms up in defeat as the cat stepped cautiously into his lap, forcing him to drop his embroidery with a huff.
The purring sent him over the edge, failing miserably to hide the fact that he was secretly happy for the attention as his hand started to stroke between the creatures eyes slowly, feeling himself relax a little as he did so.
"I suppose you're not too bad..." he would murmur as he continued to stoke it as the morning started to wile away. He didn't really need to start packing until Tav was back anyway.
"Has anyone seen Tav this morning?" Karlach's voice was characteristically loud as she barreled into the center of camp.
"Oh, they're on Astarion," Halsin replied, lips ticking up into a smirk as Astarion's eye's widened.
His head would snap down to look at the cat in his lap, their eyes now looking right back up at him and almost smiling...
"Why, you cheeky little..!"
The cat would push itself off, butting their head against his hand once more and, sure enough, transformed back - laughing hysterically at a rather flustered Astarion - "You're not too bad yourself."
He would just roll his eyes, grumbling something about you being lucky he didn't drain you, but secretly hoping you would cuddle up to him again, no matter which form you were in.
Find my Masterlist Here and My Astarion Playlist Here.
summary. in which one of Astarion's especially vivid nightmares results in him waking up to Tav at the mercy of his own hands...and the shame that comes with it.
warnings. angst, fluff, comfort
pairing. Astarion x GN!reader
a/n. someone pls get this man therapy that's all i ask,,, also this takes place sometime during act 3 before you confront cazador!! first post too so pls forgive typos
Had breathing always been this hard?
It's not like he had to breathe anyway. The undead have more perks than one would think, and having no need for air was one that became particularly useful in unexpected ways. Yet as he stands in Cazador's dungeon again--a place he longs to rid from the darkest corners of his mind--all he can do is stumble over his own breath, crimson eyes darting around frantically in search of an exit.
And suddenly, his siblings are at the mercy of the ascension, floating helplessly in the chains of a red aura--Cazador's aura. Despite the chaos, Astarion's eyes narrow in on the one pedestal with no occupant, and he realizes it's his own designated place.
It's getting harder to breathe now.
A breath creeps up behind his shoulder, sending pure dread throughout his entire body as he hears Cazador's voice far too close than he ever wanted it to be.
"Wake up, child. This is all you've ever been meant for."
Astarion whips around and lunges at the man, his hands wrapping viciously around the throat he's fantasized about ripping apart for the past two hundred years. His nails dig into the flesh of the vampire lord's neck, leaving indents in the shape of crescent moons, just enough to cause panic but not enough to draw blood. But Cazador only cackles, his eyes staring right into Astarion's as he hollers over and over again.
"Wake up."
"Wake up!"
"--Astarion!"
The spawn's eyes snap open, recognition finally flooding his expression as he finds himself staring down at you. The very face he sees in the softest of dreams, the lips he longs to kiss at every waking moment, and the eyes that gaze at him with the love and adoration he's been missing for most of his wretched eternal life. Though he'd never admit it, you saved him. From the moment he'd threatened your life at the nautiloid crash to the moment he held you close to his chest in the confines of his tent, he would be by your side until you tired of him and threw him away.
All he wanted--all he could wish for--was only a fraction of it in return. And you'd given him that, and so much more.
But now, you're scared. Terrified, even. Of him.
With horror, he realizes his fingers are digging into your throat. Your precious, tender throat that you offer him not for something in return, but simply because you care for him.
All at once as he tears his hands away, he wants to cut them off and bury himself in his own grave again. He doesn't meet your eyes, afraid of what disgust might be held in them, but he knows you're too kind for that. Too kind to see the kind of monster he is.
You're gasping for your breath, and his stomach knots in a way that would have sent him hurling if it weren't for the fact that he's too occupied drinking in what he's done. To you.
"I'm okay, I'm okay, Astarion," you choke out, perching on both your elbows as you struggle to recover. Even now, all you seem to care about is him. He almost hates you for it--hates you for not stabbing a stake through his heart the moment his hands met your neck. "Astarion-"
"Your throat," he croaks, despising the slight crack of his voice as he reaches for your cheek, but stops before he even gets close. He doesn't trust himself to open his mouth again.
"It's okay, really, I can just get Shadowheart to heal me," you shake your head, and he finds himself in disbelief as you crawl toward him, tossing the sheets to the side. He shifts the slightest away and you understand, immediately sitting back down. You look like you want to say something, but you close your mouth and watch him patiently, as if waiting for him to make the first move.
After a suffocating silence, he turns his back to you. "I'll be sleeping elsewhere tonight."
He intends of never sharing a room with you again, in fear of what he could possibly do to you as a result of his selfish desires to keep you close, and you seem to pick up on the tone of his words. You always do. "Astarion, please."
"I do apologize, sincerely. I'll form a better apology tomorrow, but for now, I'll fetch Shadowheart or that damned wizard and-"
He fights the urge to shiver when he feels your hand on his. How you manage to have such an impact on him with a simple touch he does not know, and does not care because all he wants is more. To pull you close, to beg you to keep him, to use him, to punch him, strangle him for all he cared, in hopes you'll even consider ever speaking to him again. Instead, he turns to look at you.
Gods, you're beautiful.
Even with those terrible bruises he'd go to hell and earth to take back, your beauty in unmatched with anything he's ever seen. Even with the bed hair and the anxiousness pursing your lips, he can't bring himself to look away again.
"Please stay. I'm not mad, nor afraid."
The words sound like honey on your tongue.
"Please," You say again, slowly this time. "Stay."
His chest feels tight, threatening to tear itself apart as his voice comes out in a crooked whisper. "I could have killed you."
"You didn't."
"If you died too, I don't know--what would I even do with myself? What would I-" He hates it when he sounds like this. Vulnerable, or as Cazador liked to call it: pathetic. But he can't help the words tumbling out his blasted mouth with the way you're gazing at him with nothing but worry. Somehow, with you, it feels strange.
Refreshing, almost.
Your hand squeezes around his as if to remind him you're still here. He meets your eyes again and it's all it takes to break what little will he has left, as he lets you pull him close in a crushing hug--one that's all too welcomed.
And as the two of you lie awake in each other's embrace, he thanks all the gods he doesn't worship for putting you on his path.
Astarion has an undying love for the innocent little kisses you give him.
They make him giddy almost, in a way he never thought he'd be able to feel again. He loves that you're drawn to him the second everyone's attention is directed elsewhere. Loves how you always- in that oh-so special way of yours- make sure he's okay with how close you're getting before you lean in and plant a soft little smooch to whatever part of him you're nearest at the time.
(He even loves the way you smile reassuringly when you see something in him that tells you he needs space- sometimes before he himself knows it- and you back away without so much as a sniff. Always patient, and never once disappointed. It's so sweet that it's almost sickening- makes his teeth hurt.)
His knees weaken at the feeling of your lashes against the soft skin of his cheek. Practically buckle whenever you mouth at the corner of his jaw before whispering softly into his ear. Sometimes it's just to tell him you love him, other times it's to make an offhand comment about someone neither of you particularly like. And, how you breathe a laugh so quiet that only he can hear when he responds to whatever you said with an equally hushed quip??
On occasion he'll find the courage to reach out and hold your hand when you're sat together by the fire, and you get this big, dumb smile on your pretty face. Your gratitude comes in the form of kisses- one to each of the knuckles on his offered hand. One. Two. Three. Four. By the fifth one, he can feel a warmth radiating from your flushing face, so hot it rivals the heat from the campfire.
He could go on forever.
When he's lent over a book and you bend down low enough to press your lips to the top of his head and not so subtly inhale the scent of his hair? The same kiss to his forehead that comes every night without fail before you're off to bed? The chaste press to the apple of his cheek as you're passing by, too busy with a particular task to stop and chat? The one between his brows that you let linger just long enough to rid him of the crease that comes with a bout of frustration?
Hells, sometimes you'll simply peck his shoulder in response when he teases you with a nudge mid-banter, and it nearly sends him to the ground. There's just something so… nice about it? The way you're kissing him as a way to express adoration, with nary an expectation to what comes after? Truly just to kiss him, and nothing more??
I Keep Thinking About Astarion Being Ace!Tav's Guard Dog
Based on some of my conversations with @any59 and @leighsartworks216. The brainrot is so real you guys.
Astarion x Ace!Tav Masterlist
Astarion spent 200 years just trying to keep himself alive, but in truth having no say in the matter, one way or another
He gains his freedom and he does whatever he can do with his limited power to keep himself safe
And then he starts to fall for Tav, and all of that desperate need to survive gets transferred onto them
Just six months of happy memories with them is able to counter weight 200 years of torture and despair, how can he be expected to let that light be snuffed out
So, he keeps a protective arm around their waist, all but growling when an unwanted party gets to close
Tav goes down in battle and Astarion stands over their body daggers and thoughts bloody
Somebody insults his love and he bares his teeth daring them to say another word
Tav has made it more than clear they're not interested in using him for his body as so many others have done, but how else is he supposed to show his devotion
Maybe he can do this instead, use his body to protect them, to be that safe place for Tav the way they are for him
What's a little more blood on his hands if it keeps theirs clean
Some part of Tav knows he's going a little too far sometimes, holding just a little too tightly to the point he leaves marks, but they're not about to stop him
They spent so long feeling like they needed to justify their existence that to have somebody be willing to love and protect them just for being is everything and because they know they leave claw marks of their own
Me? Oh, nothing. Just thinking about Astarion and Tav getting into a lover’s spat. So, Gale polymorphs them both into cats so they can quietly reconcile their differences. And it’s the cutest sight to find them both snuggled up in Astarion’s tent in the morning, and their tails curled together in a heart shape. Safe to say, they resolved their issues.
Honestly I think if Astarion were in a relationship with a good aligned Tav he'd hate Halsin.
I don't think it's lost on Astarion that he's short tempered and selfish. And the person he cares the most for is entirely different. But they care for him and seem to overlook the worst parts of him, even if he doesn't want to save orphans or whatever.
But then here's Halsin, who despite his own trauma, is still a good person. He's kind and genial and he's out here trying to do the right thing.
And to top it all off, he wants to have sex with Tav. Sex, the one thing Astarion should be good at, the one thing he should be able to provide to Tav. He's not a good or nice person, he's a pile of burdens, in his own mind, but he should be able to give them sex. But he can't.
And now Halsin, who is the kind of person Astarion isn't, is trying to give his partner the only thing Astarion sees himself as being good at. What does he have left to give to Tav? How can Astarion hope to keep them in his life?
I see this gets reblogged quite a bit with caveats about down the line. And I think Astarion could be open to it later. The game obviously needs an ending so it ties up his healing in a nice little bow. But I do think it would be a while before he could let another person in, both to himself emotionally at that level, and to Tav. Because I think part of him will still believe Tav is ready to leave at any second for some time.
I also think it's important for him and Tav to have established their relationship outside the crisis mode and power-dynamics of the game's story.
Once Astarion stops seeing himself as an inferior choice, I think it could work.
My Batstarion headcannon is that Tav lets him feed off them willingly like normal, but there’s no fear of Tav being drained because he’s so small. So Tav happily lets their silly bat boyfriend gorge himself on their blood until he is finally pulled off and he just looks like this.
Like fully lost in the sauce with a messy mouth, 🥴expression, and fat little belly. You cannot convince me otherwise and I will die on this hill.
Tara: Mister Dekarios, I request that you open the door so that I may leave the room.
Gale: I just let you in 5 minutes ago.
Tara: And it is now imperative that I leave the room.
[Gale lets Tara out of the room]
[5 Minutes later]
Tara, muffled, through the door: Mister Dekarios! I require entry to the room!
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