sometimes a slut

Emily--- she/her/hers

[insomniac-arrest]

a bop, a banger, and a jam are all different

but you have to feel the difference in your heart

[ororosmunroe]

a bop is something light or something you casually enjoy. you don’t mind it/it’s cute in the moment. 

a banger is something goes hard (some times unnecessarily) can invoke deep emotions. can fizzle out after some time has passed. 

a jam is something that can be considered as nostalgic. it is a song that is a personal anthem, no matter what you are going through you just respond to it. it is immortal. 

[walkingdorito]

[arewetumbling]

1st Grade Teacher: The Natives taught us to grow crops and we all had thanksgiving! 


6th Grade: we might have kicked the Natives off their land, and for that we are so sorry.


Me: but did you mur-


Teacher: you’ll learn that in high school


12th grade: We killed that one Native and we are so sorry, but the BUFFALOS, WE WERE DICKS FOR THAT!!


College: It was genocide.

[achromic-red-dreams-doze-angrily]

this…is accurate

[pukicho]

[kiyokospeaks]

The more I see of Eric Andre the more I’m convinced he is some chaotic neutral trickster god sent to the mortal plane to torment us

[distinguishedbaloney]

[simonalkenmayer]

Genius

[therightprometheanfire]

American Children: Hey, can we be murdered a little less please?

Republicans: What the fuck? What about my guns? What about me, a person innocently playing with my death-machines as a hobby? I am the real victim here. Kids these days are so entitled…

[pyomorphic]

[2headedgrrrl]

My favorite Gordon Ramsay moment is when his food was too slow so he took a jog and then fell asleep

[prettynerdieworks]

[xspiritofthemapleleaf]

If you ever think your 12 year old self was an idiot just remember this: 

one time when I was in seventh grade I decided to walk home from the community center without wearing any shoes. But it was like 98 degrees outside, so obviously the pavement was hot as balls, but I stubbornly continued to walk home barefoot. Long story short I got second degree burns from the pavement and painful blisters on every part of my feet. When I had to explain to my parents why hell I walked home barefoot I told them that my shoes were hurting my feet. I ended up going to go see doctors, and I wore inserts in my shoes for three years. My parents even considered surgery to fix my feet so that they wouldn’t hurt. 

I never had the courage to tell them that the reason why I walked barefoot that one day was not because my feet hurt, but because, being an avid fan of Avatar: The Last Airbender, I had wanted fucking callouses on my feet like Toph

[xspiritofthemapleleaf]

Holy shit let this die

[teenscoolest]

[historyandmemes]

Noah when it started raining and everybody tried to apologize and get on the Ark….

[mulaneysbutt]

Religion came up with Petunia recently.

bonus, Petunia Last Supper:

[bob-belcher]

[knitmeapony]

Mark Hamill goodnaturedly patting Chadwick Boseman on the shoulder to celebrate his success is one of the most blessed images I’ve ever seen.

[fuocogo]

This is the Money Chadwick. Reblog In 47 minutes to get 48 million dollars.

[sonseulsoleil]

Tom Holland’s face when Jimmy Kimmel asks if anyone dies in Infinity War is fucking killing me:  

[sluttyspongebob]

my brother has never seen game of thrones

[duskenpath]

Guys I just realized the last supper was the first murder mystery dinner!!!

[duskenpath]

My Roman Catholic parents did not find this as funny and thought provoking as I did

[dennys]

don’t talk to me until i’ve had my mourning coffee