hi

idiot | 25 | they/she/he

[lustcannibalism]

I have already died thrice by 1pm

[coffee-without-anesthetics]

never kill yourself . your next apple could be so good it makes you feel like a horse

[yujateaandpi]

Was driving with my grandmother and in broken English she says “no eyes… no nose… no face. Don’t trust.” To which I looked around wildly in search of this omen of ill portend.

Cybertruck. It was a cybertruck.

[alsophila-grahami]

mutuals to sit under this thing with

[amazoogle]

let's develop a perfect plan

[amazoogle]

1. get cozy in bed

[charlesoberonn]

Gritty Detective Fiction: There's been a murder 🚬🫩🏚🌧

Cozy Mystery Fiction: There's been a murder ☕️🤔🏡☀️

[ruby-white-rabbit]

Intense birdwatcher: there's been a murder 🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🔭😀

[tomorrowillbeyou]

nice outfit dude LOL. legolas called. apparently they're taking the hobbits somewhere really crazy

[nomehablen2]

Ah…….annuzzer day in bikini bottem………

[molabuddy]

3 hours of sleep = i hate people who laugh

0 ours of sleep = waouw 🌼🌼🌼🌼🐎

[tomorrowillbeyou]

cds 💿 are so cool its literally a cirlcle 🔵 that has music 🎶 in its heart......

[abortionado]

Rolled up the living room rug to clean my apartment/make dinner on roller skates because I suddenly remembered that I’m an adult with free will…..Life is beautiful

[abortionado]

my betrothed just got home…..it’s always Why we’re you using kitchen knives on skates don’t do that again and never How was rollercooking did you have fun rollercooking

[toastpotent-deactivated20250619]

nobody:

half full water bottle left behind on the floor of a public bus: *rolls around*

[thejoanglebook-deactivated20210]

OP is an optimist

[almondmilkbitch]

superbat is a bad ship name. it should be manman

[smokefuneral-deactivated2015020]

UGH….IM EMO!!! FUCK YOU! IM EXTREMELY FUCKING EMO0 AND DEPRESSED!! FUCK IT ALL!!! FUCK YOU IM EMO AND DEPRESSED

[quietwingsinthesky]

do you think bowser ever gets anxious after kidnapping peach again that he went too far this time and he calls mario up in the middle of the night to make sure they’re still on for tennis and gokarting next weekend

[streetlight-spam]

it’s monday i’m in the labyrinth

[streetlight-spam]

it’s tuesday i’m in the evil lab

[streetlight-spam]

it’s wednesday i’m in the time loop

[streetlight-spam]

it’s thursday i’m in the medieval torture apparatus

[streetlight-spam]

🌸it’s friday i’m in love🌸

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Me, tears streaming down my face, sobbing, as I stare at the stars: it’s just so beautiful

The medieval peasant I went back in time to give a bag of Doritos to, concerned: what terrible and powerful sorcerers they must have in your age, to be able to veil the vault of heaven itself from view, as you say

Me, sniffling: I didn’t realize, I can’t, it’s so much, I, I… are the chips good, at least?

Medieval peasant, trying to make me feel better: they’re… magical, strange traveler