as small as a world and as large as alone. @smilinghooks - Tumblr Blog

still can't believe this is the fucking year i got into sports. well, A sport. a singular sport.

#the hockey rpf powers are too strong for a fool such as i to resist

there's another dyke night next weekend and how am i gonna GO and drink fIVE MILLION BEERS if i have to pay VET BILLS goddamn it

tw pet death

at the fucking vet again staring at the wall thinking to myself "after this i will never get a cat again" because i was sure that this would be the time. this would be the time they would actually die, like all those times when they were kittens and i couldnt hear them and i thought "now they're dead. they were struck by lightning in the middle of my bedroom and they're dead." because i might be cursed? maybe? the curse that makes me sick in the head is also the curse that makes my cats die. maybe im not meant to have anything for myself, to give me comfort or stay in my bed at night. all these months of having my boys breathing into my ear and following my footsteps and falling asleep at my throat means that they're heading straight towards death fast fast fast faster than i run after them.

the guilt is eating me alive even though i'm sitting here now looking at them, alive but full of painkillers and antibiotics and antibacterial whatever the fuck.

if i never loved them none of them would be dead.

if they were never mine maybe they'd be out there in the world like my friends' cats, getting to be 15, 20 years old. not mine though. never mine.

#fucking sad and fucking anxious and going fucking crazy #tw pet death

shadowen

This is an anti-despair checkpoint! You must share something you're looking forward to before scrolling on.

#UUHHHHHHH im having Galentines drinks w my friends next weekend #and i signed up for speed dating on Valentine's day #idk if i'm gonna go through with it tho :|#OH MY MOM GAVE ME A GIFT CARD TO A SPA

here's what's going on in my life rn:

this morning i woke up to a strange cat under my bed. who knows how long he'd been there, but my own two cats did nothing about it??? defend this home guys

i just got back from the swimming pool, where i discovered that one of my new lobe piercings was missing its stud and was CRAZY swollen. what the fuck happened there

i scored an insane fb deal yesterday; two pieces of jewelry by an icelandic designer. got 455$ earrings + necklace for 165$!!!!

im on week ???? of heated rivalry induced psychosis. i cant think about anything else.

related: i've realised i want love soooo bad BUT i do nothing to get it or date anyone at all. crazy it took a gay hockey show to start thinking about this fr HAHA!!!!!

ANYwayyy

By some miracle there is an XLOV show here in Feb annnnndddd my friend and I waited too long to get tickets and now it's sold out :) how the fuck did that happen? this is Iceland babes

#there's a dyke night in feb im going to #im making it my mission to kiss

gotta admit that tumblr is a little bit overwhelming when you haven't used it innnnnnnn 7ish years. I NEED A YOUTUBE WALKTHROUGH. I NEED A TUTORIAL. I NEED A CLIPPY.

#just googled why i keep seeing the same posts over and over again in my feed??#like...new posts too but interspersed with the same couple of posts again and again??#im so confused

and what if I started using tumblr again. what then.

#im getting increasingly lonely in my fangirl mind palace

bearimy-dot

Brooklyn Nine-Nine Hiatus Creations:

week five → captain raymond holt

“C’mon, sir. The math thing isn’t the problem. Night shift’s keeping you and Kevin apart. You two just need to bone.”— s04.ep08 | Skyfire Cycle

#put this in the louvre

celinesart

Apr ‘17 | “strawberry jam” details: ig@facethesystem

#ahhhh....bitch #those brows look so nice why dont mine look so good when theyre untamed D:

flirtexo

JONGIN STANS LET ME HEAR U MAKE SOME NOISE

#is this FUCKING real #because i will one hundred percent perish

what’s up i hate my life lmao :)

some days are just so weird that i KNOW that if i weren’t on Drugz™ i would be drowning in my own tears. i feel like clawing off my skin im just so DEEPLY uncomfortable with myself and my life and my thoughts.

what the fuck am i even doing

#*my longest sigh ever*

femaleidol

180628 // BAAM

#SHE'S SO CUTE I LOVE HER #AND I LOVE MOMOLAND #yeonwoo #momoland #kpop

queereyegifs

The thing I love about you the most is that you’re brave. You’ve been through a lot and you put that behind you. You use it to not only make yourself successful, but to help others. You’re so, so brave. - The thing Bobby loves about Jonathan the most.

#yep i cried Real Tears