Alas, Poor Yorick! This Is Gonna Suck! (Rated T)
Summary: It’s been two years since the Apoca-didn’t and Aziraphale and Crowley still aren’t a couple - much to Crowley’s dismay. Aziraphale has his reasons, but Crowley doesn’t feel those apply to them. But if Aziraphale won’t listen to him on the subject, maybe he’ll listen to their good friend Shakespeare.
Crowley professes his love for Aziraphale through virtue of a single, passionate kiss and traumatizes a room full of pre-teens in the process. (2932 words)
Notes: Written for the tumblr inbox ask prompt - ‘Crowley and Aziraphale perform/inspire Shakespeare’
“Are we really going to do this?” Crowley groans, re-reading the flier Aziraphale had printed for his recent venture, one that he’s managed to strong-arm Crowley into participating in against his will and better judgement.
“Of course we are!” Aziraphale lightly punches Crowley on the shoulder in a gesture that makes the demon lean away suspiciously. “Buck up! It’s going to be fun!”
“Your definition of fun and my definition of fun seem to vary greatly, angel.”
“Look …” Aziraphale rounds up old rags and a bottle of wood polish and begins tidying up a space he has affectionately begun to refer to as his Globe Theater West “… we made a pledge …”
“You. You made a pledge.”
“… to help support youth theater in Soho. And putting on a performance of Shakespeare is the easiest way to start.”
“You could have donated the play books. That would have been easier.”
Aziraphale peeks up from the bookshelf he’s polishing and glares at the demon reclining a short distance away. “Bite. your. tongue. Besides, whether you realize it or not, we’ve been presented with a golden opportunity.”
“It seems an inordinate amount of young men signed up for my workshop as opposed to young women, so this gives us the perfect excuse to perform Shakespeare’s works the way they were done from the beginning.”
“In a large, open-air theater that smells like horse shit, where a handful of audience members die before the end of the second act?”
“No, where men play most of the roles, including the ladies’ parts.”
“That’s going to go over well.” Crowley chuckles. “Did you set aside enough money to pay for therapy and legal fees? ‘cause you might just need it.”