The Merriest Harlot In The Realm

The nicest bitch you’ll ever meet//pfp made jadedbugart and itsblobross

[snowwhitewithanxiety]

Hey! Looks like you found my blog! Welcome! Come on in and take a look around!

As I have been in the tumblr game for sixteen years and the fandom game for almost twenty, I will now give you a bit of a rundown on my blog and me in general, so you can decide whether you want to be neighbors or not. If you decide I'm not for you, that's coolio, the door is over there, please leave and don't look back or even let me know you are leaving. It's not that big a deal.

I'm a woman in my early 30s. Married. Has one kiddo. Works part time. A deconstructed Christian. Leftist and feminist. Bisexual. Spends a lot of time reading. Has a degree in history. That's all you need to know about my personal life.

More importantly I really love history, historical fiction, period pieces, fantasy novels, romance novels, horror novels, theology and Florence and the Machine.

Currently I'm super into ACOTAR (and have been for a little over a year), but I've also dabbled in various other fandoms over the years. I mostly got some traction in the Tudor history fandom for being a huge defender of George Boleyn and Jane Boleyn.

-I am a multishipper. If two characters have stood next to each other in a piece of media I have probably considered what their dynamic would be like as a romantic pairing, and if I haven't, I am one good fan fiction or fan art away from being sold. That being said; I tend to divide all ships in a fandom into the three categories of otp (fav), notp (am actively against this ship) or hell yeah brother (I ship it but it's not an otp)

So like....for example:

Otp: Elucien and Elain/Jesminda/Lucien

Notp: Elriel, Vassien and Tamcien

Hell Yeah Brother: Feycien, Gwynlain, Morlain, Lucnes, Vassa/Elain, Jurian/Lucien

-I love Cassian and Eris equally. I also ship Nessian and Neris. If you wanna yap about either or both ships I’m always down but I don’t tolerate putting down one for the other.

-this place is not a safe space for people who can’t handle Azriel being a messy bitch like he is in canon. My personal opinion on everyone’s favorite bat boy is that he is ruining his own life and letting others get hurt in the crossfire and we should let him be held accountable and made to reckon with himself instead of rushing to defend him every time he does something stupid (and also putting down a woman in the process generally).

-I love Elain Archeron. I love Nesta Archeron. Don’t come in here trying to put down one to raise up the other. That’s an instablock for me dog.

-Also don’t be talking to me about how shitty Feyre is to Lucien or vice versa. Feycien is forever my brotp and I am happiest when they are rage baiting each other because it’s their love language. It’s fine if you have thoughts that are nuanced about their relationship but leave me out of it. Thanks.

-We don’t make moral judgments about people based off their ships just their behavior. I have friends who are Elriels and I have friends who are Feylin and they are wonderful people (I even beta read an Elriel fic once.)

-My anons are currently open but only as a trial basis due to the recent influx of followers I have gotten.

Yes I write fan fictions. Yes I write them slow as hell. Leave me alone I have a kid and a job.

~Long Fics~

Earth, Wind and Fire

Rating: Explicit Pairing: Lucien/Elain/Jesminda Elain always thought that by marrying for power she would be able to free herself from her mother’s grasp. She never realized she might just be trading one cage for another….darker one, but that’s what she fears her life as the wife of Night Court’s High Lord would be. So in a desperate bid to escape she agrees to accept her long ignored mate bond with the exiled (and married) Autumn Prince Lucien Vanserra.

Flowers In Her Hair-Coming Soon. An Elucien WWII fic

ACOMAF (Lucien’s Version)-Coming Soon. A rewrite of ACOMAF, this time with 90 percent more Lucien and Nesta on a team building retreat.

Sleepless in Velaris-Coming Soon. An modern AU. Recently divorced career housewife Elain Archeron moves back to her hometown to try and start anew, reluctantly accepting the help of her sister's lifelong friend, recent widower, and retired rockstar turned anti war activist Lucien Vanserra.

Baby Makes Three-Coming Soon-A series of vignettes illustrate Lucien and Elain's rocky journey to becoming parents.

~One Shots~

Mate Bonds and Other Inconvenient Truths

Rating: Mature (Subject to Change) Pairing: Elain/Lucien Just a place to put my Elucien drabbles and one shots. Some short and sweet and others long and full of angst because…well it’s Elain and Lucien.

A Proper Farewell

Rating: M Pairing: Elain/Lucien When Elain finds a way to have Jesminda given a proper funeral, Lucien must grapple with his feelings of guilt and grief.

Bravery-Coming Soon. A look at Lucien’s childhood

Happily Never After-Coming Soon. Lucien meets Jesminda

The Moon On A String-Coming Soon. A Feycien one shot that takes place during Mist and Fury.

A Fluke of Nature

Rating: T Pairing: Elain/Lucien For Elucienweek 2026's prompt: Peak Yearning. Lucien observes Elain at a Spring Soiree.

The Beast You've Made of Me

Rating: M Pairing: Elain/Lucien For Elucienweek2026's prompt: Feral. Something snaps in Elain when Lucien suffers an injury.

[snowwhitewithanxiety]

Guys I know I’m like five days late to the party but I’m pretty sure I can answer who’s part of the Inner Circle, since I have this “Inner Circle” shirt I bought actually.

As you can clearly see, the Inner Circle consists of Feyre, Rhysand, Amren, Morrigan, Azriel, Cassian, Nesta, Elain and Lucien.

Source: trust me bro.

[snowwhitewithanxiety]

Me during a depressive episode: Man everything sucks.

*remembers @separatist-apologist ‘s Wonderland fic exists*

Me: damn you’re right everything is awesome actually!

[64mpg]

“what is the target audience of this post” what?????? does your diary have a target audience

[64mpg]

the target audience of all of my posts is me

[princess-lointaine]

frieda lepold

[mermaidemilystuff]

I survived a monday, and for what? tuesday? disgusting.

[baejax-the-great]

[milf--adjacent]

Let the historical record show that Mr. Beast was entirely ignorable if you were just like doing literally anything else. I've been on youtube as long as it's been around and I've never been recommended a video by him. I see him in passing as a meme. I thought he was a made up joke, a caricature of bad youtuber content miners until someone I trust confirmed his existence to me in late 2025.

[valtsv]

woman in a victorian novel: *develops a fever from worrying too much*

me, shivering and sweating with stress-induced anxiety: wtf that’s so unrealistic lol

[barbmayberry]

Zuhair Murad

Spring 2026

@zuhairmuradofficial

[asilentfrenzy]

here's the bummer for people who have deluded themselves into believing lucien isn't important or is just "an obstacle" for their ship

in my lifetime i have noticed that there are people who in general find most redheads unattractive and have weird biases against them (and whether people are conscious of their bias or not, there is real history backing this - this isn't me being ridiculous)

and then there are the people who go hard for redheads and are gonna make it known how down for them they are. kind of like the running joke about how people whose favorite color is purple are "purple people"

unfortunately for all of the people thinking that if they intentionally misrepresent lucien's character and wish upon enough stars that they will magically change the ACTUAL text, sarah is clearly on the side that loves a good redhead. she gushes about lucien, makes sure to describe him as hot as hell multiple times in the books, gives him significant roles and backstory. she recently added a new redheaded character into the mix that she writes favorably. and isn't the main character from her newer series a redhead? 🧐🧐

yep. sorry, friends. she's in camp redhead 🤷🏻‍♀️ and no amount of pretending is going to change that reality

[elainstulipgarden]

Yes! I love this.

She also loves Outlander and carried around a picture of Jamie Frasier (or some sort of mini Jamie) in her wallet. She mentioned this in an interview years ago. I can find the link if people are curious.

Sam Heughan was also mentioned in her TAR credits. Weird…I wonder why?

Oh. It’s because she loves redheads and takes inspiration from well known redheads for her characters.

Just because you can’t imagine yourself being attracted to a redhead doesn’t mean the author or most of her fans can’t imagine it.

Also just my opinion: Hot and sexy comes in all shapes, sizes, heights, facial features, skin tones, hair colors, genders, ect. Sexiness is just as much a vibe as it is physical. Having hard and fast rules about what physical features constitutes someone’s sexiness is very limiting and will lead to more dissatisfaction throughout life.

The least sexy thing you can do is be a hater.

[strandedlu11aby]

It’s crazy how the hunger games got turned into a love triangle story by the media when in the books katniss is like:

“Gale is my friend. We hunt together. He’s cool ig.”

“If peeta dies im gonna kill myself.”

[lucychanart]

higanbana 🌘

[kosmogrl]

mutuals, out of curiosity what season were you born in and what's your favorite season?

[snowwhitewithanxiety]

Sometimes I'm like "No Anna, you can't make Nyx's mate be the biological niece of Jesminda! That doesn't make sense!"

and then I remember its fan fiction and I can do whatever the fuck I want.

[decepticonsensual]

Not to be all "the children have forgotten the sacred texts!" but I just saw someone refer to a ship between two people who are good friends in canon as a crackship.

Hon. No. Crackship doesn't just mean "not canon". It's difficult to imagine two people who spend significant canon time together as a crackship. Crackship is when you write Galactus getting fucked by Tony the Tiger.

[decepticonsensual]

Gotta say, my absolute favourite notes on this so far have been the number of people congratulating Tony on his rebound from the Grinch.

[carygrantsbeard]

Me reading my mutuals’ blogs in the morning