“You’re so cute that I want to beat you up.”
“You’re not okay. Why do you act like you’re okay when you’re not?”
“I’m not acting cool. I am cool.”
“I bet she’d slap the person next to her for farting when she’s the one who farted.”
“I am so busy that I didn’t even remember that you didn’t call me for three days and thirteen hours.”
“I thought you were dumb, but I guess you’re not.”
“I can’t believe how much food she sent you. It’s not like a war’s breaking out.”
“So shut up and just live breathing through your silicone nose.”
“I know I shouldn’t be saying this to myself but I was really cool today.”
“Geez, you’re like the CSI. You’re sounding really smart.”
“You have no need to be sorry. You just need to shut your mouth.”
“Your existence is like a bomb.”
“Can I take a selfie right next to it?”
“What wrong have I ever done to you to make you pick on me like this?”
“If you like her so much, don’t just drool here. Go over there and drool on her too!”
“Can we pretend I beat you up?”
“I can’t bother you anymore so I’m going to bother everyone else.”
“How can you not like me? Are you on drugs?”
“Are you at a morgue? Do you need me to get you flowers?”
“Even though you have small eyes, you can see everything.”
“What if my chocolate abs melt?”
“Your shirt is see-through.”
“Would you like some chocolate milk?”
“Hey can you drive home like that?”
“Don’t threaten her to eat black bean noodles with you.”
“Why do you like horror movies so much?”
“I always have plans, I just don’t have the courage.”
“If I don’t trip you, then I can’t hold your hand to prevent your fall.”
“Leave my underwear here.”
“I don’t like seeing people eat food that looks better than mine.”
“Put your phone away and put your eyebrows down.”
“It was good to see you in my dream.”
“I hope you’re not having a hard time because of me.”
“Do you perhaps have another secret? Like you’re actually a girl?”
“You can get hurt more from people you’re closer with.”
“I have to look good when I go to the hospital.”
“You’re perfect the way you are to me.”
“You looked sexy eating ramen.”
“Everyone has their own fetish. I don’t judge.”
“If I had that, I wouldn’t have anything else to wish for.”
“There’s only one person who shares the same heartbeat as you. It’s your soulmate.”
“Should we listen to our heartbeats to see if we’re soulmates?”
“You’re such an asshole.”
“I don’t know why you make me feel this way.”
“Usually dating is when things that I can do by myself are done with another person.”
“Don’t treat us like idiots just because we’re stupid!”
“You should only touch me if it’s absolutely necessary.”
“What good is it to make a girl laugh 100 times if she always goes to the one who makes her cry?”
“They’re making fun of me because I don’t have a mom.”
“Your face requires revenge.”
“At first I just seem shabby like scrap paper, but after digging in deeper, I’m pretty awesome.”
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