Inner Thoughts @softsideofthesociopath-blog - Tumblr Blog

It’s March and I’ve never been happier. I still have my moments of depression, anger and anxiety but god you make me so happy. I never thought someone could just be so enamored by me. It’s all I ever wanted and you give it to me. I hope this works out. I hope you stay. I love you so much.

#march 2020 #personal #JAD

anxietyproblem

chessys

my husband of twenty years: i love you me: he’s just saying that to be nice

I’m starting to really like you. You make me so happy and I’m so afraid I’m not going to be everything you want. I’m afraid of you seeing I’m not as great as you think.

Please stay around for a while, please.

#personal #january 2020

I just don’t want to do any of this anymore. I’m just so tired.

#january 2020 #personal

Every month that passes I feel even more empty. I look at my body and just hate it. I feel like it’s just attacking me. If it isn’t vomiting blood, migraines or crippling chest pain, it’s something. Why is it so hard to have a baby? My body was made to do this. Women who are way more unhealthy and overweight than me have no problem. But I’m trying, I’m walking more, I’m dieting, I’m stressing myself out to be better and the universe just says NOPE. I mean you gotta have regular sex for that but my doctor could at least put me on my meds. ‘Lose more weight’ ‘your levels are too high’ ‘ cysts on your ovaries are too big’ then do something instead of telling me to lose weight. I’m just tired. I just want to create a life that’s going to love me and need me..I just wanna be happy

#january 2020 #personal

I’ve had a handful of amazing people enter my life since October and I’m so fucking afraid they’ll see I’m not as great as they think.

Im trying so hard to keep everyone around because I’ve lost so many people in the last two years. I don’t know why I’m so hard to love, even as a friend when I put everything I have into everyone.

I just want people to want me around. To miss me. To be happy.

#december 2019 #personal

nonbinary-adhd

do u guys ever get a vibe and ur immediately like "oh tonight is gonna SUCK" bc u can tell ur gonna end up self isolating or smth bc ur rsd activated... like u just feel a shift in ur brain vibes and u just kno that by the end of the night ur gonna feel like this

nourrice

my big ass heart is ruining me. Ruining me bitch

sonypraystation

how u doing

im not thinking about it

papegaaimusic

bob-belcher

thebootydiaries

An emotion: *pokes its head through the mountain of suppression I've buried it under*

Me, beating it with a stick: Back! Back!

onlytwitterpics

It’s been two months since I’ve heard from you Trey. It’s been weeks since I’ve heard from a couple of friends. I just feel like everyone is leaving me behind. I feel like no one cares about me anymore. I’m too much for anyone, I’m never going to be loved as much as I love some one. I’m always just a fucking place holder for someone until they find someone better. It doesn’t matter if I live closer or if it’s innocent or if you guys are just friends. Everyone starts out as just friends. Everyone starts out just innocent. Why can’t i be enough for someone? Why cant I just be fucking happy..

#November 2019 #personal

Almost two months later everything finally came out. I got the truth about you and it shook me to my core. The things these girls are saying that you did and said. The things you said about me. It hurts. I can’t believe you were this kind of person. But now I know at least I can get rid of your things and move on.

But in the late hours of the night I question. You never asked me for anything. You always seemed upset when I sent you things or when my account was charged. Were things different with me than those girls? Was I some how more special than her 10 years and her 4 years? Did I really make a difference? How much was a lie and how much was truth? Was any of it real?

Or were you just that good of a liar and a manipulator?

#blb3 #october 2019 #personal

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