Hello @sol8081 - Tumblr Blog

“I can not believe it took one person to destroy me One person to discard all of my trust for anyone One person to make me forget who my real friends were One person to banish me to the deepest parts of my mind One person to trick me into thinking that I should never say anything One person to make me think that I’m not worthy of anything One person to be so ignorant as to make me think it was all my fault”

— existential-words

furiousgoldfish

common abuser hypocrisies:

abuse is okay when i do it and nobody should feel compassion for my victim, however when it’s done to me it’s cruel and horrible and everyone should feel sorry for me

i am misunderstood, troubled, can’t properly control myself, and i just need a lot of patience and understanding, my victim however deserves none and needs to be in perfect control of their reactions and behaviour or i will abuse them even worse, and if they’re troubled and misunderstood it’s their own fault for getting themselves in that mess

i need my victim and they’re cruel and selfish if they leave, how could they do such a thing and hurt me like that, they’re heartless and vicious, however when i hurt them, a person who stays near me because i need them to, that is perfectly okay and the victim should suck it up and please me more

i decide what my victim deserves and how they should be treated, but they don’t get to decide anything about me, i am the most special person in the world and deserve only good things and to not be held accountable for bad shit i do ever, i get to decide this both for me and the victim and they have no say

whatever victim is feeling is to be dismissed and ignored because my feelings are the only ones that matter and that need to be talked about, victim’s point of view is not allowed and nobody except other abusers are allowed to say anything to me about how i treat them, i only want to hear encouragement and approval of my actions and any criticism will be attacked and suffocated and ridiculed

all the harm and fear i caused to my victim is not to be mentioned, we’re to pretend it never happened and i should get all the affection, respect, pleasing and love from the victim, however when i need to scare them into obedience or threaten and trigger them, then past should be brought up and they should be reminded of how cruel i can be if they wont obey

my victim deserves to get criticized for their appearance, actions, helplessness, weakness, insecurity, anxiety, mental illness and anything else i can find to hurt their perception of themselves, but the victim has no right to point out anything bad about me and needs to keep confirming that i am indeed perfect in comparison to them, and if they don’t i will hurt them worse

only the past moments in which i look good are allowed to be remembered or mentioned, anything else is to be instantly forgotten and buried in the past

i deserve endless compassion and sympathy, my victim deserves none, they’re to be held responsible for everything and anything i feel, they’re directly to take responsibility for my every whim and thought and feeling, I however am not responsible for anything they feel and all their reactions and feelings are completely their fault, they have to take responsibility for both me and themselves, while i am void of responsibility for anyone

all my actions are my victim’s fault and they must have provoked me if i did something cruel, i have to be given benefit of the doubt no matter what i do, my victim however, is to be scrutinized and their every step is to be taken as a provocation and aggression, even refusing to be beaten and abused and trying to get away or defend themselves is to be perceived as an aggression, even acting as a normal human being is to be seen but nothing else than provocation, they should act as i perceive them, and that is less than human being

remember when abusers talk shit while using these assumptions that they are wrong. They are responsible for everything they’ve done even when they want to pretend they’re not. They’re guilty of everything they do, even if they try to blame you. Nobody forces abusers to abuse others. They’re making a conscious choice to abuse. Never let them fool you and convince you it’s someone else’s fault, or that you should have compassion for them. Trust your own feelings and your own perception, because what they’re doing is wrong. You matter, no matter how much they try to deny it.

terefah

telling your kids that they can only ever trust family or that family is all they’ve got is the most toxic fucked up twisted manipulative shit and i would rather die than let myself believe that

memewhore

yeah-just-ignore-me-thanks

The only decent way to use white privilege

36epm

Shoutout to Percy Jackson for being a kids book that straight up murdered the abusive step dad instead of doing some bullshit redemption arc where they have to forgive him

aethersea

actually you know what’s especially cool? it’s a retelling of a myth in which perseus straight-up murders his abusive stepdad, and in this version the Big Change there was that instead, he gave his abused mom the opportunity to do the murder herself, on her own terms, when she was good and ready, which was very cash money of rick riordan if I do say so myself

paprika

mydaywithd-deactivated20180408

Julie D’Aubigny was a 17th-century bisexual French opera singer and fencing master who killed or wounded at least ten men in life-or-death duels, performed nightly shows on the biggest and most highly-respected opera stage in the world, and once took the Holy Orders just so that she could sneak into a convent and shag a nun.

(via Feminism)

bookshop

bisexual opera singer who killed ten men and snuck into a convent to shag a nun.

allyitis

Just so y'all know, she later set that convent on fire so she and that nun could sneak out. And she seduced one of the men she’d dueled.

johannesviii

Mademoiselle de Maupin (Julie d’Aubigny) has always been one of my role models. I’m so glad this post exists so more people can learn about her. The more you know, the more there’s to love. Let’s see:

Around 1678 (she was like fourteen or fifteen), she was making a living in Marseilles by doing fencing exhibitions, dressed in male clothes, with her boyfriend who was on the run because he killed a guy in an illegal duel in Paris.

Then she joined an opera company and fell in love with a young woman, but the woman’s parents decided to put her in a convent to, you know, protect her honor and all that…

…so yeah, that’s when the whole “sneaking into a convent to help a nun sneak out and also putting the room on fire” thing happened.

She wounded a guy through the shoulder with a sword in a duel because he had made fun of her clothes. They became friends after she came back a few days later to ask if he was okay.

She beat a singer who was quite famous at the time because he was being a jerk to some women from her new opera troupe in Paris.

She kissed a young woman in front of everyone at a society ball, and that angered three noblemen who were there, so she beat them all in duel and fled to Brussels. Then she resumed her opera career there.

Then she returned to the Paris opera and had yet more problems with the law because she beat up her landlord.

She retired to a convent after the death of her love Madame la Marquise de Florensac, and died at only 33 years old.

The legend says that she never got arrested for all her deeds because king Louis XIV thought she was way too entertaining to deserve death. I have no idea if that’s true. But she did sing in Versailles for the Court, so there’s that.

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

She’s back on my dash!

The woman who is, no word of a lie, MY PERSONAL HERO :D

christopher-bryant

How badass can you be to basically get a lifetime pardon from the king?!

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

Julie D’aubigny: It’s okay I have a note from the king

“Julie can do what she wants - King Louis XIV”

mynowherenothing

Sword fights are HOT anyone who thinks otherwise can get out of my face

vin-studies

ok guys. these past two years were HELL so here are some NO BULLSHIT TIPS that i wish i could tell my 16 year old self when i first started IB

ENGLISH AND BIO ARE NOT ‘EASY’ HLS. Biology HL has an extensive syllabus and the marking criteria for English HL are very high! Properly look into your universities’ requirements - make sure to contact them and ask if they will accept the subjects you’re planning to take for the course you are applying for. (For example, some medicine courses in some universities don’t even require biology but they expect you to take chemistry, physics and maths HL). No HL is an ‘easy HL’ so make sure you choose something that you need or are interested. Note: to prospective/new students, IB requires a minimum of a total of 12 marks from your 3 HLs in order to pass the diploma program.

FINISH CAS ASAP Those CAS projects may look good on your uni applications and CVs but writing reflections and uploading evidence is a pain in the ass. I made the mistake of uploading everything at the last moment and in consequence, I had lost some of the pictures that I had collected as evidence and didn’t have time to request for certificates for some of my activities. Upload everything as soon as you get done with a particular activity - if you’re volunteering, training, coaching, competing, interning: don’t forget to collect certifications / evidence from the coordinators/coaches/parents that you have finished the said number of hours. Get CAS out of sight out of mind as soon as possible (collecting as much CAS as possible during your first year of IB is also beneficial for students who plan to apply to universities that have applications due early).

TOK IS A WASTE OF TIME I know this, you know this, even your TOK teachers know it. But it has to be done - so make things easier on yourself.

TOK PRESENTATION: First, choose a topic that you genuinely enjoy and know a lot about - a topic that you can talk about from the top of your head. This will help you while doing the actual presentation so that you feel more comfortable relaying your ideas and so it does’t end up becoming 10 minutes of you just saying words that you memorised. Your teacher and people online might say that having a partner will make the presentation easier, but in reality this depends on your subject. If your subject is vast, take a partner so the information can be shared amongst the 20 minutes that you have. If your topic is not as vast or does not have a lot of information, don’t take a partner. It may be a little scary to do it on your own but at the end of the day, 10 minutes of quality TOK material is better than 20 minutes of added information and irrelevant points just so you can reach the time limit.

TOK ESSAY: Essay titles are released in the early months of your second year - your TOK teachers will most likely discuss each and every title in class so that you have a better understanding of what they’re talking about. Here’s the secret to the TOK Essay: PICK THE EASIEST ONE. No examiner is going to give you extra marks because you picked a harder title over an easier title - its about the way you present the answer. Choose the title that you understand the most because if you understand it, the way you’ll write your essay will be clear and chances are, the examiner will understand it too. Choosing a title that you’re not familiar with, just because it looks impressive, will send you down a spiralling staircase of pretentious word vomit. In class, when we were looking through sample high scoring TOK essays, most of them were simple and easy to understand. Most of these high scoring essays depended on examples and real-life situations to explain their claims and counterclaims. Your TOK essay does not need to be a philosophical monologue!!

EXTENDED ESSAY: The daunting 4000 words that has every new IB student quaking in their pants. The biggest tip I can give you is this: DON’T TRY TO CHALLENGE YOURSELF BY PICKING A DIFFICULT SUBJECT. IF YOU DO NOT PASS YOUR EXTENDED ESSAY, YOU DO NOT GET YOUR DIPLOMA. YOUR UNIVERSITY DOES NOT CARE ABOUT NOR DO THEY CHECK THE SUBJECT YOU DO YOUR EE ON. There are obviously easier EE subjects that you will be able to score high marks in like: LanguageB, Business Management, etc. Now, you might say that any subject is easy if you enjoy it - sure, that may be true but that doesn’t change the fact that some subjects have higher standards and harder criteria: Physics, Chemistry, Maths HL. New students, don’t freak out about writing 4000 words - in reality, once you start writing your EE, you’ll find that you’ve exceeded your limit and you’ll be stuck trying to figure out how to cut it so it doesn’t affect the quality of your work.

DON’T BE EMBARRASSED ABOUT TAKING ESS OR MATH STUDIES. Anyone who makes fun of ESS and Math Studies students, stop it, its gross. If your university does not need Maths Standard/Higher level, don’t feel like you need to take them. If you find SL difficult and you feel you could score higher in Math Studies, take it. At the end of the day 7 in MS is better than a 4 in SL. Commerce students, if your school requires you to take one science, take ESS. Its practical, less time consuming, and genuinely very interesting. The internal assessment difficulty ranges depending on your topic: some need more experiment time than others but overall its significantly less than any other science like Biology or Chemistry or Physics. Its easy scoring, in case your university is looking at your overall score out of 45 rather than your subjects separately. Taking IB is a feat in itself, so making things a little easier for yourself is nothing to be ashamed about. (plus It’ll be you who’ll be laughing once exams arrive and your pg is a 7).

IOC TIPS: annoy the hell out of your teacher - steal them away for practice IOCs whenever you can. the more practice sessions you have, the better you’ll understand what you’re doing right/wrong, the time you reach, and the questions that you might get at the end of your commentary. if your teachers don’t give you the time of day, practice with the help of a friend or even to your own reflection in the mirror - sometimes your points might make sense on paper but not out loud and you’ll never find out which points those are until you’re talking about them. if its possible to opt, try to avoid poets BECAUSE you don’t know which poem you’ll draw on the final IOC recording day and each poem have their own story, writing style, and concepts. extracts from novels and short story collections on the other hand, have the same context, characters, writing style no matter which extract you draw. During your recording, you can connect your extract to other chapters/stories that you have learnt about if it supports the concept you’re talking about - unlike poems that talk about different topics so you cannot.

BM - CUEGIS CONCEPTS & CASE STUDY (P1):

Despite these being two very big parts of the final exams, there are only a few tips I can share.

For CUEGIS, choose an MNC because it’ll be easier for you to find information. Don’t mug up, choose a company you have an interest in. If you did your IA or Extended Essay on an MNC, you probably have some extent of knowledge about the company so use it for your CUEGIS essay. In preparation, just divide what you know and learn about the company into each concept and learn how they affect each other. Write practice essays by picking two random concepts with a random business topic.

For Paper 1, your teacher should discuss the given case study with you and helped your class analyse it. But, you should always go back and read/analyse the case by yourself, with friends, with other business students from other schools to make sure nothing is left untouched. You cannot use past papers because, obviously, their cases were different. So, if your teachers does not make sample exam questions / mock papers, make them for yourself. From simple things like definitions to evaluating decisions using business tools.

last but not least, don’t be afraid to drop ib if you really cannot take it anymore. There will always be universities or colleges that accept your high school diploma. At the end of the day, your mental health is more important that any 45. good luck! - my ask box is always open for anyone who needs tips, guides, resources, notes, or just want to rant with me about IB in general :)

your-health-hazard

leohearts

We were just friends. That spoke like lovers. And that seemed to be enough.

(via leohearts)

books-n-quotes

“Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.”

— Deborah Reber, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul (via books-n-quotes)