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@sosoadvice
Hey! Im the same type of blog as you, i just started this blog and Im new i was wondering if you could give me a shoutout so I can get started? Ive aways wanted to help people and I feel like we can all do that through our blogs, thanks in advance :)
I can't answer ALL of your questions. Give them a look.
Simple and Clean.
“I (female) really want to see my boyfriend have sex with another guy. He is willing. What are safety precautions we can take?”
Number 1. Consent. Number 2. Protection. Number 3. Safe and secure place. Number 4. Lube.
“I met this boy at the end of the year, he goes to the same high school as me, he was a friend of my friend, we could only talk for 3 days because we were in the same production at school. He has no social media or anything either, and after the 3 days of the show we were in together, he never talked to me again and my friend who is also friends with him is moving away. I have no way of talking to him and i have a GIANT crush on him but im extremely shy and don’t know what to do, any advice??”
Talk to him when you go back to school?
“I feel like it’s so easy for people to pick me up an out me down whenever they want. I don’t want to be used anymore. How do I stand up for myself without losing them?”
Talk to them about it and tell them how you feel, but if they don’t see your point or don’t seem to take it seriously, let them go. No one is worth enough to be used and mistreated.
"I have the biggest crush on a guy who is kind of obsessed with Ariana Grande, how do I get over him?"
Every time you think about him or how attractive he is, think about the fact that he loves Ariana Grande. You'll be over him soon.
“So, I have a boy problem. There is this guy and he is constantly saying things like "I would rather be with you" or "I want you" and saying that he really likes/loves me. Also saying that he would like it if I was his girl friend. As well as blatantly flirting with me, which wouldn't be necessarily a horrible thing. Besides the fact that he has a girl friend through all of this. I don't know what to do. Should I just ignore him?”
If he’s making you uncomfortable, you should tell him. He definitely sounds like an asshole to say the least and you don’t have to take any of his crap.
“When I'm partner and I got to together we had sex nonstop. Months down we've had sex less because I don't want to. I'm feeling bad or just not in the mood. My partner then feels rejected and they think it's something they are doing wrong and feel useless. It's nothing they are doing and I'm Genuinely not feeling well. I've just been stressed a lot. When I'm stressed it effects me emotionally and physically. I can't help it. They don't want to force me or make me feel guilty but I can't help it.”
Talk to them about it and make sure you’re on the same page about why you haven’t had sex. Be honest with them. Everyone deals with stress differently, but being constantly stressed for a long amount of time is awful for your physical and mental health. I suggest doing your research to find what stress relieving activity works best for you.
“hey, my significant other hasn't been talking to me at all the past 3 or 4 months, when I try to talk to them, they just say "oh I just don't feel like talking to anyone.." and that can't be completely true, they're on tumblr and Skype everyday.. It's long distance, so we can't really see each other, and this has taken a serious toll on my mental and emotional health.. is this neglectful? should I try and end the relationship? I'm really scared, I've been with them so long, I don know what to do”
Yes. This is completely and totally neglectful. If your s.o. won’t talk to you, you should text/call/whatever them and end it. You don’t deserve to be stuck waiting for them until they decide they want to commit to a relationship.
“My boyfriend and I have been in a committed relationship and living together for the past year. Many times he's asked me to have a threesome with another girl because he feels he hasn't had sex with as many people as I have, but I kept telling him no, I don't want to. So now since he's asked me for the hundredth time, I've given him a "hall pass" (as he wants to call it) but now I see him scrolling on tinder and its honestly making me really depressed. Did I fuck up? Do you think I'm losing him?”
He’s a dirtbag. Don’t feel bad for not wanting to have a threesome and definitely don’t let him try to make you feel guilty. Just because he asked doesn’t mean you owe anything to him. You should break it off.
“I think my bf is the biggest sweetheart but I think he is way too clingy? He gets sad if I don't text him back right away (literally right away) and he sends me mushy gushy love texts ALL the time to the point that it doesn't mean that much, and he keeps repeating himself. I want to have space sometimes, but he takes it personally. Also I want to talk about other things like science, business, life, etc. Instead of him just telling me how much he loves me all the time.”
This is a completely normal and logical concern to have. Space is necessary for relationships to flourish. You should talk to him and tell him how you feel. Let him know that it isn’t personal, but that you sometimes just feel like he’s suffocating you. Just try to be gentle.
“So I had a girlfriend for three years and then one day we just stopped talking, I picked up a job working away and kinda just hide from my feelings, but once I got back I couldn't help my self but want to see her. I told her how I felt and she replied to me " I love you and will always be there for you if you need me" Since then it has felt like we are more friends then anything else. Is there any way I can try and put this train wreck back on the tracks? she leaves for the army in 2 weeks.”
It sounds like maybe you should try moving on. If you told her how you felt and she doesn’t feel responsive, she might not feel it as much anymore.
On a Tinder Crush.
“i was on tinder, met a guy, we talked for awhile, but it ended because he was on a summer internship & said he was going to be busy once school started. however, he said he still wanted to be friends. we're friends we've been talking throughout the summer on & off. a couple weeks ago i asked him if he ever thought about having a redo but i already felt the answer was going to be no. he said he was seeing someone. he kept apologizing & he felt bad for not telling me about it but i kept telling him that it was okay & it wasn't a big deal. i do want to be friends with him but now i just feel really lonely & wanting that attention of a guy so i went on meetme & i can't help but think that i am being desperate. a part of me wants to tell this guy that i don't want to be just friends but on the other hand i feel like maybe that's just as good as its gonna get with us. honestly, i just don't know what to do. & i don't know why i feel this way. whats the best thing i can do?”
It isn’t weird or desperate to go on Meetme if you want to meet someone. Those sites are made for people who are interested in meeting other people romantically and platonically. If he’s seeing someone or he isn’t interested in anything else romantic right now, there isn’t really much you can do other than try and get over him. Good Luck. What Do You Think?
On Suicide.
“I've been thinking of suicide recently. The thought used to occur to me before but I'd brush it off. These days it's every second thought i have. I feel unloved, unwanted, new levels of lonely and anxious. Nobody i thought would be there is there...”
DON’T DO IT. I can’t get across how important it is to me that you not commit suicide. Everyday is a struggle. I know that very well, but I promise it gets better! it’s hard to even imagine right now, I know, but I swear to GOD that it’ll happen. Maybe even sooner than you think. Life isn’t easy, but you’re going to come out of this so much stronger than you could have ever imagined and you’re going to be so happy one day! Please please PLEASE talk to someone here, here, or here and know that YOU ARE WORTH LIFE. Don’t ever let ANYONE including yourself let you feel like you aren’t. I know that it isn’t easy or simple and you’re not going to wake up tomorrow morning and never feel this way again just because you’ve told yourself that you’re worth it, but you deserve to please just give yourself a chance to live and thrive! It is NEVER too late. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don’t do this.
I'm turning anonymous off!
Just until I can get the messages in my inbox down. You'll still be able to send me messages off anon (which will 100% of the time be answered privately) until I turn it back on so keep sending your questions in!
Hi, um, do you answer any asks privately?
Any non-anonymous asks i answer privately.
Simple and Clean.
“Does anal hurt for the first time? How do you make it not hurt as bad”
Yes; lube. Otherwise it kind of is what it is. Take it slow.
“this guy in my friend group likes me and is trying to force (not really forced) me in to a realtionship but i am not ready for a relationship also i just want to stay friends and i don’t want him to say i got friend zoned because its not a real thing”
Who cares what he says (or feels, for that matter). You walk right up to his face and tell him you don’t like him like that. He can call it what he wants, but just because he’s interested in you doesn’t mean you all of the sudden owe him something.
“Went to the mall. Hung out with my bestie and 2 guys. Guy number 2 asked for my number and we’ve been talking. But he has a girlfriend so I know we’re just friends. My friends think something’s going on. He can ask for my number and still be platonic right?”
Unless you plan on sexting him any time soon, you can tell your friends to chill.
“So I recently moved into a new street and there this really cute guy and I want to ask him for his number but I have know idea how to ask him. I only see him in the mornings and afternoons as we catch the same bus. I need help ASAP”
Sit next to him on the bus, ask him about himself/compliment him (i.e. if he’s wearing a band t shirt, say you like that band [only if you know something about them though] ) Or just be like “hey you live down the street from me right?” and then introduce yourself.
“So I’ve been seeing my be for 8 months and we had been a thing for 6 months before that. He’s been I’m a threesome before and me half. But now I’m getting more and more curious about it. Do guys go for this when they’re in relationships?”
It depends on the guy. If he’s been in one before and he enjoyed it, than he might go for it. Talk to him about it.
“When new people meet my bf they assume he’s gay. If he was, i wouldn’t mind. We wouldn’t be together, but I’d love him the same as now. What bothers me is that they’re implying we’re not seen as a match to everyone else, that I’m not his type. Yknow?”
Next time sone says that, just rip into them about enforcing gender stereotypes.
“I had a bump on my vagina lip that for a few days and me assuming it was a pimple I put toothpaste on it and the next morning when I woke up the bump was gone and there was an open sore I don’t know if I caused you to putting toothpaste on it and it irritated the skin or if i have some form of infection…”
First thing, probably don’t rub toothpaste on your snatch. Secondly, if it looks/seems/feels concerning, get it checked out.
“Falling in love so deeply with an amazing guy from Kentucky…I’m from no where near there. My parents would never let me go visit him and/or allow him to come here. I don’t turn 18 for a few years, and I don’t think we’d be able to hold on long enough until then. Please help me.”
Sadly, you two should probably call it quits. You’re really young and, while I’m sure this guy seems like he’s your forever right now, he won’t matter in 3 years.
“i feel like this is pretty stupid to ask but should i get mad at my boyfriend if he likes other girls pictures on instagram or any social media?”
No. That’s childish.
“I started to date a co worker. 3 good dates happened so far still no kiss :(. he now is 2500+ miles away on a family trip he texted me when he was leaving saying he misses me already and can’t wait to see me. . he’s is definitely into me right???”
You already know the answer to this question, but you appear to need validation. Yes, he’s into you.
“So I go to an all girl school and I love my female friends and all but I want guy friends, not necessarily to date but just to know and hang out with, how do I meet guys and where? I’m too old to start joining clubs and stuff”
I have no knowledge of your area or your surroundings so, other than online, I don’t have an answer for you.
“My bf had this obsession over not having our first kiss cuz he wants it to be “special” so everytime we saw eachother we didnt kiss. Today tired of waiting so i just kissed him and it wasnt great cuz i was mad Do u think he wishes it never happened?”
I would suggest asking him about that. Also acknowledge that you were wrong for kissing him when you knew that he wanted to save his kiss for a special time. Dick move.
Simple and Clean.
“Does anal hurt for the first time? How do you make it not hurt as bad”
Yes; lube. Otherwise it kind of is what it is. Take it slow.
“this guy in my friend group likes me and is trying to force (not really forced) me in to a realtionship but i am not ready for a relationship also i just want to stay friends and i don't want him to say i got friend zoned because its not a real thing”
Who cares what he says (or feels, for that matter). You walk right up to his face and tell him you don’t like him like that. He can call it what he wants, but just because he’s interested in you doesn’t mean you all of the sudden owe him something.
“Went to the mall. Hung out with my bestie and 2 guys. Guy number 2 asked for my number and we've been talking. But he has a girlfriend so I know we're just friends. My friends think something's going on. He can ask for my number and still be platonic right?”
Unless you plan on sexting him any time soon, you can tell your friends to chill.
“So I recently moved into a new street and there this really cute guy and I want to ask him for his number but I have know idea how to ask him. I only see him in the mornings and afternoons as we catch the same bus. I need help ASAP”
Sit next to him on the bus, ask him about himself/compliment him (i.e. if he’s wearing a band t shirt, say you like that band [only if you know something about them though] ) Or just be like “hey you live down the street from me right?” and then introduce yourself.
“So I've been seeing my be for 8 months and we had been a thing for 6 months before that. He's been I'm a threesome before and me half. But now I'm getting more and more curious about it. Do guys go for this when they're in relationships?”
It depends on the guy. If he’s been in one before and he enjoyed it, than he might go for it. Talk to him about it.
“When new people meet my bf they assume he's gay. If he was, i wouldn't mind. We wouldn't be together, but I'd love him the same as now. What bothers me is that they're implying we're not seen as a match to everyone else, that I'm not his type. Yknow?”
Next time sone says that, just rip into them about enforcing gender stereotypes.
“I had a bump on my vagina lip that for a few days and me assuming it was a pimple I put toothpaste on it and the next morning when I woke up the bump was gone and there was an open sore I don't know if I caused you to putting toothpaste on it and it irritated the skin or if i have some form of infection...”
First thing, probably don’t rub toothpaste on your snatch. Secondly, if it looks/seems/feels concerning, get it checked out.
“Falling in love so deeply with an amazing guy from Kentucky...I'm from no where near there. My parents would never let me go visit him and/or allow him to come here. I don't turn 18 for a few years, and I don't think we'd be able to hold on long enough until then. Please help me.”
Sadly, you two should probably call it quits. You’re really young and, while I’m sure this guy seems like he’s your forever right now, he won’t matter in 3 years.
“i feel like this is pretty stupid to ask but should i get mad at my boyfriend if he likes other girls pictures on instagram or any social media?”
No. That’s childish.
“I started to date a co worker. 3 good dates happened so far still no kiss :(. he now is 2500+ miles away on a family trip he texted me when he was leaving saying he misses me already and can't wait to see me. . he's is definitely into me right???”
You already know the answer to this question, but you appear to need validation. Yes, he’s into you.
“So I go to an all girl school and I love my female friends and all but I want guy friends, not necessarily to date but just to know and hang out with, how do I meet guys and where? I'm too old to start joining clubs and stuff”
I have no knowledge of your area or your surroundings so, other than online, I don’t have an answer for you.
“My bf had this obsession over not having our first kiss cuz he wants it to be "special" so everytime we saw eachother we didnt kiss. Today tired of waiting so i just kissed him and it wasnt great cuz i was mad Do u think he wishes it never happened?”
I would suggest asking him about that. Also acknowledge that you were wrong for kissing him when you knew that he wanted to save his kiss for a special time. Dick move.
On Tinder.
“So I've been dating this guy exclusively for 5 months. I've been his girlfriend for just over a month.. yesterday I found out he still has tinder. He immediately deleted it and swears it meant nothing. I made him take me home&made it pretty clear this is essentially a deal breaker for me. He swears it was just out of bordum & for a confidence booster. but I feel grossly inadequate, disrespected and like he couldn't possibly be who I thought he was.”
You need to talk to him. You need to sit him down and have a serious conversation with him about what was going on with his Tinder. But here’s the key: YOU need to stay calm about it and have an open mind. Don’t go into it already knowing he’s cheated on you and just waiting for him to confess because the truth is: You have no idea whether he did or not. Depending on what he says, you have two options: You can either choose to believe him, or you can choose not to. However, if you choose to believe him, you have to commit to it. Don’t hold it in his face or bring it up every time you get mad. On the contrary, if you choose not to believe him, just end it right there because a relationship without trust is a relationship that’s doomed to fail. (Side note: It isn’t completely far-fetched that he would make a Tinder out of sheer boredom. Many people do that. It is kind of interesting. Just be sure to express your feelings about the app) Good Luck. What Do You Think?
On Accidental Oral.
“So me and my boyfriend have been dating for about 1 1/2 years, we have had sex before, twice but that was when we'd been together for about 8 months. I recently changed my views on sex when I started getting more involved with my church and in religion so we discussed not having any more kind of sexual intimacy because k wanted to commit to a second virginity and he was totally okay with it. But last week we were together, and things ended up happening. We didn't actually have sex but oral happened. I felt it was wrong but I didn't stop it, halfway through I told him I didn't want it and I started crying so he stopped, but now I can't even look at him or let him touch me because I know we did something we shouldn't have and he knew how I really felt about doing anything and right before we hung out he even promised me nothing at all would happen.”
It’s totally normal to not want to touch him or do anything with him because of what happened, however, I think two things are very important here. Number one, don’t beat yourself up about this. It happened, you made a small mistake. You learned from it. Don’t kill yourself over it. Number two, you can’t fully blame him for this. Yes, he knew what you felt about the situation before it happened, but so did you. Unless he pressured you into doing something you didn’t want to, you both made the conscious effort to go as far as you did. My best advice here is to talk with him about it. If you feel too uncomfortable about him now, it’s okay to take a break for a while until you’ve figured everything out, but you have to communicate that to him, otherwise the situation may get messy. Good luck.
On....?
“So theres this guy and he says he likes me but doesnt wanna date bla bla bla whatever. anyways... we hook up and he mentions how he LOVES eating ass... and honestly i tried it. but heres the weird part. hes SO into it and wont eat a girl out because he says hes had "some weird experiences" and prefers not to... but i go no four play .. ony the rim job.. is he gay?? im just confused here... thanks”
I would be less concerned about his sexuality and more concerned about whether or not you actually like having sex with him. If not, don’t have sex with him anymore. If so, tell him how you feel about the fact that it sounds like he just isn’t great at it. Tell him you need more foreplay. It’ll be awkward, but you deserve to enjoy the sex just as much as he does. Try to be gentle about it.
On a Neglectful Boyfriend.
“Hi. I don’t know who else to turn to. I knw this seems like a small problem but I’ve been seeing this guy for more than a year now and I’m really happy with him. I feel like I can be myself. But lately, he doesn’t reply much and barely has anytime left for me. And just a while ago, I confessed about how I’m having doubts and that I love him but I’m just not sure about the thing between us. I poured everything out and all he said was ‘Oh’ and that he was buying pants. I’m confused. And torn.”
Sit him down and talk to him. Like set up a time for you two to meet up somewhere and talk about it. Be open and honest with him, tell him how you feel, but you don’t owe him anything. If he’s not responsive or if he doesn’t seem genuinely interested in your feelings, end it. You deserve someone who will take you and your feelings seriously. There are plenty of people in the world who you’ll find and you can be yourself with. You don’t have to stay with this ass because you’re comfortable.
On an Oblivious Boyfriend.
“My bf & I have been together for quite a while now and I've been thinking about having sex with him. Im a virgin and he's not. Ive gave him hints that I'm ready and he doesn't notice it. Then I finally just asked him why he hasnt tried to have sex with me the other night and he said he wasnt in the mood to do it. I feel extremely rejected and hurt. Now I'm questioning everything in our relationship. I dont know what to do. Do I tell him how I feel or just wait & see what happens?”
You tell him how you feel. it sounds like he’s pretty oblivious to your advances, so don’t feel too bad about his honesty. Just because he wasn’t in the mood the other night, doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to have sex with you. Just talk to him, tell him how you feel and see how it goes. Good luck.
Simple and Clean.
“My boyfriend won't eat me out unless I'm freshly shaven but I always give him blow jobs. What do I do?”
Refuse to give him blowjobs unless he’s freshly shaven.
“So my boyfriend was wearing boxers and I was wearing undies only although they may have slipped and my undies were very wet. He was on top of me but he didn't ejaculate. Is there is possibility I could be pregnant? (From pre-cum if there was any)”
It’s very likely that your underwear was wet from your own genitals, or possibly from sweat. If he didn’t get off inside of you, you probably aren’t pregnant, but you know your body better than anyone else. If you feel like it’s a possibility, you should check.
“My boyfriend wants me to be more aggressive while we make out and I was wondering if you had any tips that I could use to turn him on even more. Thank you”
Pull his hair and blame him for the failing economy.
“It's been 3 years since i last saw my ex and 4 since we broke up and im still not over him. he promised me to call and never did. idk what to do but it still hurts”
You let that shit go. He was a dick to you, and now he gets to be out there living his life, not even concerned about you. You don’t deserve to be stuck in this rut he left you in. You deserve a full, beautiful life.
“There's this guy who I'm talking to, but he's not 100% like he barely replies and when he does it takes over an hour or even days. I don't know if I should just leave him alone or confront him. please help.”
He seems uninterested. Do with that what you will, but I would probably just leave it alone.
“Hi, Im not sure if I want to be with my boyfriend anymore.. Recently it just feels like I cant wait to get away from him and theres barely any contact eventhough we live together. But im insure whether this is just a phase or not..”
Talk to him about it. If you don’t feel like the relationship can be salvaged, you should let it go. Don’t feel guilty. This stuff happens.
“I went to gay pride yesterday. There was a parade and there were multiple people watching from their roof tops. Someone started to throw down condoms and I was able to get a majority of what they threw. Do you think the condoms are safe?”
I would thoroughly inspect them before doing anything with them. Though, my general idea would be “anything thrown at me by some random stranger from a rooftop is likely not something I want to have a ton to do with” but you never know.
“I liked this guy a while ago and didn't tell anyone. Then, one of my close friends started dating him and I never tell her about how I felt about him. They're broken up now, but I feel like I have no chance with him because she still has feeling for him. I don't want to ruin a friendship over a guy. What should I do?”
Is this guy really worth ruining a friendship over?
“So I've never given a blowjob before but I was planning on giving my bf one for his bday next week. Can u give me some advice or like tricks or something I can do? And also how long does it have to last? Until he cums??”
If you’re not going to have sex, then yeah, until he cums. If you are, no.
“I recently read some things where if you have fantasies about girls, you could be bisexual. I always thought it was just fantasies and curiosity since I've never experienced anything with a girl or developed romantic feelings for a girl. May seem stupid but I'm just trying to figure it out lol.”
Don’t rush to label yourself. I would say to stay open minded and whatever happens, happens. You can go from there.
“How can I tell if a guy likes me through text?”
Ask him.
“Do you think it's ever a good idea for the person who was dumped to ask the person who dumped them for a second chance or should it always be the only person who did the dumping can suggest to get back together?”
It honestly depends on the situation and why you broke up. However, if you have real feelings for them, you should go for it. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion hold you back.
On a Taken Crush.
“Last night I was at a party with my best friend who I've had on and off feelings for, for about two years, he's in a pretty unhappy relationship and is waiting for his girlfriend to come back from holiday to be able to talk to her properly about how he feels. Anyway, he found out last night that I still like him and we were drinking and having a bit of a mess about and it got to the point when it was just us two awake, and at some point he started to kiss me - and I kissed him back -I feel gross”
It’s totally normal to feel gross about what happened between the two of you. It’s actually great that you do, because it shows that you know you made a mistake. The next step is to forgive yourself for it. You were drunk, it was an accident, it happened. Make sure you talk to him about it and see how he feels. Know that how he handles this says a lot about his character and his integrity. Don’t beat yourself up for this, and don’t let him beat himself up either, but pay attention to whether or not he takes any responsibility for it or not, specifically with his girlfriend. What Do You Think?
On a Tumblr Crush.
“I have a tumblr crush, and we're acquitances (in the same fandom) we have been following each other for like 2 years and once in a while talked but never had an entire conversation. I just developed this crush and I want him to notice me but without being too creepy or pushy. When I send him asks or respond on his posts he just answers with short replies (since our "relationship of acquitances" have always being like this). Should I be more direct?”
Yikes. Tumblr crushes are a really rough situation. My best advice is definitely to be more direct. Of course it’s rough because of the human psyche’s natural fear of rejection, but think about it this way: If he doesn’t feel the same way, you literally NEVER have to talk to him again, or even see him. It’s easier than knowing him in person in that way. Good luck. What Do You Think?
On Getting Back an Ex.
“As an adult, child abuse survivor, its caused me to have clinical depression. My mood swings, though unintentional, took a toll on my bf and he broke up with me for it. I was confused because he never expressed how it effected him while we were together so I didnt know it was that much of a problem. He cut off contact for a while and ive gotten help for my emotions and weve been talking again recently. He says he wants me back but then pushes me away in fear of getting hurt again. What do I do?”
Honestly tell him to make up his mind. You may have put him through some things, sure, but you don’t have to take his back and forth. Be honest with him. tell him how you feel about him and tell him that you’ve gotten help. If he cares about you and understands the situation, he’ll be patient and give it another shot. However, if he decides not to, just know that it isn’t your fault and that the two of you just aren’t right for each other right now. There are plenty of other people out there. Good luck. What Do You Think?