It's like. you don't get your own childhood. not "didn't get the childhood you wanted," it's "didn't get a childhood that was yours." and you're supposed to be normal about it. and people tell you Oh you didn't miss much it was bad and awful for xyz reasons you really don't Actually want to be raised as a girl. well, what if I was a girl anyway and everyone acted like I wasn't. called me a name that wasn't mine. told me I was a person I wasn't until I believed it and clung to that fake person until I saw it was cutting into my hands. it wasn't mine. that child wasn't me; wasn't allowed to be me; wasn't even allowed to know there was a me. what if, on a very real level, my childhood was not mine? what if I wanted a childhood where I was actually seen, even if it hurts? and I'm supposed to be normal about it

















