Lanely

he/him 23 heeeyyy girl imade this at tge CLUB whats up!!!! okau gotta go,im busy (rp blog by jeremy)

[sparklingpunch]

@samrubberdusky i found this under my dresser???

[samrubberdusky]

Probably something stupid frum an uhm bender.. I woldnt think too hard on it

[sparklingpunch]

okay man

[sparklingpunch]

@samrubberdusky i found this under my dresser???

[samrubberdusky]

@shovelandlocket @sparklingpunch you knowsthat roadtfip we’replannnung

Wellla i wsk thinkkinh what fkf the whole hang jumped in

Wnd it could bedlieke a aFamily ROADRRIP

[shovelandlocket]

[sparklingpunch]

would that many people even be able to fit in the car?

[sparklingpunch]

I’m not sure how long that ‘not yet’ will be, but i do hope that eventuality will come soon. But what am I to do about it, all I can hope is that my words can actually help.

You can do this, it may take a long time. Yet working through your own heartache is undoubtedly possible for you, I cannot do much for now except hope however. And what I hope is for you to allow your own heart to heal, someday.

Best of Luck to you Lanely.

thank you...

[sparklingpunch]

If only that were possible.

Loveheart, some amount of pain is hurting is required before the healing. It’s painful but if you don’t choose it then it’ll hurt forevermore, no one wants to hurt at all. But if one does not hurt, then one can never truly heal.

It’d be the same as freezing a wound without giving any chance to heal

i know you're right, but i can't... not yet... i will, eventually, but i just can't right now... im not strong enough yet to bear the burden of working through my pain

[sparklingpunch]

Why do you want to forget?

And why are you so scared, there’s definite ways to actually fix things yet you’ve never actually went through and tried.

There’s always a way for things to change without having to forget, yet you’re stuck in essentially a limbo far away from change due to your very own habits.

i don't want to have to hurt before things get better, i just want to feel better... it's too hard to move through it.... and i feel so lost... and alone, in helping myself... i don't know what to do first...

[sparklingpunch]

before what?

i don't want to talk about it

[sparklingpunch]

Are you sure you’ve actually been trying. Have you?

Have you actually been trying hard enough.

Why do you still try to hold onto that which you know is impossible to get back, are you in denial or do you genuinely think it’s possible to get back to the way things were.

i don't know! i don't know what to do, or how to do it, and im scared! i don't know how you know so much about me, but it's freaking me out, and it's making me think about things i don't want to think about! there's a reason i try to forget!

i-it's too much...

[sparklingpunch]

why not?

don’t you want to get better?

Or do you actually not. Do you not want to be better.

i want to be better, but... i don't know if i can... no matter what i try it never feels any better... i just want to go back to how i was, before... before....

[sparklingpunch]

It is what it is.

do you ever think you’ll truly ever be ok.

do you honestly believe it?

uh... i... i-i don't know... i can't... i can't... i can't.... i can't think about it too hard.... i can't......

[sparklingpunch]

do you think you’ll ever be truly ok.

wh... what?

[sparklingpunch]

what's happening..??

[sparklingpunch]

are you happy with the way things are going?

i guess, harper has me staying at his house for a while to make sure i stay sober, which is good for me in the long term, but i feel like shit, physically and emotionally... i guess it's good that people seem to care though.

[cherryglider]

@sparklingpunch If I see you behind a steering wheel for whatever road trip you're going on with your boyfriend, I'm getting in that car and taking over.

[sparklingpunch]

oh my god its not that serious . IM AN ALCOHOLIC BUT IM NOT GONNA DRINK AND DRIVE? also honestly ducky isn't any better of a driver than i am. also he's not my boyfriend

[shovelandlocket]

“Hey Harper can I use your familys car to go on a road trip to god knows where”

Sure who gives a shit anymore,,,…. :/

[sparklingpunch]

can i come

[samrubberdusky]

Ahahah my dreads

[sparklingpunch]

ooc: OHHH MT GOD PARSLEY AHUT UP IM CRYING

[sparklingpunch]

No but I think your very cool and sparkly

ooc: hi endless