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@spocks-kaathyra
weaponized competence
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Not now, kitten, m- da- m- your parental figure is in the middle of a gender crisis
if i was a soccer player i'd simply kick that ball in the goal instead of wasting everyone's time
I've been thinking about head-hopping in narrative prose. First let me say that my first and pretty much only rule of writing is that anything goes, as long as it's a considered technical choice and serves the narrative. So if you want to head-hop in your fiction, go ahead. But imho you'll need serious writing chops if you want to take a reader along with you.
Head-hopping generally happens in third person limited, i.e. a narrative filtered (we use the term focalised) through the perspective of a specific character. So using third person (he, she, it, or they if you're punchy) and keeping the perspective tightly focused on (limited to) what that person knows. It's the most commonly used perspective in contemporary fiction.
Head-hopping is when the narrative shifts from being focalised through one character to another character in quick succession, by which I mean between paragraphs or even sentences. It's the most common technical issue I see in narrative prose. NB I'm not talking about having multiple povs within an extended piece, where individual scenes or chapters have a new pov. I'm talking about rapid shifts, sometimes back-and-forth, within continuous scenes.
Why does this matter? Well, as I say, if you've got the chops, go ahead and polyphonically knock my socks off. But it's not easy. I did write a piece once that did this, to prove to a friend that it could be done - yes, proving someone else wrong is a great reason to write a piece of fiction. It was very tricky, and the pov only shifted a handful of times, after each character had had a few paragraphs to establish their perspective. The story, which was called "The Lost" (thematic link to form) was about two people bringing their understanding of each other closer and closer together (content linked to form). My friend didn't notice until I pointed it out. And then she was furious with me. Yay friendship!
But this isn't what I'm talking about. I'm talking about those sudden shifts, where the reader is left uncertain whose perspective they're following, and is thrown out of the text. It generally happens in scenes where two or more characters are in conversation with each other. I think it occurs for two reasons, both of which ultimately come down to control over point of view.
The author is visualising the scene as if it's a film or piece of TV happening in front of them. This means that they are not themselves anchored in the perspective of one of the characters. They've not decided through whom the scene is focalised.
This means that they're not fully immersed in the experience of the pov character - which means in turn that they're not fully immersed in the reality of the scene.
Basically I'm saying that the scene is not yet fully imagined. What's most likely happening in this stage of writing is that the author is establishing the dramatic parameters of the scene, i.e. what are the beats in the conversation; how is power shifting around; what individual character trajectories are being followed, and so on. Because the scene is in the process of being imagined, the pov shifts around to help with this work.
The solution is to realise that the scene is effectively still in draft. You need to be clear on whom this scene needs to be focalised through; fully immerse in their perspective; and rewrite the scene filtered through that consciousness. (This doesn't usually involve much rewriting. It does mean more thinking, and more craft.)
I nearly wrote "filtered through that lens" there, because it's a good way to get the message across. But I consciously decided against. Because head-hopping often arises when the writer is operating a camera on the scene. And narrative prose is not primarily a visual medium. The recording device you're operating when you write narrative prose is not simply visual. It is a means to record consciousness, which implies all that a character experiences, not just what can be seen (and excludes what a character does not or cannot experience, hence suspense, irony, etc.).
Your task, as a writer, is to come as close to that consciousness as possible. This is why, as I wrote the other day, so much of the actual work of writing takes place in the thinking. Once you're solid on that ground, then you need to understand that the medium by which you represent this experience in narrative prose is language. Not paint or film or colour or light, but the sounds and rhythms and structures and syntax and intertextualities and all the rest of it that language offers. (I'm leaving aside experimental narration here; as I say, in the end, anything goes. Flick through Ulysses to see what happens when the visual elements of prose - the materiality of the book - are exploited for narrative effect. But then Joyce did love the cinema.)
Third person limited, particularly when it becomes close to free indirect discourse, is one of the most effective tools we have to do this. So my advice is to be aware of hopping between heads. Observe the head-hopping, ask yourself what this means for your immersion in your story-world, and, if necessary, push that further into the character's pov. The more you are immersed, the more the reader will be immersed.
And the more you are immersed, the more your technical choices are guided by that immersion. It's a true delight when the words seem to be coming from the made-up person in your head, rather than from your own clumsy brain. Sometimes you find yourself using words you weren't entirely sure were within your vocabulary. That's fun!
And when you're on top of this, go and write a head-hopping story where nobody notices what you've done, congratulate yourself on your technical accomplishment, and tell everyone you can about it.
This camera-operator problem is such a struggle when writing fanfiction for TV shows specifically. I don't head-hop, but I'm used to seeing and hearing the story from outside the characters, so when thinking up a new story I'm primarily focused on the voices (and not necessarily in the writing sense but the actual actors' voices) and facial expressions. I manage better when a character is alone but when there are two or more in a room I'm fully stuck in tight-closeup-on-faces land. Any tips for how to get out from behind the camera?
Yes, great question! Try this:
Act out a short scene from your character's perspective. Choose one that involves another character. (You can do this in your head or get up and block it out if it helps.) In other words, don't have the camera up front, have the camera on your character's shoulder. Then, try to ease yourself away from using the imaginative metaphor of the camera. Experience the scene not only in terms of what your character sees, but what they feel, sense, think, know, and so on. Think of it as a consciousness recording device, if that helps. You're trying to embody the experience of this character in this moment. How does it feel to move like them, react like them, be in the world like them? In this moment?
Write this up in first-person. This should pull you more closely into the consciousness of the character, making you expand the field of language by which you represent them on the page (and what's available from on screen). Your focus could be on what they are thinking and experiencing about the other character: their doubts, their certainties, their conscious and unconscious desires from this interaction. When you've got a good chunk, take a look through this and try to work out what's idiomatic about their language: look at sentence structure, sentence fragments, tone, style, etc.
Technical stretch: try translating that into third person limited or FID. You might find yourself retooling or recrafting linguistic choice that you made in first person to capture the character's voice and/or consciousness.
One other point: being stuck behind the camera (great way of phrasing it) can lead to all kinds of other headaches arising from trying to have a scene unfold in real time. How do I move a character from here to here? How do I capture their movements faithfully? What do I do when a character has needed to spend some time internally reflecting and the other one has been standing around like a puppet?
(I see that one all the time. Character B asks question. Character A reflects on that question and the options available to them as answers. Character B prompts Character A to respond. Reader ("U") thinks: Aha, the real-time issue... Because we think much more quickly than we write or read. So in fact, all those thoughts will have happened in a split-second, rather than the time it's taken you to write them or me to read them. So don't sweat it, unless the time taken to respond is making Character B feel something, and Character A is registering this.)
Shifting away from thinking you're a camera operator to a prose writer helps solve a lot of problems with time management within scenes. You don't, in fact, have to faithfully represent visually everything that happened. You can just crack on with the narration. Say a character's getting out of a car. Yes, you can faithfully describe this and the time it takes. Or you can say. "He got out of the car." Job done, on with the story. Time's bendy in prose, because time is bendy in our heads. You'll be surprised at what you can cut, and how much more effective it makes your prose.
Think about all those reactions you write to give dialogue the verisimilitude of a conversation unfolding in real-time: She nodded... She ran a hand through her hair... She frowned... She took a deep breath... Try cutting them, unless they're something the POV character is registering. Because then it has meaning. Explore that meaning instead. Are they suppressing showing something? Are they observing a reaction in someone else? Why do they notice particular things? Why do they miss other things?
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Here's a piece I wrote recently where I set myself the challenge to write in a very tight third person limited point of view, to see how far I could push misdirection before the piece became unintelligible. I think it illustrates most of what I've been saying. (It even head-hops at the end! Thematically justified? You decide.)
more ppl need to get hooked on this drug called album in order. not enough people on album in order these days
Album in order is a beautiful girl and she wants to give you a special kind of kiss through the ears
just wandered into a whole nother country more or less on a whim this is bomb as hell I love europe
"do it scared" ok. does anyone know if it ever stops being scary or
So, you know how certain Christian missionaries are trained to act in a very obnoxious way, so that most people they preach to will reject them outright, so they feel like the world hates them for being Christian and they can only be friends with fellow Christians? You know that thing?
I think as activists, we sometimes need to stop and ask ourselves whether we're acting like those missionaries. I think this type of behavior is a little more ingrained into our society than some of us realize, and some of us have internalized it without realizing what it's actually meant to do.
do NOT go to the vatican while ur having some kind of life crisis I'm fr abt to go catholic
they designed the tour perfectly bc u see the museum and go "oh my god nothing could ever top this" and then you see the sistine chapel and u go "okay but surely nothing could top THIS" and then you walk into st peter's basilica and u go "I'm Converting To Catholicism"
been getting really into soccer and catholicism recently. who am I... I'm being possessed by the latin american geist...
do NOT go to the vatican while ur having some kind of life crisis I'm fr abt to go catholic
if you're pre-med and you do it with a scalpel it's NOT self harm it's like practice or some shit. the woke doesn't want you to know about this secret loophole
together we are deep space nine
NEW moral philosophy: the amount of Good created by an action is directly proportional to the amount of suffering it causes to Me. if I do something that helps others but doesn't harm me then it wasn't Good enough. if a bad thing happens to others it's because I didn't suffer enough to prevent it. therefore tomorrow I will be voluntarily entering the torture nexus which should hopefully cure the world of all its ills
the most moral thing you can be is selfless therefore the morality of an action is not determined by its underlying intent or its material results but instead by how much suffering it inflicts upon the actor
NEW moral philosophy: the amount of Good created by an action is directly proportional to the amount of suffering it causes to Me. if I do something that helps others but doesn't harm me then it wasn't Good enough. if a bad thing happens to others it's because I didn't suffer enough to prevent it. therefore tomorrow I will be voluntarily entering the torture nexus which should hopefully cure the world of all its ills
ds9 the wire screencap redraw exercise
[image description: Bashir and Garak from deep space 9 in Garak's room. Garak is lying on his side on a bed and Bashir is sleeping in an arm chair. Garak is fully dressed and does not have a blanket. /end id.]