[nokiabae]

i really love oversized clothing that distorts your silhouette. I love being formless

[best-life-wisdom]

if we date and break up you gotta unlearn all the cool shit i taught you. you gotta go back to being lame

[wellbutrinboy]

how many times have i licked the salt lamp in my room since i got it? well that is just my own sweet and sexy secret

[fruitsoftheape100]

[breadbench]

me whispering to my cat and pointing at a bug in my room: eat it

[matchagirl]

sorry but if your bed isn’t against at least one wall you’re not valid

[m86-deactivated20171116]

take these with you. it will be important in your quest

[saddest-cat-hours]

[bloggoth]

poor old granny scorpion-shoes. no one ever saw her death coming

[bloggoth]

it was pneumonia.

[bloggoth]

yes, her pet scorpion pneumonia, who lived in her shoe. tragic.

[bloggoth]

he shot her point blank

[techtvhottie]

me plugging my laptop in: eat these electrons you hungry bitch

[slab-o-meat]

bro its beddy-bye. its nighty-night, dude

[santas-clauze]

[yourownpetard]

He doesn’t like you.

[wokeapedia]

Who?

[yourownpetard]

[bullletproof-love]

do you ever want to check up on someone but it’s just not ur place anymore

[kuntsuragi]

anyone else fucking LOVE BEING IN BED???

[juniorjewel]

bitch im in bed right now!! how did you know!!

[showerthoughtsofficial]

You can probably tell which family member is coming upstairs by their step pattern but wouldn’t be able to pick out your own

[thismachineplaysme]

If my own footsteps were coming down the hall towards me I reckon I would have bigger problems on my hands…

[onlytwitterpics]