So, this has been a while since i last posted on here. It’s been a pretty hectic 2 years since my last updates. And i guess i just need somewhere to word vomit into because i don’t want to run someone’s ear down, of the people who i’ve already done that to.
This year started off with a bang, but not a good sort of bang,a really heart-aching bang. It was hard and the struggles were definitely real.
I find it so hard to fathom how different life was then from what it is now, where i was this heart broken, feeling worthless sort of person to this girl who’s growing in confidence and being able to stand a little better knowing my worth.
Self worth is a really hard topic for me, knowing how low i was feeling to actually feeling unworthy of a lot of things: love, appreciation, time, effort and the list could go on.
It wasn’t until i started growing at the end of Feb that i realised that i am made perfectly in God’s image. And i got so upset realising that people made me ever doubt God’s creation, me.
God is good. Regardless of things that we’ve all been through, all the struggles, all the heart ache and feeling at rock bottom, God will always be good and everything will always happen for the better. You’ll realise that in hindsight, God has provided everything you need to be the strongest person you can be and be able to handle the situation you’re in.
God has been an endless supply of happiness and contentment for me. I’ve realised his goodness and finally understood that the losses in my life will only be my gains later. A loss in a relationship has meant that i will only gain the best God has to offer in the next one. A bad relationship doesn’t make them a bad person, just actually not made for me and in saying that, God will have my perfect match for me in His timing.
I’ve learnt exactly what i need to learn in this season and now moving on to the next. I’ve learnt to look for exactly what i want in a person and finally understanding what i deserve. Understanding the type of love i deserve to receive. The funny thing about “The One” is that everyone who i know, that know they’re with the one, all describe it in the same way. It’s easy. Fights will always be there, disagreements will always be there, PMS will always be there but there will always be love fueling it and you will have fights, but fighting for each other will always be the common ground.
I can’t wait for God to unravel His plans.
