mari || She/Her || Bi || loser || After a lot of thinking I have finally decided what I was going to do with this blog Welcome to my Multi-Fandom Blog! I continuously have made new accounts and blogs dedicated to a variety of fandoms, but then lose interest in them so all the followers that expected content are then disappointed, so instead I decided to post about the things I like, when I like them. Here is my fandom list. ask box: open
Hi Mari ! I was wondering, have you updated part 4 of "overthinking" yet, have i missed it? If not, or there'll be no next part, no pressure! I'm simply curious because I love your writing. Hope you're having a great day ! :)
That’s actually super sweet, I’m not really used to compliments like this. There will be a part 4, had to take a little hiatus because of work, but I will sincerely attempt to get it out in the next few days.
Thank you so much! Would you like me to tag you in it?
This fic was made for a writing challenge that I submitted on my other account.
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Word Count: 1.3K
A/N: In this fic Peter is college by this point. This is actually my first piece of MCU writing and I’m really excited, I hope it’s decent <3
Peter’s eyes fluttered open, squinting at the rays of sun wavering through the curtains letting the slightest of sighs fall from his lips. He stilled a moment, letting his eyes adjust to his surroundings, recognizing the studio apartment he found himself in most nights. His head fell gently to his side to face the body lying next to him and instantly your essence took over his senses. For a moment all that existed was smooth skin, messy hair, and the smell of clean linen from the sheets.
Gently reaching out a hand, he pushed away stray locks falling into your face, shifting onto his side to face you fully with a soft smile. While the nights were always full of excitement and passion, this had to be his favorite moment of it all. The innocence and gentleness that came with the morning. The few moments where he could pretend that he woke up to this every day. Where he didn’t have to worry about anything other than you.
But, as all great things do, they come to end, the most brilliant things leaving before we could fully immerse ourselves in them. You slowly stirred, groaning softly before stretching your arms above your head. Bringing your hands down to rest on your abdomen, a smile fell on your lips as you turned your head to meet the eyes that reminded you of hot chocolate and home.
“Hey pretty girl.” His hoarse and slightly strained voice spoke barely above a whisper as if anything louder would crack the happy moment.
“Hey.” You spoke through a yawn, fingers rubbing away the tiredness from your eyes.
Things between them have been like this for a while now. Best friends since high school with an unexplainable tension that almost anyone could spot, few daring to actually mention. Although their relationship almost escalated on plenty of occasions it only truly intensified about a month before this morning. Typical Saturday night movie turned into more quickly. An unexpected and unplanned occasion, yet from then on it seemed to morph into part of the tradition.
Peter would be outright lying if he said he didn’t love it. The heated moments, the closeness, the late night conversations they had after, he loved all of it… Except for one thing.
He was undoubtedly head over heels in love with you.
Your hand brushing overs his snapped him out of his trance as you interlocked your fingers with his. In these few moments, he could at least pretend things were different.
“What do you want me to make you for breakfast?” Your soft words slipped into the comfortably silent air making his smile stretch a bit farther.
“Pancakes?” His eyes brightened at the thought of your cooking. You let out a giggle and reached up to run a hand through his slightly disheveled hair, giving him a grin and a quick nod before hopping out of bed to stroll to the kitchen as his eyes wandered over your frame.
You yanked up the sleeves of his hoodie that quite loosely hugged your body to get to work as a few moments later he approached, seating himself on a nearby counter. The pleasant quiet took place once again, a big contrast to the usual boisterous conversations that would usually fill the room.
Losing himself in his thoughts, Peter let his mind drift to you and your relationship. Not exclusive, not romantic. Just sexual nights and the tranquil mornings. Every time he would attempt to describe it, he would just come back to the phrase ‘friends with benefits’. Despite the fact it perfectly represented the situation, the thought brought him a sense of discomfort knowing that, no matter how much he would like it tom, it most likely would never become more than friends. More than simply an escape from loneliness. But nonetheless, he wouldn’t dream of giving it up. If this is the type of affection he could get, he really doesn’t want to do anything to jeopardize this.
Soon enough a plate of fluffy heaven was nudged into his hands as you took a seat next to him on the counter. The silence took an awkward turn as you tried to think of something to say. You know what you wanted to say. You wanted to ask if this was still okay but couldn’t find the courage. You wanted to ask if he wanted something more, but had this nagging doubt and fear of rejection that stopped you. You were stuck.
“So… How did you sleep?”
“Pretty good. You?”
“Me too.” He pauses for a second, taking a breath before turning to look at you. “Did I… do something? I-I’m sorry but it’s usually never like this and- I- It’s just…” Even though most of it was left behind in his teen years, some of the anxiety and insecurity that he had thought he’d grown out of seeped through. Peter cursed himself internally for the way it came out.
“No! No no.” A sigh left your lips, searching for an excuse. “You didn’t do anything. Seriously.”
“Well I know you Y/N and I know when something is off. There’s something on your mind. I’ve had a feeling something was bothering you for a while now, but now I’m sure.” You didn’t have a response to that one. You couldn’t tell him. No matter how badly you wanted to tell him you couldn’t. It could ruin your friendship. What if he started to distance himself? What if he didn’t want to talk anymore? You couldn’t risk losing him over this. “Earth to Y/N? You there?” Your head snapped up realizing you hadn't said anything and shrugged.
“Nothing is wrong Peter.” You smiled as convincingly as possible. Peter didn’t believe it, but he knew he shouldn’t press it much further, realizing you wouldn’t tell him anyway. He pushed down any of the nerves rising.
“If you’re sure… Just know you can tell me anything.” ‘You mean the world to me.’ He wanted to add but held his tongue.
“Yeah. Yeah, I know Petey.” A genuine, soft smile pulled at your lips then, but your eyes held a sadness in them as you averted your gaze to your lap. He opened his mouth to speak again, stopping short when he heard his phone begin to go off somewhere in the living room and he moved quickly to retrieve it.
He nearly groaned when he heard Tony’s voice on the other side asking him to visit the tower. While Peter adored working with Mr. Stark, he was hoping for a few more minutes with you. Nevertheless, he said that he’d be there soon and quickly got his things together.
“I’m so sorry Y/N, Mr. Stark really needs my help right now. Do you want to- I mean we could-,” He cringed at the rambling and sighed trying to get actual words out as he slung his bag on his shoulders.
“I’ll call you later Pete.” You patted his cheek with a slight grin, trying to ease his worries. Your fleeting touch made him want to stay more than anything, but he pushed the thought down as he nodded and took a few steps towards the door.
You had turned around, letting the smile drop and wrapping your arms around yourself as you heard the door open. After a moment of not hearing it close, you picked up your head ready to turn around and close it yourself, thinking Peter forgot to do so. You didn’t happen to get the chance to as another set of arms wrapped around you from behind. Peter rested his chin on your shoulder, almost holding his breath, surprised at himself for being this bold. He felt your body relax in his after a minute and suddenly didn’t regret his decision. Even if you wouldn’t tell him, he would be here for you.
Summary: Peter Parker has been trying to tell you, his best friend, that he loves you for a while now, but is terrified of rejection. When he finally musters up the courage, things seem to get in his way.
A/N: I finally finished it, polished it up, and now it’s here for you guys. Hope you guys enjoy it because the next part is the ending.
Part 1 | Part 2
Peter had come to a decision. Monday would be the day. It’s not like you were getting out of a relationship, it was one sour date. He didn’t even have to tell you that he loved you or anything, he could just do something simple. He could ask you out. It couldn’t be that hard, and if you said no, it’s just a date anyway.
He didn’t get a chance to speak to you in the morning, so he rehearsed his lines for when he would see you at lunch. He was ready. This was it.
Walking down the hallway towards the cafeteria, his focus was broken by a laugh. Ahead of him on the left was the guy Peter wanted to tear apart. Just goofing around with his friends without a care in the world.
Peter tried to convince himself out of it. He truly did. But as he got closer and closer to them, something snapped and he just couldn’t help himself. He knew he was in over his head, but at that moment, it didn’t matter in the slightest.
“You must really be in love with yourself, huh. Because I don’t know any other person who so easily goes out of their way to hurt others and not feel an ounce of remorse.” Peter gave him the most disgusted and mean look he could muster, which wasn’t all that scary.
“Excuse me?” The guy asked, and although Peter typically isn’t a violent person by any means, he wanted nothing more than to punch him in the face.
“Y/N. You asked her out and then never showed up. Who does that to someone? Especially someone so great?”
“Oh yeah. That chick.” Damien just shrugged. Peter really had to hold himself back. He doesn’t even remember your name?
“You know what, part of me is glad you stood her up because honestly, you seem like an awful person.” He laughed bitterly at his own statement. “It would be a shame if she actually started caring about someone like you. Y/N is so perfect and you’ll never even get to experience that.” Peter felt what he liked to call ‘“word vomit” rising in his throat. He knew that it would come out whether he liked it or not, and it most likely would put him in an awkward situation. “You’ll never get to look in her eyes, or hear her laugh, or listen to her talk, and you’ll never get to feel her contagious smile pull on your lips. I feel bad for you.”
Oh, how Peter regretted his words with all his heart. It’s not that he didn’t mean them. He meant every single word. Not only did he just make a complete embarrassment of himself because of how creepy he must’ve sounded, but Peter didn’t know Damien, and everything he has seen so far hasn’t exactly been kind. What if he tells you what he said? Panic mode.
Before Damien could respond, he turned around and walked away, deciding then and there not to go to lunch once again. He wanted to smack himself. Why in the world did he say that? Peter headed straight into the bathroom to calm himself down. He really didn’t want to get all anxious in front of people, but this was way more than he was prepared for today.
Peter spent the rest of his lunch period in the bathroom, trying to come up with a solution to his situation. In his next few classes, he barely paid attention. Eventually, he was able to reason with himself. What’s the worst that could happen? If anything, he’ll get rejected. It can’t be that bad. You could feel the same way.
That thought hit him like a semi-truck. This entire time he had been preparing himself for the rejection he would have to face, he never considered the chance that she might feel the same way. Sparks of hope ignited in his chest as his nerves finally began to calm. A small smile rose on his face, his leg bouncing excitedly under his desk. A moment ago time was going too quick and he was running out of time, but now it couldn’t go fast enough. As soon as the bell rung he jumped out of his seat, rushing out the door, feeling a couple of strange glances land on him as he essentially flew past them.
He genuinely thought he was ready until he saw you at the end of the hall. Peter stopped his quick steps a bit too fast, accidentally bumping into some students walking behind him. After spewing a couple apologies towards them, he began walking to you again, albeit this time it was a much slower pace. His heart was pounding against his chest and his tongue felt awkwardly placed in his mouth, but a twinge of confidence kept him going.
“H-h-h-“ he cleared his throat, “Hey. What’s up?”
“Hey, Peter.” You spoke with an almost sly grin. You knew, didn’t you? “So I had a brief conversation with Damien today.” Peter tried to act as surprised as he could, but he knew you could see right through him.
“Really? That guy? Pfft, I thought you wanted nothing to do with him, so why would you even?” He shut himself up before he could dig himself a deeper hole.
“Apparently you spoke to him today too.” You let out a small laugh. Shit. You knew, you totally knew. Although anxiety was nagging at him, he held onto hope. You broke out into a huge smile. “You’re the best, I can’t believe you did this for me.” Peter was a bit taken aback. What did he do?
“I’m sorry Y/N, but I’m not really sure what you mean.” You rolled your eyes and shook your head with a smile.
“You don’t have to be the humble hero all the time Peter. Damien told me what happened.”
“Oh- I- did he really?”
“Yeah, he said you came up to him during lunch and told him off for ditching me.” Maybe this wasn’t as bad as he thought it was. “But guess what? Apparently what happened on Friday was a complete accident.” Oh no. “He said that he forgot and was too embarrassed to apologize. He actually wants to go on another date!” Why does this keep happening? He gets his hopes up just to get turned down. Every. Single. Time.
“Y/N… I don’t know if this is a good idea.” Peter’s heart throbbed when your smile dropped. “He didn’t seem that concerned when I talked to him… I think you should be careful about handing your heart out again, I mean he just stood you up and then made up an excuse. I don’t think you should go out with him again.”
“Why are you doing this?” What? He was just being… honest? “I was hoping you would be at least a little happy for me.”
“I’m not trying to be- I just- I don’t think it is smart to go through with this.” Peter cringed. He knows that sounded harsher than he intended.
“Peter… You’re not exactly being supportive here.”
“Well, how do you expect me to be supportive of this?”
“I kind of expect you to be there for me through everything as my best friend.” The frustration got through to him. This isn’t how this whole afternoon was supposed to go.
“I can’t just blindly support your stupid decisions!” He regretted everything that happened. He regretted talking to Damien. He regretted getting his hopes up. He regretted planning to tell her about his feelings. He regretted having this conversation. He regretted the attitude he used. Most of all, he regretted what he just said to you. You turned and walked away. Peter knew you wouldn’t be talking to him for a while. Whenever he upset you, which wasn’t often, the two of you would spend a few days apart. Part of him needed the separation to deal with rejection, but another part of him wanted nothing more than to be close to you again.
=======================================
Clicking through channels on the TV got boring quick when you do it alone. Peter had no idea how to spend his Fridays without you, and this in itself weirded him out. What would he do if you ever stopped being friend with him? Just sit at home and do nothing all the time? He let out a groan and threw his head back against the couch. Staring at the ceiling didn’t prove to be much more fun, so he turned his attention back to the screen just as there was a knock at the door.
Peter made his way to the door after nearly jumping out of his skin. He wasn’t exactly shocked to see you on the other side of it. Feelings of both nervousness and happiness bubbled in his stomach. He missed you, but didn’t know how to address what happened on Monday… And yet, neither did you. So you both didn’t.
Summary: Peter Parker has been trying to tell you, his best friend, that he loves you for a while now, but is terrified of rejection. When he finally musters up the courage, things seem to get in his way.
A/N: This got a lot more attention than I thought it would, but you guys did ask for a part two and I have provided. Remember, I’m always trying to improve and I’m always accepting criticism.
Part 1 | Part 3
God Peter could never hate himself more than he did this night, curled around a pillow in bed. The silent tears had ceased a while ago, but the streaks they left coupled with the puffy eyes completed the heartbroken look he was sporting. He couldn’t even remember a Friday spent without you, let alone like this.
He regrets his decision. He should’ve told her. He should’ve told her then and there how he felt. That he would take her on a date. That he loved her. Peter shut his eyes tightly and sighed, trying to just stop thinking before his thoughts spiraled his mood further into the ground. Yet, he just couldn’t help it.
Why should he be surprised? Peter Parker was never the brave one. Spider-Man, maybe, but never Peter Parker. Peter Parker is always the kid who misses his chance. Peter Parker is the kid that doesn’t get the girl. Peter Parker is the kid who gets forgotten. So why should he be surprised?
Before he could delve deeper into the black hole his mind was creating for him, there was a knock at his bedroom door.
“What is it?” He called out shakily, worried that his voice would crack and he would expose himself before the person even opened the door.
“It’s just me Peter.” It was Aunt May. She got home earlier than usual. “Can I come in?” Peter couldn’t find the courage to respond, knowing that if he did he would give himself away. It didn’t really matter his answer though because as he predicted, May just let herself in, letting out a small gasp at his state. She quickly came to him to sit on the edge of his bed. “What’s wrong?”
Peter’s first thought was to deny everything and say he was fine. Blame the tears on a sad puppy video or something, but the way his Aunt looked at him just made him break down all over again.
“I messed up May. I really messed up.” He nearly choked on his words as new sobs wracked his body, a wave of heartache coursing through him. May immediately went into ‘parent mode’. She softly cooed a chorus of ‘it okay” and shushes as she gently ran her fingers through his hair, an action known in the past to calm him down.
“Peter I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. Just calm down and tell me what happened.” Although his explanation was often interrupted by hiccups, sniffles, and small sobs, he told her the whole story. By the end of it, he calmed down enough to breathe normally and a shade of red crept up his neck when he realized how childish he must’ve seemed.
“I lost my chance, what am I gonna do?” May smiled softly at him.
“No, you didn’t Peter. Think about it, you’ve known her for years and every time you two are together there is this happy bright energy in the air, I’ve seen it myself. She probably doesn’t even know this boy that well. I think you should tell her. If she feels the same I don’t think one date with one random guy will make her forget about you. Who knows,” a soft smirk rose on her face, “maybe she was trying to make you jealous.” Peter let out a strained laugh at that. Wouldn’t that be ironic? As he mulled over the idea he found it to make a lot of sense and felt even more ridiculous. Nothing changed, he would be taking the same risk.
“Thank you.” He sat up to hug her tightly, relief washing through him. She shook her head and hugged him back.
“It’s my job.” She pulled him back at arm's length. “ Now how about you and me watch a movie or two since you’re missing a partner. You need a break from all that thinking.”
Later that same night he was lying in bed, actually on the brink of sleep instead of wide awake and stuck in his thoughts when he heard a soft tapping noise. His eyes shot open as he glanced around the room. At first, he thought he imagined it in his tired state, but there it was again.
He reluctantly got up and took another look around, noticing someone outside his window, nearly jumping out of his skin. Peter calmed down the next moment though when he recognized the figure on his fire escape. The one girl he was trying so desperately not to think about, yet he didn’t hesitate in letting you in.
“Y/N?” He asked groggily, wiping the tiredness out of his eyes. “What are you doing here so late?” You gave him a strange look.
“It’s 9:45.”
“Oh.” He hadn’t realized just how early he had crawled into bed. Peter opened his mouth, ready to make a joke to hide his embarrassment when he finally took in your appearance. A pretty, but casual navy blue dress and some flats, but the most notable part of the look was your tear-filled eyes. “Oh gosh, what happened Y/N?” He got this sinking feeling in his stomach and he pulled you to sit down on his bed. He thought it was sadness or guilt, but as he pushed away strands of hair sticking to your wet cheeks, he realized it was anger.
You almost never cried at anything except sad romance movies, so whatever, or more accurately, whoever, put you in this state was going to have to face Peter Parker very soon. But all those resentful thoughts were quickly tucked away when you started to stutter out your response.
“S-so I showed up ten minutes early because I would rather be there before him, I was sort of expecting to wait for a-a w-while. After thirty minutes, I thought y’know.” You sniffled through your words and used hand gestures to explain. “Maybe he’s just running late, right? So I kept waiting. H-he said h-he would be there by 6, so by 7:30 I just feel like an idiot, but nevertheless, I held out some hope. M-maybe something came up, th-that’s possible, but I got pretty hungry and since I didn’t know when he w-was going to sh-show up, I just ordered my food. I waited until nine o’clock Peter. Nine! A-and then I didn’t know what to do so I came here.” Peter found it particularly hard to follow along with your story through the fast-paced rambling and the sniffles, but he got the gist.
“He just... stood you up?” He felt a pang in his heart, but this time it wasn’t for himself, it was for you. How could someone ditch someone as pretty and as kind as you?
“Yeah. He did.” Your voice got significantly softer compared to your hurt rant. Peter did the thing he did best. He held you.
“I’m so sorry Y/N.”
“It’s not your fault, I just wish I hadn’t skipped out on our Friday.” You let out a bitter laugh. “Much rather be here with you than at a restaurant by myself.” Peter watched as your eyes cast down into your lap. “Is there something wrong with me?” His face turned into one of shock. Did you actually just ask him that?
“What?” His words came out so soft that if they hadn’t been sitting so close, you probably wouldn’t have heard it.
“I mean,” new tears welled up in your eyes to replace the old ones, “almost three years of high school and people are barely interested in being my friend, let alone date me. And the one guy who asks me out ditched me before I can actually give him a reason to. There has to be something wrong with me.” The vulnerability in your voice made him want to cry as well. “What is it, Peter? Is it how I look?” He quickly shook his head. He would never in a million years guess that you felt this way about yourself, especially when he thinks so highly of you. He didn’t know what to say, but he has to say something.
“There is absolutely nothing wrong with you Y/N. You’re the most beautiful girl I know. And the smartest. And the nicest. Any guy that has you is the luckiest guy I know. If someone like Damien can’t see that, then quite honestly, he doesn’t deserve someone as great as you. I know that this must sound cheesy and right out of a movie cliche, but that is actually what I think.” The small smile you gave paired with a slight scoff had his heart melting.
“Do you... Do you mean that?”
“Yeah.” At that you let your head fall to his chest and he lowered you both to lay down on his bed as he gently pets your hair.
He had an opportunity to tell you but held his tongue. Now wasn’t the time, he needed to be there for you right now and if you didn’t feel the same, you might not want his shoulder to cry on.
A/N: Again, this is an imagine from my other account, I am not stealing it.
Summary: Peter Parker has been trying to tell you, his best friend, that he loves you for a while now, but is terrified of rejection. When he finally musters up the courage, things seem to get in his way.
A/N: I transferred this imagine series thing from my other account @parkerthehero and while I won’t be deleting that account, I will no longer be posting on it. Since this was a series, I do intend on finishing the fourth part, although I don’t know when.
Edit: By popular demand, this is being turned into a mini-series, so let me know if you want to be tagged.
Part 2 | Part 3
Today’s the day. Today’s the day he’ll actually do it. Today’s the day he’ll get over his nerves and just tell you the how he feels. How hard could it be, really? What’s the worst you can say? No?
I don’t think we can be friends anymore.
No. Peter pushed the thought down before his mind had the chance to stress over it. Surely, after being friends for years you wouldn’t turn him away so harshly. You would never, he knew that. Right?
Peter sighed and smiled wistfully at the thought of the girl of his dreams. Glancing over at the clock, he watched it for a moment as 2:34 AM turned to 2:35. He shouldn’t be up this late, he knew that. He needed the little amount of sleep he could get, yet here he was, lying awake and thinking about you as he did most nights. You. He shifted uncomfortably in his bed before turning on his other side. Gorgeous, intelligent, witty you. Peter nearly resented himself for how his heart pounded against his chest at the idea of you. He hated feeling this way more than anything. To have such strong emotions for a person that would most likely reject him anyway.
He again tried to soothe his nerves, bringing reason and logic to the equation. You were his best friend, for Christ's sake, why is he so goddamn nervous? He has told you everything in the past. He told you first about his not so real crush on Liz Allen. He told you first about the spider bite. He told you first about becoming a superhero. He told you first about meeting Tony Stark. Everything. So why couldn’t he just tell you?
Deep down he knew your friendship wouldn’t end because of some emotions, but somehow, that scared him even more. The thought of you distancing yourself to give him space. What if you just kept drifting? Or the thought of you treating him like a lost puppy? He doesn’t want to see the pity in your eyes when you say no. What if you said yes, but it’s because you don’t want to hurt him? He wouldn’t put it past you, sometimes you make the wrong choice to avoid hurting people.
Hundreds of possibilities plagued him, but after a while, he made himself stop. Stop thinking about it. It was just going to get worse if he continued. He would tell her today at school, end of story. Whatever happens, happens. He has put up with this secret long enough.
Peter had actually been able to force himself to sleep after that and although he was a bit sluggish in the morning, he had a bounce in his step that even May recognized on his way out the door.
“What's up with you?” She asked with a slight laugh, seeing the boy hurried by, making him stop short.
“I’m-,” he paused and let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. There was no use lying to her. Plus, he would rather share this with her now instead of being asked questions later if he came home in tears. “I’m going to tell her.” Being the only other person that knew of Peter’s extra big crush, May understood exactly what he meant and a soft smile crossed her face, but just nodded knowingly.
The entire way to school was spent convincing himself that he was making the right choice, that you wouldn’t do any of the things his mind was telling him to worry about. That the gain was worth the risk. Surprisingly, for once, he was winning and a small smile pulled at his lips as he walked towards the school doors, brimming with confidence that was at least half real.
Until he saw you, that is. Then everything he talked himself into, everything he prepared himself for, every little bit of courage he had, all forgotten in an instant. A smile the brightens the room, with eyes to match. Hair that looks as soft as silk. The excitement on your face when you saw him across the hall... Wait.
You saw him.
Panic mode. Peter was by no means ready to approach now. He’s not even sure if he could have a normal conversation with you right now, quite frankly, because the words he has been dying to say to you would be sitting on the tip of his tongue. So Peter did the only thing he could think of. Shot you a smile, then turned and walked the other way.
As soon as he was out of view from you, he scolded himself. Idiot. He chewed on his bottom lip harshly and wonders what you were thinking. Were you mad at him for not coming over? Did you think he was mad at you? Whatever it was, he was almost positive it wasn’t good. Nonetheless, he went to class without any of his books, only slightly relieved he wouldn’t have to face you until lunch.
Peter felt like a coward. He skipped lunch. He just couldn’t face you, he wasn’t ready. He was planning to go, but his heart jumped in his throat and just headed to the library instead, but the entire rest of the school day he tried to build up his confidence once again. Once the last bell of the day rang, he took a deep breath and headed over to your locker, ready to pour out apologies.
“H-hey Y/N! I’m r-really sorry about ditching you at lunch, I just had some major studying to do for another class.” The lie slipped out of his lips without intention and he panicked slightly. Peter is a horrible liar and he knows it.
“It’s okay!”
“I know that it was a jerk- wait, what? It’s... okay?” He could hardly believe what he just heard. You usually chided him whenever he skipped out on stuff without mentioning it.
“Yeah! Someone else kept me company.” His heart almost sighed in relief.
“Oh. Oh, that’s great, I’m glad.” He let a smile spread across his lips, a weight being lifted from his shoulders. “Who is she?”
“It’s a he actually.” You paused to smile somewhat bashfully and Peter could feel his breath stop with your words. He quickly pushed down the worry and reminded himself not to jump to conclusions. “His name is Damien.”
“That’s nice!” He faked a cheerful tone, ignoring the way his heart thudded almost painfully.
“Yeah, and I have some good news!” He nodded for you to continue. “He asked me out on a date!” You nearly squealed that line and continued to ramble on about it, not noticing the way Peter’s face fell into one of slight horror and pain. “Can you believe it? A date! I don’t think anyone has even ever had a crush on me, let alone asked me out! For a while, I was starting to believe I would never get a boyfriend. He’s taking me out to dinner on Friday.”
Peter could feel his heart crack at your words and found a lump forming in his throat. Sure you would talk about guys occasionally, but mostly celebrities or random ones you two would see on the street. Peter was sure nothing has ever hurt him in this way.
“But... Friday is movie night.” He was right. Friday you two would spend the night eating your weight in junk food, watching movies, browsing the web, and talking.
“I know, but I was hoping I could skip it just this once.” You gave him a guilty smile, before taking back the suggestion. “But it’s completely fine, it’s not right of me to cancel our plans like that. I’ll just tell Dam-”
“No no... It’s...” Peter almost struggled to say it. “It’s fine Y/N, really. You seem really excited, its just one Friday, I think I can manage.” He let out a fake laugh as to reassure you.
“Thank you so much, Peter!” You pulled him in for a tight hug and by instinct, he wrapped his arms around you as well. Tears welled up in his eyes and he blinked rapidly to subdue them. He knew that if he just said no you would cancel without complaint... But he couldn’t ruin this for you. Not when you were that happy. No matter how much it hurt.
So I decided to jot down a list of things I’m into so that if you come across my blog and like my writing, you can see what I’m into. This may be edited in the future, but until then you may put in requests or ask questions :)
- Marvel
- South Park
- Osomatsu-San
- Detroit: Become Human
- New Girl
- Hetalia
- Mystic Messenger
- The Seven Deadly Sins
- Black Butler
- The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.
- Kakegurui
- The Walking Dead
- Disney
- Be More Chill
- American Horror Story
- Smosh
- Creepypasta
- Persona 5
- My Babysitter’s A Vampire
- IT
- Yuuri On Ice!
Do you ever just miss someone you’re not supposed to? Someone that literally shouldn’t have any affect on you anymore? Someone that you wouldn’t even want in your life, and yet you still miss them. This feeling is impossible and I want nothing more than to sleep forever.
Every queer person I know over the age of 30 is fucking appalled by the state of the queer community, and I have heard some absolutely stellar anti-gatekeeping tirades from queer grandparents. I had a long conversation with a 43 year old pansexual who told me the infighting is almost certainly because we’ve collectively forgotten our joint history and have become more interested in individual social clout than actually advancing the movement for across the board queer equality.
So this is a reminder, I guess, that our elders are on our side. The gatekeeping and the exclusionary behavior is crap.
I will have a giveaway running at one point all year. There will be four in total for the whole year. When one ends, another begins. This way I can keep giving and you’ll still have an opportunity to win!
There will be one winner that I will send $25 worth of book(s) to. You can pick ANY books you want. (not just the books pictured above…. ANY)
The rules are simple:
must be following me: @booklover277
reblog / like this post to enter. reblog as many times as you want.
I will be buying the book(s) from book depository or amazon, so make sure one of those will ship to your country.
if under 18, you must have parent/guardian permission.
must be willing to give me your address
must have your ask box open, so that I can contact you.
If the winner does not get back to me within 48 hours, I will be selecting a new winner.
My petty ass when someone skinny buys something XXXL from a thrift store to ~transform~ it into a cute tailored cocktail dress: how about you leave the XXXL section alone so poor fat women out there can retain some sense of variety out of the 7 things that actually fit them in the god damn goodwill
ugh the top and bottom ones make me especially furious because she removed the interesting part of the dress! those would both look adorable on me as is.
she could make an ugly black dress like that herself without chopping up a cool vintage dress in a rare larger size
@maryburgers would you have gone to that specific theft store to buy that specific vintage dress? If you would have never gotten it then why would you degrade her for doing cute and interesting to a dress that probably would have just sat at the thrift store forever.
Hey you know what’s actually degrading? Making a habit, and by that I mean an entire blog, where you buy all the plus size clothes in a thrift store and then take pictures of yourself contrasting your tiny body against the IMPLLLAAAUSIBLY OUTRAGEOUSLY HUUUUGE clothing. That is degrading.
Also like, fat people live everywhere SOMEONE would have gone to that specific store and fit into those dresses as is and loved them, there are so little options for fat people everywhere, none of the alterations they made are special or unique, like they could easily find something similar in a thrift store at the same price point.
plus size clothes DON’T sit at the thrift store forever. general size clothes do. our donated clothes last maybe a few weeks tops at a thrift store because there’s a larger demand for them than supply, that’s why the sections are so damn small despite the average us woman being a size 14, because they’re picked over constantly by people who need clothes. i was not expecting to do this but i’m gonna go into deep detail so you understand why exactly this is fucked up.
poor people are more likely to be plus size because of lack of access to healthy food, which is the target demographic of a damn thrift store in the first place. thrift shopping is trendy now, which is fine, except when you buy clothes for projects like this that are in high demand but low supply: maternity clothes, plus size clothes, pajamas, etc. if you need clothing, buy it. but you can make any of these projects from clothes without poaching from low supply areas and taking comical pictures that mock fat bodies.
now here’s why there’s a ridiculously low supply of plus size clothes: fat people don’t have as many places to buy clothes and all of them have poor selection so we don’t buy a lot of them to begin with. the shopping pattern of a plus size person is very different from that of a straight size person as well. i know this from working in plus size retail. overwhelmingly, we shop when we desperately need clothes. and i mean desperately like hole the size of a basketball in the thigh of your jeans desperately. wearing a bra from 1998 desperately. work blazer held together with scotch tape and safety pins desperately. we can’t donate our clothes because we wear them until the point where we physically cannot anymore.
we also don’t cycle through trends as much as smaller sizes because a) shopping is a huge ordeal for a plus size person and b) our clothes cost WAY MORE so we can’t afford to wear an article of clothing once and then give it to goodwill. then on top of that none of the places that give you money for clothes EVER want your fatass clothes. skinny people can pop over to any secondhand clothing store that pays for donations and get some of that investment back. we can’t do that EVEN THOUGH our clothes cost way more than straight sizes. oh, and we get paid less than thinner women btw :) that’s always great.
so if we can’t regain any of our investment, we’re just gonna put up with clothes we don’t like until we can’t wear them anymore or we give them away in the case of weight loss (when ur fat you know a lot of other fatties, and if ur a queer/trans fatty someone is always having a clothing swap you can give to).
all of this adds up to make it so that thrift stores are in low supply of plus size clothes that more and more people need because us fatties? if we don’t look good we don’t get jobs. you cannot look even the slightest bit unkempt or you come off as lazy or bitchy, and if you have a family to support you can’t spend weeks looking for a job where they won’t judge your competence based upon whether your clothes are trendy or not. when you’re not plus size and you take away these clothes from needy women you are in small part enabling their suffering.
it shouldn’t be that way. women should have access to affordable, well fitting, professional clothing regardless of size. but that’s not the world we live in so you can’t just cover your ears and pretend that it is.
Having gone from a size 4 to a size 14 due to weight gain from medication, I can tell you that there is absolutely NO NEED to destroy plus-size clothing in order to get cute cocktail dresses or whatever in a thrift store. There are TONS of adorable petite cocktail dresses, formal dresses, etc, for smaller women. And there is a huge lack of cute dresses for anyone larger than a 10. I’m not even considered ‘plus size’, and I still struggle to find dresses that don’t make me look like the Goodyear blimp, because I’m pretty sure designers give up once you get beyond a certain size and intentionally make the dresses as ugly as possible.
If you want to make your own dress, buy the fucking fabric and do it from a pattern. You can even make it from a ~*~vintage~*~ pattern if you want extra Twee Points. Don’t buy, cut up, and ruin a perfectly good plus-size dress, while taking mocking pictures of how OMGHUGE it is, in order to make a rather bland cocktail dress. There’s literally no need to do that other than that you’re unimaginative, selfish, and don’t care about plus-size women.
This time x1000
Do you know how infuriating it is to try and find maternity clothes at a thrift store, find nothing, have to rely on you mom to spend $200 for 5 fucking items, and then go on pintrest and see some girl who would fit 90% of the clothes at the thrift store cutting up a maternity dress to make a blouse that looks like one you can by at urban Forever 21?
It’s one thing to cut up a dress that’s SLIGHTLY bigger than what you normally wear.
It’s completely another to take specifically plus-sized clothing that is in great condition and cut it down to a smaller size.
Like I’d understand if those clothing were ruined in a way (like this one matenity nightgown Mom had that she gave to me, its sleeves were ripped beyond repair) and nobody would buy it because not everyone can fix badly damaged clothing, but from these pictures the clothes look totally fine and wearable.
It’s just a fucking waste to ruin good clothing that someone could have bought at a much cheaper price than they could have at a regular store.
If someone bought perfectly good clothes at a thrift store and then altered them for cosplay, would that be wrong? Acceptable?
Buying fabric to make your dress isn’t cheap. It’s a whole lot cheaper to buy something where you have room and space to alter it. And sometimes you can’t always find a cute dress that fits you just right at the thrift shop, even if you are smaller. And I seem to remember (might not be the same girl, but probably is) that this started because she was trying to save money and couldn’t find anything in her budget.
It really comes down to the fact that it’s her money and it’s a store. There’s someone who purchases tons of sweaters in order to make new, creative ones. I can get the frustration, but seriously? She bought it. She can do what wants with it.
And the before and after pictures aren’t to mock the size. It’s to show you what it looks like before she altered it.
The thing about cosplay is that you just don’t cut up a bunch of clothes for it. Cosplay outfits are usually made of specific fabrics, and I’m pretty sure you don’t need to cut up a polka-dot dress for cosplay.
The only kind of cosplay I can see you needing many different clothing for is if you’re cosplaying Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas.
STILL you can cut up clothing that is YOUR size for that.
The issue is she is choosing plus-sized clothing, and plus-sized clothing costs more in other stores-granted, it has to because more fabric is needed, but thrift stores are where you can get them cheap.
Buying fabric can be cheap; I live in the middle of fucking nowhere, and there’s a fabric mart where fabric’s 99 cents per yard.
It’s one thing to choose a dress a little above your size, but she’s purposely seeking out plus-sized clothing for this, and more specifically, cute plus-sized clothing that doesn’t make you look like a walking potato sack.
I used to be plus-sized as a young teen, shopping for clothing was shitty because all the clothes made for bigger kids was ugly, or still did not fit right, and thrift shops usually had cheaper cuter clothes for people in my size.
I really don’t usually comment on stuff like this, but I have to say this dedication is kind of ridiculous. In my opinion, anyone is allowed to buy whatever they want and do whatever with what they bought. Unless someone is specifically saying that a dress is ugly because it is big I don’t see a problem. It’s literally fabric, wether it be plus size clothes or regular size clothes. You cannot tell someone what they can or cannot buy. That’s like people who say that you can’t buy tofu unless you’re vegan. You can’t be a gatekeeper for public products that anyone can buy.
Its difficult finding cheap plus-sized clothing, this woman can literally buy anything else to make her stuff from but she specifically chooses clothing made for plus-sized people.
How would you like it if someone took clothing in your size, and I mean constantly, not just once or twice, and made it into something their size?? Yeah a few articles won’t make a difference, but do you realize that plus-sized clothing is not as widely circulated as smaller sizes?? That can and does add up later on, considering plus-sized clothing is NOT cheap, and the cheap ones are found in thrift shops.
THAT is why its such a big deal for her to keep going out and buying up perfectly good plus-sized clothing and cutting them down to her size, because there;s literally thousands of dresses in her size already, and fabric bolts are a thing, yet here she is taking clothing that would cost a lot elsewhere.
My mom is plus-sized and do you know how bad shopping is for her?? She’s that size because of medication and thyroid issues, so its not like she can just drop twenty pounds to find more clothes in her size. She relies mainly on thrift shops for her clothes, since she doesn’t make enough money at her job for both food, rent, gas, medication AND clothing that fits.
As the OP said, this is not about “taking something that’s a few sizes too big and resizing it” this is clothing that is made SPECIFICALLY for plus-sized people, and in most stores these things cost more than regular clothing because more fabric is needed, so a lot of people rely on thrift stores for cheaper clothing!
You’re just gonna have to trust me on this, but I would know. I live with 5 family members and 4 of them are plus sized and struggle with the same problems. I myself am plus sized and understand the struggle of finding clothes. That is not the point though. What that person buys is none of our business. What she does with her purchases is none of our business. I don’t think it’s fair. And while I do understand that it’s difficult to find clothes are both fit and you could afford, it’s not her problem. If there is food in the supermarket that is discounted, even if I can afford the more expensive version, I’m still going to buy the discounted item. I can’t choose the more expensive item because someone might need the discounted one. Yes it is unfair that plus size people do not have the clothes they need all of the time, but you guys should be blaming the people who make clothes because that lady’s allowed to do whatever she wants.
Straight people get to make out in public all the time, no matter how gross it is they are allowed. If gay people do it it’s “disgusting” and we should be “more courteous of our fellow LGBT+ people”
Pride is meant for us to be happy, and kiss in public and feel safe about that. Gay people are killed for making out w/ their s/o in public. Let us be. you can move away from people. Our sexuality has been repressed and denounced down to even hugging each other. We may have one chance every year to make out in public so just let us. Let us not have to hide who we are for like one day.
We can work on having spaces that aren’t sexualized for minors and sex repulsed people, but for now this is how it is.
My petty ass when someone skinny buys something XXXL from a thrift store to ~transform~ it into a cute tailored cocktail dress: how about you leave the XXXL section alone so poor fat women out there can retain some sense of variety out of the 7 things that actually fit them in the god damn goodwill
ugh the top and bottom ones make me especially furious because she removed the interesting part of the dress! those would both look adorable on me as is.
she could make an ugly black dress like that herself without chopping up a cool vintage dress in a rare larger size
@maryburgers would you have gone to that specific theft store to buy that specific vintage dress? If you would have never gotten it then why would you degrade her for doing cute and interesting to a dress that probably would have just sat at the thrift store forever.
Hey you know what’s actually degrading? Making a habit, and by that I mean an entire blog, where you buy all the plus size clothes in a thrift store and then take pictures of yourself contrasting your tiny body against the IMPLLLAAAUSIBLY OUTRAGEOUSLY HUUUUGE clothing. That is degrading.
Also like, fat people live everywhere SOMEONE would have gone to that specific store and fit into those dresses as is and loved them, there are so little options for fat people everywhere, none of the alterations they made are special or unique, like they could easily find something similar in a thrift store at the same price point.
plus size clothes DON’T sit at the thrift store forever. general size clothes do. our donated clothes last maybe a few weeks tops at a thrift store because there’s a larger demand for them than supply, that’s why the sections are so damn small despite the average us woman being a size 14, because they’re picked over constantly by people who need clothes. i was not expecting to do this but i’m gonna go into deep detail so you understand why exactly this is fucked up.
poor people are more likely to be plus size because of lack of access to healthy food, which is the target demographic of a damn thrift store in the first place. thrift shopping is trendy now, which is fine, except when you buy clothes for projects like this that are in high demand but low supply: maternity clothes, plus size clothes, pajamas, etc. if you need clothing, buy it. but you can make any of these projects from clothes without poaching from low supply areas and taking comical pictures that mock fat bodies.
now here’s why there’s a ridiculously low supply of plus size clothes: fat people don’t have as many places to buy clothes and all of them have poor selection so we don’t buy a lot of them to begin with. the shopping pattern of a plus size person is very different from that of a straight size person as well. i know this from working in plus size retail. overwhelmingly, we shop when we desperately need clothes. and i mean desperately like hole the size of a basketball in the thigh of your jeans desperately. wearing a bra from 1998 desperately. work blazer held together with scotch tape and safety pins desperately. we can’t donate our clothes because we wear them until the point where we physically cannot anymore.
we also don’t cycle through trends as much as smaller sizes because a) shopping is a huge ordeal for a plus size person and b) our clothes cost WAY MORE so we can’t afford to wear an article of clothing once and then give it to goodwill. then on top of that none of the places that give you money for clothes EVER want your fatass clothes. skinny people can pop over to any secondhand clothing store that pays for donations and get some of that investment back. we can’t do that EVEN THOUGH our clothes cost way more than straight sizes. oh, and we get paid less than thinner women btw :) that’s always great.
so if we can’t regain any of our investment, we’re just gonna put up with clothes we don’t like until we can’t wear them anymore or we give them away in the case of weight loss (when ur fat you know a lot of other fatties, and if ur a queer/trans fatty someone is always having a clothing swap you can give to).
all of this adds up to make it so that thrift stores are in low supply of plus size clothes that more and more people need because us fatties? if we don’t look good we don’t get jobs. you cannot look even the slightest bit unkempt or you come off as lazy or bitchy, and if you have a family to support you can’t spend weeks looking for a job where they won’t judge your competence based upon whether your clothes are trendy or not. when you’re not plus size and you take away these clothes from needy women you are in small part enabling their suffering.
it shouldn’t be that way. women should have access to affordable, well fitting, professional clothing regardless of size. but that’s not the world we live in so you can’t just cover your ears and pretend that it is.
Having gone from a size 4 to a size 14 due to weight gain from medication, I can tell you that there is absolutely NO NEED to destroy plus-size clothing in order to get cute cocktail dresses or whatever in a thrift store. There are TONS of adorable petite cocktail dresses, formal dresses, etc, for smaller women. And there is a huge lack of cute dresses for anyone larger than a 10. I’m not even considered ‘plus size’, and I still struggle to find dresses that don’t make me look like the Goodyear blimp, because I’m pretty sure designers give up once you get beyond a certain size and intentionally make the dresses as ugly as possible.
If you want to make your own dress, buy the fucking fabric and do it from a pattern. You can even make it from a ~*~vintage~*~ pattern if you want extra Twee Points. Don’t buy, cut up, and ruin a perfectly good plus-size dress, while taking mocking pictures of how OMGHUGE it is, in order to make a rather bland cocktail dress. There’s literally no need to do that other than that you’re unimaginative, selfish, and don’t care about plus-size women.
This time x1000
Do you know how infuriating it is to try and find maternity clothes at a thrift store, find nothing, have to rely on you mom to spend $200 for 5 fucking items, and then go on pintrest and see some girl who would fit 90% of the clothes at the thrift store cutting up a maternity dress to make a blouse that looks like one you can by at urban Forever 21?
It’s one thing to cut up a dress that’s SLIGHTLY bigger than what you normally wear.
It’s completely another to take specifically plus-sized clothing that is in great condition and cut it down to a smaller size.
Like I’d understand if those clothing were ruined in a way (like this one matenity nightgown Mom had that she gave to me, its sleeves were ripped beyond repair) and nobody would buy it because not everyone can fix badly damaged clothing, but from these pictures the clothes look totally fine and wearable.
It’s just a fucking waste to ruin good clothing that someone could have bought at a much cheaper price than they could have at a regular store.
If someone bought perfectly good clothes at a thrift store and then altered them for cosplay, would that be wrong? Acceptable?
Buying fabric to make your dress isn’t cheap. It’s a whole lot cheaper to buy something where you have room and space to alter it. And sometimes you can’t always find a cute dress that fits you just right at the thrift shop, even if you are smaller. And I seem to remember (might not be the same girl, but probably is) that this started because she was trying to save money and couldn’t find anything in her budget.
It really comes down to the fact that it’s her money and it’s a store. There’s someone who purchases tons of sweaters in order to make new, creative ones. I can get the frustration, but seriously? She bought it. She can do what wants with it.
And the before and after pictures aren’t to mock the size. It’s to show you what it looks like before she altered it.
The thing about cosplay is that you just don’t cut up a bunch of clothes for it. Cosplay outfits are usually made of specific fabrics, and I’m pretty sure you don’t need to cut up a polka-dot dress for cosplay.
The only kind of cosplay I can see you needing many different clothing for is if you’re cosplaying Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas.
STILL you can cut up clothing that is YOUR size for that.
The issue is she is choosing plus-sized clothing, and plus-sized clothing costs more in other stores-granted, it has to because more fabric is needed, but thrift stores are where you can get them cheap.
Buying fabric can be cheap; I live in the middle of fucking nowhere, and there’s a fabric mart where fabric’s 99 cents per yard.
It’s one thing to choose a dress a little above your size, but she’s purposely seeking out plus-sized clothing for this, and more specifically, cute plus-sized clothing that doesn’t make you look like a walking potato sack.
I used to be plus-sized as a young teen, shopping for clothing was shitty because all the clothes made for bigger kids was ugly, or still did not fit right, and thrift shops usually had cheaper cuter clothes for people in my size.
I really don’t usually comment on stuff like this, but I have to say this dedication is kind of ridiculous. In my opinion, anyone is allowed to buy whatever they want and do whatever with what they bought. Unless someone is specifically saying that a dress is ugly because it is big I don’t see a problem. It’s literally fabric, wether it be plus size clothes or regular size clothes. You cannot tell someone what they can or cannot buy. That’s like people who say that you can’t buy tofu unless you’re vegan. You can’t be a gatekeeper for public products that anyone can buy.
The Upsides of Being a Loser @stardust-ghost - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
