[starlitemanager]

We're doomed without you. Anyway, bring me a souvenir! :*

I have all of the faith in the world in you, dear Lila. The motel and diner are in very capable hands. I wouldn’t be going away if I thought otherwise. And I will be certain to bring something special back for you! 

[starlitemanager]

A MESSAGE FROM MANAGEMENT—

Dear Staff,

As you may well know, I have decided to use my vacation time to recharge before our hectic holiday season. While I’m gone, I expect everyone to be on their best behavior and delivering service to the usual degree of excellence. 

I will be out of the country from December 5-19, and while I will have my cellular phone on me in the event of an emergency, I may be without service (or I may simply have turned it off, but that’s okay, because I have a plan). 

Should any issues arise, Nadia Benson (@nadiaruns), our Front Desk Manager, will be handling operations, and Ethan Dorsey (@ethan-dorsey), Head Janitor, will field any concerns regarding our facilities. Lila Sinclair (@lilacsinclair), manager of The Shooting Star Grille, will oversee all diner operations, as usual. Should Nadia or Ethan be unreachable, Emery Weston (@emeryweston) is our most senior employee, and I trust that she will step in to help.

In case of emergency, please notify the abovementioned staff members. They will have access to a list of emergency service numbers at the front desk, including contact information for Police, Fire and Ambulance, as well as emergency plumbing contractors. The list also includes the phone number for Nevada Public Health Services and Animal Control.

See you in two weeks!

Your friend,

Jimmy Cohen Starlite Motel, Manager

P.S. Please try not to burn the place down.

[deadbeatmaker]

[starlitemanager]

jimmy, you know i don't ask for much so, consider this is a formal request for a cot to put in the back since i live here at the front desk now. thank you in advance.

Nadia, my dear, you know I can’t have you camping out here. Not only is it a labor violation, but it’s also very unhealthy to not have a fair work-life balance. I’m certain we’ll find a great applicant to help out at the front desk soon. The sign you put up may have dissuaded some people from dropping off a resume… Could we maybe call Craig and see about getting an ad on his list?

[starlitemanager]

When is the Starlite going to host TedX conference? There are a lot of valuable skills under this roof.

You make a very good point there. We have a a rich variety of people at the Starlite and Shooting Star Grille, with an interesting array of skills and expertise. It would certainly be interesting to have some folks host their own little talks, like informational sessions. I’m not sure we have the space or resources for such a thing, but consider this added to my “To Investigate” list…

[starlitemanager]

Jimmy you gotta believe me when I say this -- MADELLE IS A ROBOT !!!

Go home, Keegan.

[starlitemanager]

can i your best woman at your wedding, jimmy? i'll also accept flower girl but lets be real here, no one would be a better best woman than me.

Nadia dear, I love your enthusiasm! But let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves, please. (Even if I do agree that you would be an excellent Best Woman.) I will update you when I have news to share. 

[starlitemanager]

If you could sleep with anyone in the motel who would it be and why?

Whoa, now hold your horses. I’m in a committed relationship. Even if I wasn’t, it’s hardly my place as motel manager to be answering this kind of question. My goodness.

[starlitemanager]

No worries, big J! I actually took the money from your wallet prior so all good.

You know I dislike garnishing employee wages, Keegan, but I’ll do it if the money’s not back in my wallet by the end of the day.

[starlitemanager]

Just wanted to let you know, sir, that your office toilet has be plunged! I even added a vanilla cupcake air freshener plug-in to uh -- make your bathroom time more pleasant. But for the love of everything holy please give the Indian food a break.

…………Thank you for your discretion, Keegan. The plug-in is a nice touch, but I hope I don’t find a reimbursement form on my desk for it later. 

[starlitemanager]

I very much appreciate your compliments and appreciation, as well as the expedient fulfillment of my request. Please know I hold you in highest regard as management and a gentleman. With great pleasure, Miss Evolet Lancaster

Oh my, Miss. Lancaster. Any more flattery and I fear my head won’t fit through the doorway of my office. Thank you for your kindness and your patronage of the Starlite.

[starlitemanager]

Dear Mr. Cohen, I'm writing to request a new kettle in my room or, if at all possible, there may be an old manual coffee press in storage somewhere? I cannot start the day without tea or coffee and the maker in my room brew everything far too strongly. Thank you for you time and with sincerest hope, Miss Evolet Lancaster.

Well, this just might be the nicest-written request I’ve ever received in my time managing the Starlite. Yes, Miss Lancaster, we can arrange this. I don’t believe we have a coffee press kicking around, but we definitely have a few kettles available. Personally, I can’t start the day without a cup of chamomile, so I wouldn’t dare withhold the key to morning tea from anyone. I’ll have a kettle sent up to your room. I hope you’ll find it satisfactory.

[starlitemanager]

It's okay, Jimmy-Jam. I know you're just saying that so you don't hurt the other employees' feelings! Also are we still on for brunch tomorrow?

Please get back to work, Keegan.

[starlitemanager]

Also, Jimbob, we all know I'm your favorite employee. It's freaking adorable how modest you are!

Keegan, for the hundredth time, it’s Jimmy. And while factually correct that you are an employee, you know that I don’t pick favorites or take sides. Even if we are what the kids call “twinning.”

[starlitemanager]

manager, my main man, my main squeeze if you will -- I'm so happy we match (dp bg color). it's almost like we're on the same level. I would even dare say we're like twins --twinzies!

Keegan, my friend, I daresay we are like a modern version of Twins.

[starlitemanager]

event night for the motel idea: nadia and emery mud wrestling.

Alternatively: Nadia and Emery mediation session. Behind closed doors, that is. Maybe with a witness or two, maybe a bouncer. I’d really like to see them work things out.

[ninenine-brooklyn]