fuck you! [stars your wars]

[blanq]

this fanfiction shit is easy

[vaders-georg]

in my head the star wars equivalent of tswift is some human woman named tay’lor spiff or something and her stans are losing their minds over theories that she’s secretly a jedi singing about the horrors of war, even though she’s from a neutral system that hasn’t seen so much as a moral panic in 50 years

[vaders-georg]

the theories get even more egregious during the imperial era, with people straight up thinking she joined the rebellion in secret and is loading her songs with subliminal rebel propaganda. their main piece of evidence for this is if you play a certain song backwards, it sounds like she’s saying “freedom” in shyriiwook. the fans get really defensive if you point out she’s performed at the yearly empire day celebration thrice now and her family historically owned ewok slaves

[vaders-georg]

i regret to inform both you beautiful people that this isn’t going to go how you think it will

[vaders-georg]

spiff fans (also known as “spiffies”) insist that the two decommissioned venator-class destroyers spiff purchased, the bad blood and the reputation, are for diplomatic purposes that benefit the rebellion. jedi’lors have concocted theories that she served on both ships during the clone wars and was respectful of every clone that served there, despite her courtship of a gravball player that thrice advocated against the clone veterans being granted natural citizenship

[unabashed-unbothered-deactivate]

🪐chirodactylmanisagatewaydrug Follow •••

all goofing aside I don't understand the urge to reimagine Tay'lor Allisoarn Spiff as a secret Jedi fighting for the rebellion when the rebel alliance is literally like overflowing with women fighting the empire. Gara and Ke'Cha and Mileu and Halcey are right there. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't like Taylor but why would you hang all your hopes of taking down the empire on her

🤖 thedroidteer-andthegarbagecompactor Follow

Isn't Lady Gara a force sensitive?

🪐chirodactylmanisagatewaydrug Follow

Hence why I put her in the list of famous force using women who are in the rebel alliance?

(okay ignore the fact I've put an image in here but this is ops icon)

🪐chirodactylmanisagatewaydrug Follow

#im sure op has this post muted by now but Ur icon is so real op

The icon is because of this post

👤Eelinrmalice-deactivated201X023

btw to just clarify for anyone who sees this reblog of this post

op is basically saying something along the lines of "yea ik tay'lor spiff is a jedi but like. why is she y'all's only force using rebel icon when there are all these other force users in the rebellion???"

i might have worded this badly but hopefully i got the main point across

🪐chirodactylmanisagatewaydrug Follow

Hi OP here I most CERTAINLY DID NOT SAY TAY'LOR SPIFF IS A JEDI???

(based on this post)

[vaders-georg]

[gravedangerahead]

@sydneysageivashkov

[vaders-georg]

if this reaches 100k im changing my pfp to tired rebel alliance ben affleck.jpg

[stinkythehutt]

considering that canonically we know anakin is a robotics nerd with 1 friend (who he calls Dad by mistake at least once a week) and 0 rizz, i’m very enamoured by the fact that in any NO66 Good End AU, all of the jedi would be so confused that HE was the one with the secret wife. i have a scene in my head where a couple council members, let’s say depa and mace, are chilling gossiping and depa says “omg GUESS who’s secretly married” and mace names every single member of the order living and dead before guessing anakin

[hanasnx]

(via @ozvezdja)

[lanabenikosdoormat-deactivated2]

good afternoon kotor nation

[starwarstimebabey]

Raise ur hand if you think its funny that kreia said isolation can weaken you but also complains about how many people are on the ebon hawk

[starwarstimebabey]

for the low low price of 5000$ when (if) im ever done writing me coruscant is an eldritch being fic i will not write one about tattoine being one and will not come up with somethign for the other city planets

[bryoria]

apathy! is! death!

[citronellals]

good evening

[duelofthefatesmp3]

[audible-smiles]

every star wars alien is so good and then there’s

this

[moosefeels]

yo man you talkin’ smack about max rebo you back off my blue elephant son

[audible-smiles]

HIS WOOKIEPEDIA ARTICLE IS LITERALLY THREE SENTENCES LONG HOW DOES EVERYONE KNOW HIS NAME

[butchflirt]

Who the fuck is talking shit about Max Rebo????

[marcsalmonds]

Renowned jizz musician max rebo???

[radicalposture]

palpatine straight up told anakin he was a sith lord and anakin was like well. this is a lot to process so im going to go fetch my boss and we’ll come back in about half an hour and murder you so don’t go anywhere and palpatine didn’t you have to admire the man

[prophecyguy]

palpatine is the best villain of all time bc he's the classic master manipulator who pits his enemies against each other without lifting a finger by preying on their weaknesses but normally those types of villains have the caveat that once their bullshit get exposed it's a simple matter of slapping handcuffs on them bc they're like weak old CEOs or whatever

but our boy sheev? when his plans don't go perfectly he's just like oh well and starts zapping fuckers to death bc he's also the most powerful old prune in the galaxy and he could just kill everyone around him if he gets bored

like luke throwing away his lightsaber and declaring himself a jedi was great but you know that luke kinda thought that was it, the crotchety old emperor doesn't have vader to fight for him anymore courtesy of luke cutting off vader's hand for possibly the fortieth time in anakin's life, so it's smooth sailing until lando destroys the death star and blasts them all to kingdom come, but then palps is like aw shucks no new apprentice can't blame a guy for trying and just starts deep frying luke for shits and giggles and our poor twink is like THIS ISN'T ONE OF THE THINGS I THOUGHT THE FORCE COULD DO ABORT ABORT ABORT

and with mace and co arriving at sheev's office to bring him in for being dark catholic it's functionally the equivalent of a scooby doo villain of the week getting unmasked by the gang but then he just starts snapping necks

[starwarsheritageposts]

star wars heritage post

[mileskaysolomon]

[papasmoke]

you just hate the cis because of the things that they did

I hate the cis because it is led by the treacherous count dooku

[starwarstimebabey]

so i’ve got one kotor 2 playthrough that before koriban was so lightsided that fucking sparkles were happening so i decided to start a second one where i was like “im going to make not lightside choices! im going to be mean!” and i am absolutely failing at that :) 

[starwarstimebabey]

the way kotor 2 talks about the force is literally the worst thing that could happen to me, someone existentially horrified by deserts

[starwarstimebabey]

HK-47? Hes gay now

[starwarstimebabey]