*long groan* @stateschampagne - Tumblr Blog

emvisual

#aesthetictagtba

@ghostmargarita

“Right. So. Invisible murderer. Ghost? Spirit? The Invisible Man? What do you think?”

#v; He is omnipotent. ( gv )#ghostmargarita #statesmargarita

manyimaginativemuses

What Did I Just Smoke? || @stateschampagne

stateschampagne

manyimaginativemuses.

@stateschampagne

The Dude walked into the bowling alley high off his ass. He had just gotten a new batch of weed from his dealer that was unlike what he usually got, so he wanted to see if he could bowl better high on this new stuff. Walter was there, as usual, complaining about his bitch of an ex wife and The Dude couldn’t care less for once. He was just there to bowl and relax like always.

But then he saw a familiar face walk into the bowling alley.

More specifically his familiar face.

The man with his face sat himself down at the bar, a large brimmed cowboy hat on his head much like the Stranger had when he first met him. Maybe this face stealer knew him. The Dude wasn’t sure if what he was seeing was real or if it was an aftereffect of the new weed.

“C’mon man… I told Frankie to gimme the clean shit, none of that new stuff laced with PCP or whatever.”

“The fuck are you talking about, Dude?” Walter asked as he overheard his friend.

“Nothing man, I’m just seeing weird shit and I think my dealer fucked me over.” The Dude mumbled before making his way over to the bar and sitting next to the man. He quickly ordered a white russian before turning and looking the man over.

Sure enough, he was a dead ringer for him.

“Hey man, how the fuck did you get my face?” The Dude asked bluntly.

Someone had told Champ he’d be interested in what he would find at this said bowling alley he was stepping into. Of course, it has to be from an ANONYMOUS tip, but he was always curious in following anonymous tips. He’s not quite sure what he’s looking for, only that they had said that he’d know it when he sees it. So Champ decides to take a seat at the bar and keep a look out.

Whatever it is, it should be here already, he thinks to himself as he waits. Perhaps whatever-- whoever it was had already left. Or they weren’t coming. Either or, Champ orders a glass of bourbon for his time.

When he feels someone sit next to him, the hairs on the back of his neck stand STRAIGHT up. Something was wrong. Was this who he was waiting for? No, they just ordered a White Russian. ( A disgusting drink, if you ask him. ) Who still drank those, anymore? Champ rolls his eyes and takes a sip of the Bourbon ( which isn’t very good ) before he hears the man next to him turn toward him. His left hand hovers over his jacket, ready to open it and shoot the man right in the forehead if it comes to that.

But then-- he catches his face. Right before he catches his voice. And what the fuck the man looks exactly like him. “What in goddamn fuckin’ tarnation? How did-- what? The hell you mean how’d I get your face. Boy, I been on this earth longer’n you!”

#manyimaginativemuses #im cRYING #long post for ts

kingsmanmakings.

“You want a Kingsman suit, Champ? I could ask Harry. I’m sure something could be arranged for you.”

“...I might. Might not be such a bad idea t’have one, and all. I jus’ don’t wanna go all the way over there t’get one. ‘m gettin’ too old for travelin’ n shit.”

#kingsmanmakings

integrumequitem:

It was difficult not to smile at the older man’s overt ENTHUSIASM. “Yes. I did. You’re quite the shot.” Not that he’d expected anything else from the head of Statesman. Gideon gave the man a slight nod, drawing up his OWN weapon and emptying the clip in the target quickly and efficiently. “Not as nice as piece as yours but it does the job.”

“I’d lie and say there ain’t no better marksman than me, but I never could take credit for someone else’s accomplishments. You seen Whiskey shoot? It’s goddamn ART.” Champ watches as the Kingsman agent emptied his magazine, leaning on his right foot. “So long as it gets the job done. I do like my luxury, though.”

#OH OOPS xD ma bad :p #integrumequitem

notimeforemotion.

❝ARE YOU offering to provide said ‘threads’?❞ He can’t say he’s not excited about the chance to wear an authentic cowboy hat. Maybe find some chaps.

“O’course! I ain’t gonna send ya to some damn Boot Barn. Take ya t’my favourite place, myself.”

#champ: sends merlin a truck full of cowboy hats #notimeforemotion

statesabsinthe.

“I’ve been home for less than twenty-four hours, and you’re already trying to rope me into a family dinner?”

“I only do what she tells me, Nat. So you comin’ or nah?”

#statesabsinthe

stateswhiskey

a Note for all the personal blogs following me:

hi hello welcome! idk what brought u here but welcome

i only ask that you don’t reblog headcanons, threads, or asks. you can like or reply to your heart’s content but pls don’t reblog.

ok thats it enjoy ur stay! <3

#also here too #listen up fuckers ( psa )

Job 37:23 - “The Almighty is beyond our reach and exalted in power; in his justice and great righteousness, he does not oppress.”

GOD. The creator and ruler of the universe, the source of all moral authority. The supreme being. He is all knowing. He is all powerful. He is almighty. He… is a dick. He picks favourites. He has stood by and watched wars happen. He has let the human race destroy themselves, century after century. He has let them destroy the earth. He is petty. He gave the United States their president. He lets the bad guys win.

Why?

There is only one law that God MUST follow, and even He doesn’t know why. And it is that He must not get in the way of human affairs. So… He doesn’t. He disappeared for two thousand years. He left his angels in charge. He simply watched, and He simply waited.

Until He started getting high reports of supernatural occurrences happening on earth, in a small concentrated area. Now, He has disguised himself as one of them. He goes by Leon, or Champagne. He follows those who hunt. Because this is what He has seen, and this is what has to happen.

#toiltroubleic #v; He is omnipotent. ( gv )

aliasgareth

Shot to the head? In our day… we called that a Headache

#old man squad #yES

@obfcnteri: champ, probably: pinching the bride of his nose I love all my kids I love all my kids I love all my kids

#do you remember? when it was like september? ( hc )#WHERE IS THE LIE #Y'ALL IS GONNA GIVE HIM A HEART ATTACK OR HE GON DIE OF STRESS I TELL YA

somebody: america

statesman: 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there

#musingstagtba #champ as shit

grace’s statesman name is poinsettia, her favourite champagne cocktail.

#do you remember? when it was like september? ( hc )

@notimeforemotion hit that heart