stellar-cannibalism

is the most fun cannibals in the universe, after galactic cannibals, of course.... Sarah, est. 1994. she/her. bisexual, but married to a Man (affectionately known as The Spousal Unit). alt of cannibalisticgalaxy. This is my non-Star Wars blog. Warning: contains: Ineffable Husbands/Good Omens, Percy Jackson, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, Wheel of Time (books not the trash Amazon show), Sarah J. Maas books, The Empyrean series, and other misc. fandoms, in addition to my fabric and fiber arts stuff

[milton-dammers]

Star Trek: Enterprise S03E13 (2004) Shran

[stellar-cannibalism]

COMBS

[browsethestacks]

Still Can...

[elf-kid2]

Beautiful. The composition. Colors. The lamp. The fact that the photographer managed to make the moon look GOOD (not all cameras and photographers can achieve that).

Absolutely spectacular. Ultraluminary. Yes.

[fuckiamdying]

[what-even-is-thiss]

I’m kinda surprised that nalbinding isn’t as popular as crochet and knitting tbh because it has an even lower barrier of entry tools wise and unlike crochet and knitting it makes fabric that you can cut.

I guess it’s because it’s slower or something.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Nalbinding aka needle binding is when you use yarn and a big sewing needle to make fabric btw

It also has a lot of different kinds of stitches you can do that make different densities of fabric.

Some people even make rugs.

[thewolfwaitsbelow]

I feel like part of it might be casual people are generally aware of the existence of crochet and knitting, even if they don’t know very much about either, but have never heard of nalbinding

[what-even-is-thiss]

Yeah I hadn’t heard of it until recently and I ordered a big bone needle for myself to try it out and that should be arriving soon.

I was surprised that I’d never heard of it though. It’s older than knitting and crocheting and even though it’s been done all over the world it’s super relevant to Nordic culture and my grandmother and I are both into keeping in touch with our roots a bit so I’m surprised I’ve never heard of it.

It seems like the sort of thing that would be popular even if not as popular as crocheting and knitting, considering the low barrier of entry.

[what-even-is-thiss]

You also don’t need a bunch of different sized needles for nalbinding or whatever. The size of the stitch is controlled either completely freehand or by pulling it against one of your fingers. Most people who have a lot of nalbinding needles seem to either have tried out wood, bone, and metal ones to see which kind they liked or they enjoy carving wood or bone and like making their own needles as an extra hobby.

It’s also a lot easier to freehand and adjust as you go than crochet or knitting and you mostly go by inches instead of rows and number of stitches so a large number of accessories like stitch markers or whatever isn’t really necessary.

Maybe the lack of accessories also makes it unpopular idk. People do like collecting things in their nests.

[the-color-of-sound-is-space]

I've been wanting to do so, I cannot find anyone who can teach me, and any books I can find on it are Ass in the Visual Learning department. Otherwise I'd be making the hell outta some nalbinded fabric

[what-even-is-thiss]

I found this channel by a nice man who makes up close tutorials

Happy Needlebinding

I create videos on YouTube to learn people how to needlebind using two fingers and your thumb. Needlebinding helps people to relax, relieve

[what-even-is-thiss]

I thought this would be kind of a niche post to make but I was quickly reminded that I’m on tumblr, the website full of gay people with one billion hobbies.

[moonlightingcurse]

Why should we leave you? Because we don't like you.

STAR TREK – 2x08: I, Mudd

[victusinveritas]

[stellar-cannibalism]

I realized that not only is what was supposed to be my due date coming up on the 20th, but after that is mother's day.

When my cousin had her oldest, we all went to celebrate her first mother's Day as a mom with her and her six month old.

I get to visit my daughters grave, I guess.

It's just so astoundingly not fair. There is nothing I wouldn't have done for Mira to live. And there's nothing I wouldn't have done to give her the best possible life. And I see stupid kids of my parents friends actively choosing to give their kids shittier lives because they fell for conservative tradwife bullshit and believe a high school graduate should be the breadwinner despite being married to a fully qualified civil engineer who has a master's degree and is a veteran. Because the high school graduate is the one with the penis.

I'm just so angry. Why do they get to have a healthy baby and make stupid decisions and choose not to take good care of it?

[stellar-cannibalism]

I want to jump out a damn window.

I feel like I can't deal with it anymore. The misplaced guilt. The constantly doubting if I did everything I should have.

Looking at myself and wondering what I'd look like at 35 weeks pregnant like I'm supposed to be right now.

Trying not to wake up my partner as I cry myself to sleep. Again.

I just want my daughter. But she's dead. She died before anyone realized anything was wrong. And I wish I'd died with her on days I like today because I can't stand the pain.

[stellar-cannibalism]

I know it's because my baby shower was supposed to be this coming Saturday. But that doesn't also mean i kinda want to jump out of a window again.

The only way out is through. I know that. That's why I'm in therapy.

But I also really, really can't do anything but want my little girl. Mira didn't deserve to die. And the part of me that wishes I'd died on the operating table when the cut me open to remove her from me is a lot bigger this week. Because I'm supposed to be a month from getting to meet her. Not almost four months from having buried her.

[stellar-cannibalism]

Genuinely don't know what the point is of existing anymore. Like.

Mira is gone. I'm desperately trying to work through the grief. But my baby died and I couldn't do anything about it and a large part of me wishes I could have died on that operating table when they cut me open and took her out of me. Because everything is empty and hollow. I spent a year without medication trying to get pregnant. And then another year on constant doctors visits to fertility clinics. And then the third IUI worked and she was there.

But before I knew it, just as I was getting excited and stopped waiting for the other shoe to drop. She was gone.

And whenever I think about it, it's a toss up if I want to die or if I'll be feeling like i can get through this.

How do people find joy and move on?

[stellar-cannibalism]

My baby shower was supposed to be this coming Saturday.

But Mira died in January and I'm trying so hard to heal and move forward because the only way out is through. But sometimes it feels like I've made no progress at all. And other times I worry I'm not treating it as something as important as it should be treated. Because she was everything. And I'm terrified I'll lose my ability to care about anything ever again. Because it's less painful to be apathetic to the whole situation sometimes. But other times it's just overwhelming and paralyzing.

I miss her so much it physically hurts.

[dreamsy990]

i saw someone say nobody needs to know what a .txt file is anymore. what the fuck is the world coming to

[dreamsy990]

unironically i think we need to bring back computer labs because APPARENTLY some people WERENT taught basic computer literacy and internet safety in school

[dreamsy990]

things about computers/the internet i think kids should be formally taught in schools because theyre important to know and the amount of soon to be grown adults i know who know NOTHING about any of these is quite frankly almost all of them (and resources to learn if you dont know these things, because its never to late to get better with computers)

how to troubleshoot by yourself when you have a technical problem

what common file types are

some very basics on how to use ""developer tools"" on your computer (because i cant think of a better way to refer to them) like task manager and command prompt (and their mac equivalents, terminal and activity monitor ofc)

how to read and understand a privacy policy and what your personal data is, as well as what it being collected actually means and steps you can take to keep it private

how to understand terms of service (hey. if you have trouble with reading legalese and worry about being able to understand these policies anyways, here's a site that gives basic summaries of privacy policies and ToS)

what a cookie actually is

internet privacy and your digital footprint!! seriously i dont know why we stopped teaching people that they shouldnt be putting their entire real identity online in a world where your online actions can ruin you irl

basic safety measures like antivirus software (and why you should use it or if the built in one on windows or mac is enough for you) and backing up your computer (also a mac guide)

common keyboard shortcuts (and on mac)

as an additional note: things i think everyone should know on computers and the internet but schools may bit hesitant to teach about for whatever moral/legal standards schools pretend to operate on

vpns and adblockers! (btw for most of these where you can pay for things im purposefully not recommending any specific software but seriously just use ublock origin for an adblocker)

how to not get a virus while pirating something

what a temporary email is and when to use one

red flags that you shouldn't trust a website (and how to quickly check the security of a site)

what javascript on a website does and how to disable it to get around paywalls

[dreamsy990]

ok one last addition! if you want to take it one level higher, i think learning the very basics of at least one programming language is good for people. it makes computers less scary and it makes you feel very cool, and a lot of people get discouraged about it because it seems overly complicated and hard to learn outside a formal classroom setting, so heres some resources for learning the very basics of python (because i consider it the easiest language to learn and knowing one language will make it easier to learn others)

an online compiler so you dont need to download anything or worry about running code directly on your computer if that makes you nervous

a basic video guide to introduce you to python and walk you through beginner steps

a guide to some syntax and commands you should know (this was literally my lifeline in my first CS class)

some performance tasks to give you things to code to practice and assess yourself

[stellar-cannibalism]

I have to work so hard not to scream at people "yeah sure XYZ sucks but my baby died. My daughter. Who it took two years and an absolutely absurd number of fertility clinic appointments to bring about. And the worst part is nobody knows why! Just bad luck they tell me. These things happen. Freak accident." Like that's supposed to help when I feel like I've lost everything. How do people move on? She was perfect and beautiful and I can't even do anything but be upset and wait for my body to heal and be healthy enough for another try. As if she wasn't everything to me.

[werewolfetone]

Speaking of books it's been a while since I've seen one of these posts going around & I'm curious so everyone could you tell me what you are reading rn in the tags please

[stellar-cannibalism]

Someone please tell me when all this grief therapy and support group shit is supposed to make me feel less like a black hole where I radiate nothing but misery despite anything that crosses the event horizon?

It'd been two months and one day since they told me they couldn't find the heartbeat and my world ended. My daughter was everything. And she died.

When your baby dies, every part of the future you've been imagining with them does too. I didn't even get to give birth to her. They had to do an emergency cesarian. And now they've told me unless I wait 18 months+ to get pregnant again, I'll *have* to deliver that way going forward. Full stop.

I want to feel something that isn't just grief. I guess that's why I'm getting a quarter sleeve tattoo on Thursday.

[soongism]

brent spiner photographed by steve mccurry in los angeles, california, 1991.

[farmgf]

what the FUCK is going on right now. what is going on

[farmgf]

this post is so funny because it has over 10k notes and no context but all you have to do is look at the time stamp to know exactly what the context is