Diabetes Challenge: Day 8
1. At least it’s better than cancer!
In most cases, this is well meaning, but we hate hearing it anyway. Cancer is a terminal illness that will kill you within a couple years if not months, usually. It works quickly, but, if you catch it fast enough, and you’re lucky, you can be cured. Diabetes, on the other hand, is a chronic illness that is so called because, if you take care of yourself, it will not kill you within years. However, if something else doesn’t take you out first, it will kill you, slowly, and painfully. (Unless it’s from a bad low, in which case it’ll be fast.) In fact, diabetes is not so much a “chronic illness”, so much as it is a “chronic terminal illness”. Everyday holds the risk that something could go wrong, and we could die. This is just as serious as cancer. It is merely different in it’s type of difficulty. Incidentally, there are cancer survivors, but no one survives diabetes. We live with it until it kills us or something else does first.
2. You don’t look like you’re diabetic!
What does that even mean? What does a diabetic look like? Overweight? Well, some T1Ds are, and others aren’t. We come in all shapes and sizes. It’s an autoimmune disease, and weight has nothing to do with it. I suppose they could be thinking of the T2Ds, who are more numerous, and whose condition can be linked to weight, but even they don’t have to be overweight to become insulin resistant. Sometimes life just hands you a lucky lottery ticket. Seriously, what does a diabetic look like? What on earth do you do with that statement?! I’ve never known how to respond to it. It’s just so bizarre. I don’t get what they mean by it. Is it a compliment? An insult? What is it??
3. I could never do that! Inject myself everyday…I hate needles!
Again, I think this one is typically well meant. I guess people are trying to say we’re brave, or strong. Here’s the thing though, if we don’t prick our fingers a minimum of four times a day, and give ourselves a minimum of 4-5 injections a day, WE WILL DIE!!! I mean, would you rather prick yourself, or give up and die? Put like that, it’s pretty good incentive. It’s an abominable choice, but it’s not a hard one: Die, or take needles. I mean, do people saying this think we do it for fun? Because we want to? Because we’re brave? We never had a choice! We do it because we have to. It’s never something we aspired to. It’s another question I have trouble finding a suitable reply to: Ummm..thanks, but if I don’t, I’d die, and probably painfully…
4. It’s sugar free! or you can’t eat that, right?
These ones are also well-meaning, and of all of the above statements, are perhaps the most understandable offered. However, they are also based in ignorance. You see, everything you eat, (except protein), becomes sugar through digestion. This is why diabetics count the carbs in what they eat, so they know how much insulin to inject. Thus, the only danger with eating sugary things for us, compared to other food items, is the rate of absorption of said sugar into the blood stream. Raw white sugar, liquid sugar, (like juice, syrup, or non-diet pop), sugar tablets, frosting, and similar things that are concentrated in sugar and contain little to nothing else, can hit our blood within minutes, and cause a lot of problems, so we avoid them unless we’re low. However, that doesn’t mean we can’t eat chips, or cookies, or cake, or pie, or chocolate. It just means that we have to know the carb count, ration what “sweet” things we eat, and preferably eat it with a meal to further slow the rate of absorption. With baked goods, and other such junk food, since the raw sugar is mixed in with flour, and butter, etc. it doesn’t hit our system so fast as to be a danger, as long as we’re smart about it. Hence, we can eat sweet things. We just need to choose how we do it. You can offer a diabetic just about anything, besides juice, without causing offence, or rather annoyance we try not to show. Don’t worry about it. It is up to us to decide, based upon our own situation and treatment strategy, what we can and cannot eat. Feel free to offer us cookies and cake! Diabetes is not “avoid sugar”, it is calculate how much of everything you eat, and plan, plan, plan.
5. This is Diabetes in a Cup/on a Plate, or This is so sweet it’ll give me Diabetes!
Listen, for T1Ds, diabetes is autoimmune; drinking sweet things did not give us T1D. We cannot prevent it. It just happens. Also, many T2Ds are equally helpless to prevent their diabetes, but even the ones who could have possibly prevented it, don’t deserve to hear you saying things like “this is diabetes in a cup.” It’s hardly going to make them feel better now it is? T1D or T2D, it’s a cruel and ignorant joke. We don’t like to hear it.
What bothers me more though is that no one would say something was “cancer in a cup,” if sugar were widely associated with cancer. In fact, cancer jokes aren’t common in society at all. For that matter, people don’t joke about MS, or Alzheimer’s, or allergies, or just about any other serious illness or condition. Why joke about diabetes, then? Do they realise that it is anywhere between the 5-7th most common cause of death in North America? Do they understand how deadly and debilitating it can be? They must not, because if they did, they wouldn’t be joking about it. Children die in the ER with diabetes. People get arms and legs amputated with diabetes. People get nerve damage, kidney failure, and blindness with diabetes. Trust me, if drinking that “diabetes in a cup” does increase your risk of having diabetes, you shouldn’t drink it, and you definitely shouldn’t joke about it. Don’t take the risk, because it just isn’t worth it. Who knows? You might have to wind up living with it same as I do, but unlike you jokers apparently did, I didn’t get a choice, and my life isn’t a massive joke. It’s a daily fight for survival.
Look, I know I sound harsh, and I get people say these things without thinking, (which is why I hope this will enlighten you who’ve said things like this), and, yes, I do joke sometimes with my friends and family about things to do with my diabetes, but context is so important. You see, when I joke, it is honestly dark humour. “Diabetes in a cup,” on the other hand, is jovial and trivial, and I real do feel that that is a detrimental view to spread, because having a chronic illness like that is precisely the opposite of what a such a happy-go-lucky joke would imply. I’m hardly going to hate your guts if you’ve made, or are making, such jokes. Most people, honestly do mean nothing by it, they simply don’t understand, but I would hope after being made aware of how hurtful such comments actually are, you would please stop.