As a transgender woman, it’s really been an eye opening experience to see just how much better people treat me since I’ve started to pass, some things I’ve noticed are as such:
-people take it more seriously when I say I’m scared or anxious, if I tell people who I’m not out to that I feel upset about not being able to have children, they don’t try to laugh it off anymore, they offer condolences instead.
-people seem to be a lot more willing to talk to me out of the blue, I used to go to clubs and have no random strangers talk to me and now I get spoken to a lot, not necessarily in a romantic context. This can be both a good or bad thing but I think it’s positive overall, especially when it happens in professional contexts I guess.
-people are just kinder to me, shopkeepers ask how my day is more, I get less scary looks, I haven’t been called a faggot or a tranny walking down the street in ages.
-the only one on this list that is bad is that Mormon and Catholic missionaries approach me much more often.
-I experience less sexual harassment every single day that I go outside.
This is weird to write out because a lot of it is in the minutia, like how people look at you and the tone they use, like ur a deadly beast escaped from the zoo, and I haven’t been dealing with that for a while, obviously I still get treated poorly as a woman, but the difference is pretty immense in my day to day life. Here’s what hasn’t changed that some people seem to think will have changed
-I suddenly experience sexual violence (I experience much less generally)
-doctors suddenly don’t take me seriously (it took me 8 years to get diagnosed with debilitating OCD that I was constantly bringing up, still an issue to the same degree)
-I suddenly experience sexism (the whole time I was out but not passing I was being treated like I was dumber, less creative, and less capable than the men in my life, while these feelings were being invalidated by other people in my life because I “wasn’t really experiencing sexism”)
It’s just absurd how some people think transgender women, or at least visibly transgender women, have some kind of privilege or leg up over cis women, or over other TME people, like I know some extremely lib middle aged people think transgender women even have privilege over cisgender men
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