Puppygirl Ramblings @stellythepup - Tumblr Blog

can we have a communist revolution yet? I don't like global warming :c

more @importantcatpics

oh were still doing trans infighting? dont you know we have bigger things to worry about than trans men being misogynists? theres bigger fish to fry than policing the misogyny of trans men, you know. The Enemy hates us all equally after all. we should really be ignoring how misogynist trans men are to trans women so we can join together against The Enemy. you know, The Enemy? misogynist trans men arent The Enemy, silly, you should be kissing them instead so we can Join Forces. your oppression by misogynist trans men doesnt matter, because we need to combat The Enemy. shut up about trans men and their misogyny. shut up. why wont you let them be bigoted to you. misogyny against trans women isnt like Real Misogyny. just be a good tranny and shut up and take it. theres more important things than you

I might be the personification of uncertainty

franz-bauch-foto

In the forest

#want

pangur-and-grim

I told my little nephew that I'd wave at his airplane when it flew over my house today, and he very calmly and politely explained that it wouldn't be possible to see me due to the limitations of human vision. I said he just had to squint real hard, and he took a deep breath and went into the toddler version of "see, what you're not understanding–"

hourlycatphotos

thepromiscuousfinger

dreadwedge

As a transsexual woman 👩 who has had multiple experiences ‼️ I have found 🔎 that the biggest block of cheese 🧀 is usually the one ☝️ that has the largest size 📈

dreadwedge

mature content

midnightssea

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

important-cat-pics

ashenmind

mimic girl…

jingerpi

I never really wanted to get into this on here but I want to talk about it now so nobody can stop me.

honestly one of the worst things is that I knew. a lot of people talk about not knowing they were trans until xyz event where they realized and went through whatever hardships and then transitioned. people talk about repression and discovery and all these things. and those are all powerful and important experiences I don't see myself as above them in any way. but I knew.

I was never an egg, I was never in denial. when I was 3 years old I dreamed I was a princess. I know this because my family retells it as a funny story. I tried to wear my sister's clothes regularly, I asked people why there wasn't a word for the reverse of a tomboy, I put on makeup, I used she/her pronouns online since I first learned to read and write.

I don't bring this up to do this "I've always been a woman deep down, so you should listen to me as super valid Mr psychologist gatekeeper". my point is that it didn't matter.

I knew, and it didn't matter. it wasn't an issue of having to figure out who I was and then realizing that. it's that who I am was intentionally killed and locked away at every turn. it's not that I didn't realize I was a girl, it's that I wasn't allowed to be one. I was hurt and punished and sent to conversion therapy repeatedly. I can't "go back in time and tell my younger self to save her years of struggle". it wouldn't matter. it wouldn't change anything at all. the issue wasn't a lack of information. it's a lack of power. kids and trans kids especially are subject to so much abuse and we have no power to do anything about it. it is such a great tragedy beyond words. knowing what you want to do and wear and say and be, that you want this name and these pronouns and that cute dress, and being powerless to do anything about it anyway. forced to wear clothes picked out for you by a guardian, only able to use pre-approved nicknames online. only allowed to engage in these specific hobbies and have these specific friends. all of whom treat you like garbage. but it doesn't matter. it doesn't even matter if you know it's unjust, there's no way to do anything about it. it is perhaps the most powerless position anyone can be in. there is no level of knowledge or personal strength that will get you out of it. you just have to shut off until enough time passes for the law to deem you as worthy of being a person.

I think that's a big part of why I'm like this now, once you see that powerlessness, when you experience the depths of hopelessness and disenfranchisement, you can never unsee it. it does something to you

jingerpi

it's easier to think that I did something wrong. that if I were smarter or stronger or cleverer I could've figured it out. and that when I did get out of that place, that it was due to my strength. but the reality is it wasn't. none of it was my fault, and that's almost harder to handle. there's no amount of trial or belief or hope or self knowledge that can magically warp the world to be kind to you. when I got away it's because I was a legal adult. that's it, that's all that changed. the only thing holding me back that entire time