Tarot Reader

jus reading my cards after my mental breakdowns to make myself feel better. Very spiritual, I worship the herb.

[stonedtarotreader]

I’m just a bad person

[stonedtarotreader]

I wanted us to do so much,

To go to the corn maze

To paint pumpkins

To carve pumpkins,

To take fall pics,

We were gonna have a weekend away,

A weekend with friends,

A double date,

Matching flannels,

My birthday,

A “family thanksgiving”

Our first Christmas;

Gift giving

Seeing Christmas lights.

This was all stuff I imagined eith you,

I never opened up to anyone. I guess it was for that reason. You didn’t really hurt me. You did. But. Idk. We mutually agreed to this breakup. But I didn’t want it. I want you back. I don’t wanna think about our lasts.

Our last time seeing each other, our last kiss, our last time laying in bed together, our last time sleeping together, our last time making love, our last time just hanging out, and watching Netflix, or even being annoyed at your gaming. I miss that. I miss the little things. I miss you.

But I guess we grew apart. And we have different priorities. But I still love you. And I always will.

[stonedtarotreader]

I’m sorry.

For not being enough,

For being too much,

For being too clingy,

Or not clingy enough,

I’m sorry for my self image issues,

I’m sorry I get sick a lot,

I’m sorry I have mental illness,

I’m sorry I forget to eat and pass out,

I’m sorry for not caring about my grades,

For not caring if I fail,

For wanting to move away.

For not giving a shit about my future.

For not even wanting to live.

[stonedtarotreader]

I haven’t been sober in two weeks plz help

[stonedtarotreader]

I’m just sad. Nothing feels real. Idk what to do.

[stonedtarotreader]

I don’t wanna die alone.

[stonedtarotreader]

I haven’t been sober in multiple days. Another note. My bf said he bought my something. Any guesses as to what it could be

[stonedtarotreader]

So I picked out a really cute outfit for my boyfriends graduation. Showed my family and got fat shamed. I’m only 160 at 5’7. A little chubby but that was intense. So now I’ve changed into an old dress I usually wear and less makeup. Just sad having to do that.

[stonedtarotreader]

Drive 2 hours away for a dentist appt. joint there. A joint back

[stonedtarotreader]

My adventure of the day involved falling down a hill on edibles but hey I painted this

[stonedtarotreader]

Got lost in the forest today.

[stonedtarotreader]

Drove an hour and a half to see my best friend, get lost in the forest, not find where we parked at said forest. And a random dude yells “nice truck” at a stop sign.

[stonedtarotreader]

I know I shouldn’t be upset that my bf wanted a night to play games w his boys but idk. Classes are starting soon

[stonedtarotreader]

My boyfriend wanted to play games w his boys so I stayed home and got drunk

[stonedtarotreader]

Finished my summer class today woot woot

[unsuspectedsunrise]

And I use drugs to make me feel anything else but emptiness, but when the drugs stopped taking my pain away - I knew I was fucked.

A. Lemmer

[stonedtarotreader]

Knowing I’m cared for is important. I almost downed a bottle of anxiety meds but SOMEONE slapped them out of my face. Well. Probably better that way. I do want to watch the sunrise soon