[toastbutteregg]

[stoopid-head]

Crazy that some people I work with are there to provide for their kids and family. Like bitch?? I’m here so that I don’t sit at home and slip into a crisis and also so I can buy weed.

[knifexwife]

Happy Pride y'all

[owlet]

every day i look at the sink and i’m like seriously? honest to god i have used dishes once again?

[owlet]

this post is not for people frustrated by ppl putting dishes in their communal sink bc “oh i would NEVER leave a dish in the sink.” fuck off you already have your life together you don’t need this post. this is for the slimes and losers whose sinks are filled with the dishes of their own creation. this is for the lazy women, the useless men, the pathetic enbies. get out of here you sparkling clean dished heathens

[cryoverkiltmilk]

These other assholes: Oh I hate leaving a mess. Cleaning up actually helps me unwind!

My ADHD executive-dysfunctional fuckin goblin self: I have to perform a TASK? But I just performed a task YESTERDAY!

[elidyce]

Some people simply do not understand the profoundly Sisyphean torment that is cleaning things.

Dishes.

Clothes. 

House.

Self.

IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW OFTEN YOU DO IT, YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO DO IT AGAIN. DOPAMINE PAYOFF IS ZERO, THE TASK IS NEVER COMPLETED AND YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO STOP DOING IT EVER IN YOUR WHOLE LIFE.

[octobaba]

[stoopid-head]

Just got dumped, everyone prepare yourself for me to be fucking hilarious for about a month

[imeverywoman420]

maybe you should lay off the weed

Dont ever say some stupid shit like this to me again

[stoopid-head]

The fact that robert pattinson is fucking insane makes him 1000000x hotter I swear to god

[stoopid-head]

Absolutely perfect timing for this post to start getting attention again as I just watched The Batman and am in another full blown obsession with that crazy bastard

[stoopid-head]

[twilight-af-deactivated20220701]

me when I see the pizza delivery guy pull up

[stoopid-head]

Just your daily reminder that Renesmee’s middle name is Carlie

[twilightofficial]

Me, softly to myself every time I make myself a protein shake: Gotta get dat protein in there

[witchyangela]

U good bestie?

I run a twilight blog in 2021… idk if I can legally say yes

[stoopid-head]

A list of actual things I have said in my sleep that I’m convinced would make Edward Cullen fall in love with me if he watched me while I slept.

-“it’s not the same cow it’s a different cow”

-“SPIDERS spiders in the pillow”

-*stands in corner of room blair witch style and cries*

-“I dropped my knife”

-“SHUT UP”

-“what time is it? Wait I remember it’s bedtime”

[stoopid-head]

I love when one of my older posts starts getting attention again and I’m brutally reminded that I have a twilight blog

[twilightsewerposting]

Robert being Robert while filming Breaking Dawn pt 1. I love him 😍💖

[stoopid-head]

sis was really ready to risk it all for that icicle

[stoopid-head]

Hoodie Edward really lives rent free in my head