Xuebing Du
Sweet Seals For You, Always
tumblr dot com
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
NASA
hello vonnie
if i look back, i am lost
Love Begins
EXPECTATIONS
shark vs the universe
Andulka
The Bowery Presents
taylor price
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
roma★
PR's Tumblrdome
No title available
todays bird
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
Game Changer & Make Some Noise
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from Brazil
seen from Italy
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Sweden
seen from T1
seen from United States
seen from Ireland
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Pakistan
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Angola
seen from Türkiye
seen from Indonesia
seen from United States
@storynotesfromhell-blog-blog
A gay Watermelon Man
My partner and I were pitching our ideas for action comedies to a development exec. At the end of the session, he sat back in his chair.
Exec: Those were fun, but you know what I'd like?
Us: No, what?
Exec: A gay 'Watermelon Man.'
Us: You mean like the Godfrey Cambridge thing?
Exec: Yeah, except gay. No one's ever pitched me that.
Tree Of Life isn't a movie, it's a 2 1/2 hour cinematography reel.
Writer friend
Suspense theory
Studio exec's theory on suspense:
"A guy takes a chicken outside the door, says: 'I'm gonna fuck this chicken.' He leaves. Now you've got suspense, see? You don't know when he's gonna fuck that chicken or if he even is gonna fuck that chicken. Do you race out there to defend the chicken? Do you? That's suspense."
What's the quadrant?
At the end of a pitch of a delightful, romantic comedy, the studio exec's only comment was a question: "What's the quadrant?" Off our blank looks, he offered: "The four age groups a movie will appeal to are depicted in the quadrants of a pie chart of the movie-going demographics by age." We quipped that since ours was a family film it would appeal to all quadrants. He seemed miffed by this. "You gotta pick a quadrant." We randomly chose a quadrant and he seemed pleased. "Every screenwriter needs to know the quadrant he's writing for. If you want to make it in this town, you gotta know your quadrants." Note: we still don't know our quadrants nor do we care.
How come no one has made an animated film about gay pigs? You should write a film about gay pigs.
A producer's advice on a new project
Just make sure someone gets killed with a chainsaw. I have a great idea on how to shoot it.
Director giving me a final note on a horror story treatment
High Concept
I was getting ready to graduate film school and was making the rounds at a pitch festival with a dark, character driven basketball drama. The first producer I pitched it to had some concerns:
Producer: Your main character's not likable.
Me: The story's not so much about him being likable as vulnerable.
Producer: Look, I'm not interested. Your main character's not likable and there's no high concept. What's this story about in one sentence? What's the high concept?
Me: The story's about the world of college bas--
Producer: That's not a high concept. A high concept is like... a dairy farmer who's lactose intolerant. That's a high concept.
My other pitches went better.
"There's something about it that I'm not quite sure about. Make your monster more realistic. Maybe it should come from outer space."
Producer after reading my horror film screenplay
Does he have to be gay?
Many years ago, I was a SR VP of Comedy (I'm now a writer) for a TV studio. We developed a pitch with the most flamboyantly, fabulously gay (male) writer who is quite well-known as a playwright in NY who writes primarily about gay men.
The pitch was basically a true and sweet and funny story about a gay man whose sister and small child come to live with him when her husband abandons her. The main character (the gay man) has just lost his lover to AIDS. I couldn't believe this particular network - known more for its fat guys w/gorgeous wives than its textured, smart programming - had bought this pitch, but they claimed to loooove it.
However, when we turned the outline in, I had the following conversation with the Network exec:
Network: The main character seems so sad. Why is he so sad?
Me: Well, his lover has just died from AIDS, so he's sad about that, I think.
Network: Oh no, that can't be the reason he's sad.
Me: OK, I can talk to the writer and see if he can kill his lover another way... though I think he likes the AIDS concept because it's somewhat unique to the gay community.
Network: Well, that's our other note: does the main character HAVE to be gay?
Revolutionary Road is about two people who argue for two hours and then one of them dies.
Writer friend who really hated Revolutionary Road
Give him a ghost
I was talking to someone who had worked in development and who had produced several films of her own. I had given her my script to read and give me notes on a week prior to her calling me and inviting me over for lunch. I arrived there excited that she had read my script.
Her: I haven't read your script yet, but I'll give you some notes anyway.
Me: But don't you want to--
Her: How much do you know about structure?
Me: A lot.
Her: Where's the first act end?
Me: Around page 30...
Her: That's good. That's good. Does your main character have a ghost?
Me: A...
Her: Ah, see, you don't know what a ghost is. Your hero needs something in his past, something that drives him.
Me: Well, actually he does, sort of. It's hard to explain. If you read the--
Her: As long as you give him a ghost, it's fine. It could have been a long lost brother, or a family secret.
Me: I get you, but it'd probably be better if you read the script to see what I mean.
Her: No, that's ok. I know what I'm talking about. People who refuse to use my notes never get produced.
Penguin Cop
One summer, I was working for a credit-less Producer. I did development for over twenty scripts that he was trying to get off the ground. One day, we were sitting outside of a Starbucks in Westwood and I had just pitched him two biopic ideas. I thought they were great stories, but the Producer shook his head. "Those sound like George Clooney movies, and no one likes George Clooney movies", he said. I didn't know how to respond.
The Producer began his pitch. "Here's a movie I've been trying to get made for a while. A Detective loses his partner in the field. This guy is grizzled, tough. One day, he is in the Chief's office. The Chief says to him, 'You have to get a new partner'. The Detective argues that he doesn't need one. The Chief says, 'Too bad. Your new partner is on his way.' Suddenly, there is a knock at the door. The Detective opens the door, but there is no one there. He looks side to side, then looks down. It's a Penguin. The movie is Penguin Cop. You see the Detective and Penguin driving around town. The Detective is talking about a case, but the Penguin can't respond because he is a penguin. The Penguin will help solve the case somehow, I don't know."
The Producer then points to a Harry Potter poster at the theater next door. "I can see it right there. It could be as big as Harry Potter."
I want you to move to Compton
A producer interviewed me for a writing assignment. He had bought a pitch from another writer regarding gang wars in South LA, a story about the rise of rival gang leaders who were bothers. I was very interested in writing the story, but the producer had a request:
Producer: Where do you live?
Me: Century City.
Producer: I want you to move to Compton.
Me: Uh--
Producer: I want you to get some hands-on experience, see the place, experience it before you start writing.
Me: I dunno.
Producer: Just for six months. Live in Compton for six months, I guarantee you the writing will be a lot more authentic.
Me: I could visit Compton, take pictures--
Producer: Nono, you gotta experience it. Feel the place, the vibe. Try and get in touch with some people, talk to some gang members if you can.
Me: Hmm... Let me think about it.
The next day, I called him and politely turned down his offer.
Story Notes From Hell interviewed by indieWIRE
The guys over at indieWIRE recently published an interview with Story Notes From Hell, check it out. Special thanks to Steve Greene for the interview.
I'd also like to thank all our readers for helping the site grow to where it is today. And of course, thanks to the submitters for sharing their stories :)
Be sure to follow us on Twitter as well!
Legends in the lead
Not long ago I was pitching a spec script to an executive (who is now a producer) about two old friends who reunite on a road trip to Vegas.
Executive: Okay, have you thought about who would play these roles?
Me: Yes. . .
Executive: Who do you see in the lead?
Me: I would love to see Paul Newman and Robert Redford play these characters.
Executive: Nobody wants to work with them!
Me: Really?! (looking away in disbelief)
Set it in Appalachia. In 2019.
My first meeting as a young screenwriter: I was sitting next to my manager, whom I didn't even like, but was grateful for, across from some development people. They liked my indie script and asked what I was working on next.
Me: I was thinking about a serial killer that was working in Poland in the 60's.
Exec: No. Poland doesn't sell.
Me: What?
Exec: No one cares about Poland. Set it in Appalachia. (Exec stares at the wall, thinking.) In 2019.
Me: Futuristic? I wasn't thinking about that. Exec: Yeah, think about it. Post-Apocalyptic Appalachia.
My manager: She's not writing a serial killer movie next. She's writing a comedy. Me (quietly to him): But I'm not a comedy writer.
My manager (patting my knee): Yes, yes, you are.
Jets, tanks, boats -- throw it all in!
A writer/producer hired me to write a treatment on an idea of his, a Three Kings-type story set in Afghanistan where a group of marines find $10 million in Al-Qaeda drug money and decide to keep it. I was about halfway finished with the treatment when the producer called me one night, around 3AM.
Producer: I spent the whole day playing this Battlefield game--have you played it?
Me: No.
Producer: It's a military shooter with all kinds of stuff, jets, helicopters, tanks--it's got everything and it's fucking tense!
Me: It's 3 AM.
Producer: We need that in the story.
Me: We need a game?
Producer: Jets, tanks, boats -- throw it all in. An all out war. We can get the studios interested in this if it's got huge action set pieces.
Me: You wanted it to be character-driven, low key--
Producer: Let's try it this way. Start from scratch, these guys are part of a huge offensive against Al-Qaeda.
Me: Uh...
Producer: And the Russians are involved. Maybe the Saudis. They're bankrolling the Afghans with hardware and tech.
Me: Let me think about it. I'll call you tomorrow.
Producer: And try that game. It's fucking tense.