I had to learn early in my relationship with my wife that âI dont knowâ wasnt an answer, it was a signal.
I dont know could mean âIâm sorry, what? This question completely derailed my train of thought.â
It could mean âI have no preference because Iâm in a head empty kind of place today.â
It could mean âYouâre overwhelming me and I canât think please back off a little.â
And if I did not, then it could mean âI dont know what you want from me and I am approaching a full on melt down.â
What I always thought, and what it NEVER meant was âI dont care.â
I feel like learning to recognize these kind of âI donât knowâ signals, AND untraining ourselves that they DONT mean âI dont careâ is so very, very important.