Original Title

Are you confused? Me too. Let's talk about it.

[stresseddepressedandoverdressed]

Time to boil some toes

[absinthundblut]

[law-of-abstraction]

[bubblebaath]

chomp

[stresseddepressedandoverdressed]

If I feel his eyes on my neck but I cannot smell the blood I know he is soaked in, is he really here? Or am I simply dreaming?

[nitewrighter]

You know that whole trope where like, the protagonists get teleported up into the aliens’ spaceship or base or whatever and the alien appears to them only it doesn’t appear as it really looks like but rather, since it doesn’t want to scare the protagonists, it takes the form of something we find familiar and pleasing and is like, “I look like your dad or whatever–is this form okay?” Like I think about that trope a lot and I think like, what if the alien couldn’t pick out a form via telepathy and only had earth media to try and decide what form would scare its human guests least and be accepted almost immediately and honestly the more I think about it the more options for what form that might be are just really fun to me.

“I have chosen the form of your earth playwright and composer Lin-Manuel Miranda–do not be afraid. I come in peace.”

“Greetings. I am Glofnorbo of the cloud you call the ‘Pegasus Nebula.’ I have scanned your earth media from afar and empirically decided that you would find the form of the one known as Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson most pleasing. I have come to confer with your leaders.” 

“Do not be panic. I come in peace. I have assumed the form of your insectoid demigoddess ‘Hatsune Miku’ so that we may communicate peacefully without my true form horrifying you.” 

[nineprotons]

“It was decided that I would assume the form of your ‘Mister Rogers’ in order to best welcome your world to the galactic neighborhood without frightening your kind.”

[gentlemanbones]

“…So did your colleague take on the form of Jack Black for that reason too?”

“No, that is the actual Jack Black. We do not know how to make him leave.”

[westfailia-deactivated20240822]

beginning to get the impression anti-sjws have never actually caught an sjw acting like they think sjws act and only ever mistaken anti-sjws making fun of sjws for the real deal because it’s how they think they act

[afloweroutofstone]

Four-dimensional Ouroboros

[rodentmancy]

[bioillogically]

no name no pronouns please address me by closing your eyes

[kuttithevangu]

The Arctic Fox Research Center in Iceland put cameras in some bird colonies to see if foxes were stealing eggs/chicks

and turns out the foxes were UNJUSTLY ACCUSED

the culprits were horses

[pipistrellus]

HEY THIS IS BAD

[glumshoe]

My grandfather grew up on a farm in Kansas during the Dust Bowl. He and his brother shared a horse named Patches, which they rode to school each day. Despite being poor as shit and not having quite enough to feed their animals, his family noticed that this horse looked great. His coat was unusually glossy and beautiful all of a sudden - he looked healthier than they did. 

The mystery was solved when my grandfather went into the chicken coop to collect eggs, and saw Patches lifting the window cover, pushing his muzzle underneath the hens, and eating the eggs right out of their nests. 

[user274628-deactivated20210126]

Horses have been known to also eat meat.

http://thehorseaholic.com/the-forgotten-story-of-meat-eating-horses/

1) The BBC filmed horses eating fish on a beach of an English Island.

2) In Iceland pastured horses are provided, salted fish as a protein and mineral/salt supplement.

3) Horses have been known to consume raw meat and blood willingly in Arabia, New Zealand, and United States.

4) Lord Chamberlain of Bhutan confirmed that the 40 kings horses routinely received a special meal of Tiger fat and still feed their horses beef, and yak meat.

5) There was an American gelding in 1958 that routinely hunted and killed and even consumed small birds. He also repeatedly attacked humans. He was known as “Freight Train”.

6) Lisette a French mare, killed and consumed a Russian Officer during the Napoleonic Campaign.

[bring-us-back-light]

Horses are now literally the most terrifying shit what the f u c k

[mori-esque]

I love how that list goes “fish, fish, opportunistic and pre-prepared meat, small birds, A WHOLE RUSSIAN OFFICER”

[nikiiwi]

@trufflesmushroom

this is exactly what i mean re: tumblr and horses.

[trufflesmushroom]

@nikiiwi

:( :( :( :((((((( now we know why it’s called a nightMARE

[stresseddepressedandoverdressed]

I wasn't kidding when I said they were omnivores

[gei-may]

I put a lizard in your sock drawer have fun finding it

Why thank you

[stresseddepressedandoverdressed]

I'm a pretentious piece of shit

I think the funniest thing about my blog is that some of my nonsense actually means something, but most of it doesn't really. The trick would be figuring out which was which. But I'll never know if people can tell because they don't ANSWER MY ASKS GOD PEOPLE JUST GIVE ME SOME FEEDBACK

[tastefullyoffensive]

“Not use collective punishment as it is not fair on the many people who did nothing and under the 1949 Geneva Conventions it is a war crime.”

[nu11-pointer]

Wait it’s a fucking WAR CRIME?!?! I mean that might not be 100% accurate but now I gotta know

[tlitookilakin]

holy crap, collective punishment is a war crime.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fourth_Geneva_Convention#Collective_punishments

and according to the exact legal phrasing-

No protected person may be punished for an offense he or she has not personally committed. Collective penalties and likewise all measures of intimidation or of terrorism are prohibited.

This technically counts, as students are civilians, and thus considered a “protected person”. So yes, collective classroom punishment breaks the fourth Geneva Convention, and she should be rewarded for standing up for human rights and doing her research.

[squided]

Power-move: accuse your teacher of a war crime using knowledge they supplied you with

[adventuresinchemistry]

On the care and keeping of your scientist

[bubble-snowflakes]

Congratulations on adopting a scientist! Regardless of their field they will require much coffee, free food, and love. Here are some field specific tips for keeping your scientist happy and healthy!

Biology: make sure they don't get overly invested in their model organism by reminding them about the flaws inherent in their system on a regular basis, but also make sure to join in when they criticize other models in favor of their own

Chemistry: don't let them do that 'just one more reaction' at 10 pm. make sure they get out of the lab and see the sun on a regular basis. try to keep them from partying too hard when they do leave the lab

Geology: humor their rock puns but don't let the lick the rocks (they will tell you they need to lick the rocks to identify them, but don't fall for it)

Astronomy: try not to let them become completely nocturnal. point out nice stars to them and look suitably impressed by their "pictures" of planets that don't look like anything to you

Physics: take them to the park on a regular basis to remind them that things larger than subatomic particles exist. bring a frisbee or a ball to play catch with and be impressed by their ability to calculate trajectories

Math: always make sure to have free batteries for their calculators and a mathmatica user guide on hand. Humor them when they tell you why space without angles is important

Ecology: make sure they remember to wear sunscreen and keep an eye on them in the field. Remind them to come inside and analyze their data occasionally

Psychology: don't mention Freud or ever call them a soft or social science, but make sure you gently remind them that social factors can impact reproducibility and try to keep them from drawing sweeping conclusions about the inherent nature of humanity

Neuroscience: be suitably impressed by their newest experiment and then remind them that people are not mice as often as possible

Computer Science: make sure they take breaks while debugging by limiting their supply of coffee. Nod and smile when they go off on indexing and arrays. Make sure they always have a rubber duck.

Make sure to keep your scientist away from engineers unless they have been properly socialized to interact in a translational household. The most important thing is to remember to hug your scientist on a regular basis and remind them that there is life outside the lab

[trghgjyt5786]

Grape sushi and crab soda. Yim yum

Understandable, have a great day.

[skullvis]

I need to let you all know that I’ve changed my Privacy Policy. I will no longer keep any of my thoughts private. I will now yell every single thought I have out loud at the top of my lungs. There is no way to decline my terms and conditions. I am going to be yelling at the top of my lungs. There is nothing you can do to stop me.

[leave-me-alone-to-suffer]

When pretty people take a picture do they like know that they look great

[stresseddepressedandoverdressed]

Idk, do you know you look great when you take a picture?

[syscoursebluejay1]

Us: -literally anything-

Endos: -writes a fucking novel length long bullshit gibberish bunch of useless information which does nothing but absolutely confuse and manipulate people so they can sit on their throne and say they won-

[stresseddepressedandoverdressed]

It's okay you can say cambrian crew