the best fanfiction you've ever read was written by a woman in her 40s before she made dinner for her kids. it was written by a teenager after school when they should've been studying for a history test. and a barista came up with the idea while they cleaned the espresso machine and busser fact-checked it on their break and the post-doc edited between writing grant proposals and the nurse apologized for typos in the notes after a long shift and behind every drabble and one-shot and multi-chapter fic there is a person with a wonderful and interesting and chaotic life and it is such a privilege that we get to be apart of it because they decided to do this thing we all share, for fun.
cw. something with cum, cheating kink, breeding kink, overstimulation, multiple orgasm, actress reader, aaron is so hot i couldnât help it sorry
gif is from:Â https://at.tumblr.com/konront/aaron-taylor-johnson-in-bullet-train-itw-credit/qqg0ifznc9tl
Someone told me stay away from things that arenât yours. That conversation spinning again and again in your mind while Aaron thrusted into you, his cock was better that you ever thought it would be and you felt mad. at the world, at his wife.
Was that a tattoo of his wifeâs name? You wondered, but blinked a few times, not having enough time to think about that, neither did you care about it, as far as you were concerned, his wife didnât deserve him.
âAaronâŠâ you moaned, bucking your hips against his pelvis, his big, strong hand forcing your body to stay pinned to the mattress. âpleaseâ
âshut up, princessâ he says, one of his hands traveling to your throat and shutting your moans, your brain fully blank, a coherent thought couldnât go through there.
âplease, please, pleaseâ
you pleaded, your thighs tickling because of his previous load of cum, how could that woman get away with all of this? Aaronâs cock was for share â for you â, you could swear your pussy was made to be fucked for this man.
âs-so big, fuck⊠youâre so big, Aaronâ
âYeah? You think princess? If Iâm so big why did I slipped in your tight pussy so easily?â He mocked, his thrusts getting slower while he moved his hand to your clit, still exerting force in your hips.
âNo-no-noâ You cried, while he looked at you with a devilish grin, his thumb playing with your clit, more like torturing it, your pussy creaming his cock, mixing with his cum.
âOh, I see now, babyâ He started, getting his cock out of you and painting your inner thighs with his cum-covered-penis, cleaning himself in you only to go inside again âYouâre so fucking wet. Only a fucking slut can be this wet, princess, are you?â he says and you nod, not really processing what he was asking but giving in anyway âMy fucking slutty princess, arenât you? Fuck⊠you feel so good, so tight for me, princess, wanna see you fucking numb. So cock drunk that the next press conference the only thing you can think about itâs my cockâ
âYes, yes, yes, please, please, wanna cum, Aaron, wanna cum in your cock again, pleaseâ
âGod, you beg so pretty. Such a pretty desperate cum princessâ
And you do as he tells you, as you asked for, reaching the third orgasm of the night. Aaron felt you clenching around him and he takes your knees as close to your head as he cans, thrusting deeper into you, feeling his cock pump full of semen.
âTake your thighs, princess. Donât want them interferingâ His movements are faster, he applies more force to his thrusts trying to get deeper into you. âFuck, thank God the condom ripped. Fuck it feels too good, this pussy should be put in a museum, baby. Gonna make a whole art project about your pussyâ
If you werenât cock drunk, youâd probably laugh at that, but the only thing you could think at that moment was how nice his cum dripping from you every time his cock got out felt. âYou wonder if theyâre looking for us, princess?â
âY-your wife?â He chuckles.
âYeah, my wife may be looking for me. Better get to her, baby. Want you to greet her full of my cum, with it dripping from your pussy while you wear no panties and your tight little skirtâ
You just nod, your thumb now caressing your clit the exact moment his left it, he chuckled, making fun of how desperate you were even if he already made you come three times.
âwanna greet my wife with your pussy full of my cum, princess?â he ask, thrusting one deep time, pulling out to talk again âwanna keep talking to her while your bellyâs full and swollen with my kid?â he thrusts again âsheâll never now Hollywood biggest promise of the decade is being fucked dumb by his husband, is being stuffed by my cumâ
âAaron, Iâm coming, can I cum? Please let me cumâ
âAgain? Go on, babyâ
He says, and you let go, your insides getting wetter, completely wetting his cock once he gets out, squirting on his pelvis and big muscular thighs.
âWow, donât tire yourself, princess. We have all movie tour leftâ
bf!anton x f!r   (  â§áâŠ)   fluff    âââââââżÂ  â clinginess and shirtless ton  1.1k   đ   Â
The apartment is quiet when Anton slips in, the soft click of the door lock followed by the shuffle of his shoes. It's late â much later than he wanted â but rehearsals ran long and no one had the heart to leave until everything was perfect. Still, he hates being away from you for this long.
He drops his bag gently by the door and heads toward the faint blue light coming from the living room.
You're there, curled up on the couch, one leg tossed over a pillow, the other peeking out from beneath the hem of hisoversized shirt â a shirt that hangs off your frame like a blanket. The TV is still playing Ginny & Georgia â of all things â and the remote is loosely gripped in your hand, thumb resting just beside the volume button.
Anton smiles.
You mustâve tried to wait for him.
He pads over and crouches beside you, brushing a few strands of hair from your cheek. Your face is relaxed, lips parted slightly in your sleep. The kind of sleep where nothing could wake you.
Gently, he slips an arm beneath your knees and the other around your shoulders, lifting you bridal style. You stir a little, nose scrunching as you unconsciously curl against him, tucking your face into the crook of his neck.
His heart melts.
âOf course you're cuddly now,â he mumbles with a grin, carrying you to the bedroom.
He lays you down carefully, but before he can even pull away, your hand tugs weakly at his shirt.
âNoâstay.â
He chuckles softly. âBaby, I need to shower. I smell like a gym.â
âDonât care,â you mumble, eyes still shut. âSmell like⊠Anton.â
âI donât even know if thatâs a compliment,â he says, amused. But he presses a kiss to your forehead anyway, lingering for a second longer than necessary.
You let go, eventually, and Anton slips into the bathroom.
The sound of water running fills the apartment. You drift in and out of sleep, only properly waking when you hear the door click open and the faint whirr of a blow dryer. You peek through barely opened eyes.
Heâs standing in front of the mirror, towel around his waist, head bowed slightly as he runs his fingers through his damp hair while drying it. The muscles in his back shift with each movement, and even in your sleepy haze, you canât help but admire the view.
Without a word, you stand and pad across the room. He doesn't notice you until your arms snake around his waist from behind and your cheek presses into his back.
He stills.
Then: âWhy are you awake?â His voice is quieter now, low and sweet, like itâs reserved just for you.
You smirk against his skin. âGod forbid a girl misses her boyfriend.â
Anton lets out a breathy laugh. He turns the dryer off, setting it on the counter.
He twists in your hold, turning to face you. Your arms stay wrapped around him loosely, and he dips his head until your foreheads touch.
âStill sleepy?â he murmurs.
You nod. âMhm.â
âBut not too sleepy to sneak up on me in my towel?â
You smirk. âMaybe I like what I see.â
He raises an eyebrow. âOh? Should I dry my hair more often, then?â
You giggle, fingers tracing the edge of the towel just to mess with him. âYouâre so cocky.â
âAnd yet,â he leans in, brushing your nose with his, âyouâre wearing my shirt. Again.â
âItâs comfortable.â
âItâs mine.â
âAnd Iâm yours,â you counter, eyes twinkling.
He kisses you then â soft, slow, like heâs been waiting for this all day. His hands settle on your hips, thumbs brushing the skin above your shorts, and when he pulls away, you chase his lips instinctively.
âI missed you,â you whisper against his mouth.
âI missed you more,â he says, voice almost a sigh. âCome back to bed with me?â
You nod, eyes fluttering. âOnly if you carry me again.â
He laughs, shaking his head, but he lifts you easily. âSpoiled.â
You nuzzle into his chest, a content smile on your face. âYours.â
ă ## ă   â   PAIRING   âŠÂ   anton   x  fem!reader   â    fluff   //   shirtless ton(again)   +    pet  names ,    âŠÂ          â   m.list   ËÂ
The bed was cold.
You blinked a few times, still tucked in the mess of blankets youâd fallen asleep under with him. But your arms reached out and hit nothing but sheets. Your face scrunched as you turned around fully â empty. No anton. No warmth. No steady breathing in your ear or that slow little sleepy murmur he always did when you shifted beside him.
ââŠthe hell,â you whispered to yourself, still raspy and pouty from sleep.
You dragged yourself out of bed, an oversized t-shirt swallowing your body, hair a little messy and steps wobbly. The apartment was dark, the faint hum of the fridge the only sound. And thenâ
Clink.
The soft sound of a spoon tapping something. You squinted toward the kitchen.
And there he was.
Anton, your sweet, sweet boy, standing by the counter with a glass of water and a tub of yogurt, shirtless in those grey sweats â the ones you swore he wore on purpose when he wanted to ruin your nightâs peace. His hair was messy, like heâd been running his hands through it, his eyes still puffy with sleep.
You stared.
You always stared.
And then you moved, padding across the floor until you were behind him. You wrapped your arms around his waist from the back, face pressing between his shoulder blades with a soft little sigh.
He froze for a second. And then you felt the way his back shook with a quiet chuckle.âCouldnât sleep without me, huh?â
his voice was husky, slow, laced in that late-night softness that made you melt every time.
âI woke up and you were gone,â you mumbled into his skin, already frowning. âNot cute. I was cold.â
He turned around slowly in your arms,
and his hands found your waist immediately â warm, big palms running lazy circles on the small of your back.
âI didnât wanna wake you,â he said gently, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. âYou looked so cute sleeping.â
You hugged him tighter, burying yourself into his chest. âLetâs go back to bed.â
He chuckled softly, letting you hold him like he was the blanket youâd been missing. His arms circled your waist again, pulling you in with this slow, sleepy strength that always felt so secure â like you could fall asleep standing up in his arms and itâd still be the safest place in the world.
âI was literally gone for 10 minutes,â he whispered into your hair.
âToo long,â you mumbled back. âMissed you.â
You felt his smile against your scalp, and he kissed your head, a little longer this time. âYouâre so clingy when youâre sleepy.â
âAm not,â you grumbled, already burrowing further into him.
âYou are,â he laughed gently, âbut I like it.â
You were quiet for a moment, just letting yourself melt into his chest â the steady beat of his heart, the heat of his bare skin under your palms. His hand rubbed slow circles into your lower back, like he was trying to memorize the curve of you all over again.
And then, out of nowhereâ
âWait⊠why are you shirtless?â you suddenly asked, brows furrowing as you pulled back to look at him. âIsnât it cold?â
He blinked, deadpan. ââŠYou always steal the blanket.â
You gasped. âThatâs not trueâ!â
âIt is. I literally woke up freezing,â he said, fake serious. âYou had all the covers wrapped around you like a sushi roll.â
You laughed â a sleepy, snorty giggle that made his heart do flips. And then your fingers brushed down his abs, featherlight. Not for any reason. Just⊠touch.
âWell, Iâll keep you warm now,â you said with a pout, reaching up to kiss his jaw â then his cheek â then the tip of his nose.
He blinked slowly, the tips of his ears pinking.
ââŠYouâre not gonna let me eat my yogurt, are you.â
âNope,â you said, all smug and clingy, tugging him back toward the bedroom by the waistband of his sweats. âYou can have breakfast in the morning. Right now I need cuddles. Urgently.â
âYes maâam,â he sighed playfully â but there was no resistance.
Back under the covers, he tangled his legs with yours, pressed his chest to your back, and whispered, âIs this better?â against your neck.
You just hummed, half-asleep already.
âBest boyfriend ever,â you mumbled, and he smiled so hard it hurt.
He kissed your shoulder â and finally, finally let himself fall back asleep, now that his favorite girl was warm in his arms again.
âđ€ :: weâre getting less and less creative with those imagine nameđ„ (idk if thats even the right wordâŠ)
â” summary: The Marauders hold a silent grudge against you for falling in love with the younger Black, until one day everything comes out in an argument, and Sirius has no choice but to find his brother, and see for himself how much he loves you.
â” word count: 2k
â” tw: swearing, arguing, panic/ anxiety, slut shaming
â” a/n: lowkey kinda proud of this? pulled this idea outta my ass while zoning out at work and had to write it as soon as I got home lol. anyway, im on a real writing kick right now I have so many ideassss! happy reading xo MIZ
    ââ*.·:·.⧠⊠â§.·:·.*ââ
You never spoke of your relationship to your friends.
They never asked questions when you would leave, saying you had plans, they didnât approach you when theyâd spot you hand in hand in the halls, a bright smile beaming on your face.
But you saw the resentment.
You saw Sirius grit his teeth anytime his name would accidentally slip past your lips.
You saw Remusâ eyes fall when he saw you with him in the courtyard.
You saw Jamesâ fake smile when youâd show him your new jewelry and dresses that he knew you didnât buy for yourself.
You heard the girlsâ disapproving whispers when youâd leave your dorm to meet him.
It broke your heart every time. You wished to be able to talk freely about your love without feeling guilty, you wanted to bring him to your weekly game nights, you wanted to go to Hogsmeade during Christmas with everybody and get butterbeers and giggle as snowflakes clung onto all your eyelashes. You wanted to share that community with him.
But you loved Regulus more than any of those things.
summary: after your rough breakup with regulus black, you swore you were done. but when a curse in defense against the dark arts leaves you bleeding on the floor, he loses control. in the infirmary, with too much history between you, everything you buried resurfaces.
word count: 4.6k
warnings: exâs to lovers, second chance, mentions of physical injury, blood, trauma response, references to past abuse, emotional distress, anxiety attacks, panic episodes, reader experiencing PTSD symptoms, mommy issues, relationship conflict, themes of grief and healing, happy ending
There are, one discovers through the steady unraveling of life, many kinds of people one is destined to meet.Â
Some enter briefly, passing across the stage of our existence with no more significance than the flicker of a candle extinguished before its warmth is felt. A stranger who lends you a quill. A student you pass by daily, whose name you never bother to learn.Â
Others linger for years in the periphery of our lives, familiar in form but forgettable in essence; classmates whose faces become part of the scenery, whose presence we tolerate, but seldom invite closer.
And then, inevitably, there are the ones who stay. The ones who take root. Friends who become fixtures in our hours, our patterns, our very way of moving through the world. These are the companions who anchor us, shape us, and sometimes save us.
But of all the categories of human interaction, the most treacherousâby far the most damagingâare those who fall into that final, cruel compartment: the ones we spend a great deal of time loving, and even longer trying to forget.
Unfortunately for you, there are not one but two such individuals who haunt that particular category.Â
The first is your mother, a woman of remarkable cruelty and unrelenting spite, whose presence in your life has left wounds no healing spell has yet managed to erase. Her voice remains embedded in the back of your mind, an echo that resurfaces in moments of quiet, and most especially in moments of fear.Â
She is, by all accounts, what one might imagine the devil would send if he himself were otherwise detained.
And then there is Regulus Black.
Your ex-lover.
He occupied your heart for six brief months, and has plagued your memory for over a year since. In the hierarchy of harm, he should rank second; he did not raise you, did not abuse you, did not imprison you in your own home.Â
And yet, in certain hours of the night, it is his name that claws to the surface first, his voice that revisits you in your dreams, not with crueltyâbut with absence. With silence. With the terrible emptiness of what might have been.
You do not know which wound is more exhausting: the one left by the mother you were born to, or the one left by the boy who told you he loved you and then disappeared so thoroughly it felt like grief.Â
What you do know is that you have, at the very least, escaped one of them. Your mother is not here. Hogwarts, for all its horrors, is mercifully free of her presence.
Regulus, however, is another matter entirely.
You see him no fewer than three times a day. Sometimes across the Great Hall, his expression unreadable beneath the sweep of dark hair. Sometimes in the library, hunched over his parchment with the same precision he used to study you.Â
And sometimesâlike nowâyou find him walking directly toward you, claiming proximity with the casual grace of someone who does not feel the ground shift beneath your feet when he appears.
He is here for a book. That is all. A book Remus happens to have tucked under his arm. The corridor is quiet, the class bell not yet rung. You had been mid-conversation with Remus, about Arithmancy of all things, when you felt the air change.
You did not need to look to know it was him.
And yet, of course, you did.
Now he stands before you, perfectly composed, as if he does not know the state of your hands, the sudden sweat on your palms, the weight in your chest.Â
As if you are no more significant to him than any other girl waiting beside her friend. As if he has not occupied every corner of your memory for the past twelve months.
âLupin,â he says, his voice smooth and quiet, carrying just enough weight to command attention without raising its volume. âYou still have that copy of Magical Theory I lent you last month?â
Remus adjusts the strap of his bag. âI do,â he replies, with an expression that flickers between casual politeness and something more watchful. âWas wondering if youâd ever come for it.â
âI meant to earlier,â Regulus says. âLife interfered.â
His eyes shift momentarily toward you, too fleeting to be called a glance, scarcely more than a subtle movement.Â
Yet somehow, it ignites a warmth within you. You lower your gaze to the floor, as though it might provide a refuge from the weight of that silent acknowledgement.
Remus reaches into his bag and withdraws the book. âHere,â he says. âTry not to annotate the margins next time. Some of us actually care what the author meant.â
Regulus takes the book with a quiet nod. âNoted.â
You wait until he turns the corner before your shoulders finally drop, teeth clenched so tightly your jaw begins to ache.Â
You exhale harshly through your nose, then turn on your heel, your shoes hitting the stone floor with unforgiving purpose.
âThis is ridiculous,â you mutter, storming ahead, your robes flaring behind you. âWhy the hell is he everywhere I go?â
Remus hurries after you, a half-confused, half-amused expression tugging at his mouth. âIs it my fault Regulus wanted a bloody book?â
âOh, donât act innocent,â you snap, grabbing his sleeve and pulling him down a side corridor. âWhy are you even talking to him?â
He blinks in surprise. âBecause heâs at Hogwarts, in the same school, studying in the same halls and library? I am not twelve, severing ties as if cutting a frayed thread. Some connections persist whether we want them to or not.â
You stop short. âWell, you are breaking the biggest girl code ever.â
Remus blinks, confused. âPardon? Girl what?â
âYou heard me. Girl code.â
He raises a brow. âIâm not even a girl!â
âYouâre gay!â you fire back without missing a beat. âGirl code applies.â
He throws his head back and laughs, hand over his chest as if you have just confessed your undying love. âI cannot believe this is happening.â
You glare. âYou are not supposed to associate with your friendâs ex. Especially when heâs an emotionally constipated bastard who left me without a single decent explanation. Whatâs next? You going to lunch with him and chatting about his new broomstick?â
âIâm sorry!â he says, still chuckling. âBut in all seriousness, youâre acting like he cursed your name into a grave.â
âRemus,â you hiss, pulling him closer by the edge of his robe. âYou donât get it. Every time I think Iâm okay, every time Iâm having a semi-decent day, he appears. He just slinks in like some bloody ghost and ruins everything.â
âYou hate him that much?â
âI hate that heâs still here. I hate that I spent six months giving everything to someone who couldnât give me one sentence of honesty in return!â
Thereâs a long pause. Remus watches you carefully now, the humor softening into something gentler.
âYou know,â he says quietly, âit bothers you that he doesnât look bothered.â
You freeze.
âThatâs what this is,â he goes on, his voice not unkind. âYouâre mad because he ended it, and he walks around like he doesnât regret it.â
You scoff, though it sounds brittle in your throat. âDonât be ridiculous. Iâve moved on.â
âHave you?â
âI have,â you say, too quickly. âHe ended things because of his own issues or whatever, which, by the way, he never even told me about. Just decided I didnât need to know, like I wasnât worth the effort.â
Remus sighs, eyes flicking toward the stained glass window at the end of the corridor. âHe didnât think he could make you stay.â
âI wouldâve stayed,â you whisper.
âI know,â he replies. âBut Regulus doesnât believe anyone stays.â
You feel something hot sting the backs of your eyes, but you blink it away.Â
Youâve cried enough over Regulus Black to fill every basin in the castle.
âWell,â you say, lifting your chin, âhe was wrong, because now Iâm gone. And this time, Iâm the one whoâs staying gone.â
âWell,â Remus began, his tone far too casual for your liking, âIâm afraid I must tell you that you do share a class with Regulus Black. Defense Against the Dark Arts, to be precise.â
You blink slowly, dread blooming like a headache. âI feel like this entire week has been designed to ruin me.â
Remus offered a small nod, watching as you turned and made your way toward your classroom. You exchanged a brief glance, an unspoken understanding passing between you, before each of you vanished into the corridors leading to your separate lessons.
The classroom is already half-full by the time you arrive. Pandora catches your eye and gestures to the seat beside her near the front. You gratefully accept and settle in.Â
Moments later, the chair behind you scrapes against the floor, and without needing to turn, you know who it is. Of course it is him. Regulus Black. The universe never misses an opportunity to mock you.
The professor strides into the room with a quiet authority, his robes flowing behind him as he surveys the class.
âWands out,â he commands without preamble. âToday we continue our practice of spell deflection and countering dark magic. If you failed to revise over the weekend, I advise you remain silent and take diligent notes. This lesson will be entirely practical.â
A few students murmur in quiet protest. You share a brief glance with Pandora, who offers a small, knowing smile.
Pairs are assigned swiftly. Pandora finds herself paired with Dorcas, while you are left with a boy whose uncertain grip on his wand betrays his inexperience, as if he cannot quite discern which end poses the true danger.Â
The duel begins with harmless exchanges. Spells burst into vivid flashes of light, Protego charms shimmer and ripple like liquid glass, and stunning spells bounce in practiced arcs.Â
You move through the motions with practiced detachmentâcast, block, repeatâfinding solace in the rhythm that dulls the edges of your anxiety. Your partner flinches at every near miss but perseveres.Â
Gradually, you settle into a steady cadence, grateful for the distraction it provides from the presence a few feet behind you: Regulus Black, undoubtedly observing your every move with an inscrutable gaze.
And then something shifts.
It happens so fast you almost miss it â a wand flicks too hard across the room, a shield charm is cast too late. A spell that was meant to be redirected suddenly veers off its original path.Â
It slices through the air with a sound thatâs too loud, too sharp. The kind of sound magic makes when it goes wrong.
You see it out of the corner of your eye. A bolt of deep violet light, spiraling toward you in a jagged line.Â
Before you can react, it hits.
The curse slams into your side like a live wire. You stagger backward, your wand slipping from your fingers as your entire left side lights up with blinding heat.Â
Your shoulder crashes into the desk behind you. The air tears from your lungs.
Thereâs a split second of silence before the chaos.
You collapse to your knees. The floor feels far too cold beneath your palms. A ragged breath escapes you, but it catches halfway.Â
Pain spreads through your ribs like someoneâs carving fire through them, sharp and hot and crawling beneath your skin. You press a hand to your side and it comes away wet.
Red, bright, and vivid red.
Your name rings out, repeated more than once, but the sound feels distant, muffled, as if heard from beneath water.
âDo not move!â the professorâs voice commands, cutting sharply through the noise. You flinch at the sudden intensity. âEveryone, step back.â
Yet before the room can obey, firm hands grasp your shouldersâsteady, anchoring. For a moment, you believe it to be Pandora, but then a gentler touch brushes your hair aside, and your name is spoken once more, quieter this time, urgent.
The world around you bursts into chaos.
Voices rose in panic. Footsteps thundered against the stone floor. The professorâs sharp commands cut through the chaos, urgent calls for help echoing around you.
You curled on the cold floor, your side burning with a fierce, unyielding pain.
Hands reached for you hesitantly, some too firm, others too gentle. Shadows flickered in the candlelight as the heat and noise closed inâtoo much, too close.
And suddenly, your mind is no longer in the classroom.
You are nine years old again, backed into the far corner of the drawing room. The wallpaper is peeling. The curtains are drawn. The air smells like ash and liquor and old perfume.Â
Your motherâs voice is a velvet snarl, sweet and poisonous. Her wand is steady, raised like a promise, and you are not fast enough to run this time.
The spell hits your shoulder. You remember the way it feltâthe tearing heat, the way your skin split without bleeding, the way she looked bored as you screamed.Â
You remember the way no one came.
Back in the present, your chest heaves. The pain in your side is spreading, but it is nothing compared to the one cracking open inside your skull.Â
You shove at the hands reaching for you and hear yourself cry out.Â
âGet off me,â you sob, though no one is holding you anymore.
You clutch your side with trembling hands, shaking your head, rocking forward, trying to escape a memory you cannot outrun.
âShe is in shock,â someone says, far away and echoing.
âI need everyone to back away,â the professorâs voice cuts through the haze, sharp and commanding. âNow!â
You are sobbing uncontrollably now, your entire body convulsing with it. It is not the pain of your wound that has undone you. It is memory. It is fear so old and familiar it has worn grooves into your bones.
âCan she hear us?â
âMerlin, she is bleeding through her robesââ
âShe is panickingâshe is not breathing rightââ
You want to tell them to stop. You want to scream until the noise stops, until the hands disappear, until your motherâs voice fades from the corners of your mind.
But all you can do is cry.
Cry and tremble and bleed.
Cry and fold into yourself like you used to, like you always have, like it is the only thing that has ever kept you safe.
And for the first time in a very long time, you feel utterly, irrevocably powerless.
Regulus reaches you first. His presence carves through the panic like a blade through water, sharp and inevitable, silencing the rush of footsteps and the flurry of voices.
âMove,â he says, his voice low yet carrying an authority that makes the crowd hesitate.Â
When no one obeys quickly enough, his tone sharpens into something unmistakably furious. âMove the fuck away from her!â
He drops to his knees beside you, the wool of his robes brushing the stone floor, and for the smallest moment his hands hover, trembling slightly, before he gathers you into his arms.Â
The movement is careful, protective, and almost desperate, as though he fears you might dissolve into nothing if he holds you too tightly.
Your cheek finds the sharp line of his shoulder, and you feel the rise and fall of his breathing, quick and uneven.Â
His hand presses lightly to your back, the other cupping the side of your face as though to anchor you.
âBreathe,â he murmurs gently by your ear, his voice soft and laden with unspoken affection. The fury from before fades into a trembling vulnerability, as if your pain unsettles him to his core. âPlease, just breathe for me. It is done now. You are safe in my armsâno one will ever hurt you again. I swear it. I will not let go.â
You cling to him without thought, your hands fisting into his robes so tightly that you feel the fabric strain. He holds you just as fiercely, his head bowing until his temple rests against yours.
âShe needs space!â he shouts suddenly at the few students who dare step closer, his voice snapping like a whip. âDo not come near her!â
The professorâs voice calls for Madam Pomfrey, hurried and strained, but you hardly hear it over the pounding of your heart.Â
Regulus rocks you slightly, murmuring in low tones that you cannot entirely understand, only catching fragments. âStay with me⊠just a little longer⊠you are here, not thereâŠâ
You are trembling so violently that your teeth ache from the force of it, and still you do not loosen your grip.Â
Your mind flickers between the present and the past until it becomes unbearable, and the last thing you feel is the steady, protective cage of his arms before everything fades to black.
***
When you open your eyes, the air smells faintly of antiseptic potions and the crisp, laundered sheets beneath you are unfamiliar. The ceiling is high and white, the room softly lit. Your side throbs with a dull, persistent ache.
Regulus is sitting beside your bed. His elbows rest on his knees, his hands clasped loosely, his head lowered in thought. He looks nothing like the cold, distant boy you have seen for the past year.Â
There is a rawness in his expression, a weight in the shadows beneath his eyes that makes him appear older, thinner, almost as though the worry has been consuming him for longer than you can comprehend.
The moment you stir, his head lifts sharply. His eyes, dark and searching, find yours, and in that instant, he is on his feet.Â
Without a word, he strides to the door and calls for Madam Pomfrey, his voice edged with relief and urgency.
The matron sweeps in with brisk efficiency, her wand already in hand. âYou gave us quite a scare,â she says, moving to your side and inspecting the area where the curse struck.Â
Her wand hovers, emitting a faint golden glow. âYou took a direct hit from a poorly cast Stinging Hex. Normally it would leave only a welt, but the spell was overcharged, which accounts for the severity of your pain. The student responsible has been assigned two weeksâ detention, and your professor was furious enough to petition for expulsion. The Headmaster intervened, so it will not come to that, but rest assured it will not happen again.â
You nod faintly, the words slipping over you like water without truly sinking in.
Madam Pomfrey continues, âYou will feel discomfort for several days. The damage to the muscle has been repaired, but it will remain tender. Avoid strenuous movement, and come back for a check-up tomorrow morning.âÂ
She sets a small vial on the table. âFor the pain. Do not take more than two sips at a time.â
Once she leaves, the room is silent again except for the faint rustle of the sheets as you shift. Your gaze drifts back to Regulus.
âYou stayed,â you murmur, your voice quieter than you intended.
The moment the curtain shuts behind Madam Pomfrey, he crosses the short space between your bed and the chair he had been occupying, his movements sharp with urgency.Â
âAre you in pain? Does anything still hurt?â His eyes move across your face and shoulders and down to where your side is bandaged, his expression tight with something between fear and anger.
You shake your head, though the dull ache in your ribs remains. It is not the pain that feels unbearable now, but the fact that he is here, leaning over you, close enough for his breath to brush your cheek.Â
âRegulus,â you murmur, your voice scratchy from the earlier screaming, âwhat are you doing here?â
His eyes flash, the crease between his brows deepening. âWhat am I doing here? What kind of question is that?â He pulls his hand back, as though your words have burned him. âYou were lying on the floor, shaking, barely breathing. Of course I am here.â
Your lips press together, the faintest tremor in your jaw. âYou have spent a year avoiding me. I thought you made it clear that my wellbeing was no longer your concern.â
He exhales through his nose, sharp and incredulous. âThat is what you think? That I could watch you suffer and simply walk away?â
âIs that not exactly what you did before?â Your tone sharpens without your meaning to, the words tasting of months of hurt.Â
âYou left, Regulus. You left without a word, and now you appear out of nowhere, acting as though you have the right to stand here andââ
He cuts you off, his voice suddenly louder. âDo you think I wanted to leave? Do you think I did it lightly?â His hand runs through his hair, the gesture breaking the perfect composure he used to guard so jealously. âI had reasons. You would not have understood.â
Your gaze hardens. âI would have understood if you had given me the chance! I would have stood beside you, no matter what, but you never gave me the choice. You just vanished.â
His voice drops to something quieter, almost desperate. âI thought I was protecting you.â
You shake your head, your voice shaking now. âYou were protecting yourself. You decided I could not handle the truth, or that I was better off without you, and you did not even let me fight for us.â
There is a silence so heavy it feels as though the room itself is holding its breath. His eyes do not leave yours, and in them you see the glimmer of something painfully familiar, something you have not seen in a year.
When he speaks again, the words seem torn out of him. âI never stopped caring for you. Not for one day. I stayed away because I thought it was safer.â
Your own breath hitches, the anger still burning but tangled now with something warmer and far more dangerous. âYou cannot say things like that, Regulus. Not after everything.â
His voice softens, but the intensity in it remains. âI am saying it because it is the truth. I stillââ He stops, his jaw tightening as though the admission is almost too much. âI still love you. And I canât help that.â
Your voice cracks when you finally say it. âWhat do you mean you still love me, Regulus?â
His head jerks back slightly, as though the words hit harder than any hex. âYou heard me,â he says, his tone sharp, almost defensive. âDo not act surprised.â
âHow could I not be surprised?â Your fingers knot into the blanket, your chest rising too fast. âYou walked away and you never looked back.â
He takes a step closer, his expression tightening. âAnd you think that means I stopped caring?â
âIt means you stopped everything!â The pitch of your voice trembles. âYou stopped writing, you stopped meeting me, you stoppedââ Your throat closes.Â
Something flashes behind his eyes, frustration sparking like flint. âI never stopped.â
The heat in the room becomes unbearable. You swing your legs off the bed, the urge to escape flooding your body, but as soon as your feet touch the ground, pain lances through your side and you stumble forward.
In a heartbeat his arms are around you, one hand braced at your waist, the other steadying your back.Â
He lifts you effortlessly, setting you down again with such precision it feels almost angry.
âWould you just listen to me, woman?â His voice is low and fierce, his face only inches from yours. You can feel the rush of his breath against your cheek, the tension humming between your bodies.
Your heartbeat rattles in your ribs. âThen talk.â
âWhy do you think I pretend to want Lupinâs wretched annotated books?â His tone grows sharper with each word.Â
âWhy do you think I force our schedules to match? Why do I visit the Gryffindor tower under the excuse of seeing Sirius? It is because I bloody care about your well-being! I always have. So do not, for one moment, question me.â
His gaze holds yours with an intensity that steals your breath. Slowly, deliberately, he closes the distance between you. When his lips meet yours, it is as if all the years of silence, pain, and longing have been building toward this one desperate, fervent momentâfierce, unyielding, and weighted with all the words he never found the courage to speak.
When you finally drew back, the space between you was narrow enough for his breath to brush against your cheek.Â
âI owe you an apology,â he said at last, his voice softer now but still unwavering. He reached up, gently cupping your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing lightly against your cheeks.Â
After a heartbeat, he leaned closer, closing the small space between you just enough to let his breath mingle with yours. âFor every moment I left you to wonder whether you mattered to me, for allowing you to believe that you were a passing sentiment instead of the one truth I have carried with me all these years.â
He paused, his forehead resting lightly against yours. âI was a coward in the way I walked away, and I will regret it for as long as I live.â
You parted your lips to answer, but before the words could form, the curtain at your bedside was suddenly pulled aside. Sirius and Remus peeked in, their eyes immediately taking in the quiet intimacy between you and Regulus.
Siriusâs voice cut through the stillness with a teasing edge. âHi!âwaitâwhat exactly is going on here?â
Remusâs hand shot out, grabbing Sirius by the collar and pulling him back. âLet them have their moment, will you?â he muttered, dragging Sirius away gently but firmly.
âOww! Fine, fine,â Sirius grumbled, shooting you a cheeky grin as he retreated.
As the curtain swished closed behind them, a short laugh escaped you both, the tension easing as your conversation resumed.
With a sly smile, you tilted your head and leaned in just enough to catch his attention. âNow that I realizeâŠâ you began, your eyes sparkling with mischief.
Your fingers slid up to the collar of his robe, tugging him gently but deliberately closer until the space between you vanished.
âDoes that mean you were sneaking books from Remus just to see me?â you teased softly, your voice dripping with playful accusation.
Regulusâs cheeks flushed a shade deeper, an almost imperceptible crack in his usual composed facade. âStop it,â he muttered, half embarrassed, half amused.
âOh, come now,â you coaxed, your grin widening. âYou must have known Iâd find out eventually. Was I your secret motivation to studying all along?â
He swallowed, then tilted his head slightly, eyes searching yours with something softer, hopeful. âDoes that mean⊠I can be your boyfriend again?â
You feigned hesitation, arching a brow with theatrical deliberation. âHmm. I donât know, Black. Does that mean youâll get all depressed and disappear on me again?â
His lips quirked into a pout, the vulnerability both infuriating and endearing. âI thought you liked your boys a little depressed.â
You laughed quietly, brushing a stray lock of hair from his forehead. âOnly if itâs you.â
His smile was genuine now, a rare and precious thing. âSo, I am forgiven?â
âAbsolutely,â you said softly, squeezing his hand. âBut only if you promise to stick around this time.â
He leaned in, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. âFor you, Iâll try very hard.â
A gentle smile curved your lips, warmth radiating from your gaze. âGood,â you whispered, your voice barely above a breath. âBecause there is something I need to hear from you.â
Slowly, you lifted your hands to cradle his face, your fingers tracing the line of his jaw as your eyes locked with his. âPromise me this,â you murmured, your tone both tender and resolute, âno more secrets between us. No more disappearing without a word. I want all of you, completely, without reservation.â
His smile softened as he leaned into your touch. âAll of me is yours, amour.â
For a moment, you simply held each otherâs gaze, the world outside fading into quiet stillness.Â
Then, with deliberate gentleness, he leaned in slowly, his breath warm against your cheek as his eyes searched yours for any hesitation.Â
When none came, he pressed his lips softly to yours, a kiss that held both promise and forgiveness, tender and unwavering.
As he pulled back just enough to rest his forehead against yours, he whispered, âJust donât die on me, alright?â
You chuckled softly, the sound bubbling up effortlessly. âIâll try not to.â
A mischievous glint sparked in his eyes as he smiled. âJe tâaime.â
You rolled your eyes with a playful grin. âGosh, I missed your French accent.â
He laughed, shaking his head. âIâll make sure to practice just for you, amour.â
hello !! i absolutely adore your marauders fics so much :)
i was wondering if i could request a remus lupin x fem reader fic (reader is an animagus) where theyâre in a relationship with eachother however recently remus has been very sassy and sarcastic with her (i am a firm believer in sassy remus lupin, i hc that he can be so annoying sometimes đ), and reader is getting really fed up with it so she punishes him by transforming into her animagus form (her animal could be a cat or a rabbit, i donât really mind) and she gives him the silent treatment by glaring at him menacingly as her animagus
i just think this would be such a funny and petty way to get back at remus đ
Cattitude Problem
Remus Lupin x fem!reader
summary: in which remus has been insufferably smug all day, pushing you to shift into snickers, your sleek orange cat animagus, to escape his relentless teasing. leaving him to try and win your forgiveness while keeping your claws at bay, but it seems snickers (you) has her own mischievous plans to drive remus just as mad as he has driven you.
warnings: mild language, persistent teasing, light emotional tension, pet behavior, affectionate stubbornness, reader being extremely stubborn and petty, lots of ignored apologies, verbal sparring, emotional vulnerability, occasional sarcasm, remus being a sassy little shit, remus pov where he is so in love, reader's animagi is called snickers, fluff.
w/c: 3.8k masterlist
Remus has been insufferable all morning.
Which wouldnât be unusual if it werenât for the fact that you actually love himâ which, unfortunately, makes everything worse.Â
Because when someone you love spends the entire day being casually, infuriatingly smug, it doesnât hit like a joke. It lands like the sting of a rubber band snapping against your skin: quick, deliberate, and just painful enough to make you flinch.
It started at breakfast. Youâd woken up late, your hair had declared mutiny, and the last slice of toast had vanished without a trace. Still half-asleep and already on edge, youâd muttered somethingâless a complaint than a sigh scraped out of frustration.Â
And Remus, seated across from you in infuriating serenity, calmly buttering his toast like he had all the time in the world, had the nerve to say,
âYouâd find mornings easier if you actually prepared for them the night before.â
That was all it took. One sentence, spoken casually and without a care, and somehow you wanted to launch the entire plate at his head.
You didnât. Mostly because you still had a shred of dignity. And partly (entirely) because Remus Lupin, infuriating as he was, looked so bloody handsome.
Even sitting down, he somehow managed to tower over everything. One arm slung across the back of his chair, legs sprawled like he owned the bloody sun, and a piece of toast held delicately between his fingers like it had earned the right to be touched by him.
You were not proud of the thought, but God, you wouldâve traded your soul to be that toast.
Golden and warm, pressed to his lips, held like it belonged there.
You werenât proud of it. But there it was.
Youâd looked at him then, waiting for a smirk, a wink, something to break the tension. But he didnât even glance up. Just folded the edge of the Daily Prophet like he hadnât said anything at all.
And the worst part? This fucker knew he was dreamy. Knew it in the smug little way he wore sleep-soft curls and slouchy cardigans, like the universe had handed him beauty on a silver platter and he hadnât even bothered to say thank you.
Which is precisely why it had been barely an hour since he woke up, and already he was getting on your nerves instead of your pants.
Unbelievable.
And that was only the first strike. The rest of the morning followed suit.
In Defense, when your wand sputtered and your spell tangled mid-air before fizzling out completely, you stumbled a step back, catching yourself on the edge of a desk.
Remus didnât laugh. That wouldâve been too kind.
He just tilted his head and said, âClose,â in a tone that made it perfectly clear it wasnât.
Later, in the corridor, when you claimedâaccurately and with mounting exasperationâthat one of the staircases had shifted mid-step and nearly launched you into the abyss, he simply blinked.
You stood there, arms crossed, waiting.
When you finally snapped, âWhat?â, biting down the urge to throw a shoe at him, he only shrugged.
âNothing. Youâre just⊠you.â
And somehow, that was worse than any insult.
Now itâs evening, and heâs back in the common room, perfectly at ease as if nothing had happened. He sprawls in his usual chair, a blanket draped casually over one knee, a book balanced effortlessly in one hand.
You linger in the doorway, jaw tightening without conscious thought. His eyes lift, as if drawn by the very weight of your silent ire, and he meets your gaze with that infuriatingly placid expression heâs worn all dayâcalm, unreadable, and utterly maddening.
âYouâre still sulking, then?â His voice is low, smooth, laced with vague amusement.
You say nothing.
He flips a page like itâs the most natural thing in the world and adds, almost as an afterthought, âHope you found the scarf, by the way. Would be a shame if you lost another thing you swore you didnât misplace.â
Your fingers twitch, restless and sharp at your sides.
You donât know what irritates you moreâhis words, or the effortless way he delivers them, offhand, like heâs commenting on the weather instead of poking at your temper with a feather.
You step further into the room, arms folding across your chest like a shield.
âI didnât lose it,â you say sharply, voice tight.
âMhm,â he replies, turning the page with an air of practiced disinterest.
You wait for an apology, a joke, somethingâbloody anything.
But there is only the soft rustle of parchment and the maddening scrape against the corner of the page as he folds it back into place.
He doesnât even bother pretending to be interested?!
âYouâre doing that thing again,â you say, arms still crossed tightly over your chest, your voice taut with the frustration youâve been holding in all morning.
He barely lifts his head but arches an eyebrow, that infuriating smirk playing at the corner of his mouth. âWhich thing exactly?â
âThat thing where you act like youâre listening, like youâre actually paying attention to what Iâm saying, but really youâre just waiting for me to exhaust myselfâwaiting until I give up on arguing.â
He lets out a quiet chuckle, almost indulgent, as if this bickering between you has been rehearsed a thousand times before.Â
âYou know, you usually do,â he says softly, with a tone that drips equal parts amusement and quiet certainty.
You narrow your eyes and press, âDo what? Wear myself out? What exactly do you mean by that?â
His smile widens just enough to reveal the smugness beneath. âI mean you get so worked up, so tangled in your own frustration, that before long youâre done. You stop fighting, because youâve run out of steam.â
His words settle in the air like a weight you hadnât expected, sharper than any insult you could have thrown.
Fine, Remus.
There is only a long breath you never fully take, and with a sly tilt of your head, you shift.
The room falls silent, as if holding its breath in anticipation.
You curl into yourself, bones reshaping and fur sprouting in a rush of magic.
Your limbs shorten, claws extend, and the familiar sleek orange coat of Snickers, your Animagus form, ripples across your skinâevery graceful line and stripe settling into place as you become the cat he knows so well.
You leap lightly onto the arm of his chair, your paws sinking into the worn fabric with deliberate grace.Â
Settling yourself, you curl your tail once around your body and fix him with a gaze sharp and unyielding.Â
For once, Remus does not respond immediately. He simply studies you, and for the first time all day, the usual smirk falters.He exhales quietly, a low, resigned sound, and drags a hand across his mouth before casting a sidelong glance at the flickering fire.
âRight,â he mutters, more to himself than to you, âsheâs shifted.â
You flick your tail in acknowledgment, then resume your silent vigil, watching him as though he stands before a court of judgment.
Remus reaches for his tea and takes a slow, deliberate sip without meeting your eyes. âThis feels deserved,â he admits softly.
At first, he cannot take it seriously.Â
You, curled up in the unmistakable shape of a very unimpressed orange and white cat, seem like a temporary protest.
Heâs seen this before. When youâre annoyed, you shift into your cat formânot just as a silent protest, but as part of a well-rehearsed routine.Â
Usually, you curl up around him, all sleek fur and sharp claws, until you wear yourself out and reluctantly shift back. Itâs your way of saying, Iâm mad, but I still need your cuddles, remmy.
He knows this too well. Heâs certain youâll return to yourself once the storm inside settles. Ten minutes, he thinks, then everything will be exactly as it always is.
He turns back to his book.
But five pages later, his eyes drift upward, and there you are still perchedâears half-flattened, tail twitching with a slow, venomous rhythm, unwavering in your silent verdict.
You look deeply offended and this close to filing a formal complaint against his entire existence.
He blinks at you, then smiles, slow and fond, like he finds this ridiculous in the way one finds an angry kitten ridiculous â all teeth and noise and absolutely no threat.
âOh, dovey,â he murmurs, setting the book aside as he leans forward in his chair, a slow smile curling at the edges of his mouth.
âYouâre so cute when you try to be mad.â
His fingers reach toward you gently, expecting a reluctant purr or at least a half-hearted flick of your tail.
Instead, you hiss.
âRight,â he says slowly, pulling back like heâs just remembered you have claws. âOkay. So weâre really doing this.â
You turn your head away with all the dignity in the world, as if further conversation is beneath you. Then you hop off the arm of the chair and stalk across the common room, tail high and every step dripping with carefully performed indifference.
Remus watches you go, utterly baffled.
He blinks, then stands, his hand still tingling from where he nearly touched you.
âLove,â he calls after you, voice cautious but already softening at the edges. âAlright, alright, I may have beenâslightly unbearable today. But youâre still being dramatic, arenât you?â
You say meow nothing, of course. Instead, you leap onto the table beside the sofa, where his books lie neatly stackedâor at least they didâand with one light, deliberate flick of your paw, you send the top one sliding off the edge.
It hits the floor with a solid thump.
Remus opens his mouth. No sound comes out.
You knock another.
And another.
Then you pause, watching him.
âYou wouldnât,â he whispers.
You blink at him, once, as if to say try me.
The last book falls.
Remus exhales, somewhere between horrified and awed, and watches as you stretch lazily before padding toward the corner of the room â where his favorite sweaters are folded in a pile beside the laundry basket.
He sees your eyes narrow.
He sees your paws flex.
He knows exactly whatâs coming.
âNo, no, no, wait!â he blurts out, nearly tripping over the rug as he scrambles forward.
âPlease, please donât! Not the lambswool! That oneâs⊠itâsâwell, itâs my favorite!â
Youâre already there, tail flicking with that slow, inevitable menace, claws just barely unsheathed.
He throws up his hands in surrender. âListen, listen, Iâll do anything! Iâll buy you a lifetime supply of cat treats, Iâll give you the comfiest spot on the couch forever, just please donât shred the jumper!â
You raise one paw, slow and deliberate, sinking your claws just an inch into the collar of his softest jumper.
âOkay, okay, Iâm sorry!â he pleads, voice desperate now, eyes wide like youâre holding his wardrobe hostage.
âTruce, ceasefire, Iâm on my knees here! Just⊠please donât ruin the lambswool!â
You hold your paw there a moment longer, claws teasing the fabric, eyes locked with his like youâre daring him to breathe wrong.
You retract your claws slowly, then hop down without a sound, sauntering away as if youâre entirely above the violence you almost unleashed.
Remus lets out a soft, barely audible breath of relief and mutters something under his breath about being emotionally held hostage by someone with whiskers.
He thinks thatâs the end of it.
It is not.
Because not even thirty seconds later, youâre perched on his deskâthe very surface of his workâtail swishing lazily over stacks of notes and essays, eyes locked onto the glass bottle of ink teetering dangerously close to the edge.
âNo, Snickers, no!â he says immediately, stepping forward, voice sharpening with panic. âNo, no, no, donât even think about itââ
You think about it.
Then, with one deliberate paw and zero remorse, you bat the ink bottle clean off the desk.
It lands sideways, splattering ink in a dramatic black arc across his half-finished essay. The ink bleeds into the parchment with the slow devastation of spilled wine on white carpet.
âOh my god, Snickers!â he screams out, voice cracking slightly as he rushes to the desk, grabbing useless scraps of parchment to blot at the disaster.Â
âDo you even understand what you've just done? That was three nights of research. I footnoted.â
You turn, tail flicking, eyes gleaming with mischief.
He moves faster, reaching to catch you before you can leap off the desk.
âLove, waitâdonâtââ
But you hiss sharply, a low warning rumble vibrating from your throat, claws flashing just inches from his outstretched hand.
Remus freezes mid-reach, eyes wide.
âOkay! Okay! Iâm sorry, Snickers,â he says hurriedly, hands up like heâs defusing a bomb.Â
âNo scratches, please! Iâm on your sideâI just donât want my essay to look like a Runes class went wrong.â
He crouches at the side of the desk eyes soft and serious as he meets your unrelenting glare.
âAlright,â he begins, gentle, breath catching slightly.Â
Youâre still glaring, tail curled neatly around your paws, but he looks at you like youâre the moon dragged down to earth just to ruin him.
 âI know Iâve been insufferable today. I know. You have every reason to be angry with me. I was smug, and sarcastic, and far too pleased with myself, and instead of stopping when I saw it bothering you, I kept goingâlike a complete idiot who thinks being annoying is somehow endearing.â
He lets out a breath, eyes not leaving yours, not even for a second.
âI thought I was being clever. I thought teasing you was harmless. I thought⊠that making you flustered would make you smile eventually, because you always do. But I wasnât charming today. I was cruel without realizing it. I didnât mean to be. But I was, and I hate that.â
You blink onceâslow, regal, unreadable.
Still, he takes it as hope, and he continues.
âI shouldnât have called you dramatic. I didnât mean it in the way it sounded. I meant dramatic the way feelings areâwhen you love someone so much, everything feels bigger. You care so deeply, so fiercely, and sometimes I forget how easy it is to hurt you when youâre trying not to let it show. I made light of that, and I made you feel small, and there is nothing I regret more right now.â
Your posture doesnât change. Still tall, still elegant, still completely done with him.
But heâs already too deep to stop.
âI love you,â he says, and this time it lands like something sacred.Â
âI love you more than being right. More than whatever was in that essay. Honestly, Iâd write the entire thing againâby hand, twiceâif it meant I wouldnât have to sit here with you looking at me like that.â
He lifts one hand slowly, fingers curling slightly toward your ears.âPlease, Y/N, come back to me.â
And thatâs when the door swings open.
âOi!â Jamesâs voice hits the room like a Quaffle through a windowpane. âDoveyâs here, isnât she?â
Sirius steps in beside him with the ease of someone who expects trouble and knows exactly how to enjoy it. He surveys the wreckage â the spilled ink, the fallen books, Remus kneeling in defeat â and then clocks you on the desk perched high up, still glaring, still regal.
Sirius grins, slow and dangerous. âY/N?â
You meow, cheerfully, like nothing is wrong. Like you havenât spent the last hour hissing and orchestrating the emotional collapse of the person who loves you most.
James lights up like a bloody Christmas tree. âKnew it.â
He opens his arms without hesitation, and youâutter traitorâleap gracefully from the desk into his chest, tucking yourself into the crook of his arm with an actual, audible purr. A purr. As though you havenât spent the evening exacting revenge with the elegance of a queen and the precision of a general.
Remus watches, stunned.
Watches as you blink slowly up at James, all soft and lazy, your gaze half-lidded with practiced affection. And he knows exactly what that means in cat language.
Heâs seen you give it to him a hundred times.
Only now, youâre giving it to bloody James.
And Remus is the one glaring.
Sirius reaches out and strokes behind your ears, chuckling as you lean into it like you were born to be adored. âYouâre really working the drama today, sweetheart.â
Remus sits on the edge of his bed like a man exiled from his own kingdom, a book open in his lap and completely unread, his eyes fixed somewhere between the page and the small orange-and-white blur tangled in Siriusâs arms.
He turns a page every few minutes just to keep up appearances.
He is sulking. Completely, utterly, unapologetically sulking. From the corner of his eye, he watches as you roll across Jamesâs lap like royalty, pawing lazily at the cuff of his sleeve before hopping effortlessly into Siriusâs waiting arms.Â
Sirius accepts you with a grin, like youâve never once shredded a sock in passive-aggressive protest, murmuring praise and dragging his fingers gently behind your ears as though youâve earned every bit of affection.
You purr, loud and deliberate. Your tail curls around Siriusâs wrist like a silk ribbon drawn tight, and then comes the softest, most calculated meow heâs ever heard.
It sounds smug and pointed and designed specifically to unmake himâfull of pride, absolutely, but still so stupidly cute it makes something in his chest ache.
Itâs unfair, really, how bloody adorable you are. And all he wantsâdesperately, irrationallyâis to hold you. To bury his face in your fur and keep you close.
He flips another page.Â
Sirius traces a thumb down your spine, slow and affectionate, and Remusâwho is definitely not watching, and definitely not fumingâtightens his jaw and exhales through his nose like a man suppressing ancient fury.
And yet he says nothing, just sits there, shoulders too straight, like he is not currently being excluded from the most intimate feline cuddle session Hogwarts has ever seen.
It goes on like this for an hour.
An entire hour of tactical silence, purring treachery, and the steady sound of Remus Lupin quietly losing his mind.
James eventually falls asleep first, snoring lightly into the crook of his arm. Sirius remains where he is, his hand still lazily carding through your fur, but his eyes have gone soft and drowsy, his words slowed, fading into silence.
Youâre still curled into him, your breathing steady now, the rise and fall of your little frame barely perceptible, your tail twitching only once before it stills completely.
And then, gently, with all the quiet reverence of someone who understands how sacred youâve become in that moment, Sirius lifts you into his arms.
He stands without a word. Pads over to Remus. Pauses in front of him like itâs a peace offering.
âShe fell asleep,â Sirius murmurs. âProperly asleep. Been purring like mad, figured she might want to be with you now.â
Remus looks up. His heart twists.
Youâre nestled in Siriusâs arms like the embodiment of warmth itself, your fur soft and glowing under the flicker of firelight. Your face is tucked into your paws. You look defenseless. You look peaceful.
Sirius lowers you carefully into Remusâs arms, and something in Remus aches when you instinctively nuzzle into his chest, still half-asleep, still warm from being adored.
Sirius doesnât say anything else. Just nods and turns back toward his own bed, collapsing into it.
Remus adjusts you slightly, letting you rest against his sternum. Your small form is a ball of orange and white, impossibly soft, your breath a feather against his collarbone.
And for a long time, he just sits there.
Then, gently, he lifts a hand and gently strokes behind your ears, fingers moving barely there.
âIâm sorry, love,â he whispers.Â
âFor all of it. For being smug and stupid and talking to you like your feelings were inconvenient. For thinking I was funny when I was just being a complete git. For not noticing how close you were to snapping. You deserved better than that.â
He smooths his fingers down your spine.
âI hate that I made you feel like you had to run away from me just to be heard,â he continues, voice barely audible. âI hate that I pushed you so far you thought being a cat was the better option, and I know youâve forgiven me in the most dramatic, theatrical way possible, but just in case any part of you is still a little mad â Iâm saying it again. Iâm sorry, Snickers.â
His other hand comes up, resting carefully over your back, not holding you in place but simply resting there.
âIâll do better. Iâll listen. Iâll stop trying to be right all the time. And Iâll never â never â say youâre dramatic again. You are... overwhelming, yes. Important things always are. You take up space in my life that I never want to give back, and I adore you for it.â
He exhales, his thumb stroking softly over the spot between your ears.
âI love you,â he says again, and this time it lands like truth. Quiet, warm, real.
For a moment, nothing changes. You stay curled, still pressed beneath his chin, your breathing slow, deep.
And then you open your eyes.
Golden and gleaming and terribly alive, you lift your head just slightly and look up at him, your yellow cat eyes meeting his, unblinking for one long beat â and then, slowly, with that feline elegance that says everything words never could, you blink. Once. Twice. Long and deliberate.
He lets out a quiet, disbelieving laugh, soft with relief and disbelief all at once.
âOh, love,â he murmurs, a smile tugging at his lips. âIf youâre going to turn into a cat every time we argue, the least you could do is let me pet you.â
You narrow your eyes instantly. Then, without moving from his arms, you unsheathe your claws by a fraction and tap them meaningfully against the fabric of his jumper.
He Laughs again. âAlright, alright. Sorry, message received.â
Satisfied, you curl tighter against him, nose tucked into the curve of his neck, your breathing steady, your purr deep and content.
Remus doesnât move at first. He simply holds you, cradling your small form like something rare and impossibly fragile, his fingers resting protectively along your spine, as though even a breath too sudden might break the spell and scatter you into smoke.
In that moment, his heart feels impossibly fullâso heavy with love that it almost aches. Heâs never been happier, never more certain that you are everything he wants to hold onto, everything worth fighting for.
And thenâseamlesslyâyou shift.
A quiet exhale, a shimmer of magic against his chest, and youâre back. Warm and real and unmistakably you, curled in his lap with your cheek still pressed to the hollow of his throat, your breath soft against his skin like nothing has changed at all.
âHi, love,â he breathes, voice warm and stunned.
âHi, Remmy,â you whisper, eyes barely open, voice thick with sleep.
âHi,â he says again, a little breathless this time, like he still canât believe youâre real.
You nuzzle closer, arms looping around his waist, body curling instinctively toward his warmth.
âAm I forgiven?â he asks, his voice barely above a whisper, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek, gentle and uncertain.
âIâll do anything you want.â
But inside, something curls tight and trembling in his chest, a quiet dread laced with all the things heâs too afraid to name. He waits, not daring to speak or move, because he doesnât know what youâll ask for next â and it terrifies him, in a way nothing else ever has.
Not because he doubts you, but because he doubts himself. Because if you ask for something he canât give, if your forgiveness slips, even for a second, through the cracks in his hands, he knows heâll fall apart trying to reach for it.
He is not built for losing you.
Not to James, not to time, not to silence, not even to one of your moody afternoons when you ignore him for an hour just to prove a point. Even then, even in those small, petty standoffs, his mind races.
Because the truth, the horrible, unspoken truth, is that Remus doesnât know how to exist in a world where you are distant.
Heâs smug and sarcastic and impossible, the king of casual remarks and maddening glances. But all of it, every last bit of it, is just a flimsy curtain he hides behind â a way to mask the simple, aching fact that heâs yours.
Utterly and pathetically yours.
Even when you're mad. Even when you're claws and narrowed eyes and sharp little hisses of warning, especially then. Because beneath every hiss is a heart that hasnât stopped choosing him, not once.
And gods, he loves you for it.
Heâs a bastard, sure. But heâs your bastard. And the thought of not beingâof you turning your gaze elsewhere, of that soft affection in your voice belonging to someone else, even for a heartbeatâundoes him.
And even if you donât say it, even if all you do is blink at him with tired indifference â heâll still be here.
Because no matter what, Remus cannot stop loving you.Â
Your voice breaks through the haze of his thoughts, quiet and half-lost in the fabric of his jumper.
âAnything?â you hum, soft and slow, the syllables slurring slightly with sleep.
His smile wavers, flickering with tentative relief. âAnything, dovey.â
You fall silent for a moment, resting against him like youâve never left, because in his heart, you never really did. Then, softly and sincerely, free of any trace of your earlier fire, you murmurâ
âCan you make a spell that turns me into a toast?â
Remus stills. âIâm sorryâwhat?â
You nod, eyes closed. âI wanna be a toast.â
Thereâs a beat of stunned silence as he looks down at you, utterly baffled.
âIâwhy wouldâlove, why would you want to be a toast?â
You sigh, sleepy and serious. âYou looked so happy eating it this morning.â
Remus stares at you for a long, silent moment, torn between concern and complete adoration.
Then he lets out a soft laugh, presses a kiss to your temple, and whispers, âAlright. Iâll see what I can do.â
summary: in which you, a chaotic orange cat animagus known as snickers, unleash midnight zoomies on the gryffindor dorm, dragging padfoot into absolute mayhem and wrecking everything in sight.
a/n: this tiktok is literally snickers and padfoot wth?? masterlist
Remus was particularly accustomed to the chaos that punctuated his life at Hogwartsâthe unruly Marauders, the unpredictable phases of the moon, and the relentless demands of both magic and mortality.
Yet, nothing in his experience â no amount of weariness or forewarning â had prepared him for the spectacle that awaited behind the worn door of the Gryffindor dormitory after a long, grueling night of study.
The moment the door1 creaked open, an uproarious cacophony assaulted his senses.
Books and parchment littered the floor like casualties of a minor explosion. A startled owl screeched and flapped against the far wall, desperate to escape the pandemonium.
Amid the wreckage, two figures blazed with frenetic energy: Snickers, the fiery orange blur of a cat animagus possessed by the most intense zoomies anyone had ever witnessed, and Padfoot, a dark shadow of equal parts menace and mirth, darting and bounding with predatory zeal.
James sat perched atop the dresser, arms folded, laughter bubbling from his lips as if he were witnessing the most entertaining spectacle in years.
âRemus! You missed the highlight reelâSnickers just launched herself off the bed and knocked over the whole lampstand. Padfootâs been chasing her tail for the past five minutes.â
Snickers skidded across the floor, knocking a stack of books into the air. One fluttered down to land on Jamesâs head, eliciting a dramatic groan.
Without pause, you streaked between Remusâs legs and shot upward like a comet, claws scrabbling at the ceiling tapestry.
Padfoot was instantly on your tail, teeth bared in a playful snarl.
âJames, why arenât you breaking this up?â Remus demanded, trying to keep his voice steady over the uproar.
James shrugged, grinning unabashedly. âAnd ruin the fun? No way.â
A low growl sounded from the corner, and you responded with a triumphant yowl as you vaulted toward a precarious stack of quills.
Padfoot intercepted you mid-air, sending both of you crashing into a pile of scattered robes. The ensuing tumble sent Remus staggering backward, narrowly avoiding a flying textbook.
He closed his eyes for a fraction of a second, breath hitching. âI justâafter todayâs exam, I was hoping for some peace.
âPeace died the moment Snickers remembered sheâs a cat with a rocket strapped to her back,â James said with a wink. âSeriously, moony, I think sheâs been holding all this energy in since the last full moon.â
Snickers (you) exploded into another frenzy, darting from wall to wall, a streak of orange lightning barely visible in the dim light.
Padfoot yipped and leapt after you, knocking into the dresser and sending a cascade of socks raining down like confetti.
Remus didnât even make it fully to the chair.
Heâd aimed for itâhonestly, he hadâbut between the pile of exploded parchment, the mangled remains of what he hoped was just a textbook, and the streak of orange that rocketed under his feet, he never stood a chance.
One foot slipped, the other tangled in a sock, and suddenly he was flat on his back, blinking up at the canopy.
You zipped past his head, your claws skidding dramatically against the wood floor, tail puffed up like a bottlebrush, pupils blown wide with ecstasy.
âI will hex both of you!â Remus snapped, pointing furiously at you as you vaulted off Jamesâs trunk, ricocheted onto Padfootâs back mid-run, and used him like a trampoline, vanishing under the bed in a blaze of orange rage.
Padfoot howled and spun in three tight circles, eyes wild.
âDonât you dareââ Remus warned, finger still raised.
Too late. Padfoot launched after you with the reckless momentuml, disappearing under the bed with a guttural growl and a flurry of socks.
âPadfoot, get out from under there! And youââ he pointed to the bed frame, where the tip of your tail flicked defiantly out from beneath.
âCome out before I charm your paws to the floor!â
Another crash answered him from beneath the bed.
âWHAT are you doing?â Remus shouted from the floor, voice cracked and betrayed.
James was doubled over on his bed, face purple with laughter, tears streaming down his cheeks. âYou just got demolished, Moonyâby a ten-pound feline!â
Padfoot reemerged with your tail in his mouth. You were yowling furiously, limbs flailing like a spaghetti demon, fur puffed in seven directions.
âLet her go, you maniacâ!â Remus scrambled up, just in time for Padfoot to tear through the room in a victory lap, dragging you along the floor like some kind of orange war banner.
James was now on the floor, laughing so hard he wheezed, slapping the stone tiles.
Remus sighed, ducking as a pillow launched itself from the bed and exploded into a storm of feathers.
You broke free with an acrobatic twist, rebounded off the wall, and scaled Jamesâs curtains.
From the top of the bedpost, you looked down with imperial menace, panting, fur standing on end.
Padfoot barked again and lunged up after you, but missed and headbutted the wardrobe.
There was a long silence.
Then a crash.
Then the wardrobe tipped sideways and slammed into the floor.
Padfoot didnât pause to assess the wreckage. The wardrobe had barely finished slamming to the floor when he snarledâlow and gutturalâand launched himself at you.
You barely had time to adjust your footing on the bedpost before he collided with the frame below, sending the whole canopy rattling.
He jumped again, this time with intent, claws scrabbling, teeth flashing.
His weight rocked the structure, and before you could leap away, he caught your leg in his mouth.
âPADFOOTâ!â Remusâs voice cracked like a whip, sharp with panic. He was already on his feet, wand half-raised, eyes wide. âLet go! What are you doing?!â
You twisted in his grip, yowling in protest, your ears flattened, body writhing like liquid fury. He didnât release and so you raked your claws across his snout with a hiss.
Padfoot reeled back with a yelp, fur bristling, blood blooming where your claws had connected.
And thenâshiftâhe was Sirius again, all limbs and wild black hair.
âYou psychopath!â he barked, staggering backward and rubbing at the scratch on his nose. âYou clawed me across the face!â
âYou tackled her!â Remus shot back, storming forward now, eyes flicking between the two of you, trying to determine if he needed to physically intervene. âSheâs half your size, Siriusâwhat the hell was that?!â
âShe bit me first!â Sirius shouted. âAnd look at her!â
You were still vibrating at the top of the bedpost, fur puffed, eyes blazing, tail whipping side to side like a live fuse.
âSheâs got demon energy! Thatâs not a cat!.â
And then you moved.
You leapt off the post in a blinding flash of orange and took off across the room like your tail was on fire, skidding across a pile of quills, then rebounding off a chair.
âOh, hell noââ Sirius dove after you, crawling under the bed, swearing violently. âCome back here, you absolute gremlinââ
Remus reached out a hand to stop him but missed. James was back to wheezing on the floor.
âThis is better than the Gryffindor vs Slytherin match,â he gasped.
You darted out from beneath the bed just as Sirius lunged again, sending both of you toppling into the curtains. The fabric ripped, Sirius cursed as yoy tore out of the mess and leapt onto his back.
âOWâbloody hellâsheâs on me againâRemus! Help!â
But Remus didnât move.
Yiu shifted mid-pounce, landing on Siriusâs back in human form, knocking the wind out of him as he crashed forward with a grunt.
âWhat theâ?!â He tried to turn over, arms flailing, but you hooked an arm around his neck and pulled him down again.
âNot so fast, mutt,â you growled, grinning into his ear.
âOh, now youâve done itââ Sirius flipped under you, wrestling playfully, his hands grabbing at your waist as he tried to flip you back. âYou think you can scratch me and tackle me?â
âYes, I can!â you shot back, elbowing his ribs.
âGods, youâre feral,â he wheezed.
âYou attacked me!â
âYou attacked me first!â
âYou bit my tail!â
Remus groaned, rubbing both hands over his face. âCan we please go one night without bloodshed?â
You rolled off him, flopping back on the floor, hair a mess, breath heaving. Sirius followed, lying beside you, shoulder brushing yours.
Then, suddenly, Sirius scrambled to his feet with dramatic flair and sprinted across the room.
âMoony!â he wailed, arms outstretched like a tragic widow. âYour girlfriend is so mean to me!â
Remus barely had time to react before Sirius flung himself forward and latched onto him like a lifeline. âShe scratched me! She bit me!â
âYou dragged me across the floor by my tail!â you barked from the other side of the room, indignant, hair wild, one sock still stuck to your elbow.
âWhat was I supposed to do? Purr?!â
Remus, to his credit, didnât flinch. He stood there with Sirius clinging to him like a particularly dramatic scarf and let out a long, exhausted sigh.
You gaped. âIâm rabid?! Youâre the one who went full wolf-on-steroidsâRemus, tell him heâs wrong! Tell him Iâm not rabid.â
Remus looked between the two of you, the absolute carnage of the dorm, his slashed-up bag in the corner, and said, âI think Iâd like to transfer schools.â
James snorted into the pillow he was using to hide his laughter.
Sirius groaned dramatically. âJust hold me while she reloads.â
âOh my godââ You stomped across the room, snatched Sirius by the collar, and yanked him off Remus with zero effort. âThatâs my boyfriend, thank you.â
Remuss finally let the corner of his mouth lift, soft and a little stunned, like he couldnât believe the storm had finally passed. âDo I get a say in any of this, orâŠ?â
âNo!â you and Sirius said in unison.
Then you laughed. Loud and unfiltered and stupidly happy. And Sirius was laughing too, leaning against your shoulder now, his bruised ribs forgotten.
And somehow, even surrounded by feathers, overturned furniture, and two emotionally unstable friends arguing over rights, everything felt exactly right.
synopsis: professor lupinâs applied statistics class should have been easy, but it never was. for their final project, the golden trio tests whether looks affect dating choices, using remus as their secret subject. you, unknowingly drawn into their experiment, end up skewing the data, and his heart too.
a/n: this was inspired by a lovely levi fic i read a while ago. credits to the fic plot goes to anxi_aashi on ao3!! <3
âRon, I know Professor Lupin said we could choose any topic we liked,â Hermione said, voice taut with disbelief, âbut surely you donât mean this.â
Ron looked up from the stack of papers spread across their table in the library, eyes gleaming with the kind of reckless enthusiasm that immediately made Hermione nervous.
âWhat?â he whisperedâloudly enough to earn a glare from someone two tables away. âItâs a solid idea! Creative and educational.â
âCatastrophic,â she corrected.
Across from them, Harry stifled a laugh, though his grin betrayed him. âYou canât honestly be doing a study about whether people fancy Lupin or not.â
Ronâs brows shot up. âI never said Lupin! You said Lupin!â he hissed, glancing around as if the professor himself might materialize beside them them. âIâm keeping it anonymous. Thatâs the whole point of research ethics, Hermione. Havenât you read the guidelines?â
Hermioneâs sigh could have curdled the foam on her drink. âYou have a list of interview questions that literally describe him to the letter. âMild-mannered, prematurely greying, quiet butâââ she squinted at the parchment, ââdeceptively fitâ? Ronald!â
Harry snorted into his coffee mug.
Ron went red but kept his chin high. âLook, itâs a serious question! Lupinâs a decent-looking bloke, right? But heâs not flashy like Lockhart was, and people adored Lockhart. I just want to test whether looks actually matter when it comes to who people fancy. For science.â
âScience,â Hermione repeated flatly. âYouâre going to get expelled for science.â
The library was unusually full that eveningâstudents packed into every table, laptops humming and coffee cups balanced precariously beside open textbooks as everyone tried to finish their end-of-term projects before exams swallowed them whole.
Ronâs pile of notes, however, was distinctly more chaotic than most. Empty coffee cups surrounded his laptop like trophies of bad decisions, and someoneâs doodle of a wolf stretched across the corner of his summary page.
Applied Statistics was meant to be the easy option. Lupin had a reputation for being gentle, patient, the kind of professor who cared more about understanding than perfection.Â
It was supposed to be a quiet way to end their academic careers on a calm note. But then heâd assigned a final research project: design your own study, collect real data, and present your conclusions. The only rule was that the topic had to be appropriate for class.
Hermione had immediately started drafting a comparative analysis on probability and study efficiency between morning and night classes.Â
Harry was working on something about reaction times in competitive sports, using his old Hockey instincts as inspiration.Â
Ronâafter three hours of staring at a blank document and two iced coffees laterâhad landed on human attraction. Specifically, whether someoneâs appearance could statistically predict how likely they were to be asked on a date.
And in what could only be described as divine misfortune, heâd chosen his mild-mannered, unreasonably charming professor as his âmodel subject.â
âI still canât believe you roped me into this,â Hermione muttered.
âI didnât rope you in!â Ron protested. âI just need you to help me make sure my sample size isnât biased.â
âYour sample size is going to be detention if Lupin finds out,â Harry said, grinning.Â
Ron shrugged, though the tips of his ears betrayed his nerves. âHeâll never know. Iâm not putting his name anywhere, and Iâll make sure no one says it out loud.â
Hermione gave him a long, withering look before scanning his notes again. âYou literally describe him as âthe soft-spoken man with kind eyes, questionable jumpers, and a habit of vanishing for a week every month due to a mysterious illness.â Who else could that possibly be?â
Ron grinned despite himself. âItâs anonymous if I say it is.â
He sat at a corner table, clutching his notepad like a shield, eyes flicking past rows of students lost in their screens. âAll I need is one person to answer a few questions. Someone normal. Someone who wonât laugh in my face.â
Harry leaned back in his chair, looking far too amused for Ronâs liking. âYouâve been saying that for twenty minutes,â he said. âJust pick someone already. Itâs not a marriage proposal.â
Ron ignored him, scanning againâand then his eyes stopped.Â
A few tables over, you sat hunched over your laptop, earbuds in, an empty coffee cup balanced precariously on a stack of notes. You looked tired in the soft, lived-in way of someone whoâd been working too long, your screen glaring white against your face.
âThat one,â Ron said suddenly, jerking his chin in your direction. âSheâs not typing anymore. Perfect.â
Harry followed his gaze, smirking. âLooks like sheâs about to call it a day. Go on, mate. Before she escapes.â
Hermione sighed, already closing her laptop. âIf theyâre busy, theyâll tell you,â she said, voice threaded with resignation.
Ron took a deep breath, straightened his posture, and picked up his notebook. âAlright. Science waits for no man.â
âEspecially not for you,â Harry murmured under his breath, earning a sharp kick under the table.
Together, they made their way across the library, Ron clutching his clipboard like a life raft. You noticed them only when the shadow of their approach reached your table.
âUhâhi,â Ron began, his voice slightly too loud for the setting. You pulled out your earbuds, blinking up at him. âSorry to bother you. Iâm doing a project for my Applied Statistics class, and I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions? It wonât take long, I promise.â
You studied him for a secondâthe nervous energy, the notebook, the faint red creeping up his neckâand decided you didnât have the heart to say no.
Your motivation for work had long evaporated anyway. âSure,â you said, leaning back in your chair. âGo ahead.â
Relief flickered across Ronâs face as he clicked his pen. âBrilliant. First questionâdo you identify as someone whoâs romantically attracted to men?â
You frowned, caught off guard. âUh⊠yes?â
âRight. And sexually attracted?â
You tilted your head with a grimace. âI think Iâm a little old for you.â
His face went crimson. âNo, noâbloody hell, not like that!â
Harry coughed behind him to smother a laugh.
You chuckled, amused by his mortification. âThen yes, I am.â
âGreat,â Ron said quickly, desperate to move on. âOkay, so Iâm going to describe a, uh, theoretical man to you, and you just tell me whether youâd go on a date with him, based on what I say. Alright?â
âSure.â
He glanced at his notes, cleared his throat, and began reading. âOkay, so⊠heâs a bit reserved. Dresses like he owns only jumpers and sweaters, all in different shades of brown. Kind smile, good sense of humor, can be awkward when complimented, and occasionally vanishes for a week every month because ofâerâsome chronic condition. Totally normal. Nothing suspicious about that.â
You raised an eyebrow. âThatâs⊠oddly specific.â
Harry coughed again, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like âtextbook Lupinâ.
Ron glared at him before looking back at you. âOut of the following answer choices, what would be your answer if this man asked you on a date: definite no, no, maybe, I guess, yes, or definite yes?â He looked up at you, pencil poised, clearly waiting for an answer.
You pretended to consider it, eyes narrowing thoughtfully. âHe sounds decent. Iâd say yes.â
Ron froze mid-scribble. âYes as in yes, or yes as in maybe?â
âYes as in yes.â
He continued to look at you like youâd grown a third head until Hermione cleared her throat, reminding Ron to keep going.
He snapped out of it and took a begrudging breath, reaching for the picture paperclipped to his question sheet.
âOkay, hypothetical follow-up. If this man looked like thisââ
You leaned forward, and your breath caught in a laugh. The photo was clearly taken from somewhere it shouldnât have been:Â what appeared to be some Professor mid-lecture, smiling faintly, sunlight streaking through the classroom blinds behind him. The image quality was terrible, but somehow, that only made it look better.
 ââwould your answer to the previous question change?â
You studied the picture again, amused by the sheer audacity of it all. âWell, in that case, Iâm changing my answer. Thatâs a definite yes.â
Ron looked utterly baffled. âYouâd actuallyâwhy?â
You smiled faintly. âI have a weakness for guys who seem quiet and kind, a little awkward but in a charming way⊠and he has some really, really pretty eyes.â
Ron blinked at you, clearly tryingâand failingâto see the appeal. âRight. Fair enough. Dataâs data.â
âGlad to help, researcher,â you teased.
He scribbled something down in his notebook with the seriousness of someone logging a scientific breakthrough. âThank you for your time.â
As you packed up your things and left the library, you didnât notice him still watching the door long after youâd gone. Nor could he have known that your nameâjust one of dozens written on that clipboardâwould be the one that refused to fade.
***
Remus could tell almost immediately that the project was about him.
The moment Ron began his presentation, Remus recognized the uncomfortable familiarity in the data, the phrasing, andâMerlin help himâthe word choices.Â
His first instinct was to be mildly horrified, followed closely by the urge to deduct twenty points on principle. But as the presentation went on, his irritation gave way to reluctant curiosity.
The truth was, it wasnât a bad project. In fact, it was rather well designedâshockingly so, considering it came from Ron Weasley, who once turned in a probability worksheet with âwinging itâ written in the margin.Â
And while Remus wanted to be offended that his own students had used him as their unwitting test subject, he wasnât about to become the sort of professor who graded out of bruised ego. So, he sat there, listening as the class analyzed his mannerisms, his âpolite smile,â and the âhot scars all over his bodyâ that apparently made him statistically attractive.
Ron, to his credit, was thorough. He explained his hypothesis, the methodology, the sample groups, and the confidence intervals... Remus even found himself smiling, until he skimmed over one particular detail that made his brows knit together.
When Ron wrapped up, Remus lifted a hand. The room fell quiet. Ron swallowed, clearly expecting to be scolded.
âMr. Weasley,â Remus said, tone mild, âcould you elaborate on the outlier you mentioned?â
Ron blinked. âOhâright, yeah. There was one participant whose responses didnât fit the pattern, so I had to exclude them from the analysis. Everyone else rated the subjectâs attractiveness after seeing the picture, but this person said theyâd go on a date with him before seeing anything. Highest pre-photo score by far.â
Remus tilted his head, feigning scholarly interest, though a faint heat crept up his neck.
He felt a little guilty for being so interested in this outlier, but while he wanted to pretend he was perfectly happy being single, he had to admit, it was kind of nice knowing someone found him attractive on something other than the physical level.Â
 âI see. And⊠did they say why?â
Ron flipped through his notes. âUm⊠something about having a thing for people who seem a little awkward but in a charming way⊠and they specifically wrote, âHe has really, really pretty eyes.ââ
For a long moment, Remus said nothing. The class waited. Then, to everyoneâs surprise, he chuckledâlow and quiet, the sound carrying a hint of embarrassment and something warmer beneath it.
âWell,â he said, closing his notebook with deliberate calm. âStatistically speaking, Mr. Weasley, I suppose everyoneâs bound to be someoneâs outlier.â
The class laughed. Ron looked like he might faint with relief. And as Remus moved on to the next presentation, he couldnât quite stop himself from wondering who, exactly, that particular outlier had been.
As curious as he had been in that instant, by the end of the day, the week, and even the month, Remus had completely forgotten about the random outlier from Ronâs project.
Remus had queued for a coffee he didnât particularly want, clutching his satchel in one hand and trying to ignore the headache forming just behind his eyes.
You stood in front of him in line, scrolling through your phone with the kind of absent concentration that made him smile despite himself.
When you reached the counter, you ordered the exact same drink as himâdown to the dash of cinnamonâand turned around at the sound of his quiet laugh.
âSorry,â he said quickly, the corners of his mouth twitching in apology. âItâs justâyouâve got impeccable taste.â
You blinked, caught off guard by his Welsh accent yet deep voice. The man before you was tall, soft-looking despite the tired eyes and slightly threadbare jumper.
You blinked. Something about him tugged at your brain. You knew that face. Or at leastâyou felt like you did.
âThank you,â you replied, smiling. âItâs my go-to. Canât survive the day without it.â
He nodded, and before you could pull out your card, the barista had already rung up two drinks.Â
Remus cleared his throat softly. âIâll get both,â he said, tone polite but firm in that way professors have when theyâve made up their mind.
âOhâyou donât have toââ
âPlease,â he said, voice calm, a little low. âItâs easier than splitting the bill for identical drinks.â
You huffed a small laugh. âYou really didnât have to, but thank you.â
The two of you stepped aside to wait for your drinks. You glanced at him again, trying not to be obvious about itâbut you were sure now.Â
It felt like it was right at the front of your mind. You knew you knew him, you were sure of it. You just didnât know how. Which was weird, because you were pretty sure you wouldâve remembered meeting someone as handsome as him.
âSorry,â you said at last, turning toward him. âI know this is weird, but⊠have we met before?â
He looked mildly startled, brow creasing. âI donât think so,â he said slowly.
You squinted at him. âWere you ever, like⊠in a commercial? Or maybe a university brochure?â
That earned a soft, weary laugh. âNo. Iâm a Professor. Iâm fairly certain no one wants my face on their advertising.â
Your head tilted. âA Professor?â
He hesitated, clearly wary of where this was going. âYes. Statistics, actually.â
It hit you like a lightbulb moment. Your eyes went wide, and the realization burst out before you could stop it. âOh my god. Youâre real!â
His brows rose in quiet confusion. âIâpardon?â
You covered your mouth, half laughing, half mortified. âNo, sorry, that sounds insane. But there was this studentâhe came up to me weeks ago asking questions for a statistics project about attraction. He showed me a picture of some guy, and I thought it was, like, a stock photo or something. But it was you, wasnât it?â
He blinked, then rubbed a hand over his face with a sigh that was equal parts tired and amused. âRed hair, bit of an attitude, usually trolls around with two others?â
âExactly!â you said, snapping your fingers.
âRight,â he muttered, shaking his head with a wry smile. âThat would be Weasley.â
You groaned, covering your face with one hand. âThat kid didnât tell me it was an actual person! I said yes both timesâbefore and after the photoâand now this is justâmortifying.â
Remus chuckled, a warm, low sound that made your stomach flip. âMortifying? Iâd say flattering.â
You peeked through your fingers at him. âYouâre not serious.â
âOh, I am,â he said, his smile soft but teasing. âStatistically speaking, itâs incredibly rare to meet oneâs outlier twice.â
The barista called your names, breaking the moment. You both reached for your cups, fingers brushing briefly over the cardboard sleeve. The contact sent a tiny spark of something electric up your arm.
Remus hesitated for a moment, thenâalmost shylyâadded, âSince you were kind enough to answer that study, perhaps youâll let me ask a follow-up question?â
Request: "Remus is being rude to the reader due to the upcoming full moon.. make it as angsty as you can"
Thanks for requesting babe <3
cw: migraine, Rem is mean :(
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ⥠1.2k words
When you come home from work, the apartment is dark and thereâs evidence of Remusâ shit day everywhere.Â
The curtains are drawn closed against the sunlight, and thereâs a discarded blanket on the couch and several snack containers half-emptied on the coffee table. One of them has tipped onto the floor, a mess of crisps your boyfriend was likely feeling too unwell to tidy. Heâs spilled tea on the table, too. These kinds of things are more common in the days before the full moon, but you think he must really be having a rough one. Even a few unwashed dishes in the sink is usually enough to stress Remus out, so he has to have been in a state to leave things like this.Â
You brew a fresh cup of tea, grabbing some chocolates from the cabinet in case he didnât bring any with him, and broach the bedroom. A shape moves under the sheets when the door creaks open.Â
âHi,â you say softly. You kneel by the bed, lightly touching the ends of Remusâ hair. âHow are you, love?âÂ
âBad,â he mutters from beneath the covers. You wince. He must be, if he wonât even lower the sheets beneath his eyes.Â
You do your best to keep the pity from your voice, knowing heâd hate it. âI brought you some tea,â you murmur, âif you want it.â
âCanât right now.âÂ
âItâs chamomile,â you coax. âIt might helpââ
âI canât.â The low rumble of his voice takes on a hard edge, and you fall instantly silent. You nod even though he canât see it, setting the tea and chocolate on his nightstand as quietly as you can.Â
You donât tell him youâre going, sure every footstep is agonizingly loud for him. You force down the lump in your throat. Remus is miserable right now; heâs not thinking about how his tone affects you, and thatâs not his fault. He doesnât mean anything by it. You can deal with it, help anyways.
You sweep instead of vacuuming, gathering the little bits of crisps into a dustpan and dumping them in the trash. The half-eaten snacks get reshelved in your cabinets, the puddle of tea cleaned off the coffee table, and candles lit to banish the stale smell in the living room. The cinnamon ones are usually Remusâ favorite, but you trade them out for lavender on the off chance it helps with his headache. Youâre washing dishes one at a time so they donât clatter when the bedroom door creaks open.Â
âHey,â you say, relieved. âFeeling better?âÂ
âNo.â Remusâ voice is low, and the scratch of it tears at your heartstrings. He trudges to the end of the hall, where he stops, rubbing his forehead with his thumb and forefinger. âI need you to be quiet.âÂ
âOh, sorry.â You soften your voice, freezing with your hands submerged in the warm dishwater. âIâve been trying, I didnât realize you could hear. Iâm almost done with this, soââÂ
âCould you stop?â he asks, tone going harsh again. âJust, be quiet or find somewhere else to be, please. I canât deal with this.âÂ
You swallow against the intrusion in your throat. Will away the heat from your face. âOkay,â you say, the word barely a whisper.Â
Remus turns, plodding back to the bedroom. You hear the door shut.
You leave the dishwater to get cold rather than pouring it out and making more noise. You sit down on the couch with a book, eyes skimming over the words as you convince yourself over and over that itâd be stupid to cry about this. Your face heats, then cools. Tears blur your vision and you blink them away. This is ridiculous. Remus is just moody, he didnât mean it. You know better than to take anything he says to heart right now. You canât expect your efforts to be properly appreciated, but the important part is to keep making them. When heâs feeling better, heâll thank you in a million sweet ways, because thatâs who he is. He loves you. He didnât mean it.Â
Itâs dark outside when the bedroom door creaks open again. You hadnât noticed night falling, even when the light became too dim for you to make out the words on your page. You set your book down; you hadnât been reading anyway.Â
Remus sits next to you without a word. He leans the side of his head against the cushion with a sigh.Â
âDove?â he murmurs.Â
You donât dare do more than hum in response.Â
A scarred hand finds your leg, the thumb sweeping back and forth over your skin. âIâm sorry for snapping at you,â he says quietly. âThat wasâŠit was really mean. And undeserved.â
âIâm sorry I was being loud,â you reply, and you canât help it, your throat clogs all over again. âI was just trying to help.âÂ
Your voice catches on the last word, and Remus makes a pained sound that has you silencing yourself instantly. He makes another at your response.Â
âFuck, Iâm so sorry,â he rasps. âDo you want a hug?âÂ
You bite down on your lower lip. âAre you okay to hug?âÂ
âYeah, sweetheart.âÂ
He meets you in the middle, pressing upon your shoulder blades like he can hold you together by sheer physical force. You try for his sake, swallowing the cries that rise in your throat.Â
âIâm sorry,â he says again, palm marking a slow path up and down your back. âYou werenât too loud, Iâm just fussy. You were only being your kind self. I had no reason to be so horrid.âÂ
âYou werenât horrid,â you warble. âI know youâre having a hard time.âÂ
âThatâs no excuse.â His palm makes its way back to your shoulders just in time to feel the first little sob escape you. Remusâ grip tightens. âAw, dovey. Iâm so, so sorry. I canât believe I spoke to you like that.âÂ
âItâs okay.âÂ
âItâs not,â he murmurs, kissing the exposed bit of skin where your shirt is slipping down your shoulder. âItâs not, andââ He pauses, looking around the room for the first time. âDid you clean?âÂ
You nod against his front, feeling the pained sigh that leaves him.Â
âFuck, Iâm awful.âÂ
âYouâre not.âÂ
âYou were cleaning up my mess, and I yelled at you.â Now Remusâ voice sounds a tad raw too. He gathers you closer, stubble scratching your forehead as he kisses your hairline. âMy sweet girl. You should have ripped me a new one.âÂ
âYou werenât yelling,â you point out, teasing a bit now, âand anyway, it seemed like you were already being ripped a new one.âÂ
âStill,â he mumbles into your hair. âYou lit the lavender candles and everything. You deserve to put me through hell.âÂ
âYouâre already going through hell,â you remind him gently, brushing a kiss against his cheek. âI donât need to help the process along. Do you want some tea, love?âÂ
Remus hums. âI do, but let me get it. Let me get some for you, too, yeah?â He leans back to look down at you. âYou want some nighttime tea, darling?âÂ
Youâre alright really, but you tell him you do anyway. He looks nearly happy as he drags himself into the kitchen, and he wonât stop mollycoddling you for the rest of the night.Â
Summary: Sirius and James have a secret. They love watching Remus fucking his girlfriend, you. Without both of you knowing.
Warning: SMUT SMUT SMUT, Remus is a gentleman in the streets but a freak in the sheets, rough sex, masturbating, everyone is of age!!
Word Count: 1.6K
It all started when Sirius and James ran down the hallway to their dorm room. They were running late to quidditch practice, they didnât want to get an earful about their tardiness. James was captain which meant more pressure in attending practice on time. Barging into the room, they quickly grabbed their stuff and was about to head out when a voice called out, a girlâs voice. They froze in mid step when they heard giggling followed by the sound of Remusâ voice, âNeed you so bad, love.â
Even though they were running late, they were pranksters after all. They didnât want to waste a good moment like this to prank their dear friend and his girl. They've been waiting for an opportunity like this. They were fond of you and accepted you into their little friendâs group. Sirius and James wouldnât tell Remus this, but they had a small crush on you when they first met you. Which ended when Remus and you came out as a couple but once in a while, James and Siriusâ gaze would linger a little bit too long on you whenever you spoke or when doing something.
Running into the bathroom to hide, they left the door ajar. They had a clear view of Remus' bed. They held their breath when they heard the knob of the door jiggling.
âRemus.â Siriusâ ears perked up at your voice as both of you came walking in.
Sirius sees Remus leaning down to kiss you. Remusâ hands cups your face as he makes out with you. The boys freeze when they witness the sight of tenderness between Remus and you. Remus is mumbling your nickname to you as he lays his forehead against yours. His lips meets yours again before pulling away to lay you down on his bed, youâre on your back.
About to jump out and scare both of you.
You began to moan when Remus started to nip on your neck, planting wet open kisses.
It takes a lot to make playboy, Sirius blush like a school girl but seeing Remus kiss you like that flipped something in him. Remusâ fingers were working quickly to unbutton your shirt. James gulped when Remus took your shirt off, showing your bralette.
âPrettiest fucking tits, I swear.â Remus says as he pulls them down, showing your bare breasts.
Sirius and Jamesâ eyes grew wide as they saw Remus sucked your nipple while squeezing the other. They were practically salivating when they saw your wet hard nipple when Remus pops it out of his mouth.
âDonât forget to lock the door.â You tell him as Remus quickly removes his sweater and throws it across the room.
âDonât worry. Peter is in the library with Lily. James and Sirius are at practice. They wonât be back until a few hours.â Sirius and James glance at each at the word practice.
Practice will not be on the agenda today that was for sure especially when they saw you removing the rest of your clothes. Remus follows you and it is not the first time they have seen Remus naked. All the years they have helped him with his transformations. They were always amazed by his body. His tall frame was something out of a painting. His fair skin looked so soft even with the scars. His hair was getting longer, and his piercing eyes peeked behind the strands of hair as he leans over you.
Their cocks grew hard when they saw you riding Remus. The sound of skin slapping together, your wet cunt and Remus groans were so arousing to them. Your breasts were bouncing up and down as you rode Remusâ cock. James rubs the back of his neck as he hears Remus calling you his pretty slut. Sirius starts to play with the belt around his waist when you cried out that you were going cum.
Remus brings his hand to your neck and Sirius is hard when he sees you, go crossed eyes for a sec and a grin appears on your pretty flushed face when you cum on Remusâ cock.
Itâs been three weeks since James and Sirius saw Remus fucking you. After watching Remus and you, they had to go their separate ways and deal with themselves. They felt bad afterwards, the guilt was eating them up every day. Jacking off to the thought of their best mate fucking his girlfriend.
They vowed to never tell Remus or you about this. Not even a living soul, they couldnât tell anyone that they enjoyed it. Remus and you had ruined porn for them completely, nothing was exciting them like before. They had to hear Remus and your moans. They had to see your cunt gushing all over Remusâ cock to cum. It had gotten to the point that Sirius and James would pretend to forget some details. The boys would ârecallâ how your ass looked or how Remusâ cock slid into you. They wanted to talk about you and Remus in order for them to cum.
âRemember that face she made?â James nods at Sirius.
âWhen he started to choke her..fuck.â Sirius says as he cups himself through his trousers.
Remus and you never suspected a thing and they kept doing it. James and Sirius would hide in the closet, bathroom again, and use the cloak of invisibility. James and Sirius thought they were close before but nothing was like being close with each other like being under the cloak with their cocks out in their hands as they watched Remus fucking you from behind.
They had front row seats to their favorite show.
Remus had you on your hands and knees on his bed. Heâs panting above you as he holds your hips while thrusting into you.
Sirius bites the inside of his cheek as he squeezes the head of his cock gently. James is breathing heavily, his round glasses start to fog up a bit as he strokes himself.
âRemus!â You cry out as he pushes the side of your face down on the mattress, you are facing James and Sirius now and they see a smile on your face when Remus holds your neck down. You love this just as much as Remus did.
Your moans become louder as Remus slams himself inside of you. The mattress springs creak so loudly by his rough thrusts. Your cheek is squished against the blankets. You hold on for dear life, your pussy pulse around Remusâ cock as he praises you for being a good girl with her ass in the air and head down.
They never would have thought Remus as a dom, he was too bashful and too respectful towards you. This was the same Remus that blushes when you call him baby and kisses his cheeks in the hallways. The same Remus that would walk you to class, carrying your books and even your bag.
That Remus is gone, this Remus is using your pussy as his personal pocket pussy and youâre just loving it. Even with his rough strokes, Remus leans down close to your face pushing his cock deeper inside of you.
Remus is muttering sweet words to you. Pushing your hair back, as he coos about your pretty face. He kisses your shoulders, as he calls you his.
âMine. All mine.â He says before continuing ramming his hips against your ass.
James was the first to cum, he always is. He just couldnât help it. You looked so fucking good with teary eyes taking a pounding from Remus. Sirius cums when you cry out for Remus to cum in you.
You are begging your boyfriend to fill you and Remus whines when he holds you in place. He leans over you and pulls your hair back, almost making your upper body fold back. He pulls you back by your hair and you look up at him with a pout, he kisses you.
Remus cries your name when he fills you to the hilt and paints your wall with his cum. James and Sirius just stare at both of you as Remus rolls you carefully on to your back. Heâs gentle with you as he opens your legs and makes room for himself. He goes on you to lay there with you. Caging your head with his forearms as he kisses you. You wrap your legs around his waist.
They liked watching the aftercare, something so sweet and tender. Remus kisses you so gently, it leaves you out of breath. They would watch Remus stare down at you with so much intensity and love.
âYou okay, love?â You nod at your boyfriendâs soft voice. Remus holds you until your breathing is back to normal. James whines softly at the sight of it and Sirius glances over at him. Itâs hot and humid under the cloak.
James and Sirius give each other the same look after every time they watched Remus and you. They always say this will be the last time. Thatâs what they tell themselves but the moment they see you pulling Remus into another room during a party or whispering in his ear during lunches and breaks. They see the look on Remusâ face and he grabs your hand telling his friends something had come up. Sometimes they know by the way Remus walks up to you.
They watch him walk up behind you when they see you talking to your friends in the courtyard. He politely greets your friends with a smile as he grabs your waist, hugging you from behind and kisses your forehead. He grabs your bag, telling you a lady shouldnât be carrying a heavy thing. Your friends are all in awe of his gentleman nature. You say goodbye to them as you walk with Remus whoâs hiding his hard on with your bag. Both of you are off to the nearest empty classroom. James and Sirius are quick to make an excuse to leave. They always leave Lily, Peter and Marlene baffle by their sudden departure.
Just a thought but Sirius or someone having a thing for you for ages and at some point you finally get together but Remus James and Peter just donât believe it because youâre so opposite and Sirius just trying to convince them but they donât believe him until they walk into you kissing or something. Love your work btw <3
kinda changed it to sirius being with someone they never expected but i hope you enjoy it! and thank you!!đ€
.
âPads is dating her?!â
Remus and James stood in front of Peter, lips parted in shock at the rumour that just left their friendâs lips. They had been in the common room, respective textbooks sprawled around them when Peter came rushing in, eyes wide and cheeks flushed at what he had just seen.
At first, they thought their friend was taking the piss and waited for Sirius to jump out from the shadows with a grin on his face, claiming it was all a prank. But no Sirius had appeared and Peter kept talking andâfuck, they just couldnât quite believe it.
In all honesty, it was shocking enough that Sirius had settled down with one person, let alone that he was dating you of all people.Â
You stood for everything they assumed their friend hated, purely because you wouldâve been Walburgha Blackâs number one choice to marry her eldest son off with.Â
You were raised with the pureblood etiquette, speaking prim and proper and not even allowing yourself to use slang as you spoke. You were a Slytherin, and proud to be so. You were crazy smart and you were the image of pureblood royalty, though the cold shoulder you usually gave people and the snarky attitude didnât exactly make it easy for even those with a pureblood complex to approach you.Â
Even if for some bizarre reason their friend had fallen for you, the fact that you liked him back was shocking enough to keep both boys seated on the couch as Peter retold the story for the thirteenth time.Â
âIâm calling bullshit,â James said with a shake of his head. âThis must be some elaborate prank heâs pulled off.â
âAnd what? Got her involved?â Remus asked.Â
âMaybe itâs someone with a polyjuice potion,â Peter supplied.Â
âOr maybe Pads is actually dating her,â Remus said before his nose scrunched up. âYeah no, heâs definitely up to something.âÂ
It took less than five seconds to work out where Sirius was with the help of the map that was quickly shoved in their pocket as all three boys began rushing towards the courtyard, so sure that whatever Peter had seen had to be false.Â
Because there was no fucking way that Sirius Black wasâ
All three boys quickly drew to a stop when they noticed you both. You were sitting on a picnic blanket, leaning back on your hands as you nodded along to something. Sirius, however, had his head propped on your lap, talking away as his hands moved animatedly to the point they could have sworn they saw your lips twitch into a smile.Â
âHoly shit,â James gaped at the sight.Â
âIt could still be a prank,â Remus said, though he didnât know how much he really believed that himself.Â
And just when they thought they couldnât be shocked any further, you leaned down to press your lips against the wizard, his hand coming to grip the back of your neck as he deepened the kiss.Â
âMoony, are you seeing this?âÂ
âIâm seeing this, Prongs.âÂ
âRight, great because I think Iâm gonna faint.âÂ
What they couldnât see was the way Siriusâs lips twisted into a grin as he continued to kiss you, his fingers expertly pulling the clip out of your hair until it cascaded around you both.Â
âYour friends are still staring,â you informed him, the words whispered against his lips as you began to pull back but he was quick to chase you.Â
âLet them stare all they want, love,â he murmured as his thumb lightly brushed over your thumping pulse. âI bet they are fucking confused.âÂ
âSuch crass language,â you hummed.Â
Sirius smirked. âGonna punish me, love?âÂ
You shook your head in amusement, pulling back fully despite the way Sirius playfully pouted in response. âYou wouldnât be able to handle my punishments, Black.âÂ
His eyes gleamed at the challenge. âIs that so?âÂ
âYou are all bark and no bite,â you informed him and the boy was quick to scramble up, his hands darting to your sides as he crawled over your squirming body.Â
âI can show you just how hard I bite, love, you just gotta ask.â
THIS IS A BONUS CHAPTER TO TULIPS! HERE'S THE FIRST BONUS đ€
Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader, Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader
Summary: Remus' reaction to walking in on you and Sirius.
Word Count: 564
Warnings: Slightest amount of smut & Rem being jealous (let me know if there is more)
A/N đ Here's the second bonus you guys asked for! As always I would love to hear from you guys, it keeps me motivated to keep writing.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
The door slams shut behind Remus, and he remains still for a moment, paralyzed by anger. Sirius was the reason you didn't show up; he should have known. Remus had waited for over an hour at the library, clinging to the hope that you might appear. As the minutes ticked by, the realization set in that you weren't coming. Yet, he stubbornly refused to accept that Sirius was to blame.
Months had passed since you and Sirius started your relationship, yet the sting of being replaced hadn't dulled. Sirius was now the closest person to you, and not him. The ache of that realization was a constant, unforgiving pain.
But more than anything, he was jealous. He envied every moment Sirius made you laugh, each kiss he pressed to your lips, and every smile you gave him that showed how much he meant to you. These everyday intimacies cut deep, reminding him of what he could have had.Â
If only he had said something, everything might have turned out differently.
If he thought he had been jealous before, he had been severely mistaken. He wished more than anything that he hadn't been so consumed by thoughts of you. He was so fixated on the idea of you that he hadn't even noticed the warning sounds hidden behind his dorm door.
The image of you, pressed into the sheets, desperate to give Sirius anything he asked of you. That searing image would forever haunt his thoughts.
While he couldnât see your face at that moment, and Godric, he desperately wished he had. He could vividly imagine the furrow in your brow, the faint smudge of lip gloss at the corner of your mouth, and the way your hair was a tangled mess, strands clinging to your sweat-covered forehead. The faint streaks of mascara traced the delicate skin beneath your eyes, marking the path of your tears.
As his imagination conjures up the most devastated version of you, he wonders: would you have looked that way for him?
Lips parted and pretty, pupils wide and dark. Hair damp with sweat and knotted.
He knows itâs fucked up. Beyond fucked up. But he canât help but picture you sitting pretty on your knees as you look up at him, eyes wanting. Legs spread wide to allow him to hover over you, placing hot kisses along your neck and collarbone. Bent over as he rails into you from behind. You begging for more as he repeats how much he loves you over and over, eager to show you that heâll do anything for you.
And he would, if you asked him too.
Anything for his angel.
His daydream is brutally cut short when he hears you cry out, âSirius, fuck, I love you.â The words hit him like a punch to the gut, and everything comes crashing down around him. His heart sinks, and he realizes he needs to leave before someone notices him standing outside the door. In his defense, he wasnât eavesdropping on purpose; he had meant to leave when his mind ran wild with the fleeting glimpse he caught of you. The urge to see you, to be close to you, had overridden his better judgment, but now he felt a wave of disgust and heartbreak wash over him.
Despite everything, Remus is devastated. He had lost the girl he could have been with, but now would never have.
ughhhh i feel so conflicted! the remus girl in me is feeling bad for him bc he canât have the girl but the sirius girl in me is so happy he got the girl! emotional turmoil ïżŒ
Summary: Sirius and reader forget to lock the door, and Remus walks in on them having sex.
Word Count: 3.8k
Warnings: SMUT! Rem walks in on Sirius and Reader, oral (fem receiving), p in v, and a smidge of possessiveness and jealousy.
A/N đ This has taken me so long and I apologize! I would also like to say that smut is not my strong suit, so I sincerely apologize is this sucks. Love you all!
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
If you had been in your right mind, you would have felt guilty. It wasnât like you to make plans and ditch them without any notice. You could almost hear Remusâs disappointed sigh, and you knew that once you snapped out of your daze, the guilt would hit hard. But in this moment, with Sirius's lips gently nipping at your neck and his soft kisses soothing away the sting, you couldnât find it in yourself to care. The warmth of his breath against your skin and the tender way he murmured your name made it impossible to think of anything else. The world outside of his dorm simply didnât exist.
The sheets of his bed are strewed about, and the coolness to them is long gone. Heâs propped up beside you, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. It had only been a few months since the two of you had gotten together, and his hazy effect on you had yet to fade. All he had to do was smile at you; you were putty in his hands. Siriusâs hands traced lazy patterns on your back, each touch sending shivers of pleasure through you.
You reassured yourself that you and Remus could always reschedule the study session for another night.
âSâpretty, angel.â Sirius murmurs softly as he pulls back, his breath warm against your skin. He drags his thumb slowly along your jawline, his touch gentle yet possessive. He watches the way your chest rises and falls, your breathing ragged and uneven. A smug smile tugs at the corners of his lips, knowing that heâs hardly done anything and yet, youâre already so worked up. The intensity of your reaction to his slightest touch fuels his confidence, making him want to tease you even more.
"Sirius," You whisper, your voice coming out much needier than you intended. The vulnerability in your tone is impossible to hide, but Sirius eats it up, his eyes darkening with desire. He revels in the effect he has on you, his smile widening as he leans in closer, the air between you charged with unspoken longing. âTouch me. Please.â
"I am touching you." He responds, his voice low and teasing. His hand trails down your body, fingers grazing your skin before pinching lightly at the outer flesh of your thigh, sending a jolt of sensation through you.
Your lips part in a gasp, and you quickly purse them, trying to regain control over your reaction. âYou know what I mean.âÂ
âI wanna hear you say it.â He grins and for a second, you feel too shy to tell him what you need. But Sirius gazes at you with such intense love and desire that it leaves you breathless and lessens the sting of embarrassment.Â
âI want you to finger me.â Your cheeks heat furiously, a an apprehensive look spreading across your face. Your fingers absentmindedly fiddle with the buttons on Sirius's shirt, the small task a futile attempt to steady your racing heart. The smooth fabric and cool buttons provide a comforting distraction. It wasnât like he hadnât touched you before. He definitely had, but summoning the confidence to ask for something like that was difficult for you still.
âThatâs my girl.â Sirius praises, leaning forward to place a sweet kiss against your lips, as if to reward you for asking for what you wanted.Â
When his lips met yours, it wasnât rough or fastâit was gentle and soft, as if he wanted to take all the time in the world with you. He brushed his lips against yours with exquisite tenderness, his hands slipping into your hair and tangling in the strands, relishing the feeling of you pressed against him. His kisses were tender and unhurried, each one sending waves of warmth through you, making you melt into him completely. The sensation of his lips moving slowly against yours was intoxicating, drawing you deeper into the moment.
He shifted, his body covering yours, as he pressed soft kisses to your lips and then down to your neck, each touch filled with a tenderness that made your heart swell. You could feel his love and care in every movement.
He brushed his lips against yours, mumbling about how much he loved kissing you, making you smile against his lips. His hands trailed over your body, barely touching your skin but enough to leave goosebumps in their wake. When he reached your hips, he gave a gentle squeeze, eliciting a soft gasp from you. Sitting up, he used one arm to bring you up with him, his strength both comforting and exhilarating. He shifted so you were now sat in his lap, your thighs bracketing his.
You couldn't fathom how you had gone so long without kissing Sirius; now that he was yours, you never wanted it to stop. His hands trailed along your thighs, squeezing and massaging the flesh every so often, sending shivers through you. The way he touched you was both playful and reverent, making you feel cherished and desired in a way you had never experienced before.
"Sirius." You sighed softly, the sound carrying a mixture of affection and longing. You pulled back just enough to rest your forehead against his, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours. His hands gently cradled your face, his touch tender and reassuring, as if he wanted to memorize every contour..
"Yeah, angel?" He asked softly, his voice filled with tenderness and a touch of eagerness. His eyes bore into yours, brimming with love and a hint of mischief, ready to give you anything you asked for.
âI need more.â
âArms up, baby.â He told you as he pulled your shirt over your head, tossing it to the ground. Watching his eyes raking up and down your body made you dizzy. You let his eyes take in your body before tugging at the hem of his shirt, silently telling him that you wanted it off. Your chance to admire him, drag your fingertips over the dips and ridges of him, and listen to the way his breath hitched in his throat.
After years of pining after you, he could still hardly believe that he had his dream girl sitting on top of him and looking at him with so much love and desire. What did he ever do to deserve this? To deserve you?
âYouâre fucking beautiful.â He mumbles as he slips his fingers under your white bra straps, letting them fall down your shoulders. His eyes tracked the movement, and you smiled softly at the way he watched you with so much admiration.
"Thank you. You're pretty beautiful too." You tease softly, circling your arms around his neck. Sirius responds with a devastating smile, his eyes sparkling with mischief and affection. You're so close that your noses nearly touch, the intimate proximity making your heart race. He places a quick, playful kiss on your nose, and the giggle you let out is pathetically lovesick.
"Damn right." He mumbles with a playful smirk, making you laugh.
You are about to reach around your back to rid yourself of your bra when Sirius stops you. Shooting you a cocky grin, he pushes your hands away from your bra to do it himself. The second your bra falls, Sirius lets out a curse. It has been months since you two first slept together, but every time he sees your body, itâs like the first time.
He swears that your tits are the most beautiful heâs ever seen. If he didnât already know he was in love with you, that would be his clue.
His mouth closed around your nipple, biting gently, ripping a gasp from your throat. Your back arched into his chest to give him better access. His arm wraps around your waist to haul you closer to him. Beneath you, you could feel how quickly this was turning him on. His hair was wild from when you had your fingers running through his hair. Soft sighs were filling the room as he licked and sucked, alternating between both of your tits. The wetness between your legs was growing more apparent as he touched you.
He grabbed your waist and moved you off of his lap, pushing you down so that you were laid out underneath him. His hands slipped under the waistband of your skirt, tugging it down, bringing your underwear with them. Your first reaction was to close your legs, still shy at the idea of him seeing you like this. But he gently placed his hands on your knees and pushed them apart, whispering soft praises to you as he did so.
You sat up as he stood at the end of his bed, slipping his pants down. Wetness pooled between your thighs as his cock was released from his underwear. You werenât sure you would ever get used to seeing him like this. A quick kiss was placed on your lips before his fingers brushed against your collarbone, pushing you back on the bed. With your back against the pillows and your legs spread, he finally got to look at all of you. All bare and glistening, and he swore he had never been harder in his life. He glanced up at you, asking for permission, and you nodded. Pressing kisses from your ankles to between your thighs, he slowly made his way to where you wanted him most.
âSâwet for me, love.â You could only answer with a whimper as trailed his fingers over your clit, causing you to sigh in pleasure. He was gentle, carefully watching your reaction as he teased you.Â
He moved slowly as he began to circle your clit, taking his time to warm you up. His eyes flickered back to you, drinking in the sight of your head pressed back against the pillows, your eyes closed, and soft sighs falling from your lips. The gentle rise and fall of your chest and the way your body responded to his touch filled him with a mix of tenderness and desire.
Watching you laid out in his sheets, withering in pleasure, all because of him? It caused heat to build in his stomach as he considered the idea of this being his forever. He could spend the rest of his life worshipping you like this, and he hoped to Godric you would let him.
The moan you let out was pornographic when he replaced his fingers with his mouth, letting his tongue slide along your pussy. From the bottom to the top, he licked through your folds. You could feel yourself dripping down onto the sheets, but you knew he wouldnât care about the mess you were making.
You knew there was no way you would last long. Between the way his fingers pumped in and out of you so deliciously and the way he sucked and licked at your clit so gently was driving you crazy. With your back arched and your head tossed back into his pillows, you whimpered out a plea for him to stop.
Sirius had pulled away from you instantly, worry etched across his features. The last thing he wanted was to do something that made you uncomfortable.âWhatâs wrong, angel?â
âFuck. Nothingâs wrong,â You had to clear your throat in order to get the words out. âI just-â Sirius thumbed at your hip to comfort you, watching as you shifted so you were holding yourself up by your elbows and looking down at him.
âCan you fuck me?â Your voice trembled softly, your eyes flickering nervously between his. Sirius wanted to cry. Could you get any more perfect?
He didnât trust his voice, so he said nothing, just leaned down to kiss your stomach before reaching beside the bed. He dug around in his drawer before grabbing a condom and ripping at the foil packet with his teeth. You sent him a soft smile, watching as he rolled the condom over his length and situated himself so he was between your legs.
Once settled, Sirius tenderly brushed a lock of your hair behind your ear and leaned in, resting his forehead against yours.
"Yâokay?" He asked, his voice laced with concern as he searched your eyes. You offered him a reassuring smile, feeling his warmth and care in the way he looked at you.Â
His hands wrapped securely around your ankles, the warmth of his touch pulling you closer across the soft, rumpled sheets. Laughter bubbled from you uncontrollably as he leaned in, planting a trail of tender kisses across your cheeks and forehead. The sound of your giggles subsided, replaced by a moment of quiet intensity as he leaned back, his gaze locking onto yours with a mixture of affection and desire. Your heart raced at the way he looked at you, and without hesitation, you reached up, threading your fingers through his hair, gently guiding his face back down to meet yours in a lingering kiss.
The kiss quickly deepened into an intense exchange, each of you vying for control. Siriusâs hand brushed against the side of your body, trailing down to reach between your legs while the other held himself above you. Your lips parted into a gasp when he brushed against your clit, and he took the opportunity to kiss you harder.
There was no way you could attempt to lead the kiss with Sirius brushing circles over your clit. You could hardly even think really. How could you when it was Sirius that was between your legs?
He pulled away to sit up, gently repositioning you until you were situated at the edge of the bed. His palms circled your ankles, pushing back on your legs until you were bent in half for him. Pussy fully on displayed for him. A satisfied hum emanated from his throat as he brought his fingers back to slide through your wetness.
And it wasnât long before his cock replaced his fingers, teasing your clit before sliding the tip inside you.
At the feeling, both of you let out satisfied moans. Sirius quickly grabbed your hands and intertwined your fingers before fully pushing inside of you slowly. âGodric,â He was nearly gone. âSo fucking perfect.â All you could do was moan in response.
His thrusts began slow, sliding in and out of you at an agonizing pace, making you cry out at him to go faster. He didnât listen.
âYou look so pretty getting fucked,â He reached his right hand down, using his thumb to rub against your clit in the slowest circles. âYouâre doing such a good job, sweetheart.â
If you hadnât been so fucked out, you wouldâve been embarrassed at hearing how wet you were. Your cries were desperate, pathetic. And if you were more coherent, you might have admitted that you weren't doing anything at allâit was all him. But you couldn't find it in you to complain.
âFaster. I need you to go faster.â You voice was as desperate as you felt.
âIâm being romantic. Fucking you nice and slow.â Sirius grins at the unimpressed look you send him.
âFuck me harder. Romantically.â
Sirius laughs, but obliges you. Dragging his cock through your cunt just a little bit faster, a little bit rougher. If your reaction is any indication, the change in pace is perfect for you.
He watches, mesmerized as your tits bounced with the pace he was setting and the way your head was thrown to the side, eyes closed, and lips parted for your desperate moans to slip through.
His left hand traced the curve of your side, pausing to squeeze your side, traveling further down until he gripped your hip. It didnât take long for the view of you fucked out and desperate underneath him for him to lose his patience. There was only so much he could take of watching your pussy take him him so well before he decided this pace wasnât nearly enough.
When he slipped out of you, you desperately cried in protest. But with a light slap on your outer thigh, he encouraged you to flip over. You relaxed into the sheets, content to burry your cheek against his crumbled comforter. Sirius seemed just as content as he drags him fingers down your spine, both his palms coming up to massage and knead at your ass. Your skin prickled with goosebumps as he placed as kiss on your lower back, right at the swell of your ass.
Impatient, you wiggled your hips, âSirius, please.â
âJust admiring my view, angel.â
âI need-â Your words die on your tongue as you feel his cock push past your folds, entering your without any resistance. He doesnât hold back this time, eager to set a more brutal pace. The sounds filling the room are obscene, and he realizes that this is the first time you two are having sex where it isnât considered making love. But he can safely admit that he loves all versions of sex with you equally.
Lifting yourself up so your back was pressed against him and your neck was exposed so he could press kisses against you. His arms slid around your waist, his right hand going up to grab at your tits as he nipped at your neck. Your legs felt shaky as he held you up and against him. The moans that filled your ears being this close to him drove you crazy. You didnât think you would ever get used to hearing him like this. So fucked out and close to coming.
âLove, please go harder.â
âYou want me to fuck you harder, baby?â You babbled incoherently in response, making Sirius grin.
âBeg me, sweetheart.â
âFuck, Sirius! Please, I need more of your cock. I want you to take me, be rough with me.â
He pushed you forward, forcing you back on all fours. You let out a loud âfuckâ when he shoved his cock back into you, not sure how long you could hold yourself up. His hands gripped your hips tightly, keeping you in place, and he slid his cock in and out of you, the room filling with both of your moans.
âIs that what you wanted, baby? Wanted to be fucked harder?â
As he quickened his pace, you stuck your ass in the air and pressed your cheek against the bed, raising your arms above your head as he fucked you. Your fingers were tangled in the sheets, and you knew anyone walking by could probably hear you. Out of all the times you had been with a guy, you didnât think you had ever been this loud. Each time he thrust into you, you let out a high-pitched moan, unable to stop yourself.
So focused on the feeling of Sirius fucking you within an inch of your life you donât notice the door open. With your cheek buried in the sheets, you didn't hear anything, nor did you see Remus standing there, his features displaying a mixture of shock and jealousy. But Sirius did. For a moment, he faltered, eyes locking with Remus's in silent astonishment. Then your protests filled the room, snapping his attention back to you.
âI want you to cum in me, baby. Please.â Your voice was wrecked, the strain evident in every word, and Siriusâs eyes widened in surprise at your unexpected request. It was a shift he hadn't anticipated. He glanced up, catching Remus's intense glare, his expression a mix of disbelief and anger, before Remus abruptly turned on his heel and slammed the door shut behind him. The suddenness of Remus's exit left Sirius momentarily bewildered.Â
How had you not noticed? Were you that fucked out for him?
Remus had stood there no less than ten seconds. And maybe it was because there was no way he had seen you. Not with the way you were angled and how Sirius had you pressed into the sheets.Â
But a sense of smug satisfaction began to creep over himâtinged with possessiveness. Maybe Remus would back the fuck off now that he saw how desperate you were for his cock. How wrecked and desperate you were, eager to be filled with his cum. And while he couldnât because he was wearing a condomâRemus didnât know that. The next time he saw you, he knew Remus would only be able to think about how fucked out you were for a guy that wasnât him.
He knew he would have to tell you what happened, but right now, with you begging so sweetly for him. He couldnât resist.
He fucked you rough. Eager to hear your whimpers and cries as he buried himself deep inside of you, pushing you further and further toward the edge. Maybe it was fucked up; how he was turned on by the idea of Remus knowing that you got so desperate for him.
But he couldnât help it. You were his. And he liked the idea of everyone knowing that. Especially Remus, who was still very much in love with you.
âSirius, Iâm getting close,â You whined, your voice shaky as he pounded into you. âGonna cum!â
âShit. Cum on my cock, sweetheart.â You knew you could let go, he sounded like he wasnât far behind you. You could tell by his quickened pace and sloppy thrusts.
When you felt him grab your hips hard and pound into you a few more times, you knew you could let go with him.
âSirius! Yes, I-â
âI know, fuck. Iâm gonna cum.â At that admission, your back arches as you feel your pussy squeeze around him. The moans leaving you were beyond loud, and you hoped to Godric no one had heard you.
âFuck.â He grunted as he thrust one final time into you before squeezing your hips tightly. The feeling of him twitching inside you sent you over the edge. You let go, pleasure coursing through you as you felt your whole body shake as the feeling shot through your entire body.
âJesus, baby.â Sirius mumbled as his head dropped to your back. You let out a giggle, understanding how fucked out he was feeling.
He slowly slid out, falling onto the bed next to you. You let your hips drop, moving so that you were on your side facing him. You were both breathing hard and knew you would need a shower and clean sheets after this.
"I love you. So much." You tell him earnestly, your voice brimming with sincerity. Sirius smiles softly at you, his heart squeezing at the sight of your messy hair and flushed cheeks. He reaches out, gently tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear, his touch lingering.
"I love you too, angel." He murmurs, his voice filled with warmth and affection.
Pairings: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader, Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader
Summary âż After finding out Remus Lupin has found himself a girlfriend, a devastated Y/n L/n asks Sirius Black to help her get over him. Except Sirius has feelings for her.
Warnings âż Language, unrequited love, angst, kissing, jealousy, reader wearing lipgloss and a dress, mentions of anxiety. If there's more let me know!
Word Count âż 20.3k
A/N đ This was my first ever series, but I've decided to repost it as a oneshot!
Your affection for Remus had begun almost from the moment you met him. For nearly five years, you found yourself quietly drawn to him. How could you not be? His tranquil and caring nature had eased your anxieties countless times. His unwavering loyalty to both his friends and his studies never ceased to amaze you. The bravery he exhibited each month, whether he acknowledged it or not, left you in awe. With Remus, you always felt secure, as if nothing could disturb your sense of safety.
Monday nights marked your routine study sessions with Remus, a tradition since the start of sixth year. Arriving promptly at his dorm, you were met with unsettling moans seeping from beneath the door, causing your stomach to plummet. Frozen in shock, you raced through possible explanations, with Sirius seeming the most plausible culprit. Surely, Remus wouldn't forget your study night, and the thought of another girl seemed inconceivable. As you turned around, anxiety coursing through your veins, you collided with Sirius, tears welling up in your eyes.
"Please tell me itâs James in there." You pleaded, the desperation clear in both your tone and your expression, causing Sirius' heart to sink. Knowing James was at practice, he couldn't bring himself to shatter your hope. Instead, he grasped your hand firmly and practically pulled you towards your dormitory. Despite the chaos of emotions, Sirius made sure to shield you with his own body, warding off any prying eyes curious about the tears streaming down your cheeks.
"Are any of your roommates here?" Sirius inquired as he halted in front of your dormitory door.
"No, Lily is staying the night at your dorm with James, and I think Marlene is staying with Dorcas." You responded, your voice tinged with sadness as you used your sleeve to dab at the tears staining your cheeks. Leading the way inside, you guided Sirius into your room, where he realized it was his first time seeing your personal space. Until now, you and Remus had been inseparable, leaving no room for Sirius to spend time alone with you.
He found himself a tad nervous, the proximity to you unnerving him in the best possible way. As he stood in your dormitory, the faint scent of your favorite perfume lingering in the air, Sirius couldn't help but feel a flutter in his stomach. It was an unfamiliar sensation, being so close to you without the familiar presence of Remus nearby.
"It wasnât James and Lily in there, was it?" Sirius turned to you, his expression filled with concern as he observed you sitting on your bed, visibly holding back tears, awaiting his response.
"No, angel." He replied softly, his voice tinged with empathy as he moved to sit beside you. A sigh escaped his lips as he settled onto your bed. Sirius knew James's schedule all too well, and he was certain that James was still down at the Quidditch pitch, far from the dorm.
Everything about your side of the room was perfectly you. Your desk was adorned with stacks of books, polaroids capturing cherished memories with friends pinned to the wall, and one of Remusâ sweaters casually draped over the back of your chair. Yet, amidst the familiar sights, a small glass vase seized his attention. Within it, a single red tulip, a gift he had given you a few weeks earlier.
As he strolled around Black Lake with the boys, he stumbled upon the patch of flowers, and instantly, he knew it was meant for you. Knowing how much you adored flowers, often doodling them in the margins of your Potions notes while seated beside him, he couldn't resist picking it. James, catching sight of the flower, declared that Lily deserved an entire bouquet.Â
You werenât taken aback when James Potter interrupted your study session with Lily by presenting her with a stunning bouquet of flowers. However, what did catch you off guard was Sirius' gesture: placing a single red flower delicately on top of your open book and sending you a playful wink.
"âMâlady." He had murmured, and at that moment, your cheeks ignited with a warmth you had never felt before.
Lily filled the remainder of your study session with talk of how a red tulip symbolized a declaration of love while you simply laughed in response.
Sirius glanced over at you, noticing the tear-filled gaze fixed upon your hands as you sat on the bed. He hesitated, the weight of his words hanging in the air. "I didnât know you had feelings for him." he finally admitted, his tone tinged with surprise.
You offered a soft laugh tinged with a hint of sadness. "I guess that means Iâm good at hiding it then. Itâs been a good couple of years now. Probably started the very first day I met him, honestly," you confessed, a bittersweet smile gracing your lips.
"Iâm sorry, angel." Sirius expressed, his voice laced with genuine remorse.
A gentle shake of your head followed. "You donât have to be sorry," you reassured him, your voice carrying a tone of acceptance intertwined with a hint of resignation.
"I couldâve given you a heads up," Sirius grimaced as your head whipped up to look over at him, the gravity of his words sinking in. "Heâs been seeing this girl for weeks. Heâs going to ask her out soon."
"Sirius-" you began, your voice carrying a mixture of surprise and concern.
"Iâm telling you this not to be mean, but so youâre not blindsided when it happens." Sirius continued his tone earnest yet tinged with regret.
This time, you remained silent, your gaze drifting over to the polaroid displayed prominently on your bedside table. In the photo, you and Remus sat beneath a tree, his arm wrapped around you in a protective embrace while your head rested gently on his shoulder. The memory of that day flooded back â discussing a book, laughter filling the air, and Lily insisting on capturing the moment in a photograph.Â
At the end of the day, with a knowing smile, she handed you the polaroid. The setting sun cast a beautiful glow upon the photo when you held it in your hand.
"Câmere," Sirius demanded softly, his voice a gentle command meant to pull you away from the intensity of the picture. He positioned himself against the headboard, arms open wide for you to find solace in. Without hesitation, you crawled into his embrace, nestling against his side. His arms enveloped you, offering comfort and warmth as he planted a tender kiss atop your head.
"What can I do?" Sirius inquired quietly, his gaze fixed on the tears tracing down your cheeks and staining his shirt.
"Help me get over him. Please." You pleaded, the vulnerability in your voice bared as you sought comfort and support from him.
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"Where the hell have you been? You nearly missed breakfast!" James exclaimed, his eyes scanning over your disheveled appearanceâyour hair in disarray and your clothes creased. It was a rare sight to see you, typically impeccably put together and five minutes ahead of everyone else, arriving late and looking rumpled. He chose not to mention the dark circles under your eyes or the absence of your usual cheery smile. He knew better than to bring that up.
Upon sensing Remus's scrutinizing gaze, you cleared your throat nervously and averted your eyes, unwilling to let him figure out that he was the cause of your disheveled appearance.
âRough night.â That was simply put. In fact, last night had been incredibly rough, leaving you worse for wear this dreary morning. Cuddling with Sirius comforted you for so long before you were back to crying your heart out. He was kind enough to hold you the entire time, and eventually, you had both fallen asleep. There had been no discussion on what you meant last night about having him help you get over Remus. You didnât know what you had meant by it either.
You grimaced as the memory flooded back, choosing to sit beside Sirius instead. He wouldnât admit it in front of the boys, but he was well prepared to knock one of them over if they tried to sit next to him. After the trying night you'd endured, he made it a point to ensure you felt at ease and understood that he was there for you should you need anything. Normally, you occupied the seat next to Remus, with Sirius seated beside James and Peter. However, given the circumstances, he understood that you wouldn't feel comfortable sitting next to Remus that morning.
James' gaze darted between the two of you, noting the departure from your usual seating arrangement. He stole a quick glance at Remus, who seemed intent on studying you. "Hmm. Why is it that Sirius has been quiet all breakfast, and now you are too?" he quipped, breaking the silence.
"Sod off, mate." Sirius grumbled, pushing a steaming cup of tea toward you. Despite the gruff remark, he offered you a sweet smile before returning his attention to his meal. Even though the gesture was minimal, it made you want to burst into tears. The fact that he remembered your favorite tea and how you liked it meant more to you than words could express. Remus, however, frowned at the cup of tea sitting in front of you, his expression troubled.
âWhat? I canât make conversation this beautiful morning?â Jamesâs tone was still incredibly upbeat, unlike those around him. Peter hummed in agreement, his mouth full of cereal and unable to respond properly.
"It's storming." Remus mumbled, his gaze still fixed on you, sensing that something was amiss as you avoided meeting his eyes. Usually, you sat next to him, cheerily chatting about another book you had read together.
"Are you implying a storm isn't beautiful? Because I happen to think-"
"James, let's just have a quiet breakfast this Tuesday morning." Sirius interjected, surprising James with the interruption. James opened his mouth to protest, but the seriousness in Sirius's expression halted him mid-sentence. Sirius's deliberate interruption was aimed at signaling to Remus that he had missed your study night. It served its purpose, prompting Remus to acknowledge the missed study date.
"Oh, fuck. Y/n, Iâm so sorry! Last night, our study night, I totally forgot," Remus blurted out, his words rushed and filled with regret as he watched your reaction. You simply shrugged and sipped your tea, avoiding direct eye contact with him. You kept your gaze fixed on your plate, knowing that meeting Remus's eyes would likely trigger another wave of tears.
"No big deal." You replied casually.
"Uh," Remus furrowed his eyebrows, his expression a mixture of concern and confusion as he searched your face for any sign of distress. However, your demeanor remained inscrutable, your face a mask of blankness. "Are you sure? I know you really wanted to study this week with your exam coming up-"
You finally met Remus's gaze, sitting up a bit straighter, "I was able to study, Remus, it's fine."
"You were? But uh-" Remus scrambled for words, uncertain how to navigate this tense exchange. He couldn't recall a time when you sounded so curt with him before.
"Sirius helped me." You interjected, your voice steady but tinged with an underlying tension.
James sputtered out a laugh, his gaze darting between you and Sirius. "He helped you study? Willingly?"
In reality, studying hadn't been the main agenda of the night. Before drifting off to sleep, you had hastily handed Sirius your flashcards from the nightstand, however, your pounding headache from crying rendered you unable to focus properly during his quizzing. So, technically, he did help you study, albeit minimally.
Peter raised his eyebrows, his tone laced with curiosity, "Is that where you were all last night? Studying?"
You squirmed uneasily at Peter's implication. Sirius shot James and Peter a sharp glance, silently urging them to stop talking.
Remus's lips parted in surprise as he shifted his gaze from Sirius to you. "He stayed the night with you?" His tone carried a hint of displeasure that didn't escape Sirius's notice. Despite himself, a slight sense of satisfaction flickered within Sirius at Remus's reaction.
Before anyone could respond, a pretty Ravenclaw leaned over Remus, enveloping him in a hug as she rested her head against his shoulder. "Rem, I thought you were going to try and sit with me this morning." She murmured.
Your body tensed at the sight of her; she was the girl from last night. A surge of jealousy, unlike anything you had ever experienced before, washed over you, catching you off guard. Your appetite vanished.
"Uh, sorry. I had to work on some things this morning and got a bit distracted." Remus's response came with a hint of discomfort, his apology tinged with unease. As you observed the exchange, you couldn't quite determine if his discomfort arose from her presence or the attention their interaction garnered. Quietly, you wished it leaned more towards the former.
Her lips formed a pretty pout, âHm.â
James unabashedly observed the pair while taking a bite of his toast. "You know, Remus, if you ever need relationship advice, Iâm here," he remarked, his tone teasing. Remus scowled in response, clearly unamused, while the girl giggled and tightened her grip around him, seemingly unfazed by James's comment.
You stole a glance at Sirius, momentarily tuning out the conversation to observe his reaction to the scene unfolding before you. Sensing the unease gnawing at your stomach, you instinctively reached for Siriusâ hand, which rested on his thigh. As soon as your fingers brushed against his, he responded by intertwining them with yours, his eyes meeting yours in silent understanding.
"Do you want to go?" he whispered softly, squeezing your hand in reassurance. Unable to trust your voice, you simply nodded in response. He released your hand momentarily, a fleeting disappointment washing over you until you watched as he effortlessly grabbed your bag and slung it over his shoulder. With a tender gesture, he reached for a muffin, noticing that you had hardly eaten.
Then, extending his hand towards you, he silently offered his support. Amidst James's lively conversation with the Ravenclaw girl and Remus's contemplative gaze, Peter looked on with a puzzled expression as Sirius extended his hand to you, a silent invitation to leave the discomfort behind.
"You donât have to hold my bag." You mumbled, rising to your feet to face him, intertwining your fingers once more. Despite the awareness of the eyes fixed upon the two of you, your focus remained solely on Sirius.
"I wanted to, angel." Sirius replied softly, meeting your gaze with warmth. The genuine smile that graced your face was the first of the morning, and Sirius felt as if he had won the lottery.
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"Y/n." His voice sliced through the air, causing you to freeze mid-sentence. But deep down, what had you truly expected? That he wouldnât approach you while you were quietly engrossed in your book in the common room? Your plan of avoiding him for as long as possible wasnât unfolding as smoothly as you had hoped.
"Hi, Rem.â You responded softly, offering a genuine smile. Despite the ache that lingered from witnessing him with the Ravenclaw girl at breakfast, you couldnât deny the bond you shared. After all, he was still your best friend. You couldnât fault him for getting a girlfriend, no matter how much it hurt.
Remus settled into the armchair opposite you, his expression earnest. "I didnât really get to talk to you much this morning," he began, his tone gentle.
You offered a nonchalant shrug, hoping to conceal the nervousness. "Oh. I mean, I wasnât in much of a mood for chatting," you replied, attempting to maintain a façade of composure, though inwardly, you were anything but.
"Is everything alright? Is this about missing last night? I promise that I didnât mean to, truly," Remus continued, his sincerity evident. Leaning forward, his eyes bore into yours, practically pleading for your forgiveness. Despite your resolve, his sincerity tugged at your heartstrings, and you found yourself wavering.
"Iâm not upset about you missing our study night; I understand that things come up." You reassured him as though you were anything truly fine. There was a squeeze in your heart at remembering Remus with another girl, a stark reminder that she wasn't you.
Remus visibly relaxed at your words. "We could reschedule it?" he suggested, his tone hopeful.
A heavy silence settled between you. How were you supposed to tell him that you didn't want to reschedule? That you weren't ready to spend time alone with him right now? Being around him now, knowing you had no chance, felt like a punch to the gut.
"There you guys are!" Jamesâ voice carried throughout the common room, effectively gaining more attention than he had probably intended. Sirius stood right beside him, his gaze already fixed on you. Peter was notably absent, likely engrossed in his studies elsewhere. Nevertheless, you welcomed the distraction.
James huffed as if he had been greatly inconvenienced. "We have been looking everywhere for you guys."
You couldn't help but laugh, "You didnât think to check the common room first?"
"Y/n, please. Donât be ridiculous." James quipped as he dropped into the armchair beside Remus. Remus's gaze lingered on you for a moment longer before he sighed and turned his attention to James. Soon enough, they were engrossed in their own conversation.
Sirius settled into the spot next to you, casually draping an arm over the back of the couch just behind your shoulders. As you leaned into his side and offered him a smile, he felt his cheeks flush with warmth. Your affectionate gestures toward him had always been present, but after last night, they seemed to intensify.
Your proximity never failed to make his heart skip a beat, and his stomach flutter. Despite his confidence in hiding his involuntary reactions to you, lately, it seemed more challenging for him to do so.
He greets you with the softest smile, his eyes reflecting warmth. "Hi, angel," he murmurs gently. Sirius had always affectionately called you angel, a term that secretly held a special place in your heart, one of your favorite things about him.
"Hi." You respond, a matching smile adorning your features, mirroring the comfort in his presence.
"I never got to thank you for last night." You admit, your tone filled with gratitude.
Shaking his head modestly, he insists, "You donât have to thank me."
"It made me feel better having you there with me, so of course I want to thank you." You express earnestly, your appreciation evident in your words.
Sirius leans in, his breath tickling your ear as he whispers, "We still gotta talk about what you meant last night. By asking me to help you get over him."
Feeling a flush of embarrassment, you sputter out a response, "Iâm not entirely sure what I meant. I figured you would know how to go about that."
"Why would I know how to go about that?" Sirius questions, genuine curiosity coloring his tone.
Shrugging, you admit, "I donât know. I just thought you might have. You have way more experience with relationships than I do."
Sirius snorts, a wry grin tugging at the corner of his lips. "I wouldnât call them relationships." he remarks, his mind briefly wandering through the array of flings he'd had in the past few years. None of them had left a lasting impression on him, none of them had made him feel the way you did.
You shrug, a hint of vulnerability in your expression. "Itâs more experience than I have.â
Your voices remain hushed, a deliberate attempt to avoid drawing the attention of James and Remus. Yet, the intimate proximity between you and Sirius could easily spark curiosity on its own. You're practically nestled against his side, his warm breath brushing against your ear as he whispers. To any onlooker, it would seem as though you were lovers, exchanging sweet nothings in a quiet moment of intimacy.
He takes a moment to collect his thoughts, acutely aware of the gravity of his next question. He understands that the answer could severely hurt his feelings, "Are you in love with him?"
Your reaction is swift; you turn to him so abruptly that your noses nearly brush against each other. Sirius silently begs you to linger closer, but you withdraw just enough to maintain a respectable distance. He watches intently as you steal a glance at Remus, your bottom lip caught between your teeth in contemplation.
"No. But, honestly, it probably wouldnât take much for me to fall in love with him." You confess, your words hanging in the air like a weight. Sirius needs a moment to recover, the impact of your admission hitting him harder than he had anticipated, despite mentally preparing himself for it.
You turn back to him, anguish evident in your voice, "How are you supposed to get over someone youâre nearly in love with?" Sirius hears the devastation in your tone, wishing he could convey that he genuinely comprehends that sentiment. However, delving into such explanations would only invite more questions, and that's the last thing he needs right now.
"I donât know, angel." He responds simply, observing as you anxiously pick at your nails.
A quiet lull envelops you both before you speak up again, "I donât think spending all my time with him helps. Maybe I should distance myself a little bit."
"Youâre welcome to spend all that time with me instead." Sirius offers, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer to his side. As you relax into his embrace, you rest your head on his shoulder. For a few precious minutes, you both sit in silence, lost in your own thoughts.
Remus glances over at you, nearly doing a double-take at the display of affection. You have closed your eyes, seemingly oblivious to Remus' stare, but Sirius him. For a brief, tense moment, Remus and Sirius lock eyes, but then James regains Remus' attention.
âSirius?â You ask, the weariness evident in your voice.
âYeah?â
âRemember when you told James to get over Lily that he needed to get under someone else?â Sirius immediately senses the direction of the conversation, and a pang of regret twinges in his chest.
âYes.â
âDo you think that really works?â You inquire, your tone tinged with uncertainty and a hint of desperation.
âFor some people, maybe.â Sirius replies cautiously. He wants to admit that such tactics havenât proven successful for him and probably never will.
You pull away to look at him, your eyes reflecting a mixture of hope and uncertainty, âWould you help me find someone?â
"Thereâs no way in hell Iâm doing that." Sirius responds firmly, his tone leaving little room for negotiation. But before you can protest, he interjects, "Iâll be your distraction."
"How exactly?" Your voice tinged with uncertainty, unsure of what he means.
"However, you need me. I know Iâm not the best study partner, but Iâll run through your flashcards with you whenever you need to study," Sirius offers, his voice softening as he glances from you to Remus. âI know you guys would talk about books a lot, so Iâll read whatever book youâre reading just to discuss it with you. Whatever you want me to do, Y/n, Iâll do it.â
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âYou and Y/n were cozy on that couch,â James comments casually, his gaze fixed on the ceiling from where he's sprawled out on his bed. Sirius glances over his shoulder at him, pausing his furious writing at the desk where he's been hunched over for the last twenty minutes.
âHm. I guess so.â Sirius replies nonchalantly, but his voiceâs a subtle tension.
âAre you sure this is a good idea?â James' tone carries a note of genuine concern, and Sirius immediately feels the weight of his friend's apprehension settling over the room like a heavy blanket.
âWorking on my homework? Yeah, itâs probably my best one yet.â Sirius responds, his tone strained as he tries to maintain composure.
âAbout comforting the girl you love because sheâs in love with your best mate.â James continues, his words cutting through the air like a knife. Sirius freezes, the quill leaving a streak of ink across the paper as his thoughts whirl.
He refuses to turn around and face James, not wanting to see the pitying look he knows will be on his friend's face. Instead, he runs his hand through his hair in frustration, his emotions simmering beneath the surface.
âSurprised you figured it out.â Sirius grumbles, his voice laced with a mixture of defensiveness and resignation. He doesnât want to confront the truth about your feelings for Remus. The mere thought of you falling in love with someone other than him ignites a pang of jealousy in his chest.
He wants to correct James, to insist that you arenât in love with Remus, but it feels futile. The reality is too close for comfort, and he can't shake the feeling of impending loss.
âAbout your feelings? Or hers?â James questions, his head leaning back against his headboard as he studies Sirius, his expression searching.
Sirius climbs onto his bed, letting out a sigh of frustration once his head hits his pillow, the weight of the conversation heavy on his mind. âBoth,â he admits, his voice tinged with uncertainty.
âI didnât notice until today with Y/n. She looked devastated when Adeline was all over Remus. On the other hand, Iâve known youâve had feelings for her for years. The things you do for her, you wouldnât do for anyone else.â James observes, his tone tinged with a mix of understanding and concern.
Sirius doesnât know what to say in response, but deep down, he knows James is right. Heâs always treated you differently, gone the extra mile for you in ways he wouldn't for anyone else. He had just hoped it wasnât so obvious.
James sighs loudly, the weight of the situation hanging heavy in the air, âYou gotta be careful, mate. Youâre gonna get your feelings hurt.â
âIâd rather my feelings be hurt than hers.â Sirius responds earnestly, his voice carrying a hint of determination.
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It was official. Remus Lupin and Adeline Reyes were officially dating. The news didnât come as a surprise; Remus had been bringing her around more often lately. She seamlessly integrated herself into your group dynamic, joining you all at breakfast some mornings and effortlessly engaging in conversation as if she had been there for years. Adeline adeptly kept pace with Siriusâ quick quips and could outwit James with a witty comeback. She was quick to include Peter whenever James unintentionally overshadowed him in conversation and was always eager to discuss the next book you planned to read.
It was horrifically frustrating.
You wanted to dislike her, but deep down, you knew it was just jealousy clouding your judgment. Adeline was undeniably genuine and sweet; you could easily envision yourself becoming good friends with her. However, every time she affectionately pressed her lips to Remusâ cheeks or leaned into his side, it felt like a sharp pang reminding you of your own feelings and the heartwrenching situation you found yourself in.
It left a bitter taste in your mouth. Just a few weeks ago, that was your spot, and you were blissfully unaware of his feelings for another girl. You felt foolish, caught off guard. Was it all in your head? Had you merely romanticized every interaction with him? Built up a scenario that never truly existed?
"Y/n, this is the third time you've spaced out. Are you alright?" Lily's concerned voice broke through your thoughts as she settled beside you on the bed. Despite James's insistence on a get-together downstairs, you found your mind drifting elsewhere. It had been a couple of weeks since Remus and Adeline declared their relationship, and ever since then, your thoughts had been in turmoil.
You shrugged, "I'm okay. I just don't think I'm up for a party tonight."
"You haven't seemed in the party mood for weeks." Marlene remarked, her attention fixed on her reflection as she applied lip gloss. Sensing something amiss, she pivoted abruptly to face you.
"Is this about Remus and Adeline?" Lily's direct question made your stomach plummet.
"I, uhâno." You stammered, feeling as startled as you looked by her inquiry.
"Godric, you're a horrible liar." Marlene remarked, tossing the tube of sparkly gloss onto her bed before striding over to her trunk and flinging it open. "It's okay to miss your best friend. You two are practically glued to each other's sides. I'm sure it's odd not spending as much time with him anymore."
Lily observed the subtle shift in your demeanor as Marlene spoke, although Marlene herself was entirely engrossed in rummaging through her clothes until she emitted a satisfied hum.
Shoving a floral sundress into your hands, Marlene declared, "Here, you're not wearing your uniform tonight. Wearing something cute will make you feel better." Your fingers traced over the silky material, white with colorful flowers scattered across it. Marlene observed as you held up the dress, eyeing the spaghetti straps and milkmaid top with uncertainty.
"It's winter, Marlene." You pointed out your tone laced with practicality.
"We're inside. But if you do get cold, Iâm sure Sirius would gladly warm you up." Marlene chirped, grinning at your surprised expression.
"Sirius is not going to warm me up." You grumbled as you stood up and headed to the bathroom with the dress in hand. With the door shut, you changed out of your uniform. You had to admit, the dress was pretty. Maybe Marlene was right; wearing something cute would boost your confidence and mood.
"Are you sure? You two have been awfully cozy lately!" Lily's laughter laced her tone as she called through the door. You slipped the dress on, then twisted in front of the mirror to assess how it looked. Concluding that you liked it, you also appreciated how it made you feel slightly brighter. It reminded you of a summer spent in Italy with your parents, where you practically lived in sundresses.
You turn open the door and twirl for the girls, who squeal in appreciation. Marlene snatches the lip gloss she had tossed aside, grabbing at your cheeks to dot some on your lips.
"We havenât been cozy. Weâre just acting like friends do." You mumble, your words slightly muffled from your cheeks being squished.
âBullshit! You never snuggled Peter, never did with James before he got himself a girlfriend,â Marlene turned to wink at Lily. âHonestly, you never did with Remus either. But you and Sirius have been all over each other.â
âWe have not!â You deny it, looking to Lily for support. But she only leans back on her hands and sends you a smug smile.
"The other day, I walked into the common room with James, and you were practically asleep on Siriusâ lap while he read to you.â Lily grins.
âHe was reading to you? Thatâs the cutest thing I have ever heard. Thatâs your love language right there!â Marlene's gasp was filled with awe, and you didn't know how to respond. Because you had indeed fallen asleep on his lap while Sirius twirled a strand of your hair between his fingers absentmindedly as he read Pride and Prejudice to you. You hardly comprehended the story, too focused on Siriusâ voice and his gentle touch. It was the first time in weeks that you hadnât thought of Remus.
âIt was the sweetest thing Iâve ever seen Sirius do.â Lily agreed, nodding in approval. âIâm telling you, he has feelings for you. Iâve thought so ever since 5th year. He pretty much confirmed it when he gave you that red tulip.â
âA declaration of love!â Marlene practically sang, her excitement contagious.
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As you reached the bottom step with Marlene and Lily, you let out a sigh. The common room was bustling, with students scattered everywhere, making the air feel stuffy and warm. You briefly pondered what Jamesâ definition of a get-together was, because this felt more like a full-blown party.
âJames said he invited hardly anyone.â You muttered to Lily, who nodded in agreement.
âHeâs a social butterfly, you never know with him.â Lily replied with a shrug, craning her neck to spot James amidst the crowd. She eventually spotted him near the fireplace, engaged in lively conversation with Sirius and a few other members of the Quidditch team. You allowed Lily to lead you through the throng of people, observing the lively atmosphere around you. Marlene had already disappeared into the crowd, no doubt on a mission to find Dorcas.
You can hear him before you see him: Siriusâ hearty laugh resonates over the music and the crowdâs chatter. It's a remarkable sound, drawing attention effortlessly. And there he is, standing tall next to James by the fireplace, a drink held casually in one hand while the other gestures animatedly as he converses with the guy beside him. Clad in a simple black T-shirt, Sirius exudes a captivating charm, and you can't help but admire how good he looks in the flickering firelight.
Though you'd never admit it aloud, Lily had been onto something. You and Sirius had been spending an increasing amount of time together. True to his word, Sirius had been a genuine distraction from your heartache. The activities you once shared with Remus were gradually being replaced by moments with Sirius.
It was no longer Remus, who you sat next to in the morning. No longer Remus, who you reviewed your flashcards with. No longer Remus, who would sit with you next to Black Lake and chat about your latest book. And no longer Remus, who would hold your hand to calm your anxiety every time you had to speak up in front of the class.
But it wasnât like you had asked Sirius to do any of these things. It was Sirius who had started it, not in an attempt to replace what you had with Remus, but to remind you that he was there for you. That he would do anything to make you feel loved. Sirius wasnât doing any of this because he felt obligated. He did it because he wanted you to know that you werenât alone and that he didnât plan on leaving any time soon.
But there were things that Sirius did that Remus had never done. Every morning, a cup of your favorite tea awaited at your spot next to him. He carried one of your scrunchies in his bag because you could never keep track of them, even offering to tie your hair up for you. Each time he walked around Black Lake, he brought you back a red tulip, which you tucked into the vase on your desk next to the others. You were building up quite the collection.Â
Sirius bursts into laughter, but his mirth is interrupted by James' boisterous greeting. The sudden volume jerks your attention away from Sirius, and you find yourself facing Lily, who offers a halfhearted protest as James envelops her in a bear hug. You brace yourself as James turns his attention to you, lifting you up despite your protests about your dress. After he sets you down, a moment of imbalance is quickly rectified as you feel an arm slip around your waist, steadying you against someone's chest.
"He's had a few too many." Sirius whispers into your ear, his breath sending shivers down your spine. You lean into his embrace, relishing the warmth and familiarity of his touch before turning around to face him.
With your palms pressed against his chest, you offer him a warm smile. "Hi."
He still holds onto his drink, but his pointer finger slips under the strap of your dress, giving it a gentle tug. "This is cute," he murmurs, his voice now hushed compared to the near shouting from a minute ago. His eyes meet yours, and you feel a wave of warmth spread through you. No one has ever looked at you the way he's looking at you right now.
"Thank you." You reply softly, surprised at the tenderness in your own voice. But you know he hears you as he smiles before turning back to the conversation he was having with a few other guys.
Pushing down your disappointment, you adjust the straps of your dress and take a breath, scanning the room for someone else to chat with. However, Sirius surprises you by wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you gently into his side. He continues to talk, his voice much quieter this time, but the three subtle squeezes let you know he's still there if you need him.
Lily catches your eye and mouths, "I told you so."
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You hadn't intended to eavesdrop, it was just a coincidence that you found yourself in the vicinity at that moment.Â
"You know, everyone thought you and Y/n were gonna get together." Peter remarks, nudging Remus in the side. Remus turns to him, likely taken aback. From your vantage point, you can't see their faces, but you recognize their silhouettes. They're seated together on one of the couches, engaged in quiet conversation amid the lively atmosphere of the party. You had briefly slipped away from Sirius to grab a drink, but now you're starting to regret your decision.
"Y/n and I?" Remus's response is laced with surprise, confirming your suspicions. You stand frozen, a few feet away from the couch, feeling your stomach plummet.Â
"Yeah, I think most people thought you already were. I mean, you guys spent so much time together." Peter continues, oblivious to the impact of his words. You try to avoid lingering on the past tense word.
"No, never," Remus hastily interjects. âI donât think I could think of Y/n like that.â His words landed like a heavy blow to your chest. You feel a pang of disappointment and hurt ripple through you, sitting heavy in your stomach. With tears threatening to spill from your eyes, you pivot on your heel and stride purposefully toward your dormitory.
As you navigate through the bustling crowd, your lips utter excuse me, and I need to get through in a mechanical cadence. Each step feels heavier than the last, burdened by the weight of Remus's words and the shattered illusions they bring.
Finally, the door to your dormitory swings shut behind you with a resounding thud, the noise a stark contrast to the chaos of the party below. Alone in the silence of your room, you confront the raw emotions swirling within you, grappling with the harsh reality of unrequited feelings.
Tears blur your vision so severely that you nearly trip over your shoes in your haste to remove them. With trembling hands, you toss the covers over your body, seeking refuge in the soft embrace of your bed. You bury your face into the welcoming embrace of your pillow, heedless of the inevitable mascara stains that will be left behind. A strangled sob escapes your lips, muffled by the sanctuary of your pillow, as you grapple with the overwhelming wave of emotions crashing over you.
The noise of the party downstairs serves as a comforting cloak, allowing you to release your emotions freely and without judgment.
The abruptness with which Remus shut down any possibility of harboring feelings for you cuts deep, like a dagger to the heart. The ache in your chest feels all-consuming, a relentless reminder that you will never be with him. Despite the rational part of your mind knowing that his affection for Adeline precludes any possibility of reciprocating your feelings, the emotional turmoil still wreaks havoc on your fragile heart.
In the solitude of your room, you allow yourself to cry. With each passing moment, the ache in your chest deepens.
"Y/n? Oh, Godric." Lily exclaims, rushing to your side with concern etched across her features. She gathers your hair away from your tear-streaked face, her eyes taking in the sight before her: cheeks flushed and blotchy, mascara-tinged tears tracing down your cheeks, your hair in disarray. She had sensed something amiss when she spotted you hurrying up the stairs, but the depth of your distress caught her off guard.
"Y/n, what can I do? Do you want a glass of water? Can I, uh..." Lily's voice trembles with worry as she looks around the room, searching for anything that might bring you comfort. She's witnessed your tears before, but never like this, leaving her feeling utterly helpless.
"I don't need water. Can you..." Your voice breaks, choked with emotion, making it difficult to articulate your thoughts.
Lily watches as you clutch your pillow tighter, waiting for your next words. "Can I what?" She prompts gently.
"I just need..." You falter, another sob escaping your lips. "Sirius. I need Sirius."
Without hesitation, Lily nods, determined to find Sirius and bring him to your side. As she exits your dorm, you sink deeper into your pillow, allowing the tears to flow freely. Your mind races with questions, grappling with how to face Remus again and feign normalcy.
You're not completely taken aback by his words; the past few weeks have allowed you to gradually accept that Remus may not share your feelings. Yet, processing this realization privately was less painful than hearing his firm denial of any possibility of reciprocation. Perhaps there's a tinge of sorrow in acknowledging this truth, as it signifies a shift in your relationship with Remusâone that might never be quite the same again. Accepting this reality proves to be a bitter pill to swallow.
"Angel," Your body instinctively relaxes at the soothing sound of Siriusâs voice. The pillow is gently drawn from your grip, revealing Siriusâ concerned face as it comes into view. "What can I do? What do you need?" he asks, his tone brimming with genuine concern and care.
Kneeling by the side of your bed, his eyes brim with concern, evoking emotion that threatens to overwhelm you once more. You lie on your side, facing him, your makeup smudged and your eyes swollen from tears. Despite your disheveled appearance, he finds you the most beautiful girl in the world.
"Hold on." He murmurs softly before disappearing into your bathroom. The sound of running water fills the silence, a gentle reminder of his comforting presence. Moments later, he returns with a damp cloth in hand, his touch gentle yet firm as he kneels before you. With tender care, he cradles your jaw, his movements deliberate as he gently wipes away the remnants of makeup from your face, his actions speaking volumes of his unwavering support and affection.
"All clean," he whispers softly, discarding the cloth onto the ground with the intention of dealing with it later. "What do you need?"
"You." You sniffle, tugging gently at his hand to convey your desire for him to join you in bed. Without hesitation, Sirius kicks off his shoes and slips under the covers beside you. With a tender gesture, he reaches out, his hand gently brushing the hair away from your face as he settles in beside you. Your faces hover mere inches apart, a tantalizing proximity that he tries to distract from by focusing on the simple task of brushing your hair away, the urge to kiss you tugging at the corners of his mind.
"Iâm sorry, I didnât mean to pull you away from the party." You murmur apologetically, your gaze meeting his. His eyes snap to yours, a flicker of offense crossing his features.
"I would drop anything for you." He responds earnestly, his sincerity shining through in his words, leaving no room for doubt. A sharp inhale escapes your lips as you stare back at him, the weight of his commitment settling between you.
"What happened, angel?" he asks gently, his eyes reflecting a hint of guilt for prying. As your eyes well up with tears once more, Sirius feels a pang of remorse for pressing the matter. He's about to apologize and suggest forgetting about it when you offer an answer, leaving him momentarily speechless.
"I overheard Peter and Remus." You confess, your voice trembling with vulnerability. Sirius forces down the surge of jealousy that threatens to consume him at the mention of Remus.Â
"Peter told him that everyone thought he and I would get together." You continue, your words hanging in the air, heavy with disappointment and hurt. Sirius listens attentively, his heart aching for the pain etched in your voice.
"Remus told him that he couldnât ever see me like that." You reveal, your voice wavering with emotion. "I know itâs stupid since he has a girlfriend, but-" You pause to draw in a shuddering breath, and Sirius gently brushes away the tears that cascade down your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose.
"It hurt," you confess, the rawness of your emotions laid bare. "That heâs never once seen me the way I have always seen him. Weâve always been just friends, and it sucks." Each word carries the weight of your longing and disappointment.
Sirius sighs, his voice tinged with empathy, "I love Remus, I do, but he can be blind sometimes. So in his head and down on himself that he misses whatâs in front of him. And he truly missed out on the most perfect girl there is. But I promise you that there is a guy out there who will recognize what an angel you are, and he wonât ever let you go."
Your eyes well up with tears again, and Sirius starts to panic that he said something wrong. But then you're wrapping your arms around his waist and pressing your head into the crook of his neck.
Your voice is muffled as you speak, "Please stay here with me tonight?"
"Whatever you want, angel." Sirius responds tenderly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, knowing there is no way heâd ever be able to deny you.
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James looks bewildered. "You arenât going to sit with us?" he asks, confusion evident in his voice.
You stand behind your typical spot, observing the boys' reactions as they stare at you as though you've just delivered the worst news imaginable. For years, ever since you had met the boys, you had been sitting with them every day. This spot held a sense of familiarity and comfort, a symbol of your friendship with them. Thus, your decision to sit with the girls today comes as a major surprise.
Lily, Marlene, and Dorcas occupy seats further down the table. While they would occasionally join your circle, especially after Lily and James got together, Lily had once confided in you that she valued having space and prioritizing her friendships, too; she didnât want to spend all her time with James. To everyone's surprise, James had been okay with this arrangement and had even agreed.
âIâm going to sit down the table with the girls. Youâll still be able to see me; we can wave at each other!â You offer James a hopeful smile, but he shakes his head, letting out a dramatic sigh.
Pointing his fork in your direction, James asserts, âItâs not the same, and you know it.â
âSit with us, I feel like I hardly see you.â Remus protests and your stomach sinks as you make eye contact with him. Ever since you overheard Remus tell Peter he didnât have feelings for you, you had been finding every excuse possible to avoid him.
Itâs been a week since the party, and you can now admit that you've successfully avoided any alone time with Remus. By now, it's clear he senses something amiss. Every time he tries to approach you, you have an excuse ready for why you can't study together again or why you can't chat. What's worse is that it's only him you're avoiding. You still engage in normal chats with Peter in the common room and banter back and forth with James as usual. And Sirius, well, you hardly leave his side. Wherever you go, Sirius isn't far away, a constant presence by your side.
Not only that, but it seemed as if you couldn't get enough of each otherâcuddled up on the common room couch, shoulder to shoulder during meals, and always side by side while walking to Black Lake. Sirius and you were growing increasingly closer with each passing day.
It was driving Remus crazy.
He looks at you pleadingly, his expression betraying the torment of seeing you drift away from him. You know his distress can't stem solely from your decision to sit with the girls. He started pulling away first, you think bitterly.
"Just wanted to spend some time with the girls, switch things up." You explain with a casual shrug, feeling a sense of awkwardness creeping over you as you shift on your feet. Remus wears a disappointed expression, while James and Peter appear to have already moved on, engaged in a bickering match over who gets the last orange.
"You've been switching things up quite a bit lately." Remus grumbles under his breath, his voice barely audible over the morning chatter in the dinning hall. Only Adeline catches his words as she pulls away to glance at his face, startled by the bitterness in his tone. Unaware of her scrutiny, Remus remains fixated on you, his expression betraying a mixture of longing and frustration.
"Okay, well, Iâll catch you guys later." You announce with a smile, and at that moment, Sirius glances up at you. He wants to tell you how much he'll miss you. Every morning, he eagerly anticipates the sight of your smile, the way you playfully bump your shoulder into his once you take your spot beside him. Your laughter and sweet smile are the highlights of his morning routine.
He'd gladly join you for breakfast with the girls if you asked.
To everyone's surprise, you sling your arms around Sirius' shoulders and tilt your head forward, looking at him from the side. Caught off guard, Sirius freezes in your embrace, trying desperately not to read too much into your unexpected touch.
"I'll wait for you so we can walk to class together. I'll miss you." You whisper, your lips pressing gently onto his cheek. A faint pink sheen of your lipgloss remains on his skin in the shape of your lips, a subtle reminder of your affection.
Before he can respond, you're already pulling away, leaving Sirius to watch you walk back to the girls. His cheeks flush, his mouth slightly parted in surprise. Remus narrows his eyes at the mark you've left behind while Adeline observes the interaction between Sirius and Remus, sensing Remus's agitation.
James lets out a low whistle. "She'll miss you, will she?" he remarks, his tone laced with amusement and curiosity.
âOh fuck off, mate.â Sirius grumbles before taking a sip of his tea to try and hide his smile.
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You sigh, slumping down in your chair, "I donât think I can handle another flashcard."
Sirius glances up from across the table, finding you lost in contemplation as you stare out the window. It's midday, and the sun's gentle rays illuminate the library, casting a warm glow despite the lingering chill outside. You both share the longing to step into the crisp air outdoors, yet Sirius remained steadfast in his commitment to assisting you with your studies.
"Do you wanna take a break?" Sirius asks, his gaze meeting yours as you glance up from the pile of books and notes spread out before you. Your lips press together, betraying the weight of your internal debate about whether you can afford to step away from your tasks.
"Come on, we can go for a walk." He encourages, his tone gentle yet persuasive as he begins to gather his belongings, preparing to pack his bag.
You concede, âA quick walk.â
The fresh air and the warmth of the sun against your skin felt rejuvenating after spending hours cooped up in the library. Your body ached, and your brain felt numb from the relentless studying. The only thing that kept you going was Sirius, who would slip you pieces of chocolate every time you answered a question correctly. Without him, you would have abandoned your studies hours ago.
As you walk, both of you are enveloped in a quiet tranquility, lost in your own thoughts. It's a comfortable silence, where neither of you feels compelled to fill the gaps with conversation. Instead, you simply bump into each other occasionally, exchanging shy smiles that speak volumes without a single word being uttered.
"Where are you taking me, Black?" You finally inquire, noting the direction as you pass Black Lake. You stroll leisurely, savoring the symphony of birdsong in the trees and the distant chatter of other students gradually fading into the background. Leaves shudder in response to the gentle breeze, prompting you to wrap your robes tighter around your body. Winter is approaching, and the biting chill in the air serves as a stark reminder of the season's impending arrival.
Sirius smiles in response, his expression warm and inviting, "Somewhere I think you'll like."
"Have I been there before?" You cast a glance at him, observing his wind-blown hair, cheeks flushed pink from the cold, and his bottom lip gently caught between his teeth.
"I hope not." He responds honestly, his voice carrying a hint of vulnerability. The possibility lingers, given that the boys are familiar with this field as well. The mere thought of Remus bringing you here tightens his chest. After all, you and Remus often took walks together, so it wouldn't be too surprising if he had.
Would Remus have brought you here, though? Sirius contemplates quietly. He's never heard you mention it, but he knows you would have. You've always cherished exploring the castle and eagerly shared your discoveries with the boys.
Sirius is startled when you suddenly gasp, excitement laced in your tone, "Oh my Godric. Is that a field of tulips?"
Sirius feels his heart swell at the excitement in your voice. Before he can respond, you stride ahead of him, drawn to the swath of red flowers like a magnet. He remains where he stands, content to watch you as you explore the vibrant field.
A pang of longing washes over him as he wishes he had Lily's muggle camera. This moment would undoubtedly be captured and proudly displayed above his desk among his collection of Polaroids.
"C'mere!" You call out excitedly, your hand extended towards him. Sirius grins, his heart lightening at your enthusiasm as he walks over to join you. Once he reaches you, he gladly grasps your hand, feeling a rush of warmth at the connection.
You lead him further into the field, your laughter carrying on the gentle breeze. Finally, you drop into the middle of the sea of tulips, tugging him along with you, and for a moment, the world feels suspended in the beauty of the moment.
Tilting your head towards the sun, you sigh happily. "I didnât know this was here," you remark, your voice filled with wonder.
"Found it with the boys a couple of weeks ago." Sirius responds, his fingers idly twirling a blade of grass he plucked from the ground.
"Did you pick the tulips you gave me from here?" You inquire, your voice soft with curiosity. Sirius nods in response, a faint blush gracing his cheeks as he recalls the memory. He's relieved that your eyes are still closed, blissfully unaware of his flustered state.
For a few minutes, a comfortable silence settles between you both, allowing the tranquility of the moment to envelop you like a warm embrace.
"Can I tell you something?" You ask, tilting your head back down to look at him, your gaze soft yet curious.
"Anything," Sirius replies, his voice filled with warmth and genuine interest.
"I've never been given flowers before. Whenever you give me a tulip, it's the highlight of my day." You admit softly, shifting so you're sitting with your legs crossed, a vulnerable honesty coloring your words.
"You've never been given flowers? Ever?" Sirius questions, his surprise evident in his tone and expression. You shake your head in response, confirming his disbelief.
He can't even fathom it. How could no one ever have given you flowers before? How does the girl who constantly doodles flowers on her notes never receive them? The thought perplexes him, stirring a mix of incredulity and a newfound determination to ensure you receive the appreciation you deserve.
"Guess I'll be making up for that then." Sirius decides, his voice showing determination as he sends you a devastating smile. Your stomach flutters at the sight.
"Sirius." you say softly, drawing his attention.
"What, angel?" He responds, his tone gentle and attentive.
"Thank you. For being by my side through everything." You express with sincerity, your voice filled with gratitude.Â
In the past few weeks, Sirius has been a constant presence by your side. Whenever Remus kissed Adeline, Sirius would offer a comforting touch, silently understanding your feelings. He'd weave silly stories to divert your attention from Adeline's flirtations with Remus, ensuring you never felt alone for even a moment.
He grins in response, "There's nowhere else I'd rather be."
âNowhere else, huh?â Your tone is teasing, and Sirius merely rolls his eyes at you, a playful glint dancing in his eyes. You observe him as he picks tulips one by one, gradually assembling a bundle in his hand. Watching him put together a bouquet that you know he will give you fills you with a sense of anticipation. Everything about sitting in a field of flowers with Sirius makes you feel lightheaded as if you're caught in a blissful dream.
Come to think of it, lately, every time Sirius did something for you, it left you feeling dizzy.
"You know it's true. I ditched Hogsmeade this weekend to spend time with you in the library." Sirius says, a hint of amusement in his voice as he recalls the decision.
"That's true, but I did advise you against it. I doubt a day in the library is much of a weekend highlight for you." You reply, raising an eyebrow playfully.
"If you think seeing you surrounded by a field of flowers isn't a weekend highlight, then you're sorely mistaken. Easily a monthly highlight for me." Sirius adds, his eyes sparkling with fondness as he gazes at you amidst the scenic beauty.
âYou flirt.â You giggle, your laughter echoing in the tranquil atmosphere, before reclining on the grass and shutting your eyes.
Sirius' features soften at your playful remark. "Only for my favorite girl," he responds tenderly, his voice carrying warmth and affection as he watches over you.
What started as a short walk stretched into two hours spent in the flower field, immersed in conversation and selecting the loveliest blooms together. By the end, Sirius presented you with a bundle of tulips in various hues. Upon entering your dorm room with the flowers in hand, Lily's gasp was so pronounced that it startled you.
âTell me that Sirius got you those.â
"He picked them for me." You beam, offering the bouquet to Lily for her admiration. "I mean, I helped too, but it was mostly him.â
âWho knew that he was such a romantic?â Marlene gushed, sitting next to Lily on her bed to take a peek.
âI told you heâs into you! Look at these flowers!â Lily cried out, flopping back onto her bed with the flowers pressed into her chest. Marlene laughs from beside her.
You rolled your eyes affectionately, âWe're just friends.â Marlene scoffs.
"No, you're not. That little stunt at breakfast you pulled this morning. Hugging him from behind and kissing him? Definitely not platonic." Marlene remarks, her tone teasing yet observant. Embarrassment floods through you; you hadn't planned on being so affectionate with Sirius; it just happened. You're grateful Sirius didn't bring it up; you probably would have collapsed if he had.Â
"I just kissed his cheek!" you defend, feeling a blush rise to your cheeks.
Lily grins mischievously. "You should've seen how he looked at you when you walked away."
"Totally lovesick!" Marlene exclaims, adding her enthusiastic agreement to Lily's observation.
"Both of you are being ridiculous. He doesnât have feelings for me, and even if he did, I need to get over Remus first." Taking the bouquet from Lily, you stride toward your desk to add them to your glass jar full of other flowers. You're almost out of the room. Soon youâll have to pluck out the ones that are dropping, but you donât have the heart to do it yet.
The girls were fully aware of the situation. You explained to them why you were so upset the morning after the party. There was no way you could have pretended like something wasnât wrong. With Sirius sleeping in your bed and your swollen eyes, there was no hiding anything.
"First?" Lily's voice carries a hint of excitement, exchanging a giddy look with Marlene.
You pivot, leaning against your desk. "What?"
"You said first. Like once you get over Remus, you could see yourself being with Sirius."
"No, I didn't." You protest, embarrassment flooding your stomach.
Marlene's grin widens mischievously as she exchanges a knowing glance with Lily. "Oh, but you did. We both heard you."
A nervous laugh escapes your lips as you playfully roll your eyes, "Oh, fuck off, guys.âÂ
Your friends continue to tease you, their laughter filling the room. Perhaps you were starting to form feelings for Sirius, but you preferred to keep them close to your heart, away from the probing eyes of Lily and Marlene, who always seemed to pick up on every subtle shift in your emotions.
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âThere you are! I was worried sick!â James exclaims as Sirius opens the door to the dorm. Remus glances up from his book, while Peter remains focused on his homework, unfazed by James' dramatics. Sirius, lost in memories of his afternoon with you, barely registers James' words as he flops onto his bed, a goofy smile lingering on his lips.
It's only when James tosses his pillow at Sirius that he snaps back to reality.
âOi! What was that for?â Sirius protests, finally acknowledging James' presence with a bemused expression.
âYouâre ignoring me!â James accuses, crossing his arms.
Sirius stammers, âI wasnât! I was just-â
James interrupts, a mischievous glint in his eyes, âDaydreaming about Y/n? What did you two get up to anyways?â
Remus stiffens, lowering his book to look at Sirius, âYou were with Y/n today?â
Sirius sits back up and exchanges a tense glance with Remus, âYeah, I was.â
He turns to James, âHelped her study a bit.â He neglects to mention the flower field, wanting to keep that memory to himself. Plus, he knows the boys will tease them every chance they get.
James stares at Sirius, incredulity flashing across his face. "That's all? Sounds boring. Should've come to Hogsmeade with us."
Sirius is about to respond when Remus interjects, his tone betraying a hint of disbelief. "I'm sorry. You turned down Hogsmeade to study? With Y/n?" His eyebrows shoot up in surprise.
"Yes." Sirius says plainly.
âIâll ask her to study.â Remus assures, as if that would settle Sirius. nonchalant.
Sirius shrugs, his tone nonchalant. "No need, mate. I've got her."
Remus furrows his brow, considering Sirius's response. "I can still ask her, give her another option," he suggests casually, but there's an undertone of something that Sirius can't quite decipher.
Sirius tenses, meeting Remus's gaze head-on. He's unsure if Remus is hinting at something deeper or if he's simply offering another study option. Nevertheless, Sirius feels a pang of reluctance at the thought of giving up his time with you, even for studying.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
Peter huffed, practically slamming himself on the couch next to you, his frustration evident in the way he dropped onto the couch. âRemus and Adeline are getting on my last nerve.â
James glanced up from where he was sitting across from you, his attention momentarily diverted from the game of cards. His eyebrows raised in curiosity as he observed Peter's demeanor. "They makinâ out in the dorm again?" he questioned, a playful grin tugging at the corners of his lips.
You turn your head to hide your reaction, your stomach churning with familiar discomfort. After nearly two months of their relationship, you still felt uneasy hearing about them together, effectively reminding you of your lingering feelings for Remus.
It would be a lie to say that your feelings for Remus hadnât changed. In fact, you were beginning to notice a subtle shift in your perspective, a gradual easing of the discomfort that once swarmed your chest at the sight of him and Adeline together. That twinge of jealousy you used to feel when looking at them was easing up, instead being replaced by a dull ache in your chest.
You found yourself increasingly preoccupied with thoughts of Sirius, his smile and the memories of your time together occupying your mind more frequently than before. You caught yourself smiling at the little moments you shared, replaying conversations and gestures, finding comfort in the warmth of his presence even when he wasn't around.
Peter shook his head against the cushion, his expression irritated. "No, theyâre bickering. They've been at it for nearly twenty minutes. Couldnât get a damn thing done on this essay.â
James wore a look of surprise as he arched his eyebrow, âTheyâre fighting?â
Peter looked away from the fire to glance over at James blankly, âNo, bickering. Thereâs a difference.â His tone is matter-of-fact and laced with frustration.
âWeâll be quiet, Peter. Work on your essay.â You promise, sending the blond boy a soft smile.
Jamesâ lips curve in a mischievous grin, eyes lit up with amusement, âGuess all relationships have to come out of the honeymoon phase.â He quips, tone playful with satisfaction. Peter sighs, tipping his head back onto the headrest of the couch like he canât take anymore.
âJames, itâs your turn.â You call, the gentle tap of your pointer finger against the cards catches his attention. His eyes flicker down to the cards sprawled between you both before glancing back up at you.
âDid you at least appreciate my pun?â He asks, a hopeful upturn of his lips present.
âIt was wonderful.â You affirm, voice soft as if youâre telling a young child that their artwork is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen.
Jamesâs face lights up with a satisfied smile, and his voice is full of teasing gratitude, âThank you, Y/n. I knew you would have my back.â
âWhat does she have your back about?â Siriusâ voice cuts through the air, his sudden appearance causing you and James to glance over at him. Peter opens one eye as Sirius sits on the couch next to him.
James stares at the cards while debating his next move, âShe appreciates me for who I am. Maybe you should take some notes from her.âÂ
Sirius hardly hears James. Instead, his eyes flicker over to you. He finds himself entranced by the subtle movements of your features, the way your eyebrows furrow in playful impatience as you await James to decide. The glow from the fire is dancing over your face, and he has the urge to reach out and touch your cheek, tracing over where the heat has touched. You look gorgeous like this, drenched in the soft light of the fire and so at ease. The words are at the tip of his tongue, but he swallows them down.
As your eyes meet his, a gentle smile graces your lips, and Sirius feels his stomach flip and heart stutter. Youâre looking at him with so much warmth that you could rival the fire next to you, and he knows he never wants to forget the way youâre looking at him.
Amidst the crackle of the fire and the soft murmurs of the surrounding conversations, itâs then that Sirius is struck by the sudden realization that sends shockwaves throughout his entire body. He is hit with the truth that heâs been avoiding for ages; he is entirely and desperately in love with you.
Sirius grapples with a fact that feels almost suffocating in its intensity. His gaze falls to his lap, the reality of his situation weighing heavily upon him. Heâs in love with a girl who holds feelings for someone else. Not just someone else, but Remus. His best mate, who, as of lately, has shown increasing concern about the nature of your relationship with Sirius. The way he pinches his brows together when you laugh at a joke Sirius makes, the subtle shifts in his demeanor whenever you show Sirius affection- itâs all Sirius can focus on. Remus sees you in a different light, and itâs making Sirius uneasy.
And so, he sits in silence, grappling with the truth that heâs fallen for a girl that will never be his.
âSirius,â You say softly, your hand gently resting atop his, hoping to bring him back from his thoughts. His eyes dart up to meet yours, and you smile softly. âYou okay? Youâre quiet.â
No, he isnât.Â
But instead, he offers a reassuring smile and squeezes your hand, âIâm okay, angel. Just tired.â
âNot too tired to lose to me in cards, are you?â James interjects, sporting a cocky grin and cracking his knuckles in intimidation. âIâm tired of playing with Y/n. She wins every time.â
Sirius laughs, hauling himself off the couch to sit beside you both before shuffling the cards.
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âY/n.â You startle at Remusâ voice, nearly spilling your cup of tea down your front. He sends you a soft smile, sitting beside you on the couch. You set your tea on the table next to you. Sitting up and shifting your legs to the side and underneath you, you make room for him. The way you were stretched out before hardly allowed him any room.
âRem.â You greet him, sending him a gentle smile. The corners of his mouth lift at the nickname; he hasnât heard it for a while.
He leans back against the couch, gaze firm on you, âHow was your day?â His voice is gentle and soothing. His voice was always one of your favorite things about him, always a source of comfort to you.
âItâs been alright, not too much to say about it,â Your left shoulder lifts up into a shrug, and you rest your right arm against the couch to prop your head up. Bodies both facing each other. âHow was yours?â
âJames nearly singed off my eyebrows in potions,â He says amusedly. Heâs got bags under his, and his body seems tired. You cringe when you remember the full moon was just a few days ago.
âNot entirely surprising,â You remark with a laugh, mind trailing to all the times James had proved himself not the best partner. As much as you loved James, his tendency to get distracted had cost you during classes plenty of times before.Â
âHowâs Adeline?â You ask politely, the words coming out with practiced ease despite the uncomfortable feeling in your stomach. Remusâs smile falters, and he lets out a sigh, gaze drifting away from you.
âI donât know.â He admits, hand coming up to run through his hair. He wonât meet your eye.
âYou donât know?â Your brow is quirks in curiosity, and genuine concern is etched onto your features. Memories of Peter complaining about the two bickering flickers back from a week ago.
âSheâs not happy,â Remus confesses, his tone is heavy with resignation. âDisappearing for a couple days doesnât exactly make me boyfriend of the year.â
You nod sympathetically. You understand, if you were in the dark about your boyfriendâs whereabouts for a couple days, you would be upset as well.
âAre you going to tell her?â You asked gently. It felt weird to talk to Remus again after going nearly two months without much interaction. All your time used to be spent with Remus, but Sirius seems to have taken that spot nowadays.
His gaze meets yours as he nervously bites at his bottom lip, he seems apprehensive, âI donât know if she could handle it.â
âRem,â You begin, voice soft and resolute, a reflection of the support you have always offered him. Despite the change in your relationship, your commitment to being there for him remains. âShe deserves to know, especially if the two of you want to be together.â
His brows are pinched tightly together as he wrings his hands together, âWhat if she doesnât take it well? What if she tells-â
You interject gently, âYouâve been dating two months, you should have a feel for how she would react.âÂ
He meets your eye with an uncertainty, âY/n.â
âYeah?â You respond, voice quiet.
âI donât know if I can tell her. I donât think it will be as easy as telling you was.â
âYou shouldnât compare her to me.â
âBut I do.â Remus whispers, the gravity of his admission catching you off guard. His shoulders are hunched over as he rests his elbows on his knees, hands still nervously wringing together as he looks over at you.
Your breath is caught in your throat. You break eye contact to clear your throat, shifting uneasily on the couch.
âAdeline is your girlfriend, and Iâm just your friend. You really shouldnât compare us, Rem. If you want to be with Adeline, you should really think about telling her.â You murmur, truth stinging as it leaves your mouth.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
Marlene sighs, her voice laced with playful incredulity, "Sometimes I wonder how James Potter managed to get you." Sirius barks out a laugh from his spot across from you, his amusement echoing around the room. Lily's mischievous grin widens as she shoots a playful wink at Marlene, enjoying the banter.
"I'm a damn catch, McKinnon!" James retorts dramatically, pulling Lily even closer into his side, the affection between them palpable. Lily leans up to press a kiss on Jamesâ jaw, a tender moment amidst the playful teasing.
"That lapdance you just gave your girlfriend? Horrific." Marlene shakes her head with exaggerated disdain, her expression a mix of amusement and mock disgust.
"If you didn't wanna see it, then you wouldn't have dared me to do it," James fires back with a smirk, the competitive edge still in his tone.
You're all gathered in a circle, indulging in a juvenile game of truth or dare. The boys took charge, rearranging the furniture into a circle so everyone could sit comfortably.
Marlene had insisted upon it, likely hoping to be roped into a dare that would bring her closer to Dorcas.Â
You're seated on one of the couches beside Lily, with James on her other side and Peter beside him. Adeline occupies the space to Peterâs left, seated next to Remus on one of the smaller couches. Sirius has claimed an armchair for himself. Marlene and Dorcas are cozied up in another armchair, much to Marlene's delight over the seating arrangement.
While Remus had yet to tell Adeline about his lycanthropy, he was attempting to make amends with her. You sent him a sweet smile and thumbs up when you saw them walking in together. It was clearly tense between the two, but that was to be expected.
Amidst the laughter and playful exchanges, you had failed to notice the tension simmering between Sirius and Remus, evident in the disgruntled glances they exchanged at being seated next to each other.
James turns to you with a devious grin, âMy sweet Y/n, you will be picking dare.â
âExcuse me? You canât pick for me!â You retort, sending James an incredulous look.
âBut I have the best dare for you!â James insists, leaning closer with a mischievous glint in his eye.
âNo.â You refuse, shaking your head slightly.
âY/n, please.â He pleads, attempting to send you puppy dog eyes. Marlene snorts from beside you.
Lily sighs, âY/n, do the dare. He will beg you all night.â You roll your eyes, letting out a sigh that immediately lets James know you have given in.
âKiss the person you are most attracted to in this room.â Your stomach sinks like a stone, regretting your lack of resistance to James. The group around you comes alive with oohs, except for Remus and Sirius, who sit uneasily, their expressions displaying discomfort.
âAbsolutely not. I canât!â Sirius feels sick. Youâre refusing because you canât kiss Remus- that has to be it.Â
âSorry, canât back out now! Make your way over to the lucky person.â James sounds far too cheery to be sorry.
The tension in the air becomes palpable as everyone awaits your decision. You draw in a deep breath, summoning your courage before rising to your feet and crossing the room toward him. The anticipation is almost tangible as your friends murmur excitedly, their eyes fixed on you.
You come to a sudden halt, feeling your knees bump against his as he instinctively sits straighter in his chair. Sensing your approach, he spreads his thighs slightly, silently inviting you to take the space between them. His demeanor shifts, a mix of anticipation and apprehension evident in his expression.
"Might make it easier if you sit in his lap." Marlene suggests with a mischievous grin, earning a pointed glare from you over your shoulder.
"You can, angel," he murmurs sweetly, reaching out to gently grasp your hand, his touch reassuring and electric.Â
You let out a shaky sigh, feeling a rush of nerves as you ease yourself into his lap, your knees sinking into the cushion and your thighs naturally bracketing his. Ignoring the whistles and playful comments that ring out from your friends, you focus on the warmth of his body beneath you, the steady rhythm of his breath, and the way his hands hover uncertainly before settling lightly on your hips.
"We're waiting!" James calls out, amusement laced in his tone, his eyes sparkling with mischief. Feeling a rush of determination, you gently bring your hand to his cheek, the warmth of his skin sending a shiver down your spine and lowering your head towards his. He's quick to meet you, his breath mingling with yours, noses bumping softly in a moment of sweet anticipation.
He's patient, his breath mixing with yours as he waits for you to make the first move. With a tender touch, you tilt your face closer, feeling the gentle brush of your lips against his in the softest kiss. For a fleeting moment, you both linger there, foreheads pressed together, lost in the momentâs intimacy.
âTell me this isnât because you couldnât kiss him.â His voice is raspy, filled with longing, sending your mind spiraling. His voice is quiet, ensuring that no one will hear him but you.
âYouâre the only one I thought of.â You admit softly, hoping you donât sound nearly as wrecked as you feel.
Sirius surges forward, his lips meeting yours with a passion that catches you off guard, causing a surprised moan to settle in your throat, lost in the whirlwind of sensations and emotions. Your friends' whistles and hollers fade into the background, overshadowed by the intensity of your focus on Sirius.
Your fingers weave through his hair, a silent plea to draw him closer, to merge the space between you. His hand glides from your hip, settling tenderly against your cheek, his thumb tracing gentle circles across your skin. When you roll your hips involuntarily, Sirius lets out a tortured groan and your blood simmers.
"Okay, okay! We've seen enough!" James hollers, his voice breaking you both out of the moment. As James's voice echoes through the air, you part from Sirius, the gravity of what you have both just done settles in. Your chests heave in unison, lips swollen from kisses and cheeks flushed.
Frozen, you and Sirius sit there, stunned, oblivious to the teasing of your friends. The air crackles with tension as you both lock gazes, the desire to lean in and kiss him again overwhelming you.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
Your mind remains frazzled in the aftermath of kissing Sirius. No matter how much you attempt to push it away, it's as though your body stubbornly clings to the memory of his lips upon yours, as if you're still nestled in his lap, feeling the gentle pressure of his hands on your hips. Both of you exchanged shy smiles as you gently slid off his lap, yet inside, your stomach churned with disappointment at the prospect of returning to your previous seat. Truthfully, you wanted to linger longer, to settle beneath his arm, and remain close to him.
In all honesty, Remus didn't even flicker into your thoughts when James issued his dare. The realization of this truth sends a shiver down your spine. When had Sirius managed to steal the place in your thoughts that Remus had held for so long?
Perhaps it was in the way he had cared for you like no one else ever had.
The sight of a steaming cup of tea, reliably waiting for you in your designated spot at the table. Even when he could have been enjoying himself in Hogsmeade, he chose to stay behind and help you study, just because you mentioned not having Remus to study with. And the simple yet heartfelt gesture of presenting you with fresh tulips just because you mentioned you had never gotten flowers before.
How had you moved on from Remus without even noticing? Perhaps that subtle ache in your chest whenever you glanced at Remus and Adeline stemmed from the change in friendship between you both. Maybe those tear-filled initial weeks spent with Sirius comforting you were a form of grieving the relationship that could never be with Remus.Â
While Sirius helped you to get over Remus, he had been gently guiding you toward developing feelings for him instead without even realizing it.
After watching your kiss with Sirius, Remus withdrew from the game entirely. The memory of your intimate moment with Sirius replayed incessantly in his mind, each repetition adding to the sting in his chest. In a fleeting moment of vulnerability, he had allowed himself to entertain the hope that it might have been him you chose to kiss. However, the presence of Adeline at his side swiftly extinguished that flicker of optimism, leaving him feeling profoundly disappointed and conflicted with himself.
The sight of Sirius enveloping you in his arms, and the undeniable chemistry between the two of you, stirred a thick feeling of dread in his stomach.
Each soft kiss, each exchanged glance, seemed to intensify the bitter pang of jealousy gnawing at his insides. It was as though a veil had been lifted, revealing a reality he had been trying to denyâthe depth of his feelings for you. And the realization that he might lose you for good.
"Remus! Truth or dare?" Dorcas inquired, her eyes alight with mischief.
Remus let out a resigned sigh; he wasn't particularly in the mood to deal with a dare.
"Truth," he replied, hoping for a relatively simple question.
Dorcas wasted no time in posing her question, a soft smile playing on her lips. "Who was your first big crush?"
The simplicity of the question drew an immediate protest from James. "Lame!" he squawked, his tone dripping with dissatisfaction. "Ask him something better."
Marlene swiftly came to Dorcas's defense, her voice laced with defiance. "Back off, James," she retorted sharply. "She can ask whatever the hell she wants,â She bit out before turning to Dorcas. âGreat question, love." Her words sounded entirely lovesick.
"Uh, my first big crush was Y/n." Remus confessed, his gaze darting toward you, eager to gauge your reaction amidst the tension. However, he failed to notice the subtle tensing of Adeline beside him, her expression morphing into one of disbelief as his words hung in the air.
Your brows furrowed, a mixture of confusion and frustration etched across your features as you processed Remus's unexpected admission. The weight of his words lingered, casting a palpable awkwardness over the group as you responded with an unimpressed look.
Sirius felt a surge of nausea rising within him, his gaze narrowing at Remus before anxiously darting over to you, waiting with bated breath to see how you would react to Remus's unexpected confession. Each second felt like an eternity as he searched for any sign of your thoughts or emotions, his heart pounding in his chest with a mixture of dread and anticipation.
As he watched your expression carefully, Sirius couldn't help but wonder what you were thinking. Were you filled with hope at his confession? Did you still want him?
âThatâs not funny, Rem.â You retort, sending him an entirely unimpressed look.
âIâm not joking.â He insists, his voice has a hint of vulnerability in it. Adeline sends him an incredulous look, but his eyes are solely trained on you.
âThatâs bullshit.â You countered, your voice laced with frustration as you pushed back. The tension between you and Remus was palpable, your friends watching both of you carefully. Unsure if they should intervene or not.
âItâs not. Started fourth year, I liked you for years.â Remus confesses, hand tugging through his hair in frustration.
âYou said you would never have feelings for me.â Your brows are pinched in disbelief, your voice filled with hurt and frustration.
Remus looks entirely confused, âWhat are you talking about?â
âWith Peter! At the party like a month ago.â You exclaim, memory fresh in your mind. While your feelings for Remus may have faded, the pain from his words hadnât.
Remus shakes his head slowly, eyes searching yours for understanding, âI never said that, love.â
âYou did. You told Peter, âI donât think I could ever think about Y/n like that.ââ You reiterated, your voice tinged with disappointment as Remusâs expression faltered, his own words echoing back to him.
âYou didnât hear the rest then.â He says, his voice filled with regret and desperation for you to understand.
Your frustration has bubbled to the surface, âOh, great. So glad I didnât stay to hear you continue about how awful it is that everyone thought we would end up together.â Your words are a mixture of sarcasm and hurt
"Y/n, I-" Remus began, his voice trailing off as you cut him off with a sharp interruption.
"Do you know what that feels like? To hear your best friend talk about you with so much disgust?" you demanded, the hurt evident in your voice as you confronted him head-on.
"I wasnât disgusted!" Remus protested, his own frustration rising to meet yours. "You didnât hear the rest!" he insisted, his tone tinged with desperation as he struggled to convey his side of the story.
"What else did you say?" It was Adeline who broke the tense silence, her voice cutting through the air like a knife. Remus's gaze shifted to her, startled by her sudden interjection. Her expression was one of disbelief, her brows furrowed and her arms crossed tightly over her chest, a silent testament to her own confusion and dismay at the unfolding situation.
"I said I didnât think I could think about you like that because of-" Remus's voice faltered, his words hanging in the charged air. You leaned forward, your frustration palpable as you awaited his explanation, your gaze unwavering as you demanded clarity.
"Because of what, Remus?" You pressed, the tension thickening with each passing moment. Remus's eyes darted briefly to Sirius, a flicker of hesitation betraying his inner turmoil, but you caught the movement.
Sensing the rising tension, you glanced over at Sirius, who watches Remus with a tense look. His expression carried a silent message. Urging Remus to choose his words carefully.
âDonât you fucking dare.â Sirius grits out, his voice laced with a raw edge of warning. Remus's uncertainty is evident as he grapples with what heâs just implied.
âDo you still have feelings for her?â Adeline's voice trembles with devastation as she poses the question, her heart laid bare in the vulnerability of the moment. Sirius's reaction is immediate; he stands up abruptly, his movements tense with unspoken frustration as he strides towards the stairs, refusing to linger for Remus's response.
âSirius.â You call out desperately, rising to your feet swiftly to intercept him. He starts heading for his dorm, but you gently grab his wrist and guide him toward yours instead. Without a word, he follows your lead until you reach your door, both of you stepping inside quietly.
Sirius doesnât utter a word, his silence filling the space between you as he leans back against your door. His head tilts upward, his gaze fixed on the ceiling as if searching for answers in its expanse.Â
You step closer, closing the distance between you, your footsteps echoing softly in the quiet room. With a gentle touch, you place your hand on his cheek, a tender gesture designed to draw his attention back to you. You find yourself more preoccupied with Sirius than the recent events downstairs. Dealing with the situation involving Remus can wait; at this moment, your main concern is resolving things with Sirius.
He lets out a sigh, the weight of his emotions palpable as he drops his gaze from the ceiling to meet yours. "I'm sorry," he murmurs, his voice laced with a mixture of remorse and vulnerability.
You can't help but laugh incredulously at his apology, the sound carrying a blend of surprise and amusement. "What are you sorry for?" You inquire, your tone gentle yet tinged with curiosity, as you search his eyes for the answer.
He sighs, âThat you found out this way.â
âAbout what?â You both know that you already know the answer but that you just want him to say it.
âAbout Remusâs feelings for you, about my feelings for you.â Sirius admits, his voice soft as he swallows harshly.
You take a deliberate step closer to him, closing the gap between you with a sense of purpose. "And what are your feelings for me?" you repeat, your tone carrying a playful lilt, a silent challenge lingering in your words, daring him to bare his heart to you.
"Y/n," he pleads softly, his hands instinctively finding their place on your hips, drawing you closer to him just an inch. âRemus pretty much spelled it out, didnât he?â
"I donât want to hear it from Remus, I want to hear it from you.â You assert, your voice tinged with determination as you press closer to him. His eyes flit down to the diminishing space between your bodies.
He sighs, a soft exhalation laden with unspoken emotions, âYou drive me crazy.â He confesses, shaking his head in gentle disbelief. A grin spreads across your face, your heart lightening at the familiar banter between you.
"Yeah? Is that all?" you tease, a playful glint in your eyes as your arms rise to encircle his neck, drawing him closer.
His gaze softens, a hint of vulnerability shining through as he meets your eyes. "Iâm crazy about you, have been since the moment I met you." He confesses, his voice filled with sincerity and warmth.
His words ignite a flutter of excitement in the pit of your stomach, a giddiness that bubbles up from within. Unable to contain the surge of emotions, you rise onto your toes, closing the gap between you as your lips meet his in a gentle kiss. He lets out a surprised hum, circling his arms around your waist and hauling you into him.
He pulls back slightly, resting his forehead on yours, his expression tinged with uncertainty, "Y/n,â He murmurs, his voice laced with apprehension, âI canât do this if you still want Remus.â
You pull back slightly, creating a small space between you yet maintaining the intimacy of your connection as you gaze into his eyes. "Do you think I would have followed you if I still wanted Remus?" You inquire softly, your voice imbued with sincerity.
"I meant every word when I told you that you were the only one I thought of for Jamesâ dare." You continue, your words carrying a gentle reassurance, seeking to dispel any lingering doubts or insecurities that may linger between you.
"I want you, Sirius." You whisper earnestly, your voice soft yet resolute, laying bare your desires and intentions as you seek clarity and connection with him.
The smile he gives you is radiant, brimming with unabridged happiness, illuminating his features with an undeniable warmth that reflects the depth of his emotions.
"I've been dreaming of you saying that for ages." You squeal with uncontainable delight as he dips down and scoops you up, your legs instinctively circling his waist. Together, you embark on a journey towards your bed, his steps sure and purposeful, each movement imbued with a sense of anticipation and excitement.
He settles onto the bed, seating you gently in his lap, and you can't help but giggle uncontrollably, the sound filling the room with infectious joy as you revel in the sheer exhilaration of the moment shared between you.
As you lean down and press your lips onto his, he exhales softly, as if shedding all his worries, finding true peace in the gentle brush of your lips against his. He's never encountered a feeling of rightness as profound as this throughout his life. He is completely done for.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
Lily and Marlene didn't return to the dorm last night. After the awkward end to your game of truth or dare, you assumed they were giving you some space. And frankly, you were grateful for it.Â
You weren't eager to delve into the topic of Remus confessing his past feelings for you. Although he didn't explicitly reveal whether or not those feelings still lingered, the reactions from both Adeline and Sirius served as a telling response.
You knew that a conversation with Remus was inevitable. Yet nervousness gnawed at you. What if there was no salvaging what remained of your friendship? Despite the awkwardness of the past few months, the desire to keep him in your life persisted, making the conversation all the more important.
The night unfolded with you and Sirius intertwined, lost in stolen kisses and hushed conversations within the dimly lit dorm. You had never felt so content in your whole life. Being with Sirius felt like a breath of fresh air. There were no lingering doubts about his feelings; his actions spoke volumes, leaving no room for uncertainty. Reflecting on the past, you couldn't help but wonder how you had ever been so blind to his affections.
âYou almost ready mâlove?â Sirius called, casting a glance your way as he deftly tied his tie in front of your mirror.
His endearment sent a flutter through your heart. It felt as though the kiss with Sirius last night had unleashed a torrent of emotions, flooding your senses with newfound intensity. It sent a thrill through your body, yet you felt somewhat disheartened as well. How had you managed to overlook Sirius for so long? He had been there all along, yet you found yourself pining over Remus, who had seemed indifferent to your feelings.
"Yeah, whenever youâre ready." You offered a soft smile as you slipped on your final shoe, steadying yourself with a gentle grip on the bedpost.
You stood up, making your way over to Sirius who met you halfway, placing his hands on your hips. You wrapped around your arms around his neck, pulling yourself closer to him. He smiled down as you, tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear before putting his hand back to your hip.
You rose to your full height, crossing the distance to Sirius, who advanced to meet you halfway, his hands finding their place on your hips. You encircled your arms around his neck, drawing yourself nearer to him. He smiled warmly down at you, delicately tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear before returning his hand to your hip.
"How do you want to go about this?" Sirius asked his brow furrowing with a hint of unease, his gaze searching yours for guidance.
Your brow pinched in confusion, "Go about what? Us?" For a brief moment, the idea crossed your mind â did Sirius want to go back to the way things were before? However, that thought evaporated as quickly as it appeared when you recalled the firmness of his embrace, the intensity in his gaze fixed upon you.
He nodded, his expression softening with concern. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I understand things might be tense with Remus, and I donât want to make it harder for you."
"You know what I want?" Sirius tightened his embrace, prompting you to elaborate. "I want you to treat me like Iâm yours, show everyone that weâre together. I couldn't care less about what anyone thinks." Both of you understood that anyone referred to Remus. Sirius remained silent, his gaze fixed on you, his expression indecipherable.
Your expression shifted to one of uncertainty, your brows furrowing slightly as you sought clarification. "We're together, right?" You asked, your voice tinged with a hint of vulnerability, searching his eyes for confirmation.Â
Sirius's smile radiated such genuine warmth that a flutter of attraction danced in your stomach, âYeah, baby. Weâre together.â He couldn't fathom that he held you, his dream girl, in his arms, asking him if the two of you were together. It took him a moment to fully grasp the reality of the moment.Â
He continued, âDonât think that Iâm not going to properly ask you to be mine, though, because I will. I promise.â
Unable to resist, you leaned in, capturing his lips with your own. Instantly, he responded, returning the kiss with equal fervor and intention.
With a reluctant sigh, you pulled away, your fingers lingering against his cheek as you whispered, "We need to get to breakfast."
"I think I can starve." Sirius shrugged nonchalantly, a mischievous glint dancing in his eyes as he leaned down to capture your lips once more.
You couldn't help but giggle, gently pushing him away, "Stop it, we gotta go. Weâre going to be late." You insisted, a hint of laughter dancing in your voice as you playfully nudged him towards the door, the lingering taste of his kiss still tingling on your lips.
As you entered the common room, a wave of surprise washed over you at the sight of all your friends gathered, comfortably sprawled across the couches and armchairs. You slowed to a stop, catching Sirius off guard as he turned to follow your gaze, his eyes widening in surprise as they landed on the familiar faces of your friends.
"We wanted to make sure you two were okay after last night," Lily paused, her gaze piercing as she shot a pointed glare at Remus, who visibly shrank into the couch cushions. He appeared exhausted as if he hadn't slept all night, and you couldn't help but notice Adeline's absence beside him.Â
"But it looks like everything is good?" Lily continued, her voice hopeful as her eyes dropped down to where your hand intertwined with Sirius'.
"Everything's fine," you affirm, offering a soft smile as Sirius squeezes your hand reassuringly. "But I need to talk to you, Rem. Alone.â You add, your tone gentle yet firm, conveying the importance of the coming conversation.
Sirius is the first to break the tense silence, shifting slightly while the others remain rooted in place, their eyes flitting between Remus and you. The atmosphere feels charged with unease, and you can sense the weight of Lily's unspoken words lingering in the air, knowing full well she gave Remus a piece of her mind the moment you left last night.
Before he can move away, you pull him back, your hand gently tugging him closer as you press your lips to his. A surprised sound escapes him before his hands come up to hold your cheeks. Remus clenches his jaw, unable to watch as you both melt into each other.Â
James lets out a low, appreciative whistle, and Lily suppresses a smile behind her hand. Peter and Dorcas avert their gaze shyly while Marlene beams at the sight of Sirius melting into you. It's evident that they're all on Team Sirius.
As you both draw back, your gazes locked in mutual adoration, Sirius places another swift kiss on your lips. "I'll have your tea waiting for you," he promises softly.
A bright smile spreads across your face. "Thank you," you reply, your voice filled with warmth and gratitude.
As Sirius finally draws back, the others follow suit. James is already by his best friend's side, chatting animatedly. Lily and Marlene exchange knowing grins with you, silently promising a conversation later. Meanwhile, Peter and Dorcas trail behind, engaging in casual conversation as they meander along.
You sigh, bracing yourself for what promises to be an awkward conversation, and then take a seat beside Remus on the couch. The tension in the air is palpable, amplified by the near emptiness of the common room. Remus sits up straight, stealing a glance in your direction, his demeanor reflecting the unease of the moment.
âAre you okay?â Remus looks mildly surprised, that wasnât the first thing he expected you to ask.
He clears his throat nervously, âUh, Iâve been better, honestly. Are you?âÂ
He observes as you gracefully draw your legs onto the couch, tucking them underneath you. Finally, you meet his gaze, and he's momentarily taken aback by your beauty. A pang of regret hits him like a wave â he wishes he had confronted his feelings for you earlier. Perhaps then, it would have been him sharing kisses with you instead of watching you with his best mate.
"I'm good." Remus watches as you absentmindedly bring your fingers up to brush against your lips, a lovesick expression softening your features. You appear momentarily lost in thought, a dazed quality to your gaze.Â
Clearing your throat, you shake off your thoughts, "But I'm disappointed about last night. What on hell was that?"
"Y/n," Remus's voice quivered with sincerity as he addressed you, his eyes reflecting the remorse weighing heavily upon him. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to upset you." He whispered, the words thick with sincerity..Â
You sighed, the weight of your frustration and disappointment lacing your tone, "And Adeline?" Remus looked startled. In the wake of you rushing to follow Sirius, Adeline had bravely broached the subject of his feelings towards you. Caught off guard, Remus found himself grappling for words, acutely aware of his friends' scrutinizing gazes, which bore a mixture of astonishment and disapproval. His hesitation was a silent confession to Adeline, who gathered her belongings swiftly, her departure punctuating the air with an unspoken disappointment. In the ensuing silence, Remus remained rooted, torn between pursuing you and granting you the space he sensed you needed. Regrettably, the thought of going after Adeline hadn't even crossed his mind amidst the dread sitting heavy in his stomach. Remus understood he had messed up, and the weight of his mistake hung heavy upon him.
âShe left. I donât blame her, I hurt her. Who gets a girlfriend when they have feelings for someone else?â A laugh escaped Remus, laden with incredulity.Â
His words prompted you to avert your gaze, a subtle gesture betraying the unease settling in the pit of your stomach. The acknowledgment that his feelings for you still lingered left you with an odd feeling in the pit of your stomach.
Silence settles between you both, and it's excruciatingly awkward.
âIâm falling in love with Sirius,â You blurt out, nervously stealing a glance at him, eager to gauge his reaction. âI just, I need you to know that thereâs no way anything couldâve happened between us. A couple months ago it wouldâve been entirely different. But I was devastated, Rem. Do you know how hard it was for me to watch you be with Adeline? How much that hurt? And then you just admit you have feelings in front of everyone no less, like it wasnât a big deal. In front of your girlfriend, who clearly cares so much about you. I donât understand.â
"Dorcas askedâ" He began, his voice sounded shaky.
"But you could've passed, or chosen to say another old crush's name!" Your interjection cut through the air, sharp and pointed.
"But there wasn't anyone else." He countered, his words tinged with a hint of desperation.
"Remus." His name hung in the air, heavy with frustration. You sent him with a glare heavy with irritation, and the intensity of your gaze churned a nauseating knot in his stomach.
"I was jealous, okay? To see Sirius hold you and kiss you like I have always wanted was awful. I couldnât get you out of my head, and then Dorcas asked, and I just said your name."
"Godric, Rem!" You huffed, frustration coloring your tone. "If you had just told me months ago, we couldâve avoided this entire mess." Remus opened his mouth to speak, but you interjected, your words tumbling out with raw emotion. "But at the same time? Iâm so grateful that you didnât tell me, and that Sirius was there, because then I wouldâve missed out on a guy who was never afraid to show me that I was his first choice.â
Remus remained silent, his gaze fixed intently on his intertwined fingers. You sat tense on the couch beside him, the air heavy with unresolved tension.
Remusâ eyes are filled with tears when he turns to you, âI know thereâs no chance for us anymore, but Y/n, I donât want to lose you as my best friend. Not having you around the last couple months have been hard. I miss you, and I understand if youâre not ready for that or donât even want to be my friend. But Y/n, I will do anything to make this up to you.â
 You felt a lump form in your throat, a wave of emotions threatening to overwhelm you. With a harsh sigh, you turned to Remus, your gaze a mixture of hurt and determination.
"Our friendship won't be fixed right away," you admitted, the words weighted with the frustration that had been simmering beneath the surface. "I'm still frustrated with you." You confessed, your voice tinged with the raw honesty of your emotions.
âY/n, Iâll do everything to make it up to you. I know everything wonât go back to the way it was, but I just want to be your friend.â His words carry genuine remorse, and you crack.
âRemus, come here.â You extended your arms toward him and Remus engulfs you in his embrace, his fervor nearly knocking you off balance.
You're both holding onto each other tightly, finding comfort in having each other back. A few tears escape your eyes, tracing silent paths down your cheeks as you find solace in the warmth of his embrace.
"I missed you too." You mumble softly into his chest, your words muffled by the fabric of his shirt.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
The familiar ease you once shared with Remus doesn't return immediately, but both of you are committed to rebuilding your friendship, to rediscovering that ease and comfort your relationship used to provide. But the effort that is being made means the world to you.Â
And so it begins with catching up on reading together. You sit beside Remus on the plush couch, matching copies of a book cradled in your hands as you both immerse yourselves in its pages. Nearby, Marlene and Lily are nestled by the crackling fire, engaged in animated conversation about Marlene's impending decision to finally ask Dorcas out. Peter lounges lazily in an armchair, a contented smile playing on his lips as he indulges in chocolates, his attention drifting between the gossip and the flickering flames.
Sirius's laughter rings out, drawing your gaze toward him like a magnet. You shift your focus to the common room entrance, where Sirius and James have just arrived, their hair still damp from their post-practice showers.
You sit up straighter, a subtle movement, that draws Remus's attention to you. Following your gaze, Remus's eyes shift in the direction of Sirius, who is in the midst of a hearty laugh spurred on by James's joke. However, as Sirius turns and locks eyes with you, his laughter fades into a tender smile, his expression melting into one of affection and adoration. James catches sight of Lily across the room and wastes no time in making his way over to her, his trademark mischievous grin already in place.
"James!" Lily cries out, her voice a mixture of exasperation and amusement, as she dodges away from the curly-headed boy who is shaking his dripping wet hair over her. Marlene's laughter fills the air, and Dorcas grins from beside her. Despite Lily's attempts to escape, James encircles his arms around her waist, drawing her back against his chest, his satifsfied grin matching her infectious laughter.Â
âI canât stand you, James Potter.â Lily sighs, leaning back against James and shaking her head disapprovingly.
Sirius laughs, watching Lily pretend to be annoyed with James, before settling into the seat beside you, a comfortable familiarity enveloping the space between you. When he leans in to press a gentle kiss against your lips, you instinctively lean into his touch, savoring the warmth of his affection. Remus's gaze momentarily drifts away, a subtle pang of jealousy tugging at his chest as he watches the way you lean into his best mate.
In truth, Remus found himself uncertain of his standing with Sirius. Him and Remus were limited in their interactions lately, both boys feeling tense around the other. Unbeknownst to you, Remus flinched involuntarily every time Sirius drew near to you, displaying his lingering feelings for you. Sirius, though not proud of it, found himself grappling with a twinge of possessiveness whenever Remus was close to you.Â
Sirius pulled back slightly, a warm smile gracing his features as he met your gaze, "Hi, m'love." He murmured softly, his voice laced with affection and tenderness.
You couldn't help but return his grin, feeling a rush of warmth at his endearing greeting, "Hi." You replied, your voice filled with warmth and fondness, mirroring the affection reflected in his eyes.
"What are you doing tomorrow?" Sirius's voice broke the silence, his arm casually draping around your shoulder, drawing you into his side. Your book lay forgotten as his presence captivated your attention.
"Just some studying." You replied, the thought of books and lectures suddenly fading into insignificance.
Sirius leaned in closer, his lips grazing against your ear as he whispered, "I wanna take you somewhere tomorrow." The words stirred memories of a few months ago when you were seated on this very couch with him, grappling with the heartache of trying to move on from Remus.
"Will this be a date?" You asked, unable to contain the excitement bubbling in your voice.
"Yes, angel." Sirius replied, his words soft and tender as he pressed a gentle kiss to your temple. A radiant grin spread across your face as you reached for your book once more, the anticipation of the upcoming date dancing in your thoughts.
.·ă.·ăâ·.·â«Â·ă·ă.
Almost a week slips by before you and Sirius manage to carve out time for a long-awaited date. As Sirius leads you on a walk, your heart swells with emotion when you realize he's taking you to the tulip field. Despite the lingering chill in the air, the sight of the vibrant flowers and the sun's gentle rays reflecting off Black Lake fills you with warmth.
"You're such a romantic." You giggle, leaning into Sirius even more. He responds with a bashful smile, his cheeks tinged pink. You're not sure if it's from the cold or your teasing.
"I didn't know if it would be a good place for a date or not." He admits, his cheeks coloring with embarrassment. He had spent the last week agonizing over where to take you. When he ranted to Peter about it, Peter simply shrugged and suggested Hogsmeade. Sirius had scoffed, his tone teasing yet earnest, telling him he better step it up if he wanted to impress a girl.
"Sirius, this is the cutest spot for a date. Plus, it has meaning to us." You tell him sincerely, and Sirius feels his heart flutter at the term us. He wonders if he'll ever get over the fact that he has his dream girl in his arms, looking at him the same way he looks at you.
As you draw closer, the perfumed air carries the unmistakable scent of spring, and the gentle buzzing of bumblebees near the flowers fills your ears. The sounds evoke a sense of nostalgia, transporting you back to your childhood days spent playing in the garden.
"Merlin, I was so stressed about it. I've never planned a date before. I mean, I've gone on dates, but I've never felt this determined to impress someone as much as I have with you," he sighs as if releasing all of his pent-up stress. "I even asked Peter where I should take you."
"Did you? Well, I think this is perfect." You grin, withdrawing your hand from his to lay out the blanket. The thought of crushing tulips under the blanket makes you cringe, so you search for a barren patch to place it over. With care, you shake out the blanket, letting it flutter gracefully before plopping onto it.
Leaning back on your palms, you watch Sirius, who remains standing where you left him, your copy of Pride and Prejudice in his hands. A soft smile graces his lips as he gazes at you as if you're everything he's ever dreamed of.
"Are you going to join me or just stare?" You question, patting the spot next to you invitingly.
"I quite like staring at you." He grins, sending you his famous smile.Â
He sits down next to you before laying back and allowing the sun to settle on his skin. The warmth of the rays feels comforting, especially after the last couple of days filled with rain. The melodic songs of birds in the surrounding trees and the sound of your gentle movements create a soothing ambiance, putting him at ease.
You shift, settling onto your back, your eyes tracing the patterns of the soft clouds as they leisurely drift across the vast expanse of the sky. The birds' playful chirps and flutters among the trees add to the serene atmosphere. Sirius follows suit, adjusting his position to face you. As he watches you, he's captivated by the delicate play of sunlight on your features, accentuated by the colorful tulips that bloom around you, adding a vibrant backdrop to the tranquil scene.
He can hardly believe that he's lying next to the girl of his dreams, the one he's thought of for years, yearning for even a moment of her attention. Memories flood back countless times when he watched you with Remus from afar, consumed by jealousy for the time Remus got to spend with you. He would have given anything for just a few minutes alone with you to share a moment that belonged solely to the two of you.
"I talked to Remus earlier today." You remark, his nose crinkling slightly with an involuntary pang of jealousy at the mention of his friend's name. It's become almost instinctual by now.Â
"He apologized to Adeline," You start, your expression thoughtful. "He mentioned it started off rough, but in the end, she forgave him, and they wished each other the best."
He hums, âThatâs good.â
You giggle, âThatâs all?â
Sirius hums softly, propping himself up on his elbow as he gazes down at you. "I'm glad they've found that closure," he murmurs, his tone laced with a hint of distraction.
Feeling his unwavering focus, you gently divert your attention from the sky to meet his gaze. His eyes are locked onto yours with such intensity that it causes a flutter in your chest, leaving your breath caught in your throat.Â
He lifts his hands, delicately brushing his thumb against your bottom lip. A small, involuntary sound escapes you, and Sirius responds with a devastating smile, a hint of playfulness dancing in his eyes.
"I don't want to talk about anyone else but us." He whispers, his voice filled with sincerity. His gaze softens as his fingers trace gently across your cheeks, his hand coming to rest on your face, his thumb tenderly brushing against your jawline.
"What about us in particular?" You inquire, the words escaping in a breathless whisper. Your heart quickens its pace, a rhythmic drumming echoing the intensity of the moment, a sensation that always accompanies Sirius's proximity. The air feels charged with anticipation, every nerve tingling with the electricity of his presence.
"I can't get enough of you," he confesses, leaning in to press a soft kiss against your cheek. "How you never leave my mind," he adds, tenderly planting a kiss on your other cheek.
"How you make my heart flip every time I look at you." His lips brush against your forehead before he leans down to rest his against yours. Your eyes flutter closed at his proximity, your body nearly buzzing from the giddiness and anticipation coursing through your veins.
"How my heart is entirely yours." His voice trembles slightly, revealing the depth of his emotions as he utters those heartfelt words, âAnd that I am hopelessly in love with you.â
Your eyes widen, catching his apprehensive gaze, his nerves evident as he awaits your reaction to his confession Without hesitation, you thread your fingers through his hair and gently pull him down to you, closing the distance between your lips and his in a sweet, affirming kiss.
Sirius lets out a moan, his thumb continuing to brush over your cheek as he deepens the kiss. The warmth of his lips against yours is accompanied by a gentle exploration, each movement conveying a depth of emotion and desire that leaves you breathless. The air is charged with an electric intensity, and in that moment, it feels like time stands still, allowing you to savor the overwhelming connection and longing between you.
You pull away just slightly, your voice trembling with emotion as you gaze into his eyes. In the hushed intimacy of the moment, surrounded by the soft rustle of leaves and the distant chirping of birds, you utter those three profound words, "I am so in love with you. "
Sirius lets out a disbelieving laugh, his smile widening as euphoria bubbles within him. Without hesitation, he leans in, his lips meeting yours in a fervent and intense kiss that elicits a desperate moan from your lips. You've never experienced a kiss like this before, filled with such raw passion that it feels like every nerve in your body is set ablaze as if you could melt into him right there and then.
"Please be mine." Sirius pleads, his voice laced with longing and vulnerability against your lips.Â
A tender smile graces your lips as you respond, your voice soft and filled with affection, "I'm already yours."
While nestled in the field of tulips, Sirius confesses to you that the very first tulip he gifted you was, in fact, a declaration of his love.