aprés moi, le déluge

nsfw/vent blog for @subjectivemortality // untagged 18+ //findable/followable IC // able to see private tagged posts: - ssunspotted (Tolya) - avangelical (Ava)

[royalarmyofoz]

stephanie sarley

[subjectivecarnality]

even if it isn't for me per se, it is nice for a secondhand feeling

[subjectivecarnality]

@ssunspoiled you do feel like you're buzzing ✨️ I could use you like a vibrator at this rate

what's making you so excited, beautiful?

[ssunspoiled]

✨️ Sunlight~ IIm jus t, feeling, and feeling and feeling and iits getting difficult to be quiet hahah

[subjectivecarnality]

🌻☀️🌻☀️🌻

so scream it, your feelings are beautiful and should be heard 💖 It's nice to hear it again, your poetry

[subjectivecarnality]

@ssunspoiled you do feel like you're buzzing ✨️ I could use you like a vibrator at this rate

what's making you so excited, beautiful?

[yuri-sandwich]

like i know it’s not actually a permanent solution but like …………. i do think being kissed on my neck and told that i’m pretty could fix me

[ravens-a-whore3]

ugh need to hear the most detailed, in depth description of how you want to breed me

[flutterbvnny]

i’m serious i need sexually violent things to happen to me immediately

[flutterbvnny]

i’m serious i need sexually violent things to happen to me immediately

[flutterbvnny]

i’m serious i need sexually violent things to happen to me immediately

[bratw1fe]

do not interact if u wouldn’t keep fucking me after making me pass out

[ssunspotted]

I think about how you died, how you will die, how you might die. Constantly, and only partly because I can't help it. It's easier than it used to be, because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you'll always come back to me. We'll come back to each other

I've been thinking about what I'll be giving you as an engagement present 💖 And about traditions. About wardrobe, maybe colors.

Do you know how important you make me feel, that Then is still worth rremembering? That that would be worth a memorial? That the future is worth planning even when its frightening? I felt so in the way,for so long. That when I slowed down, it stopped being worth even acknowledging for people I thought it would matter to.But you.But you, you would have burnt a ttrail through time to be there,if you only could have. The time has been carved out ,and still I know ever piece of it matters. Hasnt dulled down. That is everything to me.

Ohh, dont get me started on traditions and wardrobe and colors Ill want to pick your brain until all the surprise is chewed up!! But. Coordinating colors.....

[subjectivemortality]

I would still rip through time itself to have made you feel less alone, then. You deserved to be surrounded by love, the same way you would be the love surrounding anyone else if positions were reversed. I want it to be memorialized because it was important, you are important, just like I want to celebrate everything you've become since and everything you'll be from here out 💖

Tolya, I have entire moodboards in my head ready to be put to work. Just say the word and I'll break out the scissors, gluesticks, and stacks of magazines - we may have to clear out some of my office for a brainstorm night

[ssunspoiled]

Its all the air in the world suddenly in my lungs to know that that thing, is worth loving even past tense.

Memorials have been so important my entire .existence, and I keep finding out again with evvery new part of me hhaha how much it matters to .us, it.

Still.again.will matter.again, again

You, with me in all of it makes even the memory less lonely

Mm.now that its sunny, do you think your office ? Or spread out in tthe sunroom 💛

[subjectivecarnality]

Who am I if not someone who holds the memories of the dead? I may not have been there to collect it, those violent and peaceful last moments, but I'll spend the rest of my life taking in everything about you, grieving and celebrating. Memorials are important, especially when we're paying respects to a version of ourself that died so that we could become

I've died too many times to count, some who were grieved and some who were forgotten quickly or never missed at all. Some I don't remember being, with all these holes in me. It's comforting to know that the earth remembers, even if I don't. That me returned to the soil to feed it, and whatever impact they left on me was a brick in the road that led here, however overlooked. You matter, it matters. Immutable facts can't be determined on an individual level or seen only ttthrouugh one set of eyes. Or, many seets of eyes attached to one very astute mind 💖

The sun room, definitely. My office is full of paintings right now anyway, I'm still stuck on all those pastel transparencies and wispy things

[hanniballecterscock]

do you want to play on the vivisection table with me after work

[angelexile]

need that man growling in my ear as he rails me from behind

[angelexile]

need that man growling in my ear as he rails me from behind

[konketsu]

dont care if i sound corny or cliche but to love and be loved back and not having to second guess where u stand in someones heart is such a warm and safe feeling & everyone should have the luxury and pleasure of having it always

[borrowed-thoughts]

@korinawray on instagram

[chewupmyheart]