tw // mental health , mention of suicidal thoughts , suicidality , ocd
it's my birthday! i'm 25 today. two years ago, i didn't celebrate my birthday because my mental illnesses convinced me that if my worst fears were true, then it would make me such a horrible, bad, and unforgivable person that i didn't deserve to be alive, let alone celebrate my birthday.
my seriously dark thought patterns only lasted a week or two, but it felt like an eternity, and it took me months and months of therapy to develop healthier thinking patterns overall.
i ended up having undiagnosed OCD (and anxiety and maybe depression (?)) that i have been working on since.
anyways. i just wanted to put this out there because. you deserve to be here. and you deserve good things. you deserve to celebrate your birthday. and please, if you are really struggling, talk to someone, or make an appointment with a mental health specialist. i don't even want to think about where i would be if i hadn't opened up to anyone.
anyways. i don't really know why i'm writing this. because it's important maybe? because i've never really typed it out before? i'm a little nervous. but alas. you deserve to be here <3