A powerful line that defines not just Yui herself, but the Oregairu series as a whole. In a story with characters written so skillfully, so rich with nuance and life, it should not have surprised me how much I fell in love with Yui Yuigahama in particular.
Through all the highs and lows, the laughter and even the tears, Yui doesn’t care, she wants it all. In this piece, I will breakdown and analyze the meaning behind Yui’s definitive line, and the significance of Yui’s character and her ending in the overall narrative of Oregairu.
I hope you enjoy reading!
There will be spoilers ahead.
“I want it all.” Yui utters this line several times throughout the series. It refers to her desire to keep everything she values without sacrificing anything. She wants her friendship with Yukino to be everlasting. She wants to love and in turn be loved by Hachiman. And she wants the Service Club, the place she created her happiest memories, to continue on forever with the three of them always smiling. She wants to keep believing she is a good friend and a good person. All of these desires, sadly, are mutually exclusive to the others. To be friends with Yukino means she must never confess her feelings for Hachiman, who Yukino is also in love with. To be with Hachiman, she risks destabilizing her friendship with him, and will knowingly hurt Yukino. For the club to keep going, she must stay silent and smile while crying tears no one can ever be allowed to see. She must swallow her sadness and resentment, fake her friendships and, in turn, surrender ever truly winning.
When Yui says she “wants it all,” it is always laced in a self-critical tone and she describes herself as “selfish” for wanting so. However, the state of selfishness is not inherently a negative or evil motivation. Selfishness is the desire to seek one’s own happiness, to believe you have the right to be happy. It is context that brings about the negativity. In this case, it is awareness that one’s selfishness comes at the cost of others. In this sense, Yui comes across as extremely human and I think relatable to many real people.
I think back on the Yui who stumbled into the Service Club room, asking Yukino and Hachiman to teach her to bake, too embarrassed to admit it to her other, popular friends. She would never risk harming how others perceive her, too embarrassed to ever admit her desires and insecurities. Too afraid to risk her friendships. Now, she has things she desires so badly that it kills her. She wants so badly to win. She tries time and time again to find the courage to commit herself one way or another because she knows complete stagnation means she definitely loses, but her gentle heart struggles to budge.
When faced with a conundrum, Yui always places the feelings of her friends before her own, and as Hachiman and Yukino slowly learn from her and open their hearts, they realize they have taken on this conflict as well. For so long, the two have built walls high to protect themselves, never letting anyone in because, as Hiratsuka-sensei put it, when you let others in, you let in pain as well. It is because of Yui that Hachiman and Yukino learn what it means to desire something, to “want it all,” and what it will cost them. Without Yui, neither of them could ever have gained the will to take their first steps forward.
At the series conclusion, Yui risks it all on a chance to love Hachiman, but he turns her down, realizing his feelings for Yukino. In the end, Yui finds her way back to the Service Club, finally laying all her desires bare for her friends. She STILL wants to be friends with Yukino. She STILL wants to be in the Service Club. And yes, she still loves Hachiman, deep down in her heart. The three friends, finally with everything on display, finally genuine, can now begin to understand one another, and finally move forward together as the curtain close.
So does Yui get it all in the end? Unfortunately, no. But the morale of Yui’s story is that happiness is something that sometimes costs you, and you can’t always have it all. However, you may be able to at least get the most important things, and that requires you put yourself on the line, or you may walk away with nothing. Yui’s story is about being courageous and honest, while never losing sight of your heart. Believing that even if friends don’t understand each other today, or the next day, or the day after... someday we will if we never give up trying.
Thank you for reading this far! I’ve been feverishly following the story of Oregairu since the anime began 7 long years ago after it captured my heart with its beautiful and heartfelt take on awkward high school romance and friendship. I can confidently say I consider its story and characters the best in its genre. I knew I had to honor Yui somehow as I decided to write this short piece. She may not have won, but in the end I think she still found a way to be a winner, and as an anime fan, I think it was a profound journey I’ll always keep near and dear to me.
So I wrote my whole analysis on Felix’s negative character development in Crimson Flower, during which I briefly touched on the reasons all the other units have for joining her. However, I didn’t go in-depth, so I’m gonna do that now.
As with the other post: this isn’t a post supporting or denouncing the Crimson Flower route. It’s merely an analysis. Additionally, I’m not looking to get into arguments about how ‘in-character’ any one unit’s decision to join is. I may briefly touch on if a unit has what I consider to be a weak reasoning (as some of these are definitely more thought-out than others) but I’m not seeking to start arguments. Everyone has their own headcanons and justifications for why units join but I’m going to be dealing solely in canon text here.
FE: Three Houses - Hypothetical Battle Conversations
If there’s one thing I will sing compliments to high heavens for, it is Three Houses’ impeccable character relations and writing! We are treated to some really great battle conversations, but there were a few I noticed weren’t lucky enough to make it into the final game. Here are my ideas for a few hypothetical battle conversations. Spoilers below. I might update a few more as I get inspired.
Crimson Flower
Chapter 17
Sylvain vs. Dimitri
Sylvain: “Your Highness... “
Dimitri: “Sylvain, you’ve turned your blade on country and friend alike.”
Sylvain: “All my life, I’ve sat and done nothing but wallow and curse this twisted world... Everything I’ve done-”
Dimitri: “Not another word. Your hands are red with the blood of your countrymen. You are a traitor... and it is a king’s duty to carry out the sentence!”
Ingrid vs. Dimtri
Dimitri: “Ingrid. Your father... he worries a great deal for you. Those convictions you’ve held so close... have you abandoned them?”
Ingrid: “Not a day goes by that I do not think of father. And no, I have not. I stand here before you now because of my convictions!”
Dimtri: “Then that is all there is. Come, enemy of Faerghus. Out of respect for your father, I will grant you a swift end myself.”
Ingrid: “Thank you, your Highness.”
Chapter 14
Lorenz vs. Claude
Claude: “Well, well! Fancy seeing you at Miss Emperor’s beck and call!”
Lorenz: “Hardly. We both knew this day would come. Know that I take no pleasure in this. I am just acting in the best interest of the Alliance. Throw down your bow, Claude. You need to think of your people.”
Claude: “Sorry, Lorenz. I can’t throw in the towel just yet. You know, we never saw eye to eye, but I always knew you had what it takes to lead. If people like you are around, I’ll feel at ease when I’m gone.”
Lorenz: “When you’re gone...? What are you plotting?”
Azure Moon/Verdant Wind
Chapter 17
Ferdinand vs. Edelgard
Ferdinand: “Edelgard! I shall be your opponent!”
Edelgard: “It’s been a while, Ferdinand. So, you’ve chosen to raise your blade against the Adrestian Empire?”
Ferdinand: “I have not chosen to oppose the empire. Rather, I oppose the bloodshed and heartache you’ve inflicted on Fódlan!”
Edelgard: “You could have stood at my side and helped me lead Fódlan into a brighter tomorrow. Instead, you will die a nameless death here.”
Petra vs. Edelgard
Edelgard: “It saddens me that this is where your chosen path has led you, Petra.”
Petra: “Edelgard... you have showed me kindness. I have true gratitude for you. However, Brigid will stand no longer for Adrestia’s rule. I will stand against you!”
Edelgard: “Then so be it. Princess of Brigid! As emperor of Adrestia, I will strike you down!”
Verdant Wind
Chapter 20
Dedue vs. Edelgard
Edelgard: “So you lived?”
Dedue: “His Highness demanded your head. If it’s the last thing I do, I will deliver it to him.”
Edelgard: “Then you’ve come all this way to die. A mindless dog, as rabid as his master.”
[image 1 is a drawing of edelgard in modern dress walking two dogs, one a smirking, sinister, skeletal black hound and the other a grinning orange collie. image 2 is a drawing of claude in modern dress, sprawled on the ground with two sighthounds sitting by him; a pink saluki with pigtail-like ears, and a smug-looking purple afghan hound. image 3 is a drawing of dimitri in modern dress, holding the leash to a patient-looking white malamute with one hand, and clutching the leash to a boisterous orange hound in the other; the orange hound is grinning and tugging toward a hissing, yowling black cat.]
Negative Character Development: Felix in Crimson Flower
I said on Discord at 3 am that I’d write this and I’m going to.
First: this is not an argument for or against supporting the Crimson Flower route. This is merely an analysis on how and why Felix joins Edelgard’s cause and how it negatively impacts him, personally. Any dialogue I make alluding to Edelgard being in the wrong or being ‘a monster’ (actual words used at one point in here) are written with the intention that it’s Felix’s internal thought processes, not my own views. I’m not interested in starting discourse on this post. I’ll block you if you try.
Second: note that when I say ‘negative character development,’ I don’t mean character development that’s bad. It’s still developing the character. It just doesn’t develop them in a positive way. Dimitri also undergoes negative character development throughout the school phase, setting him up for his positive development arc in the war phase. As for Felix, his negative development (which he suffers on all non-AM routes, really, but is more pronounced on Crimson Flower) is to compare and contrast his positive development on Azure Moon. The negative development is part of why his non-AM endings differ from his AM endings.
With that out of the way, let’s jump right into it. Spoilers for all routes but mostly Crimson Flower (obviously).
I just want to remind everyone to talk to Gatekeeper-kun EVERY CHANCE YOU GET. He stands at the entrance near the marketplace and gives commentary about what he’s up to while Byleth is saving the damn continent. He’s seriously the unsung, unappreciated hero of Three Houses.
Also, apparently, he’s voiced by Kyle McCarley, aka Alm. And that’s hilarious.
Favorite part about Three Houses so far are the little details they put into character positioning and interactions you can observe while walking around the monastery. The developers clearly put a lot of thought and care into how they set up everyone.
Where is Leonie? Why, talking to Jeralt of course!
Dedue is always looming a few feet behind Dimitri where ever he goes.
Annette loves to cook so she’s hanging around the cafeteria.
The genuine care makes for a very nice touch in bringing the world to life.
Anyone else noticing how the Blue Lions have such a strong fellowship amongst them? Dimitri is the leader, Dedue is his loyal guard, Felix is Dimitri’s best friend and rival, Sylvain is the big brotherly figure to the gang, Ingrid is Dimitri, Felix AND Sylvain’s childhood friend, Annette and Mercedes are best friends with nicknames for each other. Blue Lions is seriously looking like #squadgoals.
Contrast the Black Eagles which has Edelgard as leader with Hubert as her right hand and Ferdinand as her rival, but everyone else are kind of just meeting each other. Caspar and Linhardt seem to get along, but that’s about it. And the Golden Deer has almost no established relationships going in, with Claude just leading a breakfast club of oddballs and misfits.
I quite like that the cultures and interrelationships amongst the three houses are all very clearly different from each other. It will make for very different experiences depending on the house the player involves themself with.
