odds and ends

I'm an adult, I promise

[senatorgana]

let us always find each other.

[daenystormborn]

I haven’t taken anything seriously since 1918

[radiophile]

[sw-edit]

[markantonys]

goodbye, old friend. may the force be with you.

[aleclightwoodisgay]

shadowhunters + gay text posts (jace edition) (10/?)

[rochastocade]

lesbian cartoon crush starter kit

[interspacing]

Janet (of Tam Lin fame) is a sass master. One day I will play a Changeling concept based on this boss woman. “Oh Father, if I go with child, this much to you I tell: There’s none among your gentlemen that I would treat so well. And Father, if I go with child, I must bare the blame: There’s none among your gentleman shall give the babe his name.”

[gerriceo]

i love carrie fisher

[ariml]

I see a very careful man, who professes to be cynical in the face of mysteries he can’t explain, and claims to have no passions in spite of a heart that runs as deep as the Pacific Ocean.

[herhmione]

listen… harry potter is the most savage person in the entire series like this kid decimates people with one comeback can you imagine james potter would have been so proud like

“they stuff people’s heads down the toilet the first day at stonewall. want to come upstairs and practice?” "no, thanks. the poor toilet’s never had anything as horrible as your head down it – it might be sick.” fucking eleven year old harry!! already a lil mini savage!!!!!

“listening to the news! again?“ "well, it changes every day, you see” my boy!!! mouthing off to the dursleys!! who gives a fuck?? not harry potter

“’congratulations, harry! i wonder if you could give me a quick word? how you felt facing that dragon? how do you feel now about the fairness of the scoring?’ ‘yeah, you can have a word,’ said harry savagely. ‘goodbye!’” holy fuck!! when harry potter literally does not give a shit anymore and jk rowling knows it and literally!!! canonically!!! makes him a savage harry is literally savage it says it right there in the goblet of fire

“it’s time you learned some respect!” “it’s time you earned it.” mouthing off to the minister of magic damn harry authority who????? what??? respecting your elders??? harry doesn’t give a shit!!!!

“sure you can manage that broom, potter? got plenty of special features, hasn’t it? shame it doesn’t come with a parachute - in case you get too near a dementor.“  “pity you can’t attach an extra arm to yours, malfoy, then it could catch the snitch for you.” oh shit!!!! legit how many times do u think malfoy literally cried to his dad because harry burned him!!!! where’s the aloe vera!!!!

“yes, sir.“ "there’s no need to call me ‘sir’ professor.” oh fucking shit!!!! did you think i was gonna forget this!!! the holy grail of harry being savage as fuck oh my god!!!! james potter is fucking cheering in heaven!!!! he made a cake to commemorate this moment!!!! three years later lily’s chillin and james comes up and he’s like “holy fuck lil remember that one time harry was like ‘no need to call me sir professor’ and snape like flipped shit!!! that was fucking awesome” and lily is like “shut the fuck up we get it your son is a savage”

[gael-garcia]

“I feel like boxing is very much like acting, except you’re just fighting yourself. You’re not allowing yourself to be defeated, you’re getting up after you’ve been knocked down, and you have to believe that you can win.” — Gina Rodriguez for Women’s Health Magazine, May 2016

[lizziesolsen-deactivated2017060]

Again the smile or snarl from his Master. “You were a traitor, were you not, Lord Vader?” Vader’s breathing caught on the hook of sudden anger. “What did you say?” “To the Jedi. To Padmé. To Obi-Wan. To all those you loved.” His Master turned to look at him, his eyes reflecting the flames. Vader didn’t know the answer his Master wanted to hear, so he simply answered the truth. “Yes”. -Lords of the Sith by Paul S. Kemp

[fuks]

[demelzahcarne]

Nadiya - Winner of The Great British Bake Off 2015

[swearbyallflowers]

what she says: I'm fine

what she means: What the fuck kind of custody arrangement does The Parent Trap family have? Whose idea was it to take one kid each and never speak to each other again? Never even tell the daughter they're raising that they're a twin? Nobody hates their ex-spouse that much, and if you do you definitely don't want that person raising one of your kids. Why are the extended family and friends going along with this? Were they sworn to secrecy? Why? How did they choose who would take which twin? Did they both just have a clear favorite? How do you not eat yourself alive with guilt over a decision like that? Why did they make it in the first place? Did a judge make the decision? Who the fuck was THAT guy? Either the family in The Parent Trap have some incredibly dark secrets that weren't explored in the movies (original or remake) or they're the worst "good" parents in fictional family history.

[emilysidhe]

Fanfiction Written By Young People

Freelance worker lives in huge, gorgeous house/apartment in expensive area despite never seeming to be working

Characters work 8-5 office job with hour-long commute, but go to bed no earlier than midnight and get up in time for morning sex and long, leisurely cooked breakfasts every day

Do these characters even have jobs?

Single parent has way more communication with child’s teacher than is normal; leads to dating; administration somehow has no problem with this.

“I know I could never afford this mansion, but it’s OK I inherited it.  No, paying property taxes isn’t difficult on my salary.  I don’t even know how much the place is worth.  Are property taxes a thing?”

There are two levels of cooking skills:  gourmet food every time no recipe, and sets pot of boiling water on fire somehow.  No one is ever in between these two skill sets.  People on each level always end up dating each other.

Despite the gourmet meals described needing like seven pots to cook, no one ever does dishes.

Character shares a bottle of wine with their date (2 and half glasses each), and they both get falling-down drunk.

Later, one of them drinks an entire bottle of whiskey by themselves and does not die.

[lifeineroticapublishing]

Oh my god

[ladyjanelly]

Every single person in a group of college friends falls in love with another one of the group. All the relationships last. Everyone is part of everyone else’s wedding party.