Intro to Remus Lupin:
Chocolate, cable-knit sweaters, bruised skin, bandages, healing potions, mugs of tea, sugar, old books, dog-eared pages, annotations in the margins, raised scars, chewed fingernails, dark circles under the eyes, tousled hair, nightmares, sharing blankets, holding hands…
TW: animal attacks, childhood trauma, terminal illness, parental illness Aesthetics: Chocolate, cable-knit sweaters, bruised skin, bandages, healing potions, mugs of tea, sugar, old books, dog-eared pages, annotations in the margins, raised scars, chewed fingernails, dark circles under the eyes, tousled hair, nightmares, sharing blankets, holding hands… Name: Remus John Lupin Age: 21 years old Birthday: 10/03/1960 Former House: Gryffindor Graduation Year: 1978 Wand: Unicorn hair, Cypress, 10 ¼ inches, and fairly flexible. Occupation: Unemployed
Current Circumstance: Remus joined the order knowing full well that his condition could be used to the advantage of the movement. This was due to a conversation with Dumbledore prior to his graduation. Although the implication of meeting feral wolves and potentially having to affiliate with them terrified him to his core, he felt as though he owed Dumbledore more than he could ever pay him back and he signed himself up without hesitation. This dire need to please Albus is still buried deeply within his sub-conscious. He blindly followed the man, almost child-like in his conviction that he can do no wrong. Like many of Dumbledore’s followers, he very rarely questioned him, believing he absolutely knew best.
It was only after months of living with the werewolves, and being forced to pledge loyalty to the man who had maliciously attacked him as a child, that Remus temporarily removed his rose-coloured glasses. Greyback and his pack live rough, squatting or camping with no equipment, often in abandoned or near uninhabitable spaces. They are aggressive, blood-thirsty, violent individuals, the complete opposite of Remus. He had to do some terrible things to earn their trust. Forced to sacrifice all of his favourite creature comforts, things like tea, books, and chocolate were out of reach. These were the things he used, and still uses, to ground himself. To remind himself that, despite everything, he is Human. The first time he was forced to eat raw meat with the other wolves it took every ounce of his willpower to stomach it. Not because he didn’t enjoy the taste but because he did.
During a meeting with Dumbledore, in which he was expected to communicate plans, names, and dates to recite back to the Order, Remus found himself sitting in the familiar office, his head in his hands, completely and utterly broken. His mental health had taken an incredible dive and, despite telling himself repeatedly that this mission, alongside being trusted to take it on, was an honour, he begged for permission to stay in the Wizarding world. He was honest, confiding in Albus, admitting to feeling like an animal, like he might be losing himself to what he was. He also talked about how distant he was beginning to feel from his friends. Albus was kind and understanding but made it very clear to Remus that the Order needed him. It had to be him, he had to be strong enough. Remus steeled himself, realising he didn’t have a choice in the matter, and agreed, leaving with a newfound determination that did nothing to dispel the hollow feeling in his chest and subsequent emotional exhaustion. For the first time in his life, he felt a spark of resentment for the man he admired above all.
Doubts began to creep in, and he found him considering whether Dumbledore would have asked him to return to Greyback if he saw him as Remus and not as a werewolf. Whenever he was forced to do something terrible, or he felt something inside him break, the anger that used to be directed at Greyback, was suddenly directed at Dumbledore. And then the attack happened. Peter Pettigrew was outed as a spy and Remus felt his entire world beginning to crumble. He began to convince himself that if he had been more present, if he hadn’t spent so much time isolated from the people he loved, maybe he would have noticed something was wrong. Maybe he could have saved Sirius from the trauma of confronting him alone.
Taking a break from his mission at Dumbledore’s unexpected behest, as he Order withdraws from the public eye and continues its work underground, Remus is currently living in a small one bedroom flat, situated in the heart of London. His parents were quick to welcome him home but his mother, Hope, is incredibly ill. He refuses to burden his parents with his own illness so when a friend of his father’s, travelling to escape London’s heavy atmosphere, offered up her apartment, he accepted the offer, incredibly grateful. Whenever he makes a little money, he sends some to her, appreciative of her kindness despite believing if she discovered his condition she would be disgusted by the fact that he had even set foot inside of her home.
Additional Information: He perfected the Patronus charm at the considerably young age of 13 after learning about Dementors in DADA. He became obsessed with the idea of running into one someday. Knowing he had more darkness in his life than most students his age, he was convinced he would be overpowered and lose his soul. He knew he would only be able to conquer his fear by mastering the Patronus Charm and spent months hard at work until he was finally successful. That being said, he only conjures a corporeal Patronus in front of friends, ashamed, and embarrassed by the shape it takes. He is very good at protection spells. Remus prefers defensive spells purely because he feels as though if he attacks first he is succumbing to the monster hiding just below the surface of his skin. He is beyond terrible at potions, overwhelmed by the scents of the ingredients. The scar from Fenrir’s bite is on his left shoulder and he does everything he can to ensure nobody sees it. When he is nervous or scared he reaches under the collar of his shirt to press his hand against it, using it as a reminder of how strong and capable he is. It doesn’t calm him down but it helps to steel his resolution. If he is upset, he touches it to punish himself, to remind himself that he isn’t human, that he doesn’t deserve to be happy. Remus is terrified of being asked to return to the feral wolves. He’s aware his only true value to the Order of the Phoenix lies in his Lycanthropy. Hope Lupin is sick with a Muggle illness that has been worsening for nearly a year. Remus strongly suspects it is far more serious than his parents are willing to admit, and harbours a lot of guilt, believing he manifested her poor health after using it as a cover for his routine disappearances while at school. Although small, gentle, and quiet, on occasion when things become too much Remus finds himself filled with anger and frustration. During these times he often takes his pain out on his closest friends, the only people to ever see him so unravelled. He still suffers nightmares due to the trauma of his attack. When he was 4, Greyback climbed through his bedroom window, half-transformed, to bite, and infect him. Even at the age of 21, if it is dark outside, he finds it unbearable to be in a room with an open window.











