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@switchbutch
We make our own choices, we pay our own prices.
Bound (1996) —dir. The Wachowskis
Ok so any tips on fucking with a strap on? I'm a switch (but mostly a sub in my last relationship) and I'm not confident being the wearer but I'd like to fuck someone with a strap on. Any tips?
I’m going to answer this educationally, k? The basics: get a harness that is easily adjustable on-the-fly, meaning one handed while you’re doing the business.
1) Lube up your partner’s hole of choice even if they are already wet. Lube always makes things even better and it adheres to skin better than it does to silicone (use water based lube on silicone dicks). Put any remaining lube on your “cock” or get more from the bottle.
2) While entering, use your free hand to guide the head in gently since you can’t feel that kind of detail with your strap-on. Go slow to start. People don’t generally want an aggressive first thrust no matter how they fantasize. Save that for later or try it only after you’ve checked to see if they might like it.
3) Size: If it’s the first time with a new partner and new dick push in slowly and check with them to make sure it isn’t too long or wide for their comfort. If it’s too wide you should spend more time on foreplay and fingers, and if time and arousal doesn’t loosen things up then the dick may be too much for them. If it’s too long (women often don’t like their cervix being pounded, though some do, so ask), then you will have to be careful and use shorter thrusts.
4) Thrusting: don’t pull back too far, you’ll slip out and then likely jab their labia with the next thrust not realizing you’re out, that is, until you get used to feeling what it’s like when you pop out. Usually your partner will tell you anyway. So do half strokes. If the dick is “too long” (see step 3) be even more cautious.
5) Angles: this is the part you have to experiment with as partners will enjoy different positions. See how your partner likes it better/worse as you try tilting your hips forward and downward. If your dick has an upward curve to it, it’s designed to try to hit the g-spot. Tilt your hips under yourself and upward and see what reaction you get. 😈
If they are on their back in missionary position you can hold yourself up with your arms and watch their face for reaction. I personally enjoy laying down on a woman though so the base of the dick and my body rub against her clit. She might then wrap her legs around you to pull you in deeper and accentuate the pressure on her clit.
6) rhythm: this is up to the both of you too. Personally I like to typically go slow with long strokes initially. I personally really enjoy the eroticism and intimacy of this and enjoy watching my partner get more and more worked up sometimes begging me to fuck them harder and faster. Even if they don’t I will usually gradually speed up. Depending on your fitness you can go into “jack rabbit” mode as they near their orgasm (have them touch themselves if they or you want to help with this if cumming is what you’re hoping for). A nice slow fuck can still result in a glorious orgasm too though.
7) The “Don’t Change Anything” Rule! Dear sexy people, when your partner tells you that they are getting close and about to cum DON’T CHANGE ANYTHING THAT YOU ARE DOING! Way too often I’ve had partners (and even seen this in porn) who suddenly changed what they are doing which more often than not results in a that peak feeling going away. If they are saying “yes yes yes” it means don’t change a fucking thing!
That is until you know for sure you’ve got a finishing move that will make them see rainbows 🌈!
MONDAY Women boxing on a roof 1938
Red gloves
Girl Who Love Girls
*pokes head up and looks around*
Remember when Tumblr was interesting and fun?
Ba ha ha ha ha!
joan nestle on butch/femme dynamics in the lesbian almanac compiled by the national museum & archive of lesbian and gay history, 1996