won't you let me be your rhythm tonight?

sydney calhoun Little brother to Sawyer Calhoun, son to Fix-It Felix Jr. and Sergeant Calhoun. Crushing bugs all day isn't exactly my forte, so I was always way easier to find crushing it in Dance Dance Revolution. And I'm lucky, because dancing outside from behind a screen as a senior at Walt High School is even more fun.

[sydneycalhoun]

reeserainbeau:

Nah, man, I don’t even think I can sit through that one, it sounds real heavy. At least I get to hear some song and dance in JCC before he bites the big one. I hadn’t checked it out yet but I heard it’s good, and a second one’s coming out, too. What do they need more land for? Is pig overpopulation going down? You afraid Fairy Godmother’s gonna cut you off if you ask to go back and visit too many times? She gets a little suspicious, but it’s doable.

Oh, a musical? Way more my speed. I’ll have to check it out sometime. I’d suggest a marathon but that seems like a weird movie to pair up with Angry Birds which is already weird by itself; it has the tiny guy from Game of Thrones as one of the many voices in it, did you know that? I don’t think that the pigs need more anything, I think the pigs are just a metaphor for colonialism, but that’s just my take. Oh, and they wanted to eat bird eggs! There was also that! And no, it’s less about being cut off and more of wanting to commit to this human experience, you know? I think it’s treating me really well.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT ✉ KYDNEY

Kale: No, I'm not dating her either! I'm not dating anybody, but I guess the closest is I like, hooked up with Dana a lot of times this year.

Kale: Why would you not use it? You seem like a likeable dude, I'm sure girls like you, too! Or do you like dudes?

Sydney: Ah, hooking up. The great new romances. Do you want to be dating Dana????

Sydney: I mean, I don't think I dislike dudes in that way, but I've only ever really had hard feels for one person, one girl. And I don't think she likes me anymore so. How do you start liking someone new?

[sydneycalhoun]

text 🎮 gameboys

Bailey: SORRY BRO! YOU KNOW I DON'T LIE TO YOU, IF I GOT THOUGHTS, IT'S BETTER TO JUST SHARE THEM!

Bailey: Come on, dude! We've been friends for ages. I'm sorry I'm not good at the whole 'helping you not be bummed anymore' thing but I'm trying here! Would it be better if I just invited you to play videogames as a distraction all the time instead?

Sydney: Even when those thoughts are dickish? It's called empathy, bro. Exercise it once in a while.

Sydney: I get that you're trying but it's making me feel worse so I don't want to be around it, and that's not my fault. Sorry. I don't feel much like gaming. I just need to mope for a while, okay? I get that you don't understand it but can you at least respect it?

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT 🍳 🕺🏿 CALHOUNS

Sawyer: I mean, neither are cottages, nobody in this town lives alone, people could hear you through the walls at any given second! Why did walls feel so much THICKER when we were back in our games? I guess it was just the coding.

Sawyer: Oh, yeah! Cream cheese is much better for pepper jellies, silly, I'm sorry I didn't do a better job of teaching you that.

Sydney: At least you can't SEE through cottage walls. Hearing is one thing, seeing bodies bumping in cars is another. I miss our coding sometimes ;-; do you think I fit in here? I'm starting to doubt it.

Sydney: CREAM CHEESE. Do you have any? I crave it now.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT ✉ SYDANCA

Bianca: You already know the answer to that.

Bianca: It means... I don't know. Another girl would probably be better for you than I ever was.

Sydney: I thought I did.

Sydney: That doesn't matter to me, and it doesn't answer my question. Do you like me anymore? Yes or no?

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT ✉ SYDANCA

Bianca: Kissing's fun. It doesn't have to mean anything.

Bianca: Uh... what? I didn't know anything about that, so they did that all on their own. Not a terrible idea, though.

Sydney: Did it mean anything when we did it?

Sydney: What is that supposed to mean?

[sydneycalhoun]

text 🎮 gameboys

Bailey: And you're sure she wasn't like... faking it? I know acting isn't REALLY her thing, but she's friends with acty people, they could have taught her how to make it convincing. Okay, well Bowie told me I can join in next time so... sorry in advance!

Bailey: People set their bros up on blind dates all the time, it could work! What if you forget I ever said this and we just conveniently introduce you to some cool new people that make you forget Bianca exists?

Sydney: Wow.

Sydney: I don't think I can forget anything you said just now, Bailey, though believe me, I'll be trying to.

Sydney: Just forget I said anything, okay? I was trying to vent and that was clearly a dumb idea. You do your things and I'll do mine and that'll be fine.

[sydneycalhoun]

reeserainbeau:

Guess it doesn’t matter which one, he dies in all of them. But I meant that musical, Jesus Christ Superstar. Maybe that explains why they’re at war in Angry Birds, the pigs are mad that the birds are out here stealing their wings. All these people who say it makes them sick or it starts to taste bad after a while? I can’t imagine what they’re thinking, sounds fake, feels fake.

See, this is why we need clarification, because I totally thought you meant that movie Passion of the Christ which I haven’t seen but which sounds way more dramatic. Have you not seen the Angry Birds movie? You have to, it’s actually kind of cute - the pigs aren’t mad so much as they want more land, it’s basically them trying to go turbo into Bird World. Well, now that I can’t body mod as regularly, eating as sweet as I want is a no go, which is the saddest thing. I miss it, I crave it, and I make do.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT 🍳 🕺🏿 CALHOUNS

Sawyer: I guess I should just appreciate that I get to be special. Don't judge everyone else too harshly, though! Sometimes the back seat of a car's the only privacy you can get.

Sawyer: I can't say that I have perfume bottles lying around so I might not be your girl for making it, sadly. But maybe a bartender around town could help you out? What have you done with peanut butter??

Sydney: Just because I wouldn't be proud doesn't mean I'd think they were gross or something lol. Everybody's into their own thing. I DO have to say though that the back seat of a car isn't much privacy unless the car has, like, curtains or something.

Sydney: Let's just say peanut butter doesn't taste good on absolutely everything. Peanut butter and spicy sriarcha jelly on crackers? Not for me.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT ✉ KYDNEY

Kale: No!!! People know she's like, my annoying little sister! I figured if people were going to assume I was dating one of them it would be O!

Kale: I meant a girl dog! But yeah, that works too, the having a girl and a a dog. Uhhh... I guess? But I figured they just touched it, not rammed it against stuff.

Sydney: Oh! Are you dating O? I never would've assumed that one to be honest but that's because she looks, like, six years older than you.

Sydney: VERY UNCLEAR LOL. And you're probably right, you're the one that's done stuff with girls! I'll defer to your wisdom even if I never use it.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT ✉ SYDANCA

Bianca: Remember that thing where I didn't want to date anyone right now? It wasn't just some lie I told to get rid of you, it's to get rid of everybody.

Sydney: I remember. And that's good to know and all, but I couldn't stop thinking about it and wanted to ask anyway.

Sydney: Were you the one that told her to tell Bailey to try to find me a new girl???

[sydneycalhoun]

text 🎮 gameboys

Bailey: Okay, but if you make any money off the idea I want some of it lol.

Bailey: IF YOU WAIT FOR THEM TO HAPPEN TO YOU THEN THEY'LL NEVER HAPPEN, MY DUDE, YOU GOTTA DO THINGS! Do you think she'd even want to play strip horse with you? She did kinda blow you off for prom. IT WAS SO HOT THO!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU???

Bailey: OKAY, WELL, BOWIE AND I ARE GONNA FIND YOU A NEW GIRL WHO'S INTO HEART STUFF NOW, IT'S COOL.

Sydney: Seems fair :-P

Sydney: It was a hypothetical. But it's not like we didn't hang out at prom anyway, I was with her when she was sick and that was fun! NOPE. Just did not enjoy! It's not that weird, everyone has different tastes.

Sydney: Dude, no.

Sydney: Like, I appreciate the thought and thank you, but if I move on it's not going to be because you and Bianca's friend picked a girl to shove my affections on. No, nope, no thank you. That's not romantic and that's not how I'd want to start my next relationship anyway. Whatever I start next in life CAN'T be about in retaliation to Bianca. That just wouldn't be fair to the next person involved.

[sydneycalhoun]

How often do you masturbate?

Honestly, when I got a corporeal form? I did that a lot! It was a weird and new feeling. Now, though, like, I have other things to do! Dancing and homework and taste-testing my sister’s stuff and playing games. I don’t have that much time to waste on jimminy-jamminy!

[sydneycalhoun]

reeserainbeau:

Not without people wanting to kill them, I mean, you’ve seen that movie about Jesus, right? You can find your good quota, though, little man, I believe in your coding and in whatever off-book learning you’ve been doing, too. People sure talk about pigs flying a lot, though, and they don’t do either. I’ve had a bacon maple donut, but I’ve never made the crossover into the cupcake world. You know me, though; I’m all about the sweets, sometimes the savory ruins it for me.

Which one? I kind of feel like there’s more than one movie about Jesus. And yay, thank you! I believe in you too, even though belief in you was never in question. Did people think pigs were birds at one point? Flying and laying eggs and all that? I have to look that up sometime. Savory can be amazing too, but I feel you - you’re from the sweetest place to ever sweet, after all, your flavor profile is entirely your own.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT 🍳 🕺🏿 CALHOUNS

Sawyer: Well, fortunately you were still in your game when I lost my virginity; I don't think it was really a story you'd have been very proud of :-p Kind of all it takes is buying me good food and I'm good to go lol.

Sawyer: I've read about drinks that actually take the edible elements of Chanel No. 5 and spritz them into a drink before it's poured, but that seems so superfluous to me. You sound like a silly old bear saying that :p Haven't you misused honey ever? I know I have.

Sydney: I'm proud of whatever you do! Even stuff I wouldn't be proud of if someone else did it lol that's your sister privilege :-P And wow, that's something though! And food is your THING so that makes sense.

Sydney: That seems so needlessly indulgent and yet I want to try it??? And LOL I definitely haven't misused honey - I've misused peanut butter a ton but honey has never turned its back on me.

[sydneycalhoun]

Have you ever had an orgasm with a partner?

Let’s just say I’ve been waiting for the right partner.

[sydneycalhoun]

TEXT ✉ KYDNEY

Kale: That's a best friend thing! I'm totally hooking up with my roommate instead, and DJ's like... doing whatever she's doing with Lux, I guess.

Kale: Dude, you should probably get a girl. Although apparently they hump too, I don't understand girl humping. Do you?

Sydney: Okay, if you're sure! Best friend things and couple things get easily confused anyway lol. I'm sure you get it all the time.

Sydney: I can get a girl AND a dog, why not, right? Haha, I can't say I'm an expert on girl humping, but it feels good for them because of the clitoris, I think??